Tao doesn't want to wake up.   He briefly remembers crying the night before, how he'd tried to stay quiet and not wake Kris.   He hadn't meant to cry so much, but after spending the afternoon and most of the night with Chen, he'd sort of broken down.   Chen wasn't getting any better. He seemed like an entirely different person now than when Tao had visited him that first day.   More often than not, he was sleeping, knocked out from whatever drugs they were giving him to kill the cancer that was growing in his lungs, making it harder and harder for him to even breathe.    He had barely been awake when Tao was with him, and even when he was, he seemed so out of it, barely even saying anything.   Tao had soon found out why.   The cancer had been so advanced that the doctors had wanted to use more aggressive chemotherapy to combat it, one of the side affects being amnesia and short-term memory loss.    So Chen was slowly forgetting some things. Tao kept gently reminding him that he was Tao, not Chanyeol.   If his scan came back negative, they would stop chemo and switch to radiation instead.   At that point, his memories should return to normal and everything would be okay.   Assuming the cancer hadn't spread to other parts of his body.   Tao takes a deep breath and musters the strength to sit up, a painful head rush making him gasp softly as he reaches for the bedframe to steady him.   It's so early, far too early to be awake. But he had to finish homework before school so that he could spend more time with Chen tonight.   He'd promised Xiumin.   Kris stirs slightly behind him, turning his head in Tao's direction, a soft sound escaping his lips.   He looks so peaceful while he's sleeping, his chest rising and falling evenly, his nose twitching every once in a while.   Tao reaches over almost gingerly, brushing Kris's hair out of his eyes. It's so soft, his hair.    It's a newly powder grey, a color Tao adored so much on him. So so pretty, his Kris.   He smiles softly at the thought, brushing his thumb gently across the older boy's cheekbones as he stirs slightly, his voice so low that Tao barley hears him,   'Mm.....Tao......'   Tao smiles, bending to press the gentlest of kisses to his boyfriend's forehead before getting soundlessly to his feet and heading for the shower.   The water is cold, but Tao doesn't seem to realize this until he gets out and starts shivering. Not much seemed to bother him anymore.   He dries his hair as best he can and ties a towel around his hips, heading back to his and Kris's room in search of some clothes.   Kris is laying on his back now, one arm thrown over his bare stomach.    So beautiful. Even when he wasn't trying.   Tao retrieves some pants before walking back over to watch his sleeping boyfriend for a moment longer.   He looks so different like this, his lips set in a straight line, his thick eyelashes standing out against his pale skin.    Tao reaches down carefully, running the back of his fingers across Kris's forehead, tucking a stray piece of hair behind his ear.    If only he could stay here forever, watching as his work-of-art-beautiful boyfriend slept.   But all good things, all happiness, all contentment, is fleeting and soon enough, Tao's phone is buzzing from the nightstand.   He reaches hastily to retrieve it, moving across the room quickly and closing the door quietly behind him so as not to wake Kris.   Without looking to see who it is, he presses accept, his voice only a low whisper,   "Hello?"   There's a pause, the soft sounds of breathing and something that sounded unmistakably like crying,   'T-Tao...?'   Tao stands a bit straighter, a few drops of water rolling down his back,   "Baekhyun?? Hey, what's wrong?"   For a moment, all he can hear is Baekhyun's muffled crying, sounding as if he's covering his mouth with his hand,   'Ch-Chanyeol.....he.....he broke up with me....'   Tao feels a flash of anger, the immediate need to kick Chanyeol's making his free hand curl into a fist.   This was supposed to have been a good thing.   Things with Chanyeol and Baekhyun had been going well so they'd decided to spend the weekend alone at a local penthouse Kris's father owned.   Obviously, this hadn't been part of the plan.   Tao adjusts how he's holding his phone, his voice gentler,   "I'm so sorry, Baekhyun....is there anything I can do?"   He can hear Baekhyun breathing, the short gasps making the same familiar anger surge inside of Tao,   'Actually....if you could come pick me up....I....I'm standing outside right now....I can't face him, Tao.....'   Tao nods a few times, realizing how cold it must be and Baekhyun probably isn't dressed properly.   "Hold on, Baek. I'll be there as soon as I can, okay?"   Tao can hear Baekhyun sigh in relief and feels a slight shock as he realizes that Baekhyun must have been assuming he was going to say no.   'Thank you, Tao.....'   Tao only grabs a jacket and Suho's keys, leaving a hastily written note on the fridge as he leaves as quickly and quietly as he can.   It's so early that there is still low fog on the road, Tao's breath making clouds in the cold air, not bothering to roll up the windows as he presses harder on the gas.   