Morning !! new chapter with JETI past ....... ENJOY!!!

[JESSE P.O.V]

I frowned deeply in confusion with Taeyeon's mysterious words; so I repeated the sentence:

“Part of my past… that I never knew? But… what are you talking about, Tae?”

“I will tell you everything, but can you tell me what really happened between you and Tiphany since the beginning?”

“I don’t know where you are going with this, but I don’t want to—“

“Please, Jeshe. It’s important...”

Seeing the sincerity in his eyes, I gave in as I looked around to the beautiful moon again, remembering the first time I saw her eye-smile…

[FLASHBACK]

When I was in the elementary school, maybe when I was 8 years old, I was very lonely without any friend since I was named ice prince due to my cold semblance. And since then I always enjoyed a good book, I managed to deal with my solitude very well… until I heard her voice for the first time. I was sleeping in the boring classroom with my head on my arms. But when I heard her cracking Korean, I felt curious about this new girl:

“I am Hwang Stephanie. B-but you can call me Tiffany. Please, take care of me!”

Her angelic voice attracted me as I couldn’t help but to raise my head to see her. Once my eyes captured the sight before me, I quickly adjusted my glasses to assure myself that I wasn’t dreaming. Right aside the teacher, there was a small girl that had chubby cheeks and was wearing her cute ponytail and her pink backpack. I could hear some whispers of my classmates, but I wasn’t paying attention, the only thing that mattered at that moment was looking at her. 

Unconsciously I felt my heartbeat increasing its pace as I stared at her, totally mesmerized; yet when the teacher asked her to choose a seat, my heart pounded like mad when I saw her looking to my direction with her eyebrows raised in surprise. Soon, a grin crept on her lips as she walked to my direction and seated beside me while placing her backpack atop the desk. I tried my best to avert my stare coz’ she could think that I was some kind of creep, so I tensed my jaw and looked down when I heard her heavenly and soft girly tone at me:

“Hmmm… h-hi, I am Stephanie Hwang. What is your name?” 

Although my tongue knotted in my throat in nervousness, I gulped loudly as I started to look up slowly until I stared at her melting eyes:

“J-Jung J-Jesse.” I cursed myself for looking such an idiot in front of her, but it looks like she was surprised with my name as she beamed:

“Oh my God, are you American too?” She said quickly spitting a little, but I didn’t mind, she was cute. A chuckle escaped from my lips due to her hyper mode when I nodded in agreement, answering quietly in English:

“Yeah, from San Francisco.” “Wow, me too!” And I became dumbfounded when I saw her eye-smile for the first time; my heart was throbbing under my chest as my cheeks were warm due to her beautiful smile. Out of sudden, she surprised me while smiling and extending her hand, gesturing me to accept it. Once I did, I felt the warmth when our hands touched while I felt the softness of her delicate hand; we looked at each other’s eyes and she spoke happily:

“I hope we can be good friends, Jessie!”

“Me too, wait—Jessie?” “That’s how I will call you from now on… Jessie…”

That moment I knew that my life wouldn’t be the same…

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Each day I watched her from afar and more I would feel the same butterflies in my stomach. I wanted to talk with her so badly, but due to my shyness and nervousness, I never was able to. However, while the other kids were running in the school playground, I was debating with myself on how to start a conversation with her. However, I saw a pink rose at a small garden beside me. Making up my mind, I looked at Tiffany from afar and I smiled to myself due to my idea. So, I gingerly reached the flower and sniffed the smooth perfume. Taking a deep breath, I walked to her with the rose behind me. I gently smiled to a distracted Fany; she was playing with the other girls with her dolls, totally unaware of her surroundings. As soon as I started to remove the rose behind my back, I uttered hesitantly:

“Ste—“ 

“Hey, Tiffany! Remember me?!”

An unknown voice broke my concentration when a boy appeared behind her with a cocky smile plastered on his face. As soon Tiffany turn around, she beamed in happiness as she pulled him in for an engulfing hug:

“SIWON-OPPA! I missed you so much! Where have you been?”

The show off boy a.k.a Siwon flashed a cocky smile to her making Tiffany and her friends stare at him dreamily and I didn’t like it one bit. However, one of my deceptions started when he removed an ostentatious bouquet behind him to present Tiffany. Once again she beamed and pulled him to a tight hug as the other girls eyed the scene enviously; soon that scene was getting more attention as my classmates were curious to know who this new student was. Yet, I would never forget that moment when our eyes met; he kept hugging Tiffany who was with her back against me, there was him with a mocking smirk. 

