It was a cloudy day, just like the mood demanded, there was no sun peeking out from behind a cloud, and there was no warm breeze flowing through the air, just a chilly one that asked for a coat even if it was summertime.

All the members of EXO were dressed in a dark suit, faces washed up and fresh looking, as they stepped inside the graveyard, silently, trailing up behind one another to reach the place where Shin Chunja’s little and very young body was going to find its last home.

Most of the members didn’t even knew the little girl personally and neither Sehun, despite seeing her with Baekhyun a lot of times, but Jongdae and Baekhyun knew her and they had cared for her, she was important to them therefore they had all agreed to attend the funeral and pay a last tribute to the little angel.

It had been two days since they had heard the news and the state of the two tiny members of the beagle line had been saddening all of them; both men had turned into quiet versions of themselves, which had alarmed everyone, although they were quite different as well, Jongdae sometimes grew angry at the situation and he was either sad and crying or throwing things to the floor and punching walls. Sehun had actually heard Kris talking to Kyungsoo, who was worried at the other’s behavior, and told him that it was better to vent out his emotions out than letting them consume him. That had made him all the more concerned about the other midget hyung since Baekhyun was very quiet, rarely talked about it and pretended that everything was fine; it was staring at a shadow version of the feisty little hyung he knew. It was unsettling, to say the least, and Sehun just wanted his hyung back to normal.

They all sat down on the chairs designated to them, which a nice young man, most likely one that had had dealt with the preparations of the funeral, had pointed out. There were two rows for them. Jongdae sat in the back, next to Junmyeon and Kyungsoo, both boys supporting him. Jongdae himself had his head resting on Junmyeon’s shoulder; Tao was on Junmyeon’s other side, sniffling and grabbing the leader’s hand tightly, while the other grabbed Yixing’s. Chanyeol was silent and quiet and from time to time he would put his chin on Baekhyun’s shoulder, who sat in front of him. Baekhyun sat between Kris and Sehun, who had been coerced by Junmyeon’s glare. Minseok, Luhan and Jongin sat near them.

There were already people sitting and some of them were pointing and staring at them but none of them seemed to mind about it, it didn’t matter anyway. Not to them, anyways.

Sehun heard a slight gasp coming from Baekhyun as he stood up and walked up to an old lady. The old lady was sobbing hard and even more so as she saw the younger man walking up in their direction.

“That’s Chunja’s grandmother” explained Jongdae with a tired voice. “I’ve heard that Chunja’s mother isn’t coming, she is having a really hard time since Chunja’s death, she’s even at the hospital and Chunja’s father is with her. He may be here later but I doubt it.”

The older woman embraced Baekhyun tightly and the boy gently squeezed her back, both sobbing and gasping for air. They talked for a while, both with tears on their faces while the woman patted Baekhyun affectionately on the cheek. They approached them and Chunja’s grandmother thanked all of them until her eyes fell into Sehun.

“I know you, you are that boy that donate his blood for Chunja, aren’t you? I really appreciated your effort and it was really helpful but God made it his will to take her next to Him. And while it is a sad, very sad thing, at least I rest assured that she is no longer suffering.”

Sehun could see, from the corner of his eye, Baekhyun’s head snapping in his direction while Jongdae lifted his head from Junmyeon’s shoulder.

“It is really a blessing to have such kind hearted young men like you and I hope that God may continue to bless such people as you; as Baekhyunnie who, despite being a famous person and working a lot, he still manages to have time for this. We might be just regular common people and we have got nothing to offer you but for us, it means the world. So thank you.”

The elderly lady squeezed his hands and returned to her seat, Baekhyun helping her to reach her seat before returning to them and sitting in his chairs, wiping at his cheeks very quietly.

The funeral had been beautiful and heartbreaking, the words that had been uttered by everyone had been beautiful but, for some reason, to Sehun, they were all just the same cliché answers that everyone gave in times like this. That is until Baekhyun stood up and, as they say, took the stage