No matter what, him and Baekhyun would always be friends and Tao knew that not helping him wasn't an option.   It's almost six when Tao pulls up to the hotel where Chanyeol and Baekhyun had been staying, waving away the valet as he gets to his feet.   He catches sight of Baekhyun almost immediately.   The small dark haired boy is sitting on the curb a few feet away, dressed only in a white tee shirt and pajama pants.    He stands as he catches sight of Tao, a small smile curving his lips despite the tear stains on his cheeks.   Tao makes a soft sound, pulling Baekhyun into his arms with surprising strength, resting his chin on top of the other boy's head almost instinctively.   He's about to ask what happened when he feels the soft touch of Baekhyun's fingers across the bare skin of his chest, a warm shiver coursing through his body as he pulls away.   Baekhyun is looking between Tao's abs and his face, obviously confused about why he'd choose to rescue him shirtless.   Tao blushes a deep red, his voice rather sheepish,   "Oh....I just got out of the shower when you called....."   Baekhyun nods, laughing softly as he glances over Tao's shoulder at his car,   'Can we go?'   Tao blinks a few times, still trying to forget about how it felt to have Baekhyun touch him,   "Oh! Yeah, of course....."   He turns and walks back over to the car, holding open the driver door for Baekhyun, he probably shouldn't drive when he was this tired.    He's about to close it behind him when he hears a shuffling of feet and Chanyeol's deep voice reaches his ears,   'Don't you take another ing step, Tao!! Leave him alone!'   Tao looks up to find a rather disheveled Chanyeol standing a few feet away. His silver hair is messy, his jacket falling off one shoulder.   Tao hardly blinks as he looks him in the eye, Chanyeol, the man who thought it was fine to play with his best friend's heart. The one who cared enough to him, but not enough to take care of him.   Tao rolls his eyes in Chanyeol's direction, forcing a lazy casualness into his voice that he didn't feel,   "Chanyeol....don't you think you've done enough?"   Chanyeol looks angry enough to almost scare Tao, taking a step towards him,   'Baekhyun! You can't-'   Tao holds up a hand to silence Chanyeol, letting all the malice and darkness into his eyes that he can manage,   "Stay away from him....."   Chanyeol takes another few steps forward, his eyes bright with anger,   'And what gives you the right to make decisions for him, eh Tao? Who ing gave you the right?'   Suddenly, the stupidity of the situation hits Tao. And instead of feeling angry, now he just feels tired and sad.   Sad because this kept happening, sad because even though Chanyeol and Baekhyun still loved each other, something was keeping them apart.   Tao had a pretty good idea what that was.   He drops his hand slowly, raising his eyes to Chanyeol's with a sad smile,   "Chan......please......don't make this any harder than it already is, okay? Just let him go....."   Chanyeol doesn't respond, his hands still curled into fists, his eyes blazing,   'He can't do this to me!'   Tao loses his patience, rolling his eyes and dropping his hand and turning to close Baekhyun's door, walking around to the passenger side of the car,   "It's not your decision, Chanyeol...."   Tao glances down at Baekhyun, lowering his voice a bit,   "You okay?"   Baekhyun nods, not looking at him as Tao sends a last glare in Chanyeol's direction and gets into the car, closing the door behind him and handing Baekhyun the keys.   The drive home is quiet, Baekhyun not speaking, his eyes still red and puffy from crying.   Tao clears his throat hesitantly, looking over at him, his voice gentle,   "Baekhyun......what happened?"   Baekhyun doesn't reply at first, his face crumbling slightly as he turns his eyes away,   'He told me that our relationship is too much work....that I want too much from him.....he told me we could keep sleeping together, but that he wanted to cut off the rest of our relationship......'   He trails off and Tao feels a surge of anger at Chanyeol. How could he do this? How could he act like that when he knew how much he meant to Baekhyun?   Tao doesn't reply at first, not sure what he could say that would make his best friend feel any better.    Chanyeol was being a . A big one.    It wasn't like Baekhyun was perfect or that their relationship had always been as #goals as it seemed. But nonetheless, Baekhyun didn't deserve this.   'I just.....I feel so used.....I kept giving him what he wanted because I figured that it was going somewhere, that we were going somewhere....'   He falls silent, the dark shadows around his eyes from smudged eyeliner making his expression seem even more dismal,   'They're right.....I am a .....'   Tao cringes at the word, having it associated with his best friend wasn't something he liked,   "Baekhyun....."   Baekhyun cuts him off, anger and self-loathing filling his dark eyes,   'But it's true! I was easy. I let Chanyeol do whatever he wanted with me because I thought.....I honestly thought.....that he cared about me....'   