Seeing that scene, I felt my first sadness in my whole life, how I wanted to have her hugging me like that or at least, looking at me with those same warm eyes. I can remember like today the same piercing pain in my heart when that scene replayed on my mind infinity times. Unable to look at them again, I lowered my hand in defeat and frowned sadly as the tug in my heart remained; turning around slowly, I left the playground as the rose dropped from my hand hesitantly, but still, I kept walking without knowing that the boy named Siwon would be my major obstacle to reach Tiffany…

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Three years passed and I still couldn’t talk with her. Although I tried many times, every time I failed when the most popular boy of the class, Choi Siwon was with Tiffany every single moment. Even if he wasn’t there, he made sure to keep his gang or ‘bodyguards’ with her, maybe to assure that I wouldn’t try anything or someone else. However, a couple months later, everything changed… Tiffany was absent for a few days on the school and I was starting to get worried.

Surprisingly, one day she entered the classroom without uttering a word and sitting beside me. Even with everyone glancing at her, she remained emotionless, her eyes weren’t lively and happy anymore and I could see her bloodshot eyes very clearly. My heart ached with the sight, but I didn’t know what to do because I didn’t know what really happened. That day, the mood was extremely heavy and sad, even the sky was sad due to the dark clouds. Then, the bell rang and it was time to go; Tiffany quickly grabbed her belongings, leaving without saying a word. I knew something was wrong, so while I went down the corridor, I heard the whispers making me stop on my tracks:

“Her mother passed away last week…” “Really? Oh poor Tiffany…” “Yeah, she must be really broken now, what about her dad and sister?” “I don’t know, but I heard that in her mother’s funeral, she couldn’t stop crying and refused to leave her grave.” “Really sad…”

I held myself not to cry, because I knew how it was to lose someone special, I knew because my dad passed away a few years ago. Yet, I really wanted to do something for her, but what could I do? I could feel her pain, but this time I wanted to act different; so, even with the dark sky, I could see a familiar pink silhouette running to the bleachers. I knew that only someone had that backpack, so I ran faster than I could, worried about her until I reached the bleachers. However, I rapidly stopped my tracks when I heard some voices; I frowned when I realized that it was Siwon. Right atop the bleachers, I saw them talking; I clearly heard her shaking voice saying something about “Don’t go”. Although it hurt me seeing her in such delicate state, I wished to be the one to comfort her…

As if the heaven listened to my wish, I saw him running down the bleachers and leaving her alone. Once I looked up, there was her, seated on the bench and hugging her knees. The scene moved me so deeply, she looked so defenseless and alone seating by herself. Nonetheless, out of sudden, a pouring rain started to fall and she didn’t care about getting a cold, she remained at her same position. I frowned in disapproval and concern so I quickly opened my umbrella and I let my feet drag me to her. In front of her, I placed my umbrella atop of her, shielding her from the rain; even when she was practically soaked. She realized the lack of water and hesitantly, she looked up until our eyes met…

And I swear that moment; I found it hard to breathe. But with her stare, I felt like… she was expecting me. We stared at each other for some minutes as the rain poured around us; we have so much to say, but neither one of us spoke. Still, she surprised me when a thankful smile played in her lips as she bowed at me; I returned her smile with my soft one as I extended my hand to her. I silently thanked God when she finally placed her warm hand on mine, still was soft like the first day I saw her. Yet, once she stood up, I quickly removed my jacket and wrapped it around her to protect her from the cold; all the time, she stared at me warmly and I looked down shyly to hide my flushed face as I muttered uncertainly:

“I will take you home.”

She nodded at me as she wrapped her arm around mine, guiding me to her house. On the way, we didn’t exchanged words, but something told me that she was feeling much relaxed than before. My heart doubled its pace when she leaned her head on my shoulder; my face was warm, but I remained composed. Breaking my own thoughts when I realized that we arrived on her destination, I looked down coyly as I mumbled softly:

“You can call me whenever you need, okay?”

My words made a sincere smile crept on her lips as she nodded truthfully. Once I waved at her hesitantly and turned around to leave, I heard her soft, yet beautiful voice after awhile:

“T-Thank you, Jessie. Thanks for being here and for everything…”

When I was about to dismiss her honest sentence due to my shyness, she surprised me when I felt two comfy arms around me. My mind was blank when I finally realized that she was hugging me. And as if my body knew, it reacted by itself, not even caring about how I was getting wet due to her soaked clothes, I closed my eyes and wrapped my arms around her instantaneously; oh how I dreamt about this day… it was amazing. My nostrils caught her sweet perfume and I felt my body lost the control; my heartbeat was incredibly fast, shivers running by my spine and I was almost melting in my spot. Unfortunately, she withdrew and smiled at me once again. I looked down and spoke after a loud gulp:

“Y-you can go ahead, I will wait for you enter first.”

