MEMOIR OF HER

(A.K.A MESMERIZING HER)

(A.K.A THE TRUTH)

(A.K.A THE MOST BEAUTIFUL DAY OF MY LIFE)

(A.K.A SOMEWHERE OUT OF THE APARTMENT)

(A.K.A IF ONLY I KNEW)

 

 

PROFILE:

Amber. 25 years old (Job? imagine whatever you want)

Krystal Jung. 24 years old (Job? imagine whatever you want)

Cameo : Victoria (fx) (Job? imagine whatever you want)

 

PLOT-SETTING:

Too lazy describe it. You’ll find out when you finish read it. Just kidding (HOHOHOHO)

The Profile, plot-setting, my bluffing note are my signature in MOMENT STORY (HOHOHO. Bear with it, next time).

This chapter mostly, I write in male’s perception.

The plot:

Amber and Krystal have been in 5 years relationship. They are already living together (like my common chapter)

One night, They start to fight. What’s actually going on with their relationship?

The setting:

Amber’s Apartment and Somewhere out of the apartment (but this time you can’t imagine like usual, start to imagine when you read that part. HOHOHO).

Late night till morning. Friday till Saturday.

 

THE BLUFFING NOTE: 

- prepare tissue guys (HOHOHOHO. JUST KIDDING)

- The blue word : Imagine! okay? what you say or think while you read it, is Krystal thought about it. Don't mess up with that part of the moment guys. I count on you

- No offense! but i'm not really into K-pop. just look on randomly. I just find the great song (English lyrics) from my friend, put on 2 AM - This song while you read the blue word. HOHOHO

 

JUST INFORM (NOTE: UPDATE APRIL 11, 2015)

I already make the extended story for chapter 6. But I move it out. If you already decide the ending, stop to read it. Don’t continue to read the extended version. By the way, sorry. I put subscribe label for the extended version since I firmly, plot as one shot. Thanks. 

Extended story Link: 

http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/932045/if-only-they-knew-a-k-a-memoir-of-her-explicit-the-extended-version-amber-krystal-krystaljung-victoriasong-kai-kimjoinginkaiexo

 

 

HERE’S THE MOMENT,

 

Friday, 10 pm. Amber’s Apartment.

She doesn’t know what to do any more. Her heart beat rapidly insane. Tears are over flowing from her eyes. Her face, her cheek, her eyes, her lips are soaked. But all she can do just sits on the floor. She stares at Amber who is still beating the wall with his fist. Throwing all the stuff that he can grab. He is kicking everything in front of him. He is shouting whatever words on his mind. He shows his emotion in action.

Afterwards, amber sits on the other corner hopelessly. He bends his leg in front his chest, embraces with his own arm. Puts head low, doesn’t look at krystal. Blood slightly falls down from his hand. Krystal looks straight to him, frozen. She knows that it is the ending.

Amber places his palm to cover his face. Inhales deeply, then places his hand in front of his mouth, and thumbs support the chin. He lets out the deepest breath for today. He looks at Krystal who is shiver, caused by the tears. He knows that he isn’t the only one who is hurt.

The sorrow feeling is surrounded them.

Glass, plate, vas, astray, and lot of stuff are crashed into pieces. Chair is broken. The TV, sofa, table are unplaced. The apartment is already in mess, totally mess. There’s no sound for a while. Amber breaks the silent.

“Don’t hold the tears Krys.” Amber says desperately.

She cracks the tears, starts to cry again. She tries hardly to hold the cry, but at this time, can’t hold it anymore. She puts her left hand on the floor, supporting her body while the other hand covers her eyes. She is sobbing.

Amber slowly closes his eyes. Leans his head on the wall. Trying to feel the pain from Krystal’s sound. Deep in his heart, he can’t stand to hear it. Tears slightly fall from his eyes too without any sound. Both of them stay silent, only crying is heard.

 

Friday, 11 pm. Amber’s Apartment.

Amber stands up, walking toward Krystal. He hugs her tightly. Krystal doesn’t move, spotted in her position.

“I don’t want to waste the rest of our time in fight. Reminds this as the beautiful day of your life.” He whispers to her ear. She nods and buries her face to his neck. She hugs him, tighter than Amber, still sobbing.

 

Friday, 11.15 pm. Amber’s Apartment.

Both of them already sit down on the sofa that already mess. Krystal puts an alcohol on his hand. Amber slightly moves his hand, feels a bit shock in pain.

