A hesitant hand against the small of her back guided her towards the wedding chamber.  Now that they were alone, her mother’s words floated around her head, the only preparation she had for their wedding night.  The fluttering of nerves had started once again.  The door closed behind them with a thud of finality, the air heavy with tension.  

“You must be tired.”  His voice was like honey, sounding much different in the quiet privacy than when it had echoed through the wedding hall.  It sent a nervous shiver down her spine.  

“Tis all right,” She assured him, glancing up to meet his eyes for a brief moment.  He looked, dare she say it, as unsure as she was.  That was natural she supposed, this was new to the both of them.  It did provide a bit of comfort to her.  

“I will call for some food, I doubt you’ve eaten all day,” He said, turning towards the door.  She placed a hand against his forearm, stopping him.

“I’m fine.  I am just tired and would prefer to sleep,” She said, only realizing once the words were out of how inappropriate it sounded.  Sleep on their wedding night and sleep were two very different things.  The warmth of embarrassment crept up her neck, looking away in shyness.  

He made no indication that he noticed her gaffe however, only offering an understanding smile.  She note the way his eyes crinkled at the corners and the glimmer of white that flashed when his lips parted.  

He was handsome, extremely so.  It didn’t help her nerves one bit.  

Gwiboon settled herself in front of the vanity, stripping her wrists and neck of the heavy jewelry she still wore.  She then began the slow process of pulling out the pins in her hair, untwisting and carding out any knots with her fingers.  She watched Jinki through the mirror as he removed his shoes and sat himself on the corner of the bed, his eyes flashing up to watch her.  

She took her time, in part to make sure she removed all the pins and but also to give herself time to relax.  It didn’t seem to do a bit of good however, his gaze felt heavy against her back, making her more self conscious than before.  Once her hair was satisfactory, she stood and Jinki met her in the middle of the room once again.  

“The bed clothes are there,” he pointed to a changing screen set up on the opposite side of the room.  

“I—,” She stopped, unsure how to articulate her thoughts; her gaze dropped to her feet as she flushed red once again.

Gentle fingers brushed her chin, encouraging her to lift her head.  His eyes were kind and patient as he waited for her to continue.

“The dress is… difficult to remove,” She whispered, watching as his cheeks turned a matching shade to her own.  She took a deep breath, trying to compose herself.  He was her husband, soon there would be no reason for such shy actions, but at that moment, it was the most intimate exchange with a man she had ever experienced.  

She gathered her long hair, bundling it up and off of her neck before turning with her back towards him, showing the complicated tyings of the gown.  She could feel the hesitation in his fingers as he began undoing the knots and clasps.  She let out a grateful sigh as it loosened on her frame, being able to breathe fully for the first time all day.  His fingers brushed against her bare skin, the touch feather light, so gentle she almost thought she imagined it.

“You’re dress was too tight,” he murmured, his tone soft and low with a hint of accusation.  

“Hmm?”

“The laces, they were tied too tight.  You look as if you’ve been whipped,” He answered, his fingers traced the indentions of her skin, making her shiver.  

“Tis all right,” She told him.  “I— I wanted to look my best.”

She felt him tense, as if her words had a physical effect on him.  “You looked beautiful,” he assured her.

“Thank you.” 

He cleared his throat awkwardly, “Go change,” he finally said but the words lacked any tone of command.  He made no attempt to touch her which was both a surprise and a relief.  His hesitance and respectful nature was helping to ease her fears.  Maybe it wouldn’t be as scary or painful as her mother had expressed, maybe not with him.  He was being so gentle, so kind.  She couldn’t imagine him ever hurting her, be it accidental or intentional.  

Maybe it was just wishful thinking but… she could see herself happy with this man, falling in love with this man.  Her heart blossomed at the thought.  

She slipped behind the screen, the first time being alone all day.  The dressed puddled to the floor around her feet, followed quickly by her undergarments.  It was such a relief to be rid of such restrictive clothing, feeling like her lungs were just now able to operate at their full capacity.  She slipped on the sleeping clothes that had been prepared for her, a simple sheath slip made of soft silk that reached below her knees and a robe that hung loosely around her frame.  She folded the dress over the screen before padding back into the room.