With this, she finally opened the door and turned around to wave at me warmly with a kind smile until she closed the door slowly. When I was alone again, I felt everything again when I remembered the hug, it was the most wonderful thing that I ever felt, still… I couldn’t decipher my own feelings... 

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Days, weeks, months passed and we found ourselves deeply connected so fast. Each time I learned something about Tiffany, the more I found that we had a lot in common, which was a good thing. The good news was that as time passed by, she felt less pain about her mother and slowly, started to smile often. And I was endorsed in to be her personal guardian, yes you heard right… After that incident with Siwon and Tiffany on bleachers; no one was between us and our friendship. Our bond was so strong that our friends would call us strawberry and banana or cookies and cream, kinda cheesy I must admit.

Then, I finally could know her family; her father, Mr. Hwang, a very good man and her young sister, SeoHyun, a very timid and polite girl. Her little sis always was really adorable, but due to her shyness and innocence, the other kids would mess or bully her. Just like the other day, when I was walking the corridor, a bunch of kids were making fun of her; that scene enraged me deeply. So I went to them, placed myself in front of her and gave my most ice glare to that stupid gang. As expected, they ran away thanks to my cold demeanor; then, seeing that the coast was clear again, I turned around and frowned when I saw her sniffing faintly. My lips quivered sadly as I kneeled in front of her and helped her to get her books, speaking softly:

“Hey, SeoHyun-ah… don’t let the others mess with you just because you are shy. I know you are smart and very strong, don’t doubt yourself okay?”

“T-thanks, Jesse oppa. I – I will try my best.”

I smiled relieved as I helped her get up from the floor. It hurt me to see those stupid’s bullying her, she was like my little sis and I didn’t want anything to harm her. So to make her feel secure and comfortable again, I smiled softly and patted her head gently:

“I know you do, but I will be around to help you. You are my dear dongsaeng, you know?”

She chuckled timidly at me as I laughed along; but out of sudden, I became surprised as she whispered truthfully while looking at my eyes:

“Jesse-oppa… thanks for helping me and Fany unnie. I really think that unnie is very happy after she met you... Oh, I have to go now bye, oppa! See you around!”

I was dumbfounded with her words at first, so Tiffany was feeling better indeed, I was relieved and I couldn’t help to smile due her remark. Yet, some days later, something unexpected happened. While me and Steph were lying on the carpet of her room and doing our homework, she started to poke my cheek with her pencil teasingly:

“Ya, this hurts! What do you want, Hwang?”

“Huh? Nothing!”

I faked an angry tone, but my voice only made her giggle as she seated on the carpet floor. And once again, she poked my cheek once more: “Arghh, what do you want? I am trying to make my homework here and it's already 9 PM!”

“Sorry, Jessie… I promise I won’t do it again”.

After I saw her pout, I almost lost my composure, aish how can she be so cute? I was about to ignore her playfully, but when I felt a strong gaze on my back, I looked up to meet her meaningful stare. Rolling my eyes, I seated on her bed and looked at her seriously:

“I know this stare… come on, Steph. Tell me what happened…”

“Hmmm nothing, Jessie, I am just thinking too much…” Somehow I wasn’t convinced, much more when I saw her fidgeting her fingers coyly with her head lowered. Then, I sighed and gingerly held her shoulder to get her attention as I uttered intently: “Really?” That moment, she hesitated and stopped fidgeting her fingers. Once she seated beside me, she turned her head to my side and started into an uneven tone:

“Let’s just say that I – I know a boy that, well… hmm he is being very good for me and I wanted to return his kindness. And well, since you are a boy… what do you think it could be nice, Jessie?”

When I heard mentioning another boy, I felt a sharp pain in my heart, I couldn’t decipher what. Although I didn’t want to be indelicate with her, I breathed heavily as I realized she was looking at me expectantly with her big round eyes, so I said the truth:

“Honestly, anything coming from you already is priceless and important. And this boy would be very stupid if he doesn’t agree…” 

“Thanks, Jessie!” She smiled at me brightly with her beautiful eye-smile and I was stunned. Yet, I smiled weakly and patted her shoulder gently as I stood up to grab my belongings:

“Well, I guess it’s getting pretty late. I better go home now. Hmm, I hope I could help you, Steph. B-bye.”