“Good morning, my name is Byun Baekhyun. When Halmoni asked me to do this I really thought about saying no; what could I say to you in this precise moment? What can I say to lighten up hearts that are in pain? What do you say when you are choking with grievance? Then I realized that you can’t! There is nothing that you can say to help someone who is suffering so much; there is nothing you can ever say to someone who is dealing with loss. There is no truth in time heals all because it doesn’t, the only thing time does is allow you to remember. That being said, I won’t talk about loss, because there isn’t truly loss as long as we remember and allow ourselves to remember. I will talk about Shin Chunja, the little girl who I met in the children’s ward at the local hospital. She was this little teeny tiny thing with big eyes and a sweet smile. She was dancing the first time that I ever saw her, like a little fairy leaping gracefully through the wind. I never really quite understand why these kids, who had the most life threatening diseases, could be so happy, the only thing they needed was be alive and the world was theirs, the rest didn’t matter; it didn’t matter if they were dying, it didn’t matter how much it hurt or even that they couldn't do much due to the pills or the stitches covering some part of their body, as long as they dreamt. That was all that matter. And a dreamer she was. She saw the beauty in everything and she taught me great things about myself, about the importance of being true to yourself despite your many flaws, despite everybody else screaming at you to do better. The rest doesn’t really matter that much, as long as you are happy and honest. We used to talk together and she told me her biggest dream was to be a dancer, which is quite obvious since she fluttered around everywhere like a pretty ballerina and I used to lament the fact that I am a singer not a dancer, but she didn’t mind, she said she would dance for the both of us and I could sing and that was that, no complications! She was like a little sister to me and it was painful to watch as she started to degenerate because of her illness, I really think that that is the worst and it was what affected me the most, watching her life fade away from her. But the most spectacular thing was seeing her smile everyday despite everything, bright with unadulterated joy. And that was the upmost important thing that she thaught me: to dream and enjoy life to the fullest because it all can be taken away from you in a second. And that is what I’ll do; I will continue to honor her memory doing so. I hope I can make her proud, I hope that I can teach others what she taught me tand inspire them as she inspired me but most of all I hope that she continues to shine wherever she is right now. Thank you.”

And his tiny hyung, Baekhyun, left the stage, crying heavily by now, as everyone else, and sat on his chairs, almost falling if not by him and Kris who reached out to grab him. The words had been beyond beautiful and Sehun really did think that the meaning behind them was the most raw and stripped out that Baekhyun had ever been, which had surprise him and made him see that his hyung was more guarded than he had assumed. It had made him realize that Baekhyun was a book that he hadn’t read as well as he thought; there was more to him than everyone knew. Quietly, without drawing too much attention, Sehun picked a tissue from his pocket and handed it to Baekhyun, who looked at him with surprised, red, puffy eyes.

“Thank you!” mumbled his hyung accepting the tissue timidly.

“You’re welcome.” replied Sehun turning his attention to the next person who stood up to talk.

After the speeches, all the EXO members stood up, when they heard the news and Jongdae and Baekhyun had explained them what happened, they had all agreed to pay a last homage to the little girl, singing her favorite song: Peter Pan. Jongdae and Baekhyun tried to sing the whole song but, sometimes, due to their emotional state it was proved to be impossible, leading the other members to sing their parts for them and when the coffin was finally lowered down into the ground, both boys couldn’t stop sobbing. All of them had waited for Baekhyun and Jongdae to say goodbye to Chunja’s grandmother before leaving and both of them almost had to be supported to the cars; they both sat together, huddled together, seeking comfort in each other. They were inhumanely quiet, looking out the window.

As soon as they got to the dorms, since manager hyung had conceded to let them have the day off, Kyungsoo immediately took Jongdae to the kitchen to make him tea; somehow both of them had managed to return to their previous relationship, albeit with caution, while Kyungsoo and Baekhyun were not the same as they were much to Jongdae’s frustration. Baekhyun however had slipped himself from Tao’s embrace to seek solace in his room. No one seemed to notice though because Tao had erupted in tears, babbling about something in mandarin, sending them all into frenzy when he almost hyperventilated.

Eventually, they all had calmed down, meaning that Luhan had almost slap the younger to get him to breathe while Chanyeol panicked, Minseok tried to calm Chanyeol down and Yixing translated to everybody. Right now Tao was sleeping soundly, head pillowed on Yixing’s lap and feet resting on Junmyeon’s. Only then Sehun seemed to notice that Kris and Jongin were not in the room anymore so, naturally, he decided to search them right on the place he knew they would be: the beagle line room.

He climbed up the stairs and knocked slightly on the door before entering, not even waiting for anyone to acknowledge him, and there they were; Kris was sitting the bed, back against the headboard, while Baekhyun laid in the bed, sleeping peacefully on top of his legs, red, puffy eyes obvious to anyone who’d look at him, while Jongin slept too, snuggled up to Baekhyun’s back, arms tightly wrapped against the smaller’s waist.

“Why are you here?” asked Kris in a low tone of voice while looking at him.

“Came to see where you were hiding.”

“Don’t lie; you came to check on Baekhyun.”

“Did I say I wasn’t?” asked Sehun raising an eyebrow to the older man. “Yes, I did come to check him up; he’s been too quiet it’s unsettling and, as strange as it sounds, it is also very abnormal and I want him back to normal.”

“Define normal?”

“Normal as in hyper little puppy who yaps at everything that moves and then some; normal as in the midget who smiles at everything even if they’re bricks and hit him in the face and I also want the normal hyung who, and I hate to admit it, is very concerned about everyone and dots on them, such as the lazy currently attached to the hobbit, and everything else too.”

