KSE

Christmas, winter, snowflakes, mistletoe, gloves, carols in the shopping centre – festive season has arrived.

I’ve always loved this time of the year, where I would spend some quality time with my family and friends. We’d share each other’s happenings after a while apart and happily share presents over a nice Christmas dinner with Umma’s roast turkey and cranberry jam as the main dish. Christmas was supposed to be a time to enjoy the snowy weather and let all of our stresses escape from our minds but in the winter season of 2002, it was one of the exceptions.

It was a strange season that ended rather fulfilling in some ways.

…

The ending weeks of 2002 were meant to be memorable, joyful and relieving as my friends and I were graduating from primary school. After finishing our end of year exams, many social events were ahead of us. We had the Social Dance, Graduation and my annual Christmas party (which became the after-graduation party). But when things weren’t exactly smooth sailing for our dearest Jieun and Kikwang. That had disturbed our feelings amongst the group. Days were passing by even flatter than the day before.  So, being the cheerful mood-making member of the group, I had to make something happen. That’s with the help of my trusty Jang Wooyoung of course.

A few days after our final exams had finished; I waited for Wooyoung after school for a chat.

“Wooyoungie, wait!”

“Eh? So Eunnie, you haven’t left yet?” Wooyoung turned to face me. He then gave me his bright smile that never failed to make me feel that little bit flustered.

“Yeah, I have something to talk to you about. Can you spare me five minutes, chingu-ah?” Wooyoung will help me right? I trust him because he is my best friend. Trust was something that I had shared with Wooyoung as we spent more time together and built a strong relationship. Be it friendship, or something more, I still consider Wooyoung as a very important person in my life. I could lean on him, as he can with me.

“Oh, chincha? I have something to um—ask you too…” I wonder what he wants to ask me? I’m guessing he wants to do something about the situation too…

“Okay, you go first then Wooyoungie.” I offered.

“Ani, So Eunnie, you go first.” Wooyoung assured. I nodded in response.

“Arasso. Well, you know…about Jieun and Kikwang,” I began.

“They’re still not talking to each other…I’m getting worried too.” Wooyoung answered. Ah, of course he understands what I’m thinking. Most of the time, Wooyoung and I had shared a mutual understanding of our ways of thinking or actions. It was easy to read what the other was thinking bar some exceptions.

“That’s exactly what I want to talk about. Jieun told me that her problems were not improving. She didn’t want to talk about it. But when she did say something, she always looked upset…” I explained with a worried expression. I used to think that the situation was unfair but as time went by, I realised that this was common amongst couples. They fight, they love, they bond; a relationship is like a roller coaster.

“I know. Jieun doesn’t seem like her cheerful self at all. Kikwang opened up to me a little. He said that Jieun had driven him crazy because she was stubborn and clingy. Maybe he is just frustrated…because I’m sure he misses her.” Jieun is stubborn and clingy? He is the one who is stubborn. Women always think the opposite of what men thought. Who likes to be in the wrong anyway?

“Okay, I guess Jieun may act like that because she doesn’t want anyone to touch Kikwang. It is because she likes him a lot. I’m seriously worried. You know how our friend is like, whenever she gets too emotional she likes to hide in her own corner, ignoring everything around her.” I said, in Jieun’s defense.

“I understand. We should help cheer them up somehow. There are many fun events coming up so it would be good if they made up. Ah, it’s so sad, seeing them like this for so long. I guess this is why I’m glad that I’m not dating because I probably can’t handle it.” He’s glad that he’s not dating…that’s the second time he’s said that. Maybe he already gave up all his feelings, and maybe I should too. Give up every inch of what is left. That was what I had thought at the time. Wooyoung’s words were definitely true and had reflected what I had felt deep inside. But his words did upset me; more than I had expected. I believed that our time was almost over and that I had to get over my first love.

“I guess so…so what were you going to ask me?” I said softly.

“Well, it’s nothing big…but you know…the end of year dance…” Was he about to...ask me? No way.

“Yeah, it’s coming up very soon…” I said awkwardly. I had tried to act neutral, but knowing Wooyoung, he definitely would have noticed my nerves.