The truth was that I wanted to leave her room immediately after she spoke about this ‘unknown boy’, I felt kinda sad but I couldn’t let her realize it. So before she could answer, I already was reaching the knob when a hand stopped me. I looked at her quizzically while she merely smiled tenderly, then out of sudden; she startled me when she wrapped her arms around me into a tight hug. In an impulse, I quickly reacted placing my hands around her waist into a protecting hug, it was so good when she was the one who took the initiative. My heart was beating so loud that I was afraid that she could hear, but the most important… why was she acting like this way? My questions were answered when she withdrew from my arms and stared at me deeply, whispering warmly with her amazing and melting brown eyes:

“Hyunnie told me what you've done for her today…” My eyes widened in answer as she continued into a soft tone without breaking our stare: “And thanks to you, she looked much more confident and comfortable with herself. So since you didn’t tell me what you wanted as a thankful gift, I choose it by myself…” My eyes still were widened when something in my mind clicked, so she did was talking… about me? But how …

“Jessie, I can’t think of a way to show you how grateful I am about what you’ve done. SeoHyun is very precious to me and my family, but you know as much as I want to, I can’t protect her 24/7 from those bullies. Honestly, I wanted to do much more for you, but for now… I can only do this to prove what your action really meant to me.”

To prove her point, Tiffany leaned slowly and tenderly placed a soft kiss on my left cheek. The kiss was brief as she quickly pulled back with a blush on her face and I was more than sure that my face was flushed and burning. However, I was agape when she smiled shyly at me, bowing her head, speaking softly: “G-good night, Jessie. I – I will see you tomorrow, thank you!” And I merely nodded my head, still with my agape expression as I finally left her room, waving dumbly at her. 

On that same night, when I came home, I still couldn’t utter a word. So I reached my room and lied on my bed while staring at the ceiling. Unconsciously, my hand touched the spot where she kissed and I suddenly felt warm again as if the feeling of her lips still was lingering on my cheek. No words could ever describe what I felt at that moment; I was like ecstatic, fearful, anxious, hot, cold, happy, everything at the same moment. I closed my eyes and I could only see her face in my memory. Placing my hand on my pounding heart, every missing piece of this puzzle started to make sense. Her smiles, kind words, hugs, touches; my body was getting warm only to remember.

After a sleepless night thinking… my mouth dropped in result when the realization hit me faster than an arrow…

I was falling for Stephanie Hwang… and there is nothing that could change this fact…

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Two years passed and we finally reached the High School. I was 15 years old and Fany, 14 years. And those two years nothing changed about us, in fact, we got closer than before; the difference was that my love only increased for her through the years, yet, she never knew because I made sure to hide my true feelings from her.

However, one day, I wasn’t being able to hide it anymore; I would feel jealous or hurt when another guy caught her attention or how my heart would pound like crazy whenever our hands brushed together. After a lot of time thinking and with my best friend's, Yuri, advice, I got courage to confess her my true feelings. I planned everything; I would tell her the truth once the class ended. I even talked to her to wait for me on the bleachers before going. That day, I barely could think properly since I was really nervous and… afraid of a rejection, still I have to tell her how I really feel. Even if she didn’t return my feelings, I would still love her enough to see her happy, that’s all that matters for me.

After the class finally ended, the bell rang as the students quickly rushed out the classroom. I felt more worried when I didn’t hear about Tiffany since our break maybe it’s because we have some different classes. But before going to our personal spot, I hurriedly ran to a flower shop to find a beautiful bouquet of pink roses for her. I saved some money and I started to work to help home, so I didn’t have a lot of money like the other kids did. Yet, I always made an effort to achieve an objective. However, to my unhappiness, the bouquet was expensive and… I didn’t have enough of money to buy a beautiful one for her. I only could buy a single flower, but I made sure to look for the most beautiful, perfumed and perfect one just like her…

When I was about to leave the shop, the ahjumma who helped me to choose the flower was so nice to me that even gave me a cute card while asking if the girl I was about to present, was my girlfriend. That moment I only smiled weakly and answered ‘Hopefully’; so she smiled warmly at me and waved at me as I left the shop, bowing and showing my gratitude. I looked to the watch and I knew I was late, so I ran faster by the soccer field anxiously; I looked up and smiled warmly when I saw her lonely figure waiting for me. Just when I was about to continue, like a nightmare, I saw a guy approaching from her and hugging her from her back. I knew she was startled, but once she saw who was the ‘stranger’ a bright smile formed into her lips as she beamed in true ha