“Hold on Stupid.” Krystal says softly and smiles.

He grumbles childishly, “Still, it is hurt Krys.”

Krystal smiles, slightly hit his chest. She whispers seriously, “Don’t do that again when I’m not around. Can’t see you in pain.”

Amber nods and smiles bitter.

Krystal grabs the bandage, wraps Amber’s hand. Krystal takes care the wound while Amber is staring at her. He is mesmerizing every detail in Krystal.

He is still staring at Krystal, doesn’t want to miss every single detail of the gorgeous creature in his life. He puts sorrowing smiles on his face. Facing that it will be his last change to memorize all of it.

 

Saturday, 00.15 pm. Amber’s Apartment.

“Why you smile like that Stupid?”

“What?” He answers. Just waking up from his illusion.

Krystal sighs and rolls her eyes, “I finish take care your wound.”

Amber chuckled. He just realizes that his hand is already covered by bandage.

“What’s wrong with you?” Krystal shrinks her forehead.

“Nothing.” He gives Krystal his best smile when his heart is actually in worst.

He manages to stable, “Are you tired?”

“Nope! Why?” she says.

“Thought, tomorrow… uhm… I mean today, you have to….” Krystal cuts off with her finger presses in his lips.

“Don’t dare to say it, Stupid!” she says seriously and sends her signature dead glare. “You say that it will be the most beautiful day for me, us. Don’t try to ruin it.”

Amber chuckled when she uses her dead glare.

He lies on the couch and pulls Krystal. Krystal lies on the couch while her head on Amber’s chest. He takes a deep breath and Krystal feels it. She really hard holds on her tears for the umpteenth. She doesn’t want to make Amber sad.

“Okay my dearest princess. Let’s talk. How?” he says while asking for agreement.

Krystal chuckled and answers, “What we talk about?

“Anything. Story, Question, something that we don’t know. Maybe?”

Krystal replies chicly, “After all, you already know me well.”

Amber lets out the laugh, which is forced. Krystal knows it but manages to reply in smile, which is forced too. 

Both of them are broken heart. But that’s not what their want. They know it.

“Okay, what do you want to know about me?” Amber says while his right hand hugs Krystal and pu the other hand on his back head.

Krystal thinks, “What do you love the most from me?”

Amber makes a facial expression that he’s seemed thinking hard. “Are you making fun of me? Do you want to dead?” Krystal treats him, shooting her dead glare.

Amber laughs, “Okay. Uhm... I don’t think I have one. It’s the hardest question I thought.” Krystal smacks his chest.

“Your nose! It is really something for me when you sneeze.” Krystal stares at him unbelievable. In the deepest heart, he has his own answer.

“Okay, my turn. Describe Amber in 5 words.” He says with his dorky smile.

“Dorky, stupid, uhm… love Krystal Jung!” she answers excited. Amber frowns in fake. She laughs. He answers it too on his mind.

Krystal thinks, “first love?”

“Girl from our campus. I look at her for the first time at library. But, at that time, she isn't interested at me. At that time I didn’t have courage to ask her name.” He answers casually. Krystal looks little bit disappointed. “But I do love you now, right?” He chuckled, He hold the truth.

Krystal smiles widely and hugs Amber.

 

Saturday, 02.00 pm. Amber’s Apartment.

Both of them remind silent. Krystal hears Amber’s heart. She decides to make a move. She kisses amber’s neck, Amber still silent. She moves on top of him. It is lie if he doesn’t want it. In fact, just softly touch from his girlfriend already make him turn on like usual. But, at this state, he feels it doesn’t seem right.

“Krys, I don’t…”

Krystal cuts off Amber’s word with her lips. She kisses but amber still silent. Then Krystal stops the kiss and stares at Amber.

“Don’t think about anything, Stupid. I’m still your girlfriend.” She stares, holds her tears but fails. The tears start to flow again. Amber brushes her cheek with his thumb. She put her hand on his hand. Amber moves toward, starts to kiss her softly. Krystal slightly bites his lower lip. Now they use tongue. The kiss turns on lust. Krystal still spills the tears. But at that moment, she feels Amber’s tears too. It leads them into the bed (you know what I mean).

 

Saturday, 05.00 pm. Amber’s Apartment.

Amber already woke up first. Now, he is staring at krystal, quitely. Krystal is still sleeping in his embraces. They ended up in cuddle (You know after the bed business). He looks at his watch, which is broken because of the night show. It’s already 05.05 am. Still has 85 minutes. He makes a slightly move, tries to left the bed. But Krystal senses it. She hugs him tightly.

