suddenly approached.       July 7th, 2015.
That was the day when everything Yoona thought about the world turned out to be another stupid lie. She hated it when people would come up to her and say "Everything's going to be alright." because it's not. She didn't need all those lies coming out from the mouths of people around her because she knew that nothing will be able to erase all of her stupid, selfish, and reckless mistakes. So from that day onwards, Yoona despised herself. There was no longer any sign of the carefree, youthfull, wild child she used to be. After looking back at her old self through her photobooks and diary, she realized that the drastic turnover in her life was her fault all along.

After being discharged from the hospital, she did everything she could to change herself. She hated the fact that every morning she had to wake up inside her own body. The filthy and useless body that put her own selfishness ahead of her own friends. She did everything it took to run away from the old Yoona; the long, silky chestnut colored hair she used to have was now died back to black and cut a few inches above her shoulders, her old style of wearing exposed and tight clothes were now thrown out the window and replaced with plain jeans, plain t-shirts, hoodies and a pair of worn out Chuck Taylors. However, with every effort she gave either it being big or small, she knew for sure that it would never be enough to make the pain at her heart and the throbbing in her head feel at ease.

On the night before Monday, Yoona was up in her room sitting at her desk with the cup of hot chocolate her mom sent up for her still left untouched beside her. Her room would be surely seem like pure darkness if it wasn't for the moonlight that danced it's way through her window and the small, orange table lamp she used for studying.

It's been a week since she was finally discharge from the hospital. Even though the doctor said she was good to go, Yoona couldn't agree with him. The lass felt worse than ever. She started skipping meals even if her stomach longed to be fed. She kept having nightmares of the accident which created the dark circles under her eyes. Her skin was starting to get paler by the day and although she knew how much she had to go out to find some fresh air, she couldn't get herself to do it.

Nevertheless, the thought of going back to school and starting her third year the next day was eating her up alive. She didn't want to return to the place that was full of memories and she knew she wouldn't be able to face her friends ever again. Yoona felt like she just wanted to cage herself in her room and avoid any kinds of interactions with people other than her family. As result to feeling completely stressed out, confused, and frustrated, Yoona started scribbling words into her diary. Words that were painful to her and words that had a big effect towards how she feels. But aside from that, she felt her hand was moving into writing a bunch of dates. For a reason she couldn't even understand was how in the world was she able to write all of those numbers down while some of them didn't even look the least bit familiar to her? Her grip on the pen was hard, and she scribbled to the point the paper was starting to tear up.

"Yoona, are you coming down? Mom's made dinner." She flinched in her seat and turned around see her older brothers head popping out of her white wooden door.

She shook her head softly with a gentle smile on her face, but her eyes clearly filled with sorrow, "No, just tell mom I'll eat later."

Kibum heaved a desperate sigh with his lips pursed before stepping in. "You know you're lying."

He asked if he could turn on the lights with a small gesture and Yoona nodded in reply. Kibum then slowly made his way to the edge of her bed before studying the few changes in her room.

"Where are all your posters?" he asked when he noticed posters of her favorite punk rock bands were no longer there. The only thing that was left on her cream colored walls were traces of sticky tape that used to be for hanging up the decorations in her room.

"I threw them away," Yoona shrugged nonchalantly.

The look in her eyes stopped him from asking more. He knew that Yoona's condition was still unstable and that it would be better if he just kept quiet but kept supporting her from behind. So instead of asking the questions that were stacking up into files inside his head, he only nodded in response.

"You know, mom's made your favorite dish, right? Why don't you want to come down and eat with us?" Kibum pouted with an intention of trying to ask her in a way that was not too forceful.

Yoona chuckled softly as she shook her head before lowering it. "I'm just not really hungry."

"Tell me, when was the last time you actually had a decent meal?"

The lass thought for a second, "This morning?"

