“Are you okay, Mark? Who were those girls?” He asked, brushing my down.

“I’m not really sure, I’m sure it was a mistake. Don’t worry.” I said, fixing my hair.

“Let’s go get a coffee and warm you up.” He said, pulling at my coat sleeve.

“Can I ask you a question?”

“Of course.”

“What were you doing when I came back to our room the other day?” He didn’t say anything. “You know, after you got back from Yugyeom’s room?”

“Oh, well. Not much really.” He said, sounding uncomfortable again.

“You seemed really nervous. And you’re clothes where everywhere.”

“I just…I was um…Listen, Yugyeom gave me a magazine, and basically…I don’t know how to explain this.” He struggled with the words. It sounded like he was trying to speak a different language and didn’t know what words to use.

“What kind of magazine was it?” we were nearly at the coffee shop now, just a few more steps and we’d be there.

“What coffee would you like? I’ll buy.” He said reaching into his pocket to bring out his wallet.

“Stop changing the subject.” I laughed a little, not fully understanding why he was so nervous.

“How about I just show you when we get back?” He said and disappeared into the shop. He knew what kind of coffee I liked, so I don’t even know why he’d asked me. I waited patiently until he returned, handing me a steaming cup of black coffee. Two sugars.

“Is it a fashion magazine?” I asked, thinking of magazines that could be the reason his clothes and bed were everywhere.

“Not at all.” He laughed.

“A yoga magazine?”

“Something like that.” He laughed again. Just what on earth was that magazine?

We walked back to our room, chatting and laughing again like we used to. It made my heart warm. I hadn’t realised I’d missed this until it was dangling back in front of my face. I grabbed it with both hands.

“You know Junior snores like a fog horn?” I said, opening our door.

“Oh, I know. He sounds like his airways are blocked.” Jackson placed his coffee on the desk and took his coat off.

As I too, took off my coat, my phone buzzed. ‘Die scum. You are a worthless piece of dirt under my shoe.’ It was the withheld number again. Who the hell was sending me these? What had I done to this person?

“Is everything alright?” Jackson asked, sitting down on his bed with his coffee in his hand again.

“Oh, yeah. Everything’s fine.” I wasn’t really sure what this person wanted from me, and telling Jackson wouldn’t help, so I guess I’d have to keep it to myself for now. I sat opposite Jackson on my own bed and sipped my coffee.

“So, the magazine.” I said. I could see the panic in his eyes as his mouth formed a line.

“You won’t let me get away with anything, will you?” He reached behind his pillow to bring out the magazine. The front page was folded over.

“So, what is it?” I asked, inquisitively leaning forward.

“Okay, promise me you won’t laugh.”

“I promise.” I said and got up from my bed, placed my coffee down and sat next to Jackson to take a better look.

The magazine was weird. The colours were oversaturated and heavily contrasted. I unfolded the front page and the writing said ‘First Hand’ in yellow script. The image on the front was of a half- man with lots of ropes draped over his torso. It wasn’t the artistic kind of image, it was more…vulgar.

“What the heck is this?” I asked, shying away from the magazine. I’d never looked at anything like this. Not even with girls on the front.

“It’s something Yugyeom gave me. It’s kind of…well, the conversation took a strange turn and we started talking about .”

“Jackson!” I cried in embarrassment. Why were they talking about THAT together?

“What? It’s just a magazine.”

“With a guy on it. I dare to even think about what’s inside it.”

“If you really want to know, it’s got articles and pictures of interesting positions.”

“So, what were you doing with it yesterday?”

“I was…trying out the positions.” Jackson said quietly. His face burned and his eyes were wide.

I started laughing, and didn’t stop until I fell to the floor.

“Well, how do you expect I get better if I don’t practice?” He smiled. Which just sent my face into heat overdrive too.

-

I’ve just realised I’ve completely forgotten to send them to university, haahhaahahahahah OOPS!