“Do you want to leave girl first? What a manner!” She says treating, still with her eyes closes.   

“Make a breakfast. Why should I left my gorgeous girlfriend when I still have time?” he explains calmly. Krystal opens her eyes and smiles. 

 

Saturday, 05.20 pm. Amber’s Apartment.

Krystal prepares the toast while Amber makes a coffee.

Krystal is spreading butternut jam to the toast and puts on tissue. All of their plate was broken. Amber pours a coffee in the half broken cup.

Krystal lifts her left eyebrows, amber chuckled, “I did’t have another cup. Remember, I was crashed them last night. Thought, this two is the most appropriate to use than the rest.”

Krystal lets out the real laugh. They eats that breakfast, both of them try to look fine, which is not.

“Krys, it’s already 5.50. You better take a bath.” He suggests. Krystal nods without offenses.

 

Saturday, 06.15 pm. Amber’s Apartment.

Krystal is coming out from the bathroom, “Amb?” she tries to call again, “Stupid?”

Realizes that Amber doesn’t reply, she looks around the apartment in hurried. She searches him everywhere but doesn’t find the figure. She loses her strength, ends up on the floor. She starts to cry again.

“How could you leave me without a word!” she shouts loud.

She continues speaks in crying,

“I know that I’m the one who is messing around.

I’m the worst girlfriend ever.

I’m the one who doesn’t suit at all for you.

I’m the stupid one.

I don’t know how do I live without you.

I’m the one who insanely love you.

I’m the one who is forced you to love me.

When I’m the one who know that I will be the first to left you.

But I, I just love you too much.”

“Stupid!” she screams between the tears.

Suddenly, the front door is opened. Amber grumbles, “Why do you scream my name in early morning. My neighbors will kick me out from here.” He looks annoyed.

She gets up and dashes to him. She hugs him tightly. Still with the flowing tears. “Where did you go?” she whispers.

“Just throw the garbage. You know leftover stuff from my night show.” He smiles widely. Krystal smiles in force. 

 

Saturday, 06.30 pm. Amber’s Apartment.

The door is knocked, both of them looks at the door. There is, Victoria already stands in the openly door.

Victoria says sound sympathy, “I’m sorry. Her parents already looks and waits for her.”

He understands. Amber broke the hug. Krystal releases the arms heavily.

“You must leave now princess.” He says, tries to be tough. She nods.

She cracks the tears again for the umpteenth times. But this time, she sobs and shivers hardly. She is already walking toward the door, suddenly turns around. She hugs Amber, probably for the last time.

She whispers, “I’m sorry Amb. I mean for everything.” Amber broke the hug, again. He is staring at her eyes, “You don’t. Actually I’m the one who must thank to you. You’re the most beautiful thing in my life. Thanks for being with when you could. Never blame yourself. It isn’t your fault.”

She nods, he continues and hand her a letter, “Here. Open it after you’re already in…”

She cuts off and kisses him passionately, probably for the last time. Then she broke the kiss.

She stares at Amber, “Don’t say that I warned you before!”

“Okay. I promise. But promise me, you open it when you already finish it. I will hate you for the rest of my life if you broke this promise.”

She nods again. Hold on the promise.

The door closes. Right now she is really gone.

He ends up on the floor, loses all his strength. Tears is cracked, falling down through his cheek.

 

2 hour and 30 minutes have passed by.

 

 

Saturday, 8.00 am. Somewhere out of the apartment.

There she is. Krystal wears the most beautiful bridal dress. She is already standing in the altar but without Amber.

The priest says, “I announce you as husband and wife.”

Amber stands from afar. Watching all the most important moment from the most beautiful girl in his life. He turns around and walks away when the priest announces it. He is walking away, carrying the heart, which was already broken. He lets the tears flow. Keeps it to himself.

 

Saturday, 8.15 am. Somewhere out of the apartment. 

Krystal is already sitting alone in a room. she doesn't want to waste time, she wants to read Amber's letter so badly. She tries to be strong and tough. She opens Amber’s letter as she promises to open it after the wedding. Honestly, She hardly tries to keep the promise. In fact she wants to open it in front of Amber at that time. But she didn't do it. Thought, that would be the last promise that she could keep it.

When she starts to read it, tears flows.

 

 

MEMOIR OF KRYSTAL JUNG, MY PRINCESS.

March, 28 2015.