“So, I was wondering… Will you my best friend do me the pleasure in going to the dance as my partner?” Finally, Jang Wooyoung. I really thought you wouldn’t have asked. I have never been happier. I was relieved, more than I can ever imagine. Maybe I wasn’t absolutely head over heels for Wooyoung at that time, but I still harboured some feelings for him. He has always held a soft spot from within me, and sometimes that spot will decide to blossom larger than usual.

“Yes! Yes, of course! Uh…I mean, I’d love to, best friend. I—uh, thought that you wouldn’t have asked…” I almost screamed in response. This was embarrassing, as I had felt my young cheeks firing up. Wooyoung immediately grinned widely, making his cheeks rising upwards as well. He then quickly pulled me into his embrace, digging his way in my hair.

“ASSA! THANK YOU KIM SO EUN! You have no idea how much I wanted to ask you and how much I was scared that you wouldn’t accept me.” Wooyoung admitted, as he held me tighter in his arms. I then suddenly felt his heart beating fast, even faster than mine. We were ridiculously happy, even if we were just going as best friends.

“Hah, how long had you wanted to ask me? I don’t get it; you didn’t have to be scared. We’re best friends, pabo-yah.” I said, while patting his back. Wooyoung then pulled away slightly, but still maintaining his hold on my waist.

“I’ll be honest…I wanted to ask you since…last year’s dance ended.” Chincha? Wooyoungie…you are one of a kind.

“Aish, silly boy. Well let’s hope this year will be much more exciting than last years! It’s our last in primary school, so we should enjoy it!” I said as I pinched Wooyoung’s cheeks. He was too cute to resist.

“Yeah, we didn’t exactly have the time of our lives did we? But, So Eunnie, don’t get too excited chingu-ah. We need to make sure Jieun and Kikwang go together and hopefully make up beforehand! Our friends is more important, arasso?” said Wooyoung with his serious tone. I’m so bad. I almost forgot about that issue for a moment. Calm down, So Eun. It is just Wooyoungie, there’s no need to be this happy.

“Yes, obviously. We have a mission to complete. Wooyoungie, fighting!” I encouraged, while giving Wooyoung a fist pump.

“Fighting! Thanks again best friend, for being my dance date! See you tomorrow!” Wooyoung greeted, before giving me a quick kiss on my forehead. Oh my god, did he just…kiss me?!

“YAH! JANG WOOYOUNG!” I yelled, before Wooyoung just gave me the thumbs up and continued to run away from me, leaving me in complete awe of the moment. It was the first time he kissed me, and there’s no doubt that I felt a little flustered but I just let it go because I knew we were just friends.

My younger self then walked towards Bummie oppa’s car with a sheepish grin plastered on my face. Everyone could see that I was undeniably happy. As I reached the car, I waved at my oppa, before noticing that he wasn’t alone. Myungsoo oppa was sitting in the passenger seat. I smiled at him, while bowing slightly before entering the vehicle.

“Oppa! Sorry to keep you and Myungsoo oppa waiting.” I apologised.

“Yah, what took you so long and why are suddenly all hyped up and happy?” Bummie oppa asked curiously. I just shrugged and giggled in reply.

“Kim So Eun, did that Wooyoung friend confess to you or something?” Myungsoo oppa said coldly. Is Myung oppa…jealous? Aye, no way. There was no chance of Myungsoo oppa being jealous over Wooyoung. Or at least he shouldn’t be. He’s a protective oppa and that was what I wanted to believe that it just ended there and not going beyond that line. I just tried to brush off anything strange aside back then.

“Aniyo, Myung oppa. We aren’t like that. We are just best friends! Best friends who are going to the dance…together. That’s all, so there’s nothing to worry about.” I confessed in confidence. It was the truth and I had felt obliged to explain the entire situation to Myungsoo oppa. It just felt necessary.

“WHAT? WOOYOUNGIE ASKED YOU TO GO TOGETHER? I thought he didn’t have it in him. Like last year…didn’t he go with that Kim Tae—“ I cut off Bummie oppa’s words. Yes, despite Wooyoung was kind of close with that girl, I still held some hostility towards her.

“Yes he did. But I’m his partner this year and it’s going to be super fun, okay oppa?” I muttered, in attempt to give him a signal to stop taking this matter further because of the passenger’s clear discomfort.

“Arasso, whatever makes you happy, my So Eunnie.” Oppa conceded, before refocusing on driving.

I then tried to clear the intense atmosphere, or rather mental distance between Myungsoo oppa and I. It seemed like today was one of his ‘off’ days.

