YUNHO POV

i was woken up by the ringing of my cell phone

"hello?" i answered tiredly and groggily as i slept at 6 in the morning after crying so much

" is this yunho jung?" the person on the other line asked

"yes it is, how may i help you?" i asked still half asleep

"hello, i was bae seul gi's doctor, and..,"

"doctor?"

"yes..you didn't know she had heart failure?"

i bolted out of bed when i heard him

"excuse me?"

"yunho-ssi, i would prefer if we talked at my office in detail,"

"yes sure,"

 after i ended the call i went to get ready and i left 10 minutes later

i drove to the hospital with a worried heart

"excuse me where is dr. kang's office?" i asked a nurse

and she pointed to his office

i walked to his office and found him sitting, expecting him

"please sit yunho ssi," i sat and looked at him

"what is this nonsense about seul gi having heart failure?" i asked

"Well i'm not really supposed to tell anyone about her health..,"

"i'm her boyfriend," i interuppted

"oh, well...do you remember when she came to the hospital because she was found unconcious with a sword wound, well we found that day during surgery she had heart failure, and we told her so i assumed you knew,"

"wait, if you assumed i knew, then why did you call me?" i asked

"well because last night at around midnight she came to my office and dropped these cd off," he said and he took out two cd cases out of his drawers

"i unfortunately wasn't here when she gave it to me but she left me a note telling me to give it to you, only after she died, and i found out she passed away, i'm so sorry,"

i just stared at the cd i was holding in my hands

" Did she die because of her heart failure, or the sword wound?" i asked

"both, honestly she came here like 2 days ago asking me how many dies she has to live and i said approximately 3 days so the sword wound and heart failure both caused her death, if she didn't have heart failure and had that sword wound it would have been possible that she would have been alive," he informed me

"oh...doctor, i got to go, thank you for everything," i said and i smiled a sincere smile

i drove home and when i parked my car right in front of the house

i just rested

i leaned back and rested my arm on my forehead , as tears once again flew down

but i wiped them off quickly " no i need to be happy for seulgi," i said confidently

i put on a fake smile and i looked at the rearview mirror and saw my fake smile "seugi, ill find my real smile again soon, but it will take a while, you will help me right?"

i stayed in the car for a while and i heard knocks on my car window ..i opened my eyes and saw 8 guys/girls staring at me with sad eyes

i got out of the car smiling

"hey guys..i just went to the doctor because a doctor called me saying seulgi left these cd..we should watch it," i said with the cd in my hand

we walked inside and i inserted the cd into the dvd player and on the tv screen seulgi appeared

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=taYeBqSlMHc

"unnie,"

seulgi,"

they whispered when they saw seulgi on the screen

"hey guys, its seulgi...when you guys watch this, i'm probably dead," she chuckled

" well...for starters..there is something that i haven't told you guys yet..umm..well, do you guys remember when i went to the hospital because i was found unconsious on the streets..that day i found out i had heart failure..." she said hesitantly

the room was silent and cold

"unnie," the younger girls said starting to tear

"i..i didn't want to tell you because i knew you guys would get worried..you forgive this unnie for not telling you right?" seulgi asked still smiling

seulgi started tearing..and her sadness is breaking my heart "seulgi," i murmered

she wiped her tears "i remember the day we girls met at the hospital, i remember we connected because we had the same pain," she said as tears rolled

"and boa unnie didn't open up to me until we lived together, i remember the day we became sisters..best friends, and we cried together, laughed together, shared secrets with each other..ah good times huh?"

" because of this useless girl..you guys shed so much tears and a lot of blood..those men were after to kill me if only we didn't meet you guys wouldn't be in so much pain right now. i..i'm sorry..this useless girl wasn't able to protect you guys....you guys forgive me though...rite?" she asked as her sobs began to grow

the now 4 shattered heartbroken girls fell to the floor as the sister they loved the most couldn't speak as she was sobbing into her hand...

we guys tried to stay strong but we couldn't help but shed tears as well

i broke down crying

" and my wonderful oppas who made me and the girls smile everyday....oppas i shouldn't have brought you guys in this mess..i hate to take responsibility for the tears you shed..b..but i k..know i'm responsible..oppas do you remember the first day we met? the first day we met...we......,"

seulgi was crying nonstop..seeing her sad face just broke me "SEULGI!" I  yelled bitterly

screaming and wailing continued to echo in the living room

"we first started o..on the wrong foot but later i grew to love my d..dorky oppas...you guys shone so much..you gave my girls so much happiness..you gave me happiness...i'm sorry...i'm sorry,"

seulgi just kept apologizing

junsu..yoochun..changmin..and jaejoong hyung were kneeling on the floor next to their lover and were wailing

i started to sob louder "seulgi!" i yelled

"yunho oppa!"

i looked at the screen in surprise

"oppa....i left you that night..i left you that night because i knew i would end up dead but i wanted to kill myself because i didn't want you to blame your dad..your probably calling me stupid but oppa..i want you to be happy with a family,"

seulgi..you don't get it do you..you are my happiness...no one else...you..these girls..my boys..they are my family

"oppa...i truly loved you and please forgive and forget me..please its whats best for you..."

the screen turned black but we continued to cry

seulgi..my angel....you knew from the start of the dark path you had to face but you continued to dash forward

seulgi i don't blame you you were my sunshine...my happiness

for you i will let go of this unbearable pain and finally live a happy life...

i love you my sweet heart

SEULGI POV

i looked at my weeping loved ones

i was up above, observing the torn crying friends of mine  that broke my heart

you really don't know how apologetic i am

i love you guys really...and i'm really sorry for leaving you guys

i'm sorry really..just know i'm doing well and i'm happy..yunho oppa

i love you immensly and i'm sorry i wasn't able to show you my love as much

i'm sorry, be happy...and let go of the unbearable pain you guys hold

"noona,"

"seulgi-yah"

i looked behind and saw my family waiting for me

before i left i turned around one last time "be happy...and don't feel anymore pain...i love you,"