**Author's note:

Paragraphs in italics with YBM initial at the end is from Bomi's note inside the book.

5 February 2008

I stood in front of her room in that cold aired hospital. I could see the glimpse of her trough the small glass peek on the door. I was on the verge of cry again. I bit my lower lip close to bleed hoping it will transfer the pain inside my chest into physical sting. It’s better that way.
 

 I really want to run my feet into the room  and place her in my embrace so tight at that very moment. But I was scared if she doesn’t want me at all.  What if she doesn’t trust me and my feeling? What if she really doesn’t love me?
 

The same questions were constantly roaming inside my brain. The tears occasionally begged to fall down and I let them each time.
In the end, I just left and dragged the pain along with me after all the battles with my own self.

YBM

Earlier of the day

Bomi POV
It’s been 3 days since I last saw her and hell yes, part of me tried to avoid her at any cost. I was such a pathetic fool thinking that I could handle this broken heart. But I realized that the most excruciating part was not at the point of breaking but when you cut yourself trying to pick up the shattered pieces.
I’ve got to stop this madness.
Buzzing sound came out from my phone.A phone call it was.

I want to ignore it as I didn’t feel like to connect myself to reality at this moment, but looking at the caller’s name, I changed my mind. I put it near to my ear, "Dae Eunji."

“Yah Bomi! Where are you? Why did you skipped the last class? I was damn worried you know? Now give me your location, I’ll come. You owe me an explanation." A short nag from Eunji.

“I'm at the school field, you know our usual hang out spot after training session,” I answered shortly.

“Okay wait for me.” Eunji replied and she hung up.

Eunji was my best friend since we both enter the high school. We both were school field track athletes. I was a sprinter and Eunji was more talented in long distance running. We shared each other secrets and practically sisters.

I was sitting on the bench when I felt a hand slightly hit my shoulder. I look up and saw Eunji. She took the sit beside me. “Thinking about her again?” Eunji asked.

I just nodded, trying to hide my despair. But not for long. I started to tear up. “I can’t forget her or my damn feeling. I cannot move on," my voice cracked.

Eunji patted my back, sending signal that she was supporting me.

“I do love Chorong unni, so much. I was hoping that she would come that day. But she didn’t” I continued. I recalled the incidence of 3 days ago.

Bomi’s flashback
 

I was about to do my usual Monday routine before class which was to greet my one and only crush in front of her classroom.
 

As I was getting nearer to my destination, something stopped my pace and my breath altogether. It was her, holding hand with a guy, talking and smiling with him near the wall. Suddenly I felt like a devil took control over my body as I walked towards them. I stopped, now facing her and her blank face.
 

I couldn’t think straight at the moment. Subconsciously I took her right wrist and firmly said,”Chorong unni, come with me”. I dragged her to a secluded hallway. I let go her wrist and turned my back, now looking at Chorong's dark brown orbs.
 

“Yoon Bomi, w..what are you doing? Chorong asked with a low voice, almost  whispering.
 

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, trying to gather my thou