“Myungie oppa, are you okay? Did you have a bad day at school?” I asked sweetly, while placing my hands on his shoulders from behind.

“So Eunnie, promise me one thing.” He said, as he turned his head to whisper into my ear, in the smallest voice possible. He probably didn’t want Bum oppa to hear.

“Neh, oppa…”

“Don’t get yourself hurt again.” Hurt by whom? Wooyoungie? How does he know? Woo is just my best friend, why doesn’t he get it?

I was confused. Myungsoo oppa had never said anything like that before, nor has he acted so cold and serious towards me before. I know he was just looking out for his younger dongsaeng but something was wrong. I had felt very worried because I was dying to know what exactly was upsetting him. I cared, just like he cared for me.

…

Three weeks after Wooyoung had invited me to the dance, the event itself had already arrived. The dance was surely not going to be as painful as last years. Most of our friends had stuck with their partners from last time. Ye Eun was not going to allow Chansung to go with anyone else and Kwonnie was eager to go with Miyoung again. But unfortunately, Jieun and Kikwang didn’t go together. We tried our best to make it happen, and we almost succeeded. The two had already started to talk to each other again during lunch times, but they were still very far from reconciliation. So, somehow, Jieun was going with Doojoon, my partner from last year, and Kikwang got stuck with Kim Taeyeon. I felt sorry for the guy, but I guess it was partially his doing. If he was mature enough to patch things up like a man with his (former) girl, then he could’ve avoided her. But things don’t always go in the way we want them to. I knew that fact all to well.

So, in preparation for the final dance, we had practice lessons like last year. They were the same dances, but the feeling was different…the partner was different. Doojoon is not a pabo or anything, but he was a little too clingy so I didn’t really enjoy the dancing too much. With Wooyoung, being the dancing machine he is, he had made the experience vastly more enjoyable, without a doubt. I’d be lying if I felt absolutely nothing during our lessons, because my younger self did, to an extent that it was scary. She tried her best not to show it, as she constantly reminded herself that Jang Wooyoung is her best friend and nothing more. How long did that last? It was definitely questionable.

On the night of the dance, Wooyoung (or rather his Umma) had come over to my house to pick me up with a bouquet of pink roses. I remembered that it was the second time that he gifted me flowers, and I was just as touched as the first time. He was dressed in a white long sleeved shirt, with a slim black vest and along with a red bow tie, matching my short red and black lace dress. Everything was perfect, Jang Wooyoung is perfect, to be honest. He’s still the same flawless yet dorky boy that I had met in Grade 5, even until this day.

“Wow, Jang Wooyoung! You look so good-looking in that vest! Where is my Wooyoungie and what did you do to him?” I joked, as Wooyoung appeared at my doorstep.

“Yah, So Eunnie! Aren’t I already good-looking? What do you mean by that?” Wooyoung bluffed.

“Whatever makes you happy, chingu-ah.” I said, while giving him a slight slap on his arm.

“You look…beautiful, Kim So Eun. I really mean it.” I am…beautiful? He’s exaggerating… My cheeks had indeed flushed bright red, almost as red as my dress.

“Aigoo, thanks chingu-ah!”

“Oh, by the way, these are for you.” Wooyoung finally handed me his flowers. I was waiting for them because they smelt so amazing.

“Ah, you didn’t have to!” I said, while tugging my arm around his shoulder.

“My Umma insisted…so yeah, I know you love flowers anyway.” Wooyoung said shyly.

“Okay, I’ll just ask Umma to come and put these beautiful flowers inside and we should head off.” I said, while running back into the house and returned in a flash.

“Let’s go?” Wooyoung then stuck his arm out, inviting mine to be hooked into his. I gladly did so, of course.

“Let’s go, Wooyoungie.”

“Annyeonghaesayo, Mrs. Jang! It’s been a while!”

“Annyeong, So Eun-ah. You look very pretty tonight.” She complimented, which made me even shyer.

“Uh, thank you, Mrs. Kim. Wooyoung dressed better….”

After fifteen minutes, we had arrived at the same hall in Gangnam as last year. We bid goodbye to Wooyoung’s Umma and she wished us to have a memorable night and not to forget to take photos. Wooyoung then led me inside he venue, while initiating his hand to intertwine with mine beforehand. He had looked at me with questioning eyes, and I just nodded and smiled in return. No words were spoken in that exchange, since we both knew that this was going to be a special night and we really wanted to make some nice memories.

