That day, I was super excited. I remember Mama coming around 8 am to take me. Kyungsoo wasn’t even up yet, since training was taking so much of his energy. I had no idea where the rest of the guys were. But I wasn’t that interested in knowing anyways. When Mama came to pick me up on some of the weekends, I used to forget about everything. And that is probably why Kyungsoo had been the one packing my stuff, because if it depended on me, I wouldn’t even pack.

It was around 5 am and I restless. I sat in the couch, gripping an empty bowl of cereal in my still tiny hands, constantly blowing the hair out of my face since it kept falling because my constantly moving body. I couldn’t stand still. I was always a kid that got super pumped with anything and everything. I was happy, full of sugar, and totally ready to go.

Mama had promised me she would bake with me all day, and if there was once thing I loved to do, was baking. And now that I think of it, I think I was influenced by Kyungsoo. And besides cooking, she told me she had bought a new horse to the farm. At the time that was like… the pony Jongdae never gave me. Serious business if you asked child me.

I glanced at the clock every 5 minutes. I had it all figured out. Kyungsoo would wake up at precisely 7 o’clock, run to my room, open the curtains, notice I’m not there, freak out, come to the living room, waking up everyone in the process. Which meant that with everyone awake, I would be able to talk for hours about how excited I was. Because really, I was a child that couldn’t stay still and shut up. Now that I see it, I think I got it from Chanyeol…

And not to brag or anything, but it totally worked.

At 9 am, Mama parked the car in our driveway and I saw her from the big window in the living room. I had my Winnie the Pooh backpack on and my hair was done to perfection by, as always, Kyungsoo. JongIn and Sehun had told me they once rode a horse and that it was really cool. And by the end of the stories about riding horses, my eyes were glowing immensely.

“I swear she will trade me for that horse…” I heard Kyungsoo mumble to Minseok, who laughed and gave him a light pat on the back.

“ I wanna live with Mama!!” I screamed excitedly, running to the front door, waiting for the knock.

“See?” Kyungsoo frowned and Minseok continued patting, laughing harder this time.

The ride to Mama’s house was quite long and since I was up since 5am, I slept like a rock the whole way. I only came to my senses when Mama opened the car door and pulled me into her arms so she could carry me inside. I felt embarrassed. I was already an 11 year old girl (a grown up, in my head) but I was still being carried around like I was a kid. But this time I would let it slip because shoot, I was tired and Mama smelled really good.

After lunch, Papa took me by the hand and led the way towards the barn. I loved their country house with a passion. I lived in the city with Kyungsoo and the other guys so I rarely had the change to breath in some fresh hair. And really, a child sometime needs some time away from their over-protective parent. Papa was so different from Kyungsoo in that way.

He was a man of few words, while Mama could talk all day long. When I was a baby, I used to be slightly afraid of Papa, but he proved me he was a really caring and loving father, husband and even, a grandfather. I never really got to spend a lot of time with him throughout the years, and since he rarely talked to me on the phone, we didn’t really communicate that well either. But he showed me his affection towards me through actions, and I learnt to appreciate every single action of his.

He carefully lifted me up onto the young black horse and told me to hand on tight to the horses’ mane. I had my heart beating at a rapid speed and my hands were sweating bullets, but I couldn’t deny the pleasurable rush of adrenaline running through my petite body. It was the first time in 11 years that I felt such thing. And I don’t think I ever felt anything alike. It was a pure emotion and an equally as pure response to the event. Papa chuckled.

The horse, held strong by Papa, started slowly walking forwards, making me squeal loudly in joy. That was much, much better than the pony Jongdae promised me.

After what had felt like an eternity, Mama came to call us in for a snack, and yet again, Papa took me by the hand back to the house, where I clearly remember having Mama’s amazing nut cookies that even today make my mouth water in delight.

The days I spent away from Kyungsoo were always a challenge to me, since I was too acostumized to having him right beside me, always fixing my hair or my clothes, always holding my hand or carrying me around in his arms. I always had Kyungsoo there. But days like those, spent away from the city, away from Kyungsoo, away from my “11 appas’”, became, overtime, something I treasured.

And you’ll see why.