From: YOUR STUPID, AMBER

To: KRYSTAL JUNG, The most beautiful princess in my life and on earth =)

Actually, I don’t want to write this before. But I do.

Why? Because I want to tell you the truth so badly, at least it makes me feel better. Keeping on my life.

 

On March, 20 2015.

Someone told me that your parent already arrange a marriage for you with somebody. I know that your parent forces us. It hurts me a lot. But face the fact, when it comes to your family. I don’t want you to regret later if you still choose me. So when that night you tell me the truth, I already know. But I still can’t accept it, till I see your pain. I know that it’s not only me that hurt because of it. You’re the one who hurt the most.

 

On March, 28 2015 - The most beautiful day in my life a.k.a the worst and the best with Krystal Jung, My princess =)

 

At 7 am – our apartment

You wake up my day with that smile then squeezes it with your dead glare. I love it =D

By the way, i planned to wake up earlier. but failed =(

 

At 8 am - our apartment

That is the most precious burnt toast of my life. You want to make a new one. But I’m insisted to eat it. Because I know that it will be my last burnt toast. I will miss that Krys =(

 

At 8.30 am – on the road, our car

We put small argument because I’m insisted to send you toward your work place. You are a little bit angry because you know I’m already late, which is I found it cute.

Miss this angry princess

 

At 9am till 5 pm – Princess’s office

It is the longest time that I’m waiting for you to go home, to our apartment. Actually, I skip my work. I say to my boss that my grandfather who was already passed away, die again. Don’t mad at me Krys. I want to see you for the last time. Staring at you when you are working.

PS: I spend 6 cup of coffee =P

 

At 5.15 pm – on the road, our car

I’m a liar! I say that I accidentally pass by your work place.

In fact, I’m already planning to pick you up.

 

At 6 pm – our favorite restaurant

I’m not lying to you. But I’m really hungry. What I can do, I skip my lunch.

But I’m not regret. I see you get lunch in our favorite place.

By the way I’m at the corner at your lunchtime, still can’t eat because hold on newspaper, take a peek. =D

 

At 7 pm – on the road, our car

I’m your loyal driver princess! =)

 

At 8 pm - our apartment

Actually, I put an argument on purpose. So, you will immediately leave me and hate me. I really do my best too ditch you away. But I forgot that you also my stubborn princess. I never win over you. How stupid I am =D

I’m sorry, saying those worst words to you. I didn’t really mean. I swear. God Knows!

 

At 9 pm - our apartment

It is the worst phrase in my life =(

When you say that you will marry him.

I know it but still can’t accept it. =(

 

At 10 pm - our apartment

It is the worst, best, stronger, memorable and sorrow fight that I have during our relationship. I swear.

How much money that I will spend to buy the new stuff =(

Just kidding Krys =D

But, honestly, I don’t want to see you’re crying like this night. It’s hurt me a lot. Promise me that it will be you last tears.

 

At 11 pm - our apartment

Thanks God. You remind me to stop my stupidity. I really don’t want to waste our time. Why am I really stupid?

 

The next few minutes. Forget the detail of time. =P

Without you know, probably. I’m staring at you, mesmerizing the most beautiful creature. I’m not flirty =)

Honestly, I try to capture every detail of you. so I don’t forget it. Just kidding, part that i forget it =)

You always be the love of my life.

 

At 01.00 am - our apartment

This bandage will be my favorite stuff start from today. It’s my precious souvenir that I got from our relationship. Hope you don’t mind. And I know that you don’t mind =D

 

At 00.30 am - our apartment

Do you remember when I started to ask you? Actually I have different answer in my mind. So here’s the confession Krys.

-What I love about you the most?

I love everything about you. this is also my mesmerizing part of you.

‘You have dark brown hair, which is fallen really beautiful.

When you complained you had hair bad day, I always said that it’s terrible one. Honestly, It still good day for me, saw those messy long hair.

I love the smell of your hair.

Although sometimes isn’t good one, I still like it.

You have attractive brown eyes, which is absolutely pretty.

Your dead glare, I always said to you to stop staring at me with that. But now I have to admit, I will definitely miss those eyes.

I will give everything to see your dead glare for every single day.

You have the cutest nose,

It isn’t perfectly nose I thought but I found it really cute. The cutest one, always made me smile when I heard the sound when she sneezes. 

You have addicted lips.

I found out that it was the worst lips when we kissed for the first time. But you knows the ropes! you really did the homework, Princess. Making me addicted to those lips.

