Seohyun’s POV, May 2016

I was stressed so much for about 3 days after that incident, oops, I think I use the wrong word. Shall I just say ‘happening’ instead of ‘incident’? But you know, being an A(blood type) girl who tend to hide her feeling, I never talked about ‘it’ to Yonghwa Oppa. I let it pass. And now 3 months had passed and we’re still doing well. ‘Doing well’ in the term of still contacting each other although just twice a week T.T. But yeah, although I am still a bit confused, I know my heart still want to be with him.

The last time I met him was about a month ago, you know, a classic reason, because we are so busy with our schedule. He must prepare for his upcoming movie and CN’s Japan arena tour, moreover he also had many individual projects for broadcasts, and I still busy with my musical and SNSD’s schedule. Usually, with this kind of schedule we still can meet, but this time, our time always didn’t match. And during that time, we also didn’t have any video call. In the last 3 months, we just have 5 calls and 1 video call that happened 2 months ago. Did I count? Yes! This showed how care I am about this relationship. You must be really surprised if I say: Without checking, I still can remember the last message he sent. It was 2 days ago, around 8 a.m. But that is the truth, I-remember-it-clearly. I also still remember clearly the last time we met, it was a bright day in mid spring when he picked me up from a bookstore.

Flash back

Tiffany Eonni and I didn’t have any schedule, so I asked her to accompany me to bookstore. I really miss the place, since I hadn’t been there for almost a year. But as always, she refused it.

“Why don’t you ask your boyfriend?” she asked.

I rolled my eyes, wondering what word I should use to answer her question.

“My boyfriend? Who? I don’t really remember that I had a boyfriend.”It was the safest answer.

Tiffany Eonni smirked, then laugh hard,“Everyone know that you and Yonghwa are dating, Hyun-ah. Why do you hide it from us? And how come I wouldn’t know that my lovely dongsaeng and my best friend are dating?” Yeah, Tiffany Eonni and Yonghwa Oppa already said that they are best friend. And I admit their closeness. But I don’t admit that I’m his-Yonghwa Oppa’s-girlfriend.

“I’m not. We are not dating yet.”I still insisted to say NO, but I didn’t consious that I said what I shouldn’t : we are not dating yet.

“So you admit that you like him right? Ah... that pabo namja. So he still didn’t confess yet? How many times I order him to confess to you. Aish, you two are frustrating.” Yeah, she is true. I like him. No. Since he alredy taught me about the difference between like and love, I would confidently say that : I know that I love him. I really do. And I did felt his love sometimes ago. DID. Like what I have said before, I really don’t know anything about his feeling now. Moreover, after the happening on Shinhye Eonni’s birthday.

“Eonni, please don’t exchange the topic. Please.” I pleaded, and I continued,

“Come on, accompany me. Ne? Ne?” I used all my aegyo to her.

“Arasseo. I’ll take you there but I’ll wait at the coffee shop opposite the bookstore. Ok?”

“Isn’t it lonely to drink coffee alone? Let’s do this, Eonni. You accompany me then I accompany you. Good idea, right?”

“Nope. I’ll just drive you. I really hate bookstore.” Although I was disappointed, but I should be thankful to her, because I couldn’t ask manager Eonni to drive me and I couldn’t drive alone. I still afraid I might cause an accident since you all already know my driving skill, right?

2 hours later, a text came. It was Yong Oppa.

Yo~ng Oppa : Hyun, na wasseo. I am at bookstore parking lot now. Have you finished buying books? Tiffany said that she had an appointment so she had to leave first.

Oh my God. This Eonni. I knew that she didn’t have any appointment. She just wanna let me spend a short time with Yonghwa Oppa.

Me : Wasseoyo? 5 more minute J Wait ya. And... I’m so sorry for troubling you.

Yo~ng Oppa : kkk... what trouble is this actually? LOL. If you feel sorry, quick go here, I wanna see you ASAP.

‘What? He wanna see me? I wanna see him too... Did he miss me? But it made me more and more confused. Ah molla. I will just njoyed my time with him,’ I thought.

After that, Yonghwa Oppa drove me back to my apartment, and we chat all the way home. When we reached the parking lot, I did ask him if he would like a cup of tea but he refused, he said he must met Han budaepyo in 15 minutes, so we just chatted a bit more and I bid him a goodbye.

Present time

Yeah, it was my last time seeing him. I remembered Jungshin’s question a while ago “Seohyunie, what is your relationship with Yonghwa Hyung actually?” I couldn’t answer it that time, and I still can’t answer it even now. What is my relationship with him? I have told you about how our relationship went, right? And there is another thing you should know: We usually don’t talk much (to each other) when there is other person in our surrounding-even though they are my eonnies or his dongsaengs-, but we talked nonstop when it just the two of us. For the KBS 2014 gayo rehearsal case, I don’t still don’t know why he showed our closeness. I never and will not ask him, I will just let it be and save it as one of our memory. Ah, I also want to say ‘Kamsahabnida’ to whoever filmed us, and uploaded that video, since i can save it and remember that time.

I checked my phone, I re read Yonghwa Oppa’s last message.

“I will fly to Japan this morning. I’ll text you again when I arrived.”

