He stared at the woman that waving goodbye to all the people left, she had long said that to the rest of the cast. He looked longingly at her back view, his eyes couldn’t left her even she was just a tiny dot disappearing right from his eyes. He tore his eyes from the door when she finally left the building, he had to stopped the urge to chase after her, telling her he was sorry, he wanted to toke back what he had said, but he couldn’t, for her good, he couldn’t.

“Hyung, are you ok?” Kwang Soo asked concernedly.

“I am ok, just tired after the recording.” He purposely stood up and stretched himself. “I need my beauty sleep’ he joked. “See you.” He took his steps out of building, uttering “Good job, thanks for the hard work” on his way out. He got into his car, greeting his manager, then closed his eyes. Yet, he knew he couldnt rest well, how could he, when he just make the woman he love most depressed and sad. He could see it in her eyes whenever they met, she had chosen to leave him far far away, even agreed to restage MC, he caught her staring at him, with hurt in her two brown eyes, but he ignored it, pretending to be oblivious to her hurt.

The car came to a stop, he waved good bye to his manager and took the lift to his apartment. His parents should be sleeping already, he entered the dark apartment, using lights from his phone to find his way to his room. He had a quick shower, and laid down on his bed, staring at his ceiling. Even if he was tired, sleep wouldnt come, his mind was too meddle with thoughts of her, her lifeless eyes, her sunken cheeks, her tired smile, she even wore makeup, something she seldom do when recording running man, and he was the cause of it.

Better now than later, he told himself, 6 months of happiness wasnt that enough for you, Kim Jong kook, and for her… She deserved more, someone better than you, someone who could do more, love her more, be there for her forever, all the things you couldnt do. He sneered at himself. He was useless, there was only one person he needed to protect with his life and he was incapable of doing that, he had doubted his stand in the industry could protect her from hurt, and seeing her getting hurt is the last thing she wanted to do.

Their six months of heaven, no, to her should be the six months of hell, if she knew he was going to end it, she probably wont agree to be together, who would. But he really love her, he loved her so much, he felt his heart hurting all over again. His tears didn’t slide down his cheeks, that was because he had no more tear left. His arms covered his eyes, he could hear the clock ticking, he hoped she would get over it soon, maybe then he could finally sleep.

He had no sleep in the last few days, but he still functioning like he had his full rest, he said hello to everybody in the practising room.. But then he could only see black and he lost control of everything ………

The next time he woke up, he was staring at a white ceiling, he could hear people whispering, he turned and saw the room full of his loved ones, he tried to give them a reassuring smile, a commotion began, just because he had woke up. He found out that he had been unconscious for 3 days, his body had finally gave up. They thought he was too stress and too tired. He nodded in agreement, that would be the reason, Everyone finally relief that he was ok, he was relief too, everyone thought he was ok.

She didnt visit, all the rest of running man was here but not her, he had missed her but she shouldnt be here, his resolve would break. Now it was midnight, he couldnt sleep again, he had pretended too whenever the doctors and nurses were here. He didnt want to take sleeping pills, he dont deserved sleep, he really didnt, He stared at the ceiling, he was too wired up to leave the room. His thoughts would drift towards her, then he forced himself to think of work.

“Oppa,” a gentle female voice greeted him, he had reflective closed my eyes whenever he heard the door open. It was hers, he dared not opened his eyes now, maybe he had a dream, maybe it was real but no matter what, he couldnt open my eyes.

He felt a pair of cold hands touched his face, “i thought you wanted to part, but why are you torturing yourself now, it had been three weeks, and you are still not happy. I tried to listen to you, so you could be happy but you are not. What do you want…” she said while crying, her tears burnt his face.

She was right,  he didnt know what he wanted, he just couldnt stay a couple with her. There was too much bad vipes going on now.  

She buried herself in his chest, her tears still flowing, then her sobs subsided. He opened his eyes, she must have fallen asleep, his hands reaching out to soothen her hair, she sat up looking in his eyes, “You are not sleeping,:” her voice trembling. “You scared me! You were the one who wanted to break up but why did you end up worse than me.” Her tears flowed again. “Why … Why Oppa?”

He looked into her eyes, there was no answer to her question, he wanted her to be happy, but her sunken eyes showed of her unhappiness, her anguish. “I thought this would be the best for you, i don’t care about me, but i hated it when you are hurt, when you become unhappy. ..” he paused, “But i ended up doing those things to you, i hated myself, i couldnt promise you happiness, i hated that .. i hated myself when i couldnt do things i wanted you to have and when i inflicted all those pain, i just couldnt live with myself. Ji Hyo ah, please be happy please be what you were, forget me, then i would slowly love myself again, really. I dont deserve anything, please dont love me.”

“Oppa, it is too late, i am too in love to dont love you. I can only be happy when i am with you. My happiness begins with you. You can protect me from those people who would hurt me, i believe you can, i know you can. Oppa, please dont ask me not to love you, you deserve more, you deserve me, stop torturing yourself.” She held his hands forcing him to look at her.

“I. .. “ he didnt know what to say.

“These three weeks had been hell, Oppa, stop torturing us. We were are to be a pair, we really are.” She insisted, hoping to instill confidence back to him.

“Ji Hyo, we could be together?” She nodded.

“Ji Hyo ah, you would be happy?” She nodded even harder.

‘Ji Hyo ah, i would protect you, be your strongest shield and wall?” She nodded with all her might.

“Ji Hyo ah, you would still believe in me and love me?”

She looked at him, bending down until was near her ears. “YES!!! I WOULD” she shouted, undeniably feeling much better at her little revenge. His hands instinctively protected his ears, he turned his head and saw her grinning face, he smiled too.

“Ji Hyo ah, i will take that you are sure of us, and confident of us, so i will believe in you, believe in us. I will be promised to be anything you wanted me to be, to do. I love you Ji Hyo, I love you. My happiness is you, i can only be happy when you are ,,, i promise you.”

“My Jong Kook oppa, I love you too. Promise me dont keep your problems in your heart, i wont too, promise you would tell me and share with me.” Ji Hyo looked into his eyes, she wanted to let him see how serious she was. “If you dare to do this next time, your punishment would not be so light.” She threatened. He nodded his head, “don't think because i love you, i wont punished you.” Her finger slowly slid on his face. He nodded his head again.

“Now,” she yawned, “I needed my sleep too. You ...” She indicated him to move over a bit, she got on his bed and laid beside him. He smiled feeling her sleeping bug had inflicted him with sleep too. He yawned, his eyes slowly closing, his heart fill with ease, he was surrounded by her, he was finally at peace, yes, his happiness was her. He wrapped his hand around her, and both of them fell asleep peaceful together, knowing they would wake up together and be forever together.