At home you threw your purse on the coffee table and curled into a ball on the sofa.  You sort of felt numb after what happened-- you broke up with Yoongi!  

It was something you never thought you would ever do.  In the course of you relationship with him, he had grown increasingly jealous and you admit to yourself that "misunderstandings" and arguments between you have become more frequent;  but you always thought that you would be able to endure it until such time that Yoongi feels more secure about your relationship.  You always thought your relationship just needed more time to mature.

Following you like you were a criminal under probation is bad enough, but acting up in front of people you respected and loved, that has got to be the icing on the breakup cake.  You still can't believe he can do something like that.

Your thoughts were interrupted by the ringing of the doorbell.  It could only be either Yoongi or Jongin- the two people you don't want to see yet;  so you ignored the tinkling sound and hugged a throw pillow tighter.  The person kept ringing the doorbell and then started banging on the door when no response came.

"______, it's Yoongi.  Let me in."

You ignored him.

"I know you're in there. Can we just talk? I'm not leaving until I see you," he insisted.  You tried to block off his voice with a pillow covering your ears but failed.  After a few minutes of his continued presence outside your door, you decided to finally talk to him.  You reasoned that you eventually have to talk anyway.

He enveloped you into a hug the moment you opened the door, but your arms stayed limp by your side.  When he started to kiss your cheek, you pushed him away gently.

"You said you just want to talk," you told him dully.

You walked over to the sofa and motioned for him to sit down, too.  He paused for a moment, but then refused to sit. He started to pace back and forth in front of you.

"You have a right to be mad. I acted rashly and I'm sorry," he started.  "But can you please look at it through my point of view?  You're practically on a date with your ex-boyfriend and his parents were eagerly matching you up! As your boyfriend, I can't just stay quiet on the side.  What was I supposed to do?"

"You were supposed to trust me, Yoongi.  Did you really think that just because his parents wanted it, I'll get back together with Jongin?"

Yoongi ran his hands through his hair, still pacing. "I don't want to take that chance!  What kind of man would allow opportunities for his girl's ex to steal her back?"

"Only in your mind, Yoongi! He knows I have a boy friend and he already said he just wanted to be friends again."  

"Men say all sorts of things to get into a girl's pants," Yoongi, now agitated, stopped in front of you and sat on his haunches.  "You think too nicely of people that you can't see it!"

"And you think the worst in people!"

"I just want to protect what's mine!" Yoongi forcefully said.

You were silent for a few moments, studying his face, normally beautiful but now tinged with the darkness of anger.  Then, with a deep sigh, you said, "Maybe that's the problem, Yoongi.  You think I'm an object you own instead of a human being who can think for herself."

Yoongi just gaped at you, his mouth opening and closing, as if he's trying to say something but words won't come out.  You shook your head and stood up to open the door. 

"Please leave." you said. 

Yoongi stood up and walked to your side.  "____-ah, that's not true. I think of you as a person--  the most important person in my life."

"Yoongi, until you learn to trust me and control your jealousy, there won't be a future for us. You see that, don't you?" you said, voice so low you were almost whispering, as your mouth speaks the words that your mind has only started to accept as true.

Yoongi grimaced, and moved his hand as if to touch your cheek. But he lowered it down before making contact and left without another word,

You closed the door and sank to the floor.

****

The following day, after a fretful, sleepless night, you were drinking a cup of coffee when your phone rang.  The caller ID showed it was your boss, the head stylist, Seolhoon, calling.  

"Hi Seolhoon-oppa," you greeted him.

"____-ah. I heard you and Yoongi broke up. Are you okay?" he said without preamble.

"How did you hear about it?" you asked, surprised people have heard of it that early.

"Well, most of the staff here are talking about it.  It seems Yoongi trashed the recording studio last night and word is that it's because you broke up with him."

"What?!" you said, surprise evident in your voice.  You thought about all the expensive equipment they use to produce songs and winced.

