Oh god no. Why did this have to happen to me?

“Mark, who is that?” Jackson asked, stepping a little closer to me.

“It’s no one.” I said, as Gi-Eun started trotting over towards us. I wanted to disappear and take Jackson with me.

“Hiii!” She called again. I said nothing back to her until she was standing in front of me smiling with her pink cheeks.

“Hi,”

“So, how are you?” She asked, in her voice which I was slowly growing to hate. I remembered how cold and violent her lips had felt against mine. I never wanted to feel that again, nor did I want Jackson to find out I had disgraced his honour by even wondering what kissing this girl would be like.

“I’m alright, uh, and you?” I asked without wanting to know the answer at all.

“I’m really good thank you. I wanted to ask if you wanted to come to mine tonight.” She was swaying herself backwards and forwards on her toes. I imagined pushing her over and seeing her annoying face distort into confusion and then sadness.

“What for?” I wanted to lace my hand back into Jackson’s. But I was too nervous around this girl, and not in the good way.

“To hang out. Maybe we could do some work together.”

“I actually already have plans with Jackson tonight.” Please go along with it, please go along with it.

“You do?” He asked. God damn it, Jackson.

“Yeah, remember, BamBam asked us to study at his?” I tried to play it up, raising my eyebrows at him as inconspicuously as possible.

“Brilliant, why don’t I join you?” did she not know how to take a hint?

“Sorry, but it’s just us, Gi-Eun.”

“Well, okay. Text me?” She didn’t wait for an answer and trotted back to her friends who were watching her every move. When she got back to them they all started giggling.

“So that was Gi-Eun?” Jackson asked. We walked over to a bench to sit down. The view was amazing. I could see every inch of the town from here.

“Uh, yeah.” I placed my hand on the bench, inching it close to Jackson’s. I wanted to hold his hand again so badly.

“Were you ever going to tell me you two kissed?” His words were cold, but he didn’t look pissed off.

“Jackson, how did you-?”

“I saw you.”

“Oh.”

Of course. He had been in our room. How stupid could I be sometimes.

“I wasn’t going to tell you. I didn’t want you to feel bad.”

“That’s the reason I was shouting at you earlier.” He said, his face turned away from me.

“I had no idea you’d see that, I’m sorry, Jackson.” How could I have messed up so colossally to have let this sweet, sincere, beautiful human being see me being a cheating devil?

Could I call it cheating? We weren’t technically together. But I could see now, wanting him around everywhere I went, that when I looked at him all I felt was warmth.

“Why weren’t you going to tell me?” He was still looking away from me. I would give my left leg for his brown eyes to rest on me.

“Because it was a mistake, I didn’t even want to do it.”

“Then, why did you?”

That I couldn’t answer. I had wanted to figure things out, but saying that seemed like a terrible idea.

He stood and walked a little bit away and then came back to stand in front of me. “I’ve got to go, Mark. I’ll see you back at the room.”

“Jackson, wait!” I called, but he was already walking pretty fast.

Great. Now I’d blown my friendship and the person who made my soul feel warm. I was going to sit there and do what I had originally intended and try to clear my hair, which I very much needed to do now, but I saw Gi-Eun start to walk over here and wave. I quickly pulled out my phone, nod once, hang up and storm off towards the trail.

The walk back down didn’t help much either because I found our spilled coffee in the ice.

When I got back to our room, Jackson wasn’t there. He’d left his coat and gloves though. I sat on his bed and felt the fur of his hood. I looked out the window to see the place Gi-Eun had kissed me and I decided I needed to get under my covers and smell Jackson on my sheets.