"What? That was not a decent meal. You pretty much just had an apple," Kibum retorted desperately. "Please come eat with us. Just for today at least, and maybe tomorrow, and the day after tomorrow, and maybe the day after that-"

"Okay, okay," Yoona managed a short laugh before she stood up from her swivel chair. "I'll eat."

Kibum was mentally giving himself a good pat on the back after receiving his well-owned victory.

  ▲▼▲▼

Monday morning finally came and as much as she wanted to, Yoona couldn't do anything to avoid it. She tried her best to convince her parents that she was still too sick to leave the house. Her dad thought that maybe they should give her a few more days to prepare herself mentally but her mom thought the opposite. After receiving a call from the principle asking if her daughter would be coming back for her studies, Mrs. Choi thought that the sooner the better.

After changing into her uniform, Yoona made her way downstairs where her family was already gathered. Her father was just folding back his daily newspaper and Kibum had just finished his bowl of cereal. Then there was her mom, wearing her usual yellow apron and a pale blue handkerchief wrapped around her hair. Yoona's mom was a house-wife whilst her father worked as a manager at a car company. Kibum on the other hand, played music. He often had gigs at cafes or clubs but he spends most of his free time at home writing lyrics, hoping to one day find a good composer.

"I forgot how beautiful my daughter looked in her uniform." Her dad smiled before planting a kiss on her forehead.

Yoona's mom took off her apron and came over to wrap her arms around her daughter. It was one of those hugs that every daughter loved receiving from their mother. It was tight, yet comforting, warm and lasted for just the perfect amount of time. "If you feel like coming home, just call us and your brother will pick you up, okay?" Yoona smiled weakly and nodded nodded.

"So, what do you want for breakfast? We have pancakes and cereal," her mother said as she turned her back to find either a plate or a bowl.

Yoona bit her bottom lip. "Is it alright if I just bring an apple to school today? I'm still kind of full from dinner last night."

"Oh, please. Yoona honey, my sweet little baby sister, it's been like 12 hours since we've had dinner. How could you still feel full? I ate more than you last night and yet I still felt starving when I woke up. At least bring two apples."

Not wanting to force anything onto her just yet, they thought that at least the girl was still feeding her stomach some food although it wasn't much. In the end, the family let her off with bringing two apples and a bottle of banana milk to school.

"Do you want me to drive you?" Her dad offered as his eyes peeked through his reading glasses.

"With the car?"

"Yes, of course with the car."

Yoona stiffened and gulped a ball of saliva that was suddenly stuck in . "Um, no that's fine. I'll go by myself."

"Oh no, young lady. You're not allowed to go anywhere by yourself yet. Your brother's taking you," her mom said, placing her hands on her hips.

The screeching sound of a chair being pushed back across the porcelain floor was heard. "Yeah, I was going to find myself another backpack anyway. I could take you on the way."

"What happened to your old backpack?" Yoona's mom had her eyes furrowed and they were suspiciously looking at her son.

"Um, it.. uh, I – " Kibum cleared his throat, "it ripped."

"It what?!" both parents exclaimed with eyes wider than the other.

"Kibum, you know how expensive that was," Mrs. Choi said in desperation.

"Well sorry," he threw his hands up in defense before bringing his eyes to wander around the room. "It wasn't my fault the fences had sharp nails sticking out – wait, wait, wait, I don't think I was supposed to say that."

He chuckled nervously and looked at his little sister before looking up at the ticking wall clock. "Oh, now won't you look at the time. Come on Yoona, you'll be late for class. Let your amazing brother take you, okay?" He quickly circled his arm around his sisters as he tried to escape the adults' gazes

"Choi Kibum, what did you get yourself into that involved climbing over fences?" It was their father's stern voice that was heard this time.

"Technically, I didn't say I climbed over a fence so you can't use that to – " Kibum's voice suddenly started trailing off when he noticed the angry look on his parents' faces.

"Fine!" He threw his hands in the air. "We went to a party and the police found us. You should be grateful I actually escaped or else you'd probably be facing me at the police station right about now." Kibum slumped his body back onto the c