"Dude, we were so stupid!" Kyung shrieks as they walked down the road.

         "What do you mean?" Minhyuk raised one eyebrow quizzically.

         "We could've gotten a cab, idiot." Kyung says, then whistles with his hands, yelling for a taxi. 

         "That's not going to wor-" Minhyuk is cut off as he is almost run over by a taxi. Dressed in a pink feather boa, a leopard print jacket and a crimson dress shirt, the driver is hard to miss. He  has large eyes and a bright grin, waving for the two to come in.

       "Bonjour! Parlez vous français sil vous plait!" The man screams in a Chinese accent, long bangs flapping in the wind that smells like warm root beer. The Taxi he drives is decrepit. One of the wheels is covered in duct tape, and so is half the back bumper. There are dents and nicks everywhere, and the passenger door is obviously from another car. The back door is almost falling off and damn does that car need a paint job anda few hundred thousand air fresheners. A worse cab has never been seen.

      "Can't we speak Korean?" Minhyuk asks.

       "Non! Nous allons...nous allons...hell?" Kyung says, scratching his head. He had never been good at French.

       "Okay! Hell it is then. I need to brush up on my French, I don't even know what I just said. By the way, my name is Zhou Mi." Zhou Mi, the driver, chirped in Korean. Kyung and Minhyuk buckled up, hoping the man wasn't as crazy as everyone else. All hopes were dashed as the man floored it.

        "The line to Hell is loooong. We can beat that with- wait for it...DUN DUHN NANA! Ludicrous speed!" Zhou Mi screamed, pulling a lever attached to the ceiling of the beat up taxi. The cab flashes neon colors and Minhyuk feels like an elephant is on his chest. Kyung is screaming something unintelligible but seems happy while Zhou Mi just nods.

         It has become obvious that the three had entered Hell when fire appeared outside of their windows. Ludicrous speed had stopped and Zhou Mi began to play music on the radio. Unluckily Zhou Mi loved disco, so Kyung and Minhyuk were forced to listen to various covers of Boogie Wonderland for thirty minutes straight.

         "Do not be alarmed by the bumps. Those are the heads of visitors who we are running over. Please stay calm and enjoy the ride." Zhou Mi says in a monotone voice. Soon enough they are at the front of the line and Kyung only wants to strangle Zhou Mi a little. The two exit the car at the gates of Hell to see a girl with a half shaved head.

    "Oh it's you two. Honestly, Minhyuk you had so much going for you until high school. Eh, Kyung is definitely wanted here. Anywho, I'm Dara, guardian of the gates of Hell. That is my younger brother Zitao, the one furiously writing down names. So how'd ya die? Car wreck, fight, sickness, aliens..." She trailed off.

     "Look, we're not dead. I am very alive, even though I am dead y. We're just here to rescue princess Jihoon. Can we go in?" Kyung asked, arms flapping in his leather jacket.

       "Sure! You just have to beat the King of Tetris; Heechul! Just jump through that portal, win, and come back and I'll let you two in to get that princess." Dara said, reading through Zitao's notebook. The younger waved.

       "You ready bro?" Minhyuk asked, gulping in fear of the jump. That, and he hated Tetris. Kyung nodded, twisting his Full Service T-shirt. The two counted to three and jumped.

        Upon entering the Tetris Kingdom they were greeted by the smell of cinnamon, bright colors and three cats. The duo (plus those three grey cats) walked down the path to a man in a giant throne next to a giant Tetris game. The man wore a colorful suit and crown, contrasting from his coal colored hair and olive skin.

       "I. AM. HEECHUL. KING OF TETRIS!" The man yells when asked about who he is. "Wanna play?" he adds on to the end, raising a single eyebrow hopefully in an attempt to look sociable. Kyung bravely  odd and Minhyuk just stands there awkwardly.

       The game of Tetris the two played was possibly the most intense game of Tetris ever played in the history of the universe. The player was placed at the bottom and could levitate themselves and the Tetris blocks. Kyung wasn't all that great at Tetris so Minhyuk helped him out a bit. Luckily the two combined brains beat Heechul's and they ended up winning.