When I got that message, I remember I sighed, ‘He went to other country again, and by the time he comes back to Korea, I think I’ll be at Beijing. We can’t meet again then’. That’s what I thought. The times we both in Korea at the same time are rare. We could count it with finger. I’m not surprised with it. But the thing is, this time, we both in Korea for a more than a week, but he didn’t ask me to meet. It really saddens me. And now, I sighed again ‘Hhh... such a liar.’ Why? Because he didn’t text me after he arrived at Japan.

I am drowning in my own thought about Yonghwa Oppa when my I-phone suddenly vibrates. I open it as quickly as possible, hoping it is from Yonghwa Oppa. No, it’s not. It is Soyou, my bestie.

Soyounie : Juhyun, how are you?

And I quickly replied her,

Me : Fine. What about you? What are you doing now? I’m bored...

Soyounie : I’m really good. Kkk. I’m waiting my turn to record Sistar’s new album. How come you get bored? A Seo Joohyun gets bored? lol

Me :Wha... a new album. I’m waiting for it <3. Hope you all success

Soyounie : Thanks :* btw, did you meet Yonghwa Oppa? You guys got the same time stay in Korea right?

                Yeah, Soyou is one of my bestie who knew about our relationship. Wait... how come she knew about our schedule? I didn’t tell her about his schedule. When I was still writing my reply, another text came.

Soyounie : I met him 3 days ago. But he told me that he didn’t meet you yet.

Wait... what? Soyou and Yonghwa Oppa met 3 days ago? Why he didn’t tell me? I’m actually not a jealous person. But when something like this happened, it saddened me a lot. I am jealous after all. Yeah, He turned me to a jealous person.

I just read that message without reply it. My brain works up to think about why he must meet Soyou and never told me about it. I want to call him right away but I can’t. My pride blocks me. He shall text me first, since he promised to text me, right? Why I shall know it from Soyou and not from himself? My mind goes back to the many times he did exactly like this. The first time was when he went to Thailand, in our WGM days. Everyone remember right? That I knew his whereabouts from the 3rd party? I kept thinking and I realized that I have lost count when Soyou’s message comes again. It was already 10 minutes since her last text.

Soyounie : Hyun? What’s wrong? Why just read not reply? Hmm?

Me : Ah... mianhae. I forgot to reply. kkk. So, where are you met Yong Oppa?“

I lied.

Soyounie : Did you meet him?

She didn’t answer, instead she asked. I want to lie again saying that I met him or just ignore her question, but I can’t.

Me : Nope L That’s why I am jealous. kkk. Just kidding, sist J. So, would you tell me about it?*wink*

Soyouni : Seriously? Hell...  Ei... don’t be jealous over me. We met at movie theater. Hey, would you mind to call me? I’m deadly bored waiting for my turn, and I think talking is better than texting. Right?

Heol. No. Texting is better in this kind of situation. I can’t lie about my feeling nor change my voice to a happy tone. But yeah, being Seo Joohyun who almost never says no, I press the call button.

“Yoboseyo...” I tried to start the conversation.

“Oh Hi. Nah Hyun, wanna hear the whole story? Just promise me, jealous is prohibited.”

“Arasseo...” I tried to sound as normal as I can.

“I met him in front of movie theater. I knew immediately who he is when I glanced at him although he was fully covered up. I thought that you will be there too. But when I reached him and asked, he said that he was alone. And you know that I must be alone right?”

Yes, I know. And that thing is the scariest thing for now anyway. Soyou was just broke up with her boyfriend, so yeah, you know my concern right?

“Eo, I knew.”

“So... he was comforting me about the breakup and then we watched movie together. Wait...don’t get the wrong idea, Ok? We watched separately, just that our seat was next to each other, as always, celebrity spots, in the most back.”

Her story made me collapsed. I know I sound like exaggerating things, but that’s what I felt. When I feel insecure, something like this happened. I wouldn’t mind it if Yong Oppa told me himself. I really wouldn’t. But the fact that he didn’t tell me...

“Yeah...” I tried to sound understanding, but actually I held my tears. Why am I such a crybaby?

“Please don’t misunderstand us, okay?”

“Never. I believe in you, but I don’t know what I should do to him. kkk. Joking anyway.” I tried to make a joke, to ease myself actually. But I couldn’t take it anymore, I should end this phone call.

“Soyou-yah, Sorry, but I need to go to bathroom. Urgent matter. kkk. I’ll text you. Okay?”

“Eo. It also seems my turn is not long after this. So... bye”

“Eo...”

And after that,  Yonghwa Oppa’s goguma point drop from 5/10 to 2/10. Congratulation. And again, my heart tore. I cried silently in my bedroom’s bathroom.

P.S. : How was this? I focused on the flow but I know that I abandoned the sentences(?), the words choices, the tenses I use... I want to make a grand writing but this is my capability. I will improve on my next chapter. I am waiting for your comments. Don’t forget to Up vote and Subscribe if you likeJ. Oh yeah, next chapter will be Yonghwa’s POV. I already have my  plot, a simple one, and I decided to make this become 5 chapters. Iwill not drag it too long since this fic is originally just a one-shot. Stay tuned...