So we met our friends, who were already there and each of them was arm in arm with their partners with victorious smiles across their faces. They were excited, even Jieun and Kikwang were smiling for once, while stealing ‘secretive’ glances at each other. I saw that as a glimmer of hope for the two, and it felt like a mount of pressure was off my shoulders.

“Wooyoungie, it looks like our mission might be easier than we thought.” I whispered into Wooyoung’s ear, before waving to all the couples.

“Annyeong, my friends! It’s finally here! The last social event of primary school!” I greeted happily.

“Omo, you two look so good together! Come here best friends!” Ye Eun complimented, as she ran over to us to form a warm group hug.

“Yah, Lee Jieun, come on over too!”

“Aigoo, everyone let’s have a group hug together!” Wooyoung yelled, before all the kids joined us for a cheerful group embrace. I missed those times when we were generally stress-free (post exams) and we were so happy in finishing primary school together. The feeling was great, and I managed to flash glances with every member of our group of friends, and I finally understood how special they were to me.

Shortly after, we were called to line up in a line behind the opening banner, which read ‘Leavers 2002’. This time, Taeyeon and Kikwang lead the pack from the front, contrary to Ye Eun and Chansung leading from last year. I knew that Taeyeon would not let her guard down two years in a row. I almost admired her passion for being the class president, almost.

Throughout the night, we had danced the same routines as last time. Tango, salsa, jive, waltz, hip-hop; we did it all. It was fun, as Wooyoung and I had a blast. But the highlight was of course the circle jive dance, where we got to rotate partners. Not that because I wanted to separate from my best friend, but I wanted to take the moment to share what could be our last moments with my classmates.

With M2M’s ‘Pretty Boy’, Destiny’s Child’s ‘Emotions’, Mariah Carey’s ‘Thank God I Found You’, Backstreet Boys’ ‘I Need You Tonight’ and more romantic tunes pumping through the speakers, this dance was beautiful.

Starting with Wooyoung, I calmly placed one hand on his right shoulder and the other grasped tightly on his left hand and my eyes fixated on his, we danced joyfully with swift steps.

“So Eunnie…” Wooyoung whispered.

“What is it Wooyoung-ah?”

“I’m really glad that I’m here dancing with you and…I don’t want this night to end.” Wooyoung, I’m very glad too. My eyes had begun to water when the reality kicked in. When the last song plays, the night was going to be over. That meant that, Wooyoung and I might never share something special like this again. Why did I feel like this may very well be an end? I felt like it was possibly the end to something that I have held onto for the best part of three years. It was my gut feeling.

“Me too. I wouldn’t be here with anyone but you, Jang Wooyoung. I don’t say this enough, but I really am lucky to have met a great guy like you and I’m proud that you are my best friend.” I said, while giving Wooyoung a warm hug. I had pressed myself onto his chest and embraced him tightly. I wanted to let Wooyoung know that no matter how much we went through, he’d always be my friend.

“Aigoo, So Eunnie, why are you like this? Don’t cry it’s not like you won’t see me again. And I should be the one thanking you for being my lovely best friend!” Wooyoung said, while wiping my small tears away, before letting me go to rotate to my next partner.

“I won’t forget this night, Wooyoung. Ever.”

“Me too.”

The dance night had concluded, after a few more dance rotations where I had danced with Kwonnie, Chansung and lastly Doojoon. I had fun with Kwonnie and Chansung, as I was teasing them about Miyoung and my other best friend Ye Eun, who Chansung has held a long time crush on. But like many crushes, the two of them sadly, did not end up together after primary school. They had decided to remain friends before anything grew stronger. Ye Eun always knew what she was doing. The dance with Doojoon was surprisingly fun. He’s a nice and fun guy, when he wasn’t clinging onto me like glue. I just saw him as a good friend and nothing more.

By the very end, I had greeted all my friends goodbye, before Bummie oppa arrived to drive me back home.

“So, did you have fun with Wooyoungie? Did he kiss you?” Aish, of course not! My younger self looked down at the thought of Wooyoung kissing me. It was ridiculous of Bummie oppa to think that it would happen.