He pauses for a second, anger flaring in his expression,   'He didn't want me. All he wanted was someone easy he could .....'   Tao doesn't reply, knowing that Baekhyun was probably right but not being able to believe that Chanyeol the just and noble could be capable of something so low.   "I'm sorry, Baekhyun....."   Baekhyun shakes his head, running a hand roughly through his hair.   There's a look on his face that Tao doesn't recognize. It's heartbroken and disgusted, but more than that, it's lonely.   Tao wants to comfort him, to tell him that it was all going to be alright.   But his body feels so heavy, and all he can seem to do is look straight ahead at the road, his words sounding so useless even to his own ears,   "I'm sorry...."   Baekhyun looks up then, his raised voice surprising Tao,   'Sorry for what? Sorry that you're a ty best friend? Sorry that you broke my heart? Sorry that you're so stupid that you can't see what's happening right in front of you?'   The words hurt more than when Baekhyun actually punched him, a cold darkness opening up inside Tao. He was right. But maybe that was why it hurt so much.   Because he hadn't been a very good friend lately. He had broken Baekhyun's heart and seemed unable to stop doing it.    This whole thing was so wrong and Tao had to fix it.    Even if he'd only end up breaking it more.   He stops the car suddenly, veering off the road into the gravel shoulder and hitting the brakes.   He sits there in silence for a moment before gesturing to Baekhyun, his voice smooth and commanding,   "Get out."   He opens his own door then, getting out and waiting for Baekhyun to do the same.   As soon as he does, Tao walks around the car to him, noticing for a moment how much taller than Baekhyun he is.    He reaches for the smaller boy hesitantly, taking his face in his hands with a gentleness he didn't know he possessed.   Baekhyun seems indifferent, holding Tao's gaze as Tao makes a split-second decision and does something he probably shouldn't.   He pulls his body a bit closer to Baekhyun's, tilting his head and fitting their lips together.    As soon as their lips touch, Baekhyun gasps softly, resting his hands flat against Tao's chest and leaning into him.   It feels so right, to be this close to Baekhyun, to be kissing him.   Baekhyun tilts his head, deepening the kiss, the warm touch of his hands making Tao feel like shivering.   It wasn't like he'd intended to kiss Baekhyun, but it didn't seem like a hug would've been enough.    It was a lame excuse even in Tao's mind as he drops his hands to Baekhyun's hips and pushes him up against the car.   Baekhyun doesn't seem to want to pull away, his kisses becoming slower and more deliberate as he eventually gives up and pulls back, resting his forehead against Tao's.   Tao doesn't say anything, pressing his hands against the small of Baekhyun's back and pressing a soft kiss to the side of his neck.   Baekhyun sighs quietly, brushing his fingers gently across Tao's chest,     'So......what now?'   Tao doesn't speak at first, doesn't want to. This felt so wrong, but so right at the same time.   Maybe he'd always belonged with Baekhyun.   Maybe being with Kris had just been a stepping stone on his way to better things.    Tao looks up at Baekhyun, a soft smile curving his lips as he pulls him into another kiss, this one more passionate than before,    "It doesn't matter.....all I want is you....."     Someone is poking Tao's arm. It annoying and he tries to ignore it at first, but they keep doing it and soon, the sunrise landscape and Baekhyun's warmth disappears and Tao wakes up.    The first thing he realizes is that Baekhyun is looking at him, his dark eyes slightly concerned,   'Tao? Are you okay?'   Tao realizes they're both still in the car and looks over at Baekhyun, arching a lone eyebrow in his direction,   "What happened?"   Baekhyun looks just as confused as Tao feels, his voice slow and careful,   'You picked me up from the hotel, remember? You seemed really sleepy so I told you I'd drive....you fell asleep.....'   Tao blinks a few times, not remembering anything.    Except kissing Baekhyun. That he remembered.    But it hadn't been real.    It had felt real.   Tao still remembered the feel of Baekhyun's lips against his, the gentle brush of his fingers, how small he'd seemed.    But it wasn't real. He had to forget about it.   Him and Baekhyun would never be a couple.    Tao pulls himself out of his thoughts, sending a sheepish smile in Baekhyun's direction,   "Sorry about falling asleep...."   Baekhyun doesn't respond, pulling the keys out of the ignition and dropping them into Tao's hand,   'Thanks for picking me up.....'   Tao nods, not feeling very useful. He wasn't sure when he'd fallen asleep, probably sometime after Baekhyun had stopped talking about him and Chanyeol.   Had he really gotten angry at Tao? Everything seemed a bit blurry now and Tao didn't want to ask Baekhyun about it.   Baekhyun leans over to kiss Tao on the cheek, his voice soft,   'I'm lucky to have a friend like you Tao....