You have gorgeous body.

I found that every part of her body is perfectly adorable.

You know, the bed part also amazing because of this part =P

I love how you see the world,

I love what you thought,

I love how you treat me which is sometimes turn into nightmare =D

I love your personality, which is stubborn, chic, whine, all of it =P

There’s a lot of thing, I love about you that I can’t write one by one.

In simple way, I just love, no, I mean I madly in love of everything about you, Krystal Jung.’

-when I ask you to describe me in 5 words. You’re wrong =) I win for the first time over you

I can't live without You!

-when you ask me about my first love

That girl was you, Krystal Jung.  I saw you at library for very first time. I really want to talk to you so badly that time. But your dead glare makes me scare. But still, you’re my first love and only my love of my life.

 

At 02.00 am. - our apartment. Cough =D

I’m really fond in love with this Krystal. You rarely make the first move. But you do. You don’t know how frustrated I am at first =(

But at the end, it was the best part of our bed session I ever had =D

By the way you learn new move, didn’t you? =P

 

At 04.00 am - our apartment

Here I’m. Writing this weird letter to you, while watching you sleeping.

Please Krys, erase those drooling. Just Kidding. =D

 

At 05.00 am - our apartment

Sorry Krys. I’m hungry.

At first I want to make a breakfast for us, continue writing while you are sleeping.

But you wake up and ruin my plan =(

By the way I write this part when I throw the garbage. Hope it doesn’t smell bad. =D

 

At 05.30 am - our apartment

The most memorable breakfast especially with those half broken cup and tissue. Such a beggar =D

 

At 06.00 am (around I thought) - our apartment. I’m outside.

Here I am again. In the hallway corridor, I lean my head on the wall and start to write. I hear everything that you say. That’s why I don't show up when you looking for me. In fact I can’t hold my tears. Such a baby. =(

You are not messing around.

You are the best girlfriend I ever had.

You wrong. You're suitable for me in every way. 

I’m the stupid one. Don’t change it!

I’m the one who can't live without you.

I’m the one who hardly madly in love with you.

You aren’t force me. I truly love you.

You don’t leave me. you’re always in my heart and head. irreplaceable!

You don’t know how much I love you more Kry. To the moon and back.

 

At 08.00 am. – Your Altar  (I try imagine you,  On my head).

You will be standing at that altar as the most beautiful, gorgeous and perfect bride. If I have a change, I want to stand there with you =)

PS: hope the groom run away before the wedding cause your dead glare. I pray to God! =D

 

My last words Krystal Jung, 

I don’t want to see you cry again.

Last night is your last tears.

You have to be happy.

You promise?

If I knew that we will apart like this, I will write every single day, hour, minute of our story in memoir. If only I knew.

And if....

if you break the promise that you open this before, like you always do. 

I will count it as sign from God that I will put huge fight for you. if only you did....

With a lot, lot, lot,lot,lot of LOVE

YOUR STUPID, AMBER

 

 

Saturday, 09.00 am. Somewhere out of the apartment.

Krystal sits down on the chair. she can sees the trace of Amber's tears on the paper,loses all her strength. “How can I make this promise to you, Stupid? I’m sorry I can’t keep this one. I already madly in love with you. Stupid.”

Krystal’s eyes is soaked by the tears, while her phone is vibrated. She takes the phone heavily and opens it.

‘Like I thought, you are the most beautiful, gorgeous, and perfect bride like I imagine on my mind. I’m happy for you. Looks like you keep on my promise this time. Still and always madly in love with you.’ –My Stupid-

"How can you do this to me? If only I Knew." Krystal says to herself.

She gets up from the chair and runs outside the building, searching for her stupid…

While Amber is already in somewhere out the apartment, afar.

 

 

 

CUT… THANKS TO READ =)

FEEL FREE TO COMMENT WHATEVER IT IS…

 

Note for you:

By the way, you didn’t cry, did you?

HOHOHOHO…. 

If yes! (I’m excited!!!!)

I step a head write such a sad story. Don’t want to put hope high…HOHOHOHO

By the way I’m sorry for the long title. Actually I’m not really sure which one is better…

Better to take voting, am I right? such a waste... =D

HOHOHOHO…

Also, I’m sorry about the grammar error. I’m insisted this time. Since I don’t know, put past or present if writing a letter… it is mess up, isn’t it?

My insomnia really bothers me lately….

Looks like I talk to myself, again…HUFF…