“We had a blast, and no we did not kiss! How many times do I have to say that we are just best friends, oppa?!” I argued, before giving oppa the evils.

“Hah, sure. You two will never convince me that you guys are just friends!” Oppa teased again.

“Just drive, oppa!”

Oppa managed to keep his belief from that night until this day. I used to think he just liked to tease me because Wooyoung was the first boy that I had liked for real. But I realised later, it was because he wasn’t all that delusional because there were times, even long after that dance night, where I needed to question our relationship.

…

Two days later, it was the day of our graduation and my Christmas party. In the morning, Umma had woken me up extra early to do my hair prettily and to make sure there were no creases in my blazer and uniform. Umma always cared about how I looked; so on the day of my graduation, I definitely wasn’t allowed to argue with her.

Umma had styled my hair with soft curls on the ends complimenting a half tied ponytail. She then decided to finish the style off with a cute, pink ribbon tied into a bow at the front. I had to admit; Umma always knew how to dress me up nicely. I was thankful for that.

After breakfast, my parents, Bummie oppa and I headed off to my graduation ceremony held at the school’s auditorium. In the car ride, we shared some family bonding time.

“Aigoo, my So Eunnie growing up! She’s graduating already!” Appa said.

“Hah, I’m only twelve Appa. I’ve still got high school and university to go. It’s not over yet!”

“I’m so proud of you, my precious daughter. Now that you’ve graduated, you’ll need to be more independent and responsible, arasso?” Umma urged. For sure, I had already anticipated how everything was going to change in high school and I was prepared to make the move, or so I thought. Ambitious pre-teenagers were all like that.

“Thanks, Umma…”

“My dongsaeng, it’s been so fast! I still remember your first day of school. You are still the same little girl, but just much more prettier and not so innocent!” Oppa said, before I gave him a slap on the arm.

“I’m still innocent!” I defended.

I had continued to bicker with my oppa throughout the rest of the ride. It was fun but we probably were too noisy and loud at times. Our parents must’ve wanted to super-glue our lips in annoyance. But, this was what was good about our oppa-dongsaeng relationship. We tease each other, we joke around and play rough but we love each other a lot. Oppa really takes care of me, and I’m thankful for him being a great brother that I can always rely on.

Once we had arrived at school, I gave my family hugs and kisses before going backstage to join my fellow graduates. I was early for once, and not everyone was here. I searched for Ye Eun first because I knew she’d be here since she was the vice president. Shortly after, I indeed found my best friend, as I saw the pretty back view of hers. She had worn her hair in a neat, plated bun with a navy blue bow. I ran towards her and wrapped my arms around her shoulders with a ‘boo’. I managed to surprise the usually cool, calm and collected girl as she jumped in shock.

“Yah! You scared me!” Ye Eun screamed, while patting her pounding chest.

“Annyeong, Ye Eun-ah! Hah, the look on your face—“

“Kim So Eun! Don’t do that!” Ye Eun pouted, as I hugged her tighter.

“Arasso, mianhae chingu-ah. Anyway, congratulations Miss. VP! We’re finally graduating after seven years!” I said happily.

“Aigoo, congrats to you too, So Eunnie! We made it! I can’t believe that we’ve finished primary school!” Ye Eun said, while clapping her hands with mine.

After our little best friend moment, our friends came along pretty quickly. What had surprised Ye Eun and I was that we saw that two particular friends had come in together. They weren’t holding hands, but simply talking with their eyes beaming as bright as the light. I gave Ye Eun a wink in delight.

“Jieunnie! Kikwang-ah! You guys are here…together.” We said, while giving both of them hugs.

“Uh, we just um, met each other outside with our parents…so we just walked together in coincidence, right Kikwang-ah?” Jieun explained shyly, while giving Kikwang a small nudge. Looks like things are going to be back to normal soon.

“Yeah, that’s true…Congrats girls, we did it!” Kikwang said awkwardly with a sheepish smile. Aigoo, this boy is cute when he is all shy. No wonder Jieunnie likes him so much.

“Hah, congrats to you two too!” Ye Eun teased, which make us all chuckle.

Following the two rejuvenated lovebirds, Kwonnie, Chansung and Doojoon had arrived. We all gave our congratulations and greetings. Doojoon didn’t let the opportunity to give me a bear hug go of course. I didn’t mind it at all though. It was graduation, so I let it off. It felt nice in his arms anyway.