“That was very descriptive of you, glad to know you appreciate his smile and voice and ... everything else.”

“It is much better than watching him all gloomy and quiet…it’s just not right for some reason.”

“Yeah, for some reason” interjected Kris with a snort “You are dumb maknae, so dumb.”

“Hyung what’s going on?”

They both looked at Jongin who had somewhat woken up and was looking at Kris with inquisitive eyes.

“Nothing, if you’re tired you should go have a nap on your bed Jongin. Come on, I’ll take you there and even tuck you in!”

Jongin nodded quickly, loving the idea of being babied by his hyung; it was an unspoken rule in the dorms that Junmyeon was their mom while Kris was the dad, when they were separated, doing their own schedules as a subunit, read EXO-K and EXO-M, the kids, Tao, Chanyeol and Jongin, since Kyungsoo and Sehun wouldn’t be caught dead in that list, would miss their other parent badly, hence the reason while Tao spent a lot of time with Junmyeon and Chanyeol and Jongin trailed like little ducklings behind Kris. So, naturally, having Kris saying that he would tuck Jongin was exciting to the younger boy. However, he seemed to hesitate a bit.

“What about Baekhyunnie hyung? He’ll wake up and be alone.”

“Don’t worry! Sehun, come here!”

“Why?” asked the maknae suspiciously.

“Because I told you to; come here!”

Sehun approached the bed cautiously and sat when Kris asked him to do so; then, when he saw it there was a cuddly Baekhyun sleeping on his leg, after being rolled over by Kris.

“See Jongin? Now Baekhyunnie is still sleeping and won’t be alone!” announced Kris completely ignoring the withering glare that Sehun laid upon him. “Come on now little one, let’s go take a nap!”

“You’ll take a nap with me Kris hyung?”

“Yes, I will. Today was just too emotional for me. We are all tired and a nap before lunch sounds amazing!” answered Kris, passing a hand through is face.

He led Jongin to the door by the shoulder and when he was just about to close the door, he whispered to Sehun.

“If you’re so interested in having him smiley and ‘Baekhyunnie’ again, do something for it, here’s your chance!”

“Go to hell!” replied Sehun with gritted teeth.

Kris let out a cackle before closing the door and he continued to do so for a long time, leading a confused Jongin to his bedroom.

Sehun stared at the pint sized man on his lap; the man was tired it was obvious by the bags under his eyes and the faint lines on his forehead as he frown even in his sleep. The long lashes were resting on his cheeks and he breathed evenly through his parted lips, hands curled quite adorably in front of his face. Sehun admitted to himself that he found the sight to be really cute. He gently let a hand trace the frowning lines on the other’s forehead, smoothing them out, and Baekhyun made a noise on the back of his throat before nuzzling closer to the source of warmth, letting a little smile dance on the corners of his lips.

“What am I doing with you?” asked with Sehun staring at Baekhyun, not realizing he was carding through Baekhyun’s silky hair, until a few second into it, withdrawing his hand as fast as he could. “And what are you doing to me?”

When Sehun woke up again, which was a surprise since he hadn’t realized he had fallen asleep, there was a pair of dark eyes watching him, and precisely where he had left them.

“Hi.” said Baekhyun in voice soft, probably due to lack of usage.

“What time is it?”

“Nearing four in the afternoon. Yixing hyung was here earlier with food but I think that if I moved you would wake up.”

“So you didn’t eat at all?” asked Sehun, eyebrows shooting up in surprise when the other shook his head. He sighed deeply before raising up from the bed, almost succeeding in making Baekhyun topple from the bed. He took his hyung’s hand within his and pulled him along to the kitchen.

“Sit!” he commanded, letting go of the other’s hand and going to the pot on the stove in hopes to reheat the food in there. While the food was reheating he set the table for himself and his hyung. He put some food on the plate and sat next to Baekhyun eating. However, the silence in the room was making him borderline insane; he wanted his hyung to say something and not stare at the plate, moving food along, puffy eyes focused solely on the fork moving the food.

“Where is everyone?” he asked, trying to get the other to speak.

“Jongdae’s out with Kyungsoo, Jongin, Tao, Junmyeon hyung and Duizhang are sleeping, Yixing hyung and Chanyeol are in hyung’s room composing and Minseok hyung and Luhan hyung went out to play soccer.”

“And how you know that?”

“Yixing hyung told me.”

“And do you know where Jongdae is?”

“Out.”

“Where?”

“I don’t know!”

“Will you stop that and start to talk properly?” screamed Sehun, beyond frustrated at the other’s behavior. Baekhyun was looking at him inquisitively.