    "Alright you win. I lose. Blahity blah blah blah. Insert villain speech here. But could you guys do one tiny thing for me? Could you defeat the Tetris dragon? He's really quite annoying. Just open that door to the left. Use these swords!" Heechul points to a bright door the color of gay after chucking two swords at their heads.

       Inside the room there was a large, blocky dragon. It was various colors, all annoyingly neony bright. It turned out the Tetris dragon was made out of legos. After some hacking with the rusty swords and some pulling apart of dragon limbs, the Tetris/lego dragon is destroyed. Oddly enough, the two boys' unartistic art teacher, Mr. Kris Wu, ran to the pile of disassembled Lego dragon bits. Once the blonde started sobbing the two teens called it quits. Heechul waved bye and the two kids left.

       "So I see you two have swords. I take that as you two won. Henry, Donghae, Kibum, Hangeng, Yesung, Sungmin, Yesung, Leeteuk, Kangin, Shindong, Kyuhyun and Ryeowook! Open the gates my minions!" Dara screamed at twelve men who opened the old rusty gates of Hell.

       Upon entering Lucifer's castle the two nincompoops we have chosen to be 'heroes' were hit by the smell of baked cookies. Then they saw a short, adorable man in a red suit with horns, their science teacher Kim Minseok and a blonde boy in a dress. All three males were playing Egyptian Ratscrew.

      "Give us ba- mphf!" Kyung said as Minhyuk's hand curled around his mouth, silencing him.

    "Why did you, Lucifer, take Princess Jihoon?" Minhyuk asked.

        "The name is Taeil, and I was lonely! Minseok is y company. Besides he always wins at poker." Taeil said with a pout.

       "Oh, I know some new company." Kyung smiled evilly. 

---

        "I wonder why Kyung hasn't shown himself around the neighborhood. He's always up to something, or at least organizing a game of tag." Zico said, blowing on a mouthful of soup. Jaehyo, a senior, took a spoonful of the hot broth.

        "Maybe you love him, that's why you're so irritated." Jaehyo said, blowing on the soup.

       "I-I I do not!" Zico's face turned bright red.

       "Yeah right." Jaehyo swallowed another spoonful of soup.

       "Stop eating my soup! You have a salad, Jaewhore!" Zico almost yelled.

         "But salads are gross."

         "Then why did you order one?"

            "It makes me look healthy." Jaehyo says right before the two are into a portal. It drops them in a bright room with an adorable man in glasses and a chubby-cheeked science teacher. Zico screams at himself mentally, knowing this was all Kyung's fault somehow. 

---

   Kyung and Minhyuk fall into a tree in their neighborhood at six thirty. The sun was setting, coloring the world amber. It was nice to be back home, without dragons or explosions.

    "Minhyuk, time for dinner! How was day one of winter break?" Minhyuk's mom, a middleaged lady with dark brown hair and pleasent eyes, yelled from their red building. Kyung rolls his eyes at the expected response from his mother, which was to ignore anything and everything that he did if possible. She didn't even notice he was gone. 

  "I guess I will be home for dinner." Minhyuk says, climbing out of the tree. 

   "Idiot, this is the fast way down!" Kyung yells as he leaps from the top of the ancient oak, converse pounding into the grass with a loud slam. 

  "Race you home!" Minhyuk yelled at the grinning redhead

Author's note 

Its over!

This story took forever to write. It was tons of fun to write, though it did get a tad tiresome at the end. 

Super huge big giant thanks to SimplyStrange and ChemicalShawol for commenting loads. 

Once I'm done with my kpop battle royale (it has block b in it ^^) I will start another rblock b crack fic. 

Things to remember. 

Jaehyo is a tangerine

Kyung and Minhyuk shouldn't go on a crazy adventure unsupervised. 

Zico loves hello kitty. 

Yukwon is a pug

Taeil is the LUSHIFER

Bye guise!