However, he had pulled away quicker than usual and he signaled me to turn around. I did exactly that, only to see my other best friend entering the area with a tensed expression. I almost forgot that that chingu didn’t like Doojoon all too much. That meant I had to cheer the kid up again. That kid was just one of a kind.

I ran towards my best friend cheerfully and attacked him with a bear hug.

“Wooyoungie you’re finally here! Why are you so late?” I said with my aegyo attempt. Wooyoung chuckled in response as he returned my hug, wrapping his arms around my shoulders.

“Your hair looks nice today.” He said while running his fingers through my soft curls. I loved it when he did that. Every single time.

“Thanks Wooyoungie. Umma styled it prettily didn’t she?”

“You are pretty.” Aish, this is embarrassing. My cheeks had flared up at his compliment.

“Aish, you two! It’s time to get on stage now!” Kim Taeyeon demanded, so we quickly followed Miss. President’s orders.

The ceremony was a slight snore fest, to be honest. The highlight was Ye Eun’s speech that almost brought a tear to my eye. She was that amazing best friend that was flawless like a goddess and still is. The other exciting moments were when the awards were announced. Ye Eun took out the prize as the Most Outstanding Student, no surprises there. Doojoon won Athlete of the Year and Wooyoung took home the Artist of the Year award. Jieun had taken home the Math award, since she was the top ace in that subject, even better than Ye Eun. I somehow received the Korean History award, to the surprise of not just me but also my fellow classmates and family. I thought that award had Miyoung written all over it, so call me lucky. I was extremely happy to not walk out empty handed.

After the conclusion of the ceremony and photographs with our families, we all headed back to my house for the after party. The fun was just about to start.

We had celebrated with loud music pumping out from the speakers, with songs by H.O.T, BoA, Fly To The Sky, Coldplay and more. We also had some scrumptious party food like tteokbokki, japchae, sushi and barbequed Korean grade beef. Being the game lovers we were, we played some Uno and Twister where the competitiveness within our young selves were firing up. After we had played several games at our heart’s content, it was time for some bonding time before the cake was being served.

“So guys, what would you miss about primary school?” I asked my friends.

“I’m going to miss Teacher Ko!”Kwon blurted out, causing some up roar.

“You’re kidding?! How could you! He’s a total d-bag!” Chansung stated, with everyone nodding in agreement.

“Heh, of course I’m kidding. I hate his guts because he never liked me.” Come to think about it, whenever Kwon asked a question, Teacher Ko would never answer him kindly. Biased teaching was evident back in those days. Ko always favoured the girls, especially Taeyeon. What a erted bastard unprofessional teacher.

“I’m going to miss making fun of you guys.” Taeyeon said. She invited herself here because I invited Miyoung. They say that once a , always a . Yeah, I still don’t like that girl all that much.

“Yah, Kim Taeyeon!” Miyoung complained.

“I’m going to miss playing soccer with the boys, especially Wooyoung because he does some crazy tricks that hurt people.” Kikwang teased, as we had remembered that incident in Grade 5 where I infamously got knocked out by my best friend’s fire ball.

“I will never forget that day, Jang Wooyoung! Aish, just thinking about it makes me pissed!” I said, pretending to be frustrated at the boy.

“Aigoo, stop pretending. You forgave me ages ago, Kim So Eun!” Wooyoung defended. Ah, he thinks he knows me that well? Whatever, bluffer.

“I will miss going to eat ice cream with you guys after school. It was some of my best memories.” Jieun stated, with a bittersweet smile. She was thinking about the last time we had ice cream together. It wasn’t really fun at all. But all the other times were the most enjoyable.

“Ah yes, how could we forget?” Ye Eun said.

“You guys only went amongst yourself! So Eunnie never invited me.” Doojoon said in jealousy.

“Yeah, us too! Unfair!” Chansung and Kwon said.

“What about us?” Miyoung said kindly.

“Arasso, we should all go together next time.” I said.

“We’d better!”

“Hey guys, I have something to say….” Wooyoung suddenly announced. I wonder what’s he going to say. It looks important…

“I won’t be going to Seoul High School with you guys.” No way, why is he not coming? I thought we were all continuing together? Why, Wooyoungie?

“Chincha? I thought you were? Why aren’t you now?” Ye Eun asked in worry.I remained silent. I was overly surprised and disappointed at his announcement.