"Namjoon was so mad, I can tell you." Seolhoon said.  "But enough of that.  What's more important is- are you okay?"

"I'm okay, Seolhoon, thanks for asking." you replied. 

"But will you be okay at work?" he asked again.

His question gave you pause.  You haven't fully come to terms with your breakup and you haven't thought about how you're going to see him almost everyday at work.  You ran your hand through your hair in frustration.  

"Not yet, but I will be, Seolhoon.  I know we have busy days ahead of us and I don't want to leave you and the team in the lurch right before a BTS comeback."

"You can take a few days off if you like. We can manage for the time being."

You sighed gratefully. "Thank you, Seolhoon. But I don't want to incovenience the team.  I'll come to work per usual tomorrow."

"Call me if you need help, someone to talk to. Okay?" he said, before ringing off.

You put down the phone and stared ahead. How on earth are you going to see Yoongi everyday without breaking down?

Last night, you kept thinking and thinking if you've made the right decision.  But seeing as how your relationship with Yoongi cannot go on as it was, you feel like you didn't really have a choice.  Remembering the events of yesterday, you picked up your phone again to apologize to Jongin's parents.

*****

You came to work early the next day because BTS is having a photo-shoot for their comeback teasers.  Before entering the studio, you braced yourself and breathed in and out several times.  

"Noona," a voice called you.  You turned around and found Namjoon walking towards you.

"Namjoon, I'm so sorry for the other night," you said, referring to Yoongi's tantrum in their recording studio.

"Not your fault, noona.  Yoongi-hyung should have expended his anger in a different way, but I guess he wasn't thinking straight."

"Was there a lot of damage?" you asked.

"Well, a couple of equipment.  But nothing that can't be fixed.  Good thing Hobi has a separate set we can use, given by ARMY on his birthday.  We need to buy a new chair though coz he threw the old one against the wall.  Broke a mini-surfboard we had on display," he replied.  "Come, let's go in." 

He opened the door and let you in first.  You walked inside and the first person you see is Yoongi, staring straight at you, as if he waswaiting for you to come in throguh the door. You averted your gaze and greeted everyone with a bow.  Then you went to your makeup station and arranged your brushes and makeup palettes, waiting for the first member to sit.

When someone sat on the makeup chair, you looked up.  Of course, it had to be Yoongi.  

You looked at him and unconsciously bit your lip at your discomfort at being face to face with him.  His eyes, which were trying to lock in with yours, looked down to your lips and he let out a huge sigh.  Thankfully he didn't say anything and just let you do your work.  But he kept his eyes on you the whole time and it took all your effort to prevent your hand from shaking.  When you were done with his makeup, he stoop up and muttered, "Thanks." then walked off.  You didn't know if you were relieved or disappointed.

The rest of the week pretty much were the same as that first day.  Yoongi kept his conversation with you at a minimum but his eyes always searched for you when you were both in the same room.  The other BTS members tried to act normal, joking around  and attempting to lighten the mood, but the atmosphere still felt uncomfortable.  The members were all tense not knowing how to act in front of you and Yoongi. 

Taehyung, in a moment of tactlessness, joked about how Yoongi and you should just get back together since you can't stop from looking at each other anyway.  Yoongi was immediately on him, grabbing his shirt with his fist and pushing the younger man against the wall.  The other members rushed to break the fight before punches start flying. 

In the past few days, you have been debating with yourself if you should just quit your job to ease the tension in the studio.  The almost-fight between Yoongi and Taehyung decided it for you.  So that afternoon, after you've packed up for the day, you talked to Seolhoon and informed him of your decision to leave.  

He wasn't blind to the what was happening so he reluctantly agreed with your decision.  It wasn't a good time to leave but he assured you he can get somebody to help out the team during the comeback and that you should not worry about your fellow stylists- just think of yourself, take a little time off, away from Yoongi.

You thanked him profusely and walked out of the Bighit office building, probably for the last time in your life.

***********

To be continued. 

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