Jinki was seated on the bed once again, pulling at the ends of his sleeves with nervous fingers.  His head snapped up, a tight smile pulled at his lips when she entered the room.  They wordlessly switched positions; Gwiboon settled on the bed while Jinki went behind the screen to change.  As soon as she sat down, she understood his previous actions.  It was torturous to sit there, alone, waiting.  Her mind flooded with thoughts and worries of what was to come, what expectations he would have of her.  

Thankfully, Jinki didn’t leave her for long, his sleep clothes a matching set to hers except for the cotton pants beneath his robe.  His weight settled beside her, grasping her hand in his own.  “Gwiboon I—” He stopped, insecurity in his eyes.  Gwiboon couldn’t help but find it adorable.  Her mother had prepared her for many things that might occur on this special night, but her husband being a shy, polite gentleman was not one of them.  It was more than she could have ever hoped for.

Gwiboon acted on impulse, leaning forward and closing the space between them to press a chaste kiss against his cheek.  “Thank you,” she whispered.

His eyes were blown wide with surprise, “Whatever for?” 

She smiled, “For being so kind.”

“I do not know what I have done to warrant such a compliment, but I hope you will continue to see me in that light.  I know you must have many fears about me but I hope with time you can grow to see this union, to see me, as more than just a duty,” He said.  The words came out rushed and rehearsed as if he had been practicing for days. 

“I would like that very much,” She responded, softening at the smile that bloomed on his face.  

Jinki’s palm cupped her cheek, thumb brushing against her skin as he guided her closer.  He paused to give her a chance to reject, before closing the gap, their lips meeting for the first time.  The nervousness was still there, but the fear was gone.  He was gentle and considerate, treating her with such tenderness.  

She didn’t fear him or what was to come because she could see it in his eyes, he wanted this to work as desperately as she.  It was not just a marriage but a union of two souls.  They didn’t knew each other yet, but with time… they were bound to grow familiar and at ease in the others’ presence.  

He didn’t press for more, pulling back slowly, his smile warm and comforting.  “Shall we sleep?  It has been a long day for us both.”

She nodded, both of them getting to their feet only to peel back the bedding and slip inside.  Gwiboon’s heart was speeding up again, the weight of everything crashing down.  

She was in bed with a man.  

She was married.  

This was the first night of the rest of her life by his side.  

As if he could sense her panic, Jinki pulled her closer, pressing her palm against his chest.  She could feel his heart beating, just as fast as her own.  Her eyes met his only to find him smiling despite his nervousness, “Tis the first time for us both.”

Her face relaxed into a soft smile, “You are not what I expected.”

“I trust that is a good thing?”

“It is, undoubtedly it is.”

“Good.  I do not wish for my wife to hold any fear of me.  I will not touch you without your permission so please, sleep at ease,” He promised.

His words gave Gwiboon a peace of mind and happiness she couldn’t quite express.  It only made her want to get closer to him, to show him how much she appreciated his kind words and actions.  Perhaps it was the sleepiness pulling at her brain or the way the moonlight made the whole room seem magical, but she said the truest words her heart could conjure, “With time, I think I shall fall madly in love with you.”  

Jinki’s chuckle was like music to her tired ears, “And I, you.”  The last few particles of air between them were erased as he hugged her to his chest.  Her arm wrapped around his waist, sighing as sleep crept closer and closer.  It was a new sensation, being pressing against a solid, warm body as she slept.  New but wonderful. 

Perhaps she wouldn’t even need much time…. 

this is tagged fluff for a reason guys

this story gives me so many feels i can't even

i could go into a long and deep explaination of why jinki's character is so important

and how he's so progressive for the time/setting

by being the only one in the whole story who is breaking social norms and just.... yay feminist  

but i won't bore you with my commentary...