“I’ll be going to Jeonju Arts High School instead. My parents had applied to that school just for luck, because it is very hard to get in and apparently I got in at the last minute…I am so sorry, my friends.” He explained while staring at me in sorrow. Wooyoung knew how upset we would be, how us best friends would be, how I upset I would be. It was a great opportunity for him to attend Jeonju Arts, because it was one of the most prestigious Arts schools in Seoul. Seoul High was amongst the best too, but they specialised in sports and languages.

I knew this fact, but by no means that I was contempt with Wooyoung not attending the same school as us. I wished that he could do well; no I knew that he would do well since he loved dancing and singing so much. But I was young, so I couldn’t deal with tough things well. I imagined my high school life without seeing and attending classes with Wooyoung everyday. I was devastated, shattered and felt like a dagger had drove through my heart. I was utterly sad that I couldn’t see my best friend, first and foremost, very often. I was close to tears, even more so, compared to all my other saddened friends. Wooyoung was a good friend to everyone; everyone had enjoyed his joyful company.

“Wooyoung…do you have to go?” I whispered quietly. Wooyoung just gave me a tender smile in return.

“Don’t worry guys, we will still catch up! I’ll still use messenger! And most importantly, we will still have ice cream together…but just not as often.” Wooyoung said, in attempt to comfort our friends and myself. I couldn’t take the in the fact that Wooyoung was leaving us. It didn’t matter that we could still hang out sometimes. It was the matter of fact that we couldn’t make more memories in school together. It wouldn’t be the same without him.

So, I ran, fast into the bathroom. I just hoped he wouldn’t follow me, as I just wanted to be alone, without anyone seeing me in such state.

Though my luck was never that good. After a good fifteen minutes, I heard a knock on the bathroom door.

“So Eunnie. Let your oppa in. Come on, don’t be like this.” Bummie oppa said. I had reluctantly opened the door, leaving a small gap, before returning to the toilet seat and burying my face into my hands again.

“Aigoo, my baby sister, don’t cry…. It’s not like you won’t be seeing him again. You can still hang out on the weekends and oppa can drive you to eat ice cream with him and Ye Eun and Jieunnie like old times.” Oppa pleaded, while capturing me in his arms.

“I know oppa…but I’m just really sad. I can’t even imagine how it’s going to be like without him…I can’t help it…The tears won’t stop.” I mumbled, while continuing to cry.

Oppa had done what he did best, wiping his dongsaeng’s tears away. He cared for me, no matter how silly I was.

“Crying won’t make Wooyoung go to Seoul High. Nothing will. Just be happy for him. He’s going to go to Jeonju Arts, the school where idols debut from. It’s the best for his future and don’t you want to see Wooyoung dancing on TV?” I should be happy for him, he wants to go because it would give him many opportunities. I should just let him go, once and for all. I thought to myself. It was selfish of me to think like that, but I guess it was just out of shock and it took me a long while to digest.

“Okay, oppa. I will wish him well. He’s my best friend after all. I’ll still be sad, but I think I should hold it in because if Wooyoung sees me like this, he’ll be sad too.” I said, while my tears had finally dried up.

“That’s my girl…now you still have to tell him about our holiday too. He’d probably want to know that you going away for three weeks. Or else he might cry himself to sleep because you left him hanging. Silly kids. Go.” Bummie oppa joked, as he brought me up to stand.

“Thank you oppa. I love you.” I said, as I gave him a kiss on his cheek.

“I love you too, So Eunnie. Now go to the poor boy. He’s waiting outside in the garden.” Oppa said while patting my head.

“Okay…has everyone left already?” I asked.

“Yeah, they just left.”

I nodded and mouthed a ‘thank you’ before heading out to the garden.

I saw Wooyoung sitting on the edge of the verandah. I slowly sat beside him.

“So Eunnie, let me explain—“ He spoke, before I interrupted by holding onto his hand.

“You don’t have too, Wooyoung-ah. I understand now. I’m sorry for being selfish and leaving like that before. I’m so immature.” I confessed.

“You’re everything but selfish and immature. Don’t put yourself down like that. Are you sure you’re okay with it?” He asked.

“Positive. I’m going to be sad for a while because I won’t be able to spend high school with you, but I’ll get over it. Don’t worry, chingu-ah. We all will be okay.” I said, while giving him a reassuring smile.