“What did I do?”

“You don’t talk! You don’t smile! You are behaving like a goddamn ghost and it’s affecting everyone; every single one of us. Whether you like it or not, you are the mood maker, we feed off your energy, if you’re sad we’re all moody and don’t know what to do, when you’re happy everyone is brighter. I get that you’re upset and that you are grieving but please don’t hold it all in, scream, cry, shout, anything but this apathy, you are worrying all of us and it’s weird…just…please.”

Baekhyun was staring at him, calm eyes staring at him, head resting on his palm, looking serene, as if Sehun hadn’t just shouted in his face.

“Sehun, do you realize that I am a human being and that I can’t switch the emotion that will please you the most whenever you want me too. I am sad and I’m mourning right now because a four year child I knew and loved was buried today.” He spoke in a quiet voice and it was obvious that he wasn’t trying to rile Sehun up or even arguing with him. “I’m tired and I am allowed to be tired and scared and gutted and you all need to allow me to have this moment to myself. I can’t promise I’ll be fine tomorrow, or that I’ll just randomly start telling jokes; things don’t work like that. I will get there eventually, just let me deal with these things.”

“You know you can talk with us, don’t you?”

“I know.”

They’ve both continued to eat, or at least Sehun continued while Baekhyun was now starting. From his peripheral vision, Sehun could see the little midget lifting up the fork to his lips but pausing in his actions turning to Sehun.

“I wanted to thank you. Once again.”

“What for?” asked Sehun a little curious.

“I never knew you donated blood to help Chunja. And I am feeling so guilty that I’ve punched you once for following me to the hospital. I hope that you can forgive me, for punching you, for not acknowledge your gesture and for saying all the crap I said to you.” said the other looking directly into Sehun’s eyes.

“It’s okay. I would be mad if I was in your shoes.” replied the maknae.

“I’m sorry!” repeated Baekhyun.

“It’s fine, don’t stress about it. You can pack a pretty good punch.”

“That’s hapkido for you.” he answered with a small smile and never in his life did Sehun felt so proud of himself. He contemplated the other’s beautiful face as he seemed pensive, only to look at him a few seconds later. “I’ve never asked you how you felt about Chunja’s death. I’m sor…”

“Don’t say you’re sorry; your mind and your heart are still healing, as you’ve stated before, and rightfully so.” Sehun interrupted before the other could apologize and before that apology could make his stomach twist a little more “I’m mostly okay. I felt sorry that she was a child going through such hardships, especially being that young, but I didn’t know her, not like you did. I think not even Jongdae knew her in the same level that you did. You knew what made her smile, what made her laugh, how to comfort her. I knew nothing of her. I’m nothing trying to be mean, but the situation itself was harder for me because of what it represented rather the person.”

“I get what you are trying to say. You feel sad but it’s not the same as if you knew her.”

“Exactly; to tell the truth, I was more worried about you and Jongdae than everything. It was cruel how she was just ripped away from you and all you caring.”

Baekhyun opened his mouth to say something but in that moment Jongin burst into the kitchen, complaining to Baekhyun that Tao was in the bathroom and wouldn’t come out and he really needed to go.

“Aren’t other people you could bother with that?” asked Sehun a little mad that Jongin had interrupted his conversation with his hyung; he was enjoying the conversation and the company, probably for th e first time, and the other just had to ruin it.

“I tried to, but everyone is either sleeping or they are locked in their room, as in Yixing and Chanyeol hyung.”

“Okay, okay! I’m coming.” said Baekhyun amused by their antics.

“Yes! Come on hyung! I’ll lead the way.” yelled Jongin running out from the room.

“That nap did him wonders!” commented the older loftily standing up from his seat.

As Baekhyun bypassed him, Sehun pulled the other by the wrist making stop.

“When you smile, the world gets a little bit brighter, so please, mourn what you have to mourn and allow us to see it again.” he whispered, completely embarrassed, not looking into the smaller’s eyes.

Baekhyun let a smile rise to his lips and cradled Sehun’s face in his hands surprising the younger.

“I will. I promise.” he whispered back adding a little soft kiss to Sehun’s forehead.

If Baekhyun didn’t heard Sehun’s heart thumping faster and loudly against his ribcage, Sehun certainly didn’t see the dark blush that stained his hyung’s cheeks.

“What is this feeling?” asked the maknae to himself, while alone, when his heartbeat returned to its normal rhythm.

A/N: Another chapter done! After death comes funeral. Do you see how Sehun is starting to change his attitude towards Baekhyun? He's precious isn't he? Well, they both are! I really hope that you guys like this chapter and that you continue to support it by voting, commenting and subscribing.
A big, big, biiiiiig thanks to all of you, joined with a tight hug with lots of love and may you have an amazing day!