“Don’t you dare replace me though, Kim So Eun.” He warned, and I laughed at his seriousness.

“I can’t guarantee—“

“You better not! Or else I’m going to be very angry!” Wooyoung pouted. He was cute when he was angry.

“Arasso…”

“Anyway, Wooyoung-ah, I have to tell you something too.” I said, as we both had calmed down.

“Go ahead, So Eunnie.”

“I’m going on a holiday to America for three weeks.”

“Oh chincha? I’m so jealous! I’ve never been before! Whom are you going with?” Wooyoung asked in envy. Thank god he wasn’t angry for me leaving…

“We’re going with um…Myungsoo oppa and his family.” I mumbled.

“WITH THAT GUY? WHAT WHY?” Wooyoung yelled. It seemed like he didn’t like Myungsoo oppa either. Funny boy, isn’t he?

“Well, his family is close with ours and he is almost inseparable from Bummie oppa so…” I explained.

“Okay fine. Just don’t get too close to him. I don’t like the guy at all. He’s a bast—“

“Yah! Don’t curse him!” I growled, while almost punching Wooyoung off of the verandah.

“Fine…have fun then. I have something else to tell you too.” Wooyoung said. Aish, he better not be leaving the country or something.

“What is it?”

“Kim So Eun, I’d just like you to know that I never really stopped liking you ever since the first day we’ve met. I’m sorry that I was always a shy and jealous coward. But most importantly, despite all my feelings, I’m honoured to be your best friend.” Oh Wooyoung…why do you always say sincere words that make me want to cry? You’re just too nice for your own good, best friend.

Wooyoung then my hot cheeks lovingly. He never failed to make me feel more special than I deserved.

“Wooyoung…I’m sorry for telling you that I fell out of love with you a year ago. It was true at the time, but I’d just like you to know that you are a very important person in my life and you’d always hold a special spot in my heart, chincha. And yes, I’m so happy to be your best friend of three years and I hope for the rest of our lives as well.” This was my real thoughts. Although Wooyoung was my first love, I finally realised how glad I was that I considered him as my best friend rather than a boyfriend. Sure, we both ‘loved’ each other and it was obvious to the whole world, but the thought of losing Wooyoung if anything bad happened to us would have been so much more heartbreaking.

“So Eunnie, thank you. I feel the same. I used to feel so disappointed that I rejected your feelings for me and I was worried that you didn’t like me back like how I liked you. But now I think it was silly for me to think like that. Sure I wanted to date you like how Jieun and Kikwang dated. Sure, I wanted to call you mine. But we probably won’t be this close and trust each other like this,” Wooyoung confessed. At this moment, we both were crying. This was the first time that we sincerely said what was held deep inside our young hearts. It felt good to finally let all our worries out. I was happy.

“So, as we won’t be attending the same school, and we won’t be able to see each other everyday, you better not forget to call me out for ice cream with the girls from time to time. Oh and, make sure Yoon Doojoon and that Myungsoo guy don’t tag along either.” Wooyoung chuckled, which made me pat his head like a child. He was precious like that. I admired him for always taking care of me.

“Aigoo, you’re still the same boy as three years ago. Looks pretty strong, but actually is the opposite.” I teased.

“Yah, Kim So Eun….”

“Hah, it’s true. Jang Wooyoung promise me one thing?”

“Anything for you my So Eunnie.”

“Promise me that we’d stay best friends forever, no matter what happens after this day.” I said sincerely.

Wooyoung then suddenly gave me a peck on my lips, which made me freeze in my spot. He really did kiss me on the lips, and it was my very first kiss. I was too stunned with mixed feelings at the time to react.

“I’ll always will be.”

To this day, I would still remember all the memories I shared with my friends, family and Jang Wooyoung throughout primary school. Wooyoung had always been a very important figure of my life and I had always held him close to my heart. He was the first guy that I loved, the first to give me flowers, the first to hold my hand and the first to kiss me. He was my everything, my first love. But in the end of that year, I realised that at that time, he would always be my best friend. I wasn’t sure about whether we would fall in love again, or that he would continue to love me like he did; but what I did know, was that he will never leave me alone. Jang Wooyoung will always be apart of Kim So Eun, and there was no escaping from that fact.