Hankyung flinched .He looked up to see Heechul crashing the two cars again and again still shouting ,playing with them.... lost in his world.

His eyes were fixed on the cars as they collide with each other. He shivered as It all came back to him. All the images crystal clear ,like it had happened only yesterday. Images from that night...

Heechul’s words..his eyes..hurt  expressions on his face..that apology which he never heard…those blinding headlights…the frustration when he knew nothing else could be done as he frantically tried to move the steering wheel… the fear as he waited for the impact, his mind full of thoughts of nothing else but..Heechul....

The pain in his heart as he heard him scream his name…the surprise when he felt his soft touch as he tried to drape his slim body over his….He wanted to look into those chocolaty eyes and caress the soft skin once ..But then.... it came...

He was floating..the silence was soothing…It felt like vacuum…There were no worries... no thoughts ..everything was serene..so peaceful..

But suddenly he was surrounded with smoke..he tried to fight it..those awakening senses as smoke reached his nostrils..pulling him back to reality..

He coughed as he opened his eyes ....It took him few seconds to realize where he was…he winced as he felt pain in his left side... dull at first..Then it came with full force… He wanted to scream as swift waves of pain filled his body reaching towards his brain... bringing full realization of the situation…

“Heechul…”he whispered trying to look around ,smoke burning his eyes.

“HEECHUL….”he shouted, frantically trying to move ignoring all the pain..a faint cry, scream, some movement…  SOMETHING..he wanted something ,some sign of the other..!!

At the back of mind he was relieved because Heechul was very particular about seatbelt ,unlike him…But he screamed in horror when he remembered the warmth and softness of the body hugging him protectively just before the accident..

“No no no……..”He cried in panic when he finally spotted him..his precious..Lying  away from the car..motionless..his silky hairs and beautiful face drenched in crimson blood…dark against his milky skin…

He screamed in agony…trying to reach his love..he screamed till he tasted Iron in his mouth….till the mangled figure in front of him became blur as everything started to blackened… and he started to float again…

Faint sound of sirens  coming from far away was his last sensation….then everything was calm again. 

He was walking ..he couldn’t recognize the surroundings properly but  it looked like his apartment. The whole place was filled with comforting white light..giving a very pleasant feeling.He was looking for something... someone ..who?..yeah Heechul..where was he?

A soft smiled broke on his lips when he saw him.

He was standing at the window his eyes closed, his hands resting on the window frame. His milky white skin was glowing in the rays of sun, silky hair flowing with the wind..There was a peaceful smile on his face as the soft fabric of curtains caressed his face.

“Heechul..”His voice came as a soft whisper.

But Heechul heard him as he turned to look at him. bright smile still on his face..his eyes soft and filled with joy.  

Hankyung smiled...... but his smile vanished as soon as expressions on the others face changed.

Confused he looked as Heechul’s smile changed into fear…

“No don’t come near me…”he shouted.

“What ? It’s just  me”He stated worriedly taking a step ahead.

“NO I said don’t come near me…..”Heechul screamed.

“There is no need to get scared... it just me...it’s me princess”he talked as he took steps towards the other.

“NO..NO..Stay away.”Heechul yelled as he started to move backwards..his big feline eyes were filled with insecurity .

In a flip second entire scene changed...

They were standing on a cliff now.Cold winds were flowing furiously .... darkness surrounded the entire place.

Heechul was still moving away from him.

“No wait… Don’t go any further “He watched in horror as Heechul reached the edge of the cliff.

“Don’t come near me…..”Heechul’s voice was like a low murmur. .his face still like a frightened 5 year old, his eyes widen in fear…

“Look out”Hakyung yelled as Heechul disappeared from the edge...he tried reaching for the slim body.But his hands grasped air…It was too late....

“HEECHUL….”His voice filled the dark atmosphere , cracking the cold silence…..

Hankyung  flipped open his eyes.his vision still  blur..his head heavy.

“Nightmare….. it was all a nightmare……”He thought to himself relieved.

Until the dark memories of accident came to him..mangled figure in front of his eyes, drenched in blood...staining the milky white skin…Heechul.

“Heechul”He shouted jerking up.

“Hankyung…”He heard his mother from his side.

“Mama ,where is Heechul?How is he?..There was so much blood ,how is he?”He asked ,his voice desperate.

His heart sank looking at his mother’s expression.

“Mama...why aren’t you talking..I ..I need to find him “he said trying to get up.

“kyungie…NO..You need o rest ,stay calm…”his mother said worried.

“But mama…appa…where is Heechul….?”He asked when he saw his appa entering the room hearing all the voices.

“Why aren’t you guys telling me…where is my Heechul?”He shouted as he couldn’t get answer from anyone of them.

He watched as his parents looked at each other,their faces worried.He was getting scared....what if…??

“NO….”He shouted as that thought cross his mind.

“NO..NO..he’s ok right..I need to see him…”He said while trying, getting up from his bed.His body was protesting but he had to move, he needed to know Heechul is alright.

“Han…”He heard a new voice and felt a pair of hands trying to constrain him. He looked up.

“Siwon…”

That name ..That face brought memories..not the time he had spent with him..no..not of guilty pleasure he craved for.

Those were of the damage it had caused to his relationship…with Heechul..their arguments..his harsh words..those tears…that beautiful face covered in blood..

“Heechul….I need to see him……”He whispered, looking at the other, his mind still occupied with bitter memories.

“You need to calm down first….”Siwon said pushing him down the bed.

“But…...I need to….”He tried to protest.

Siwon looked at Hankyung’s parents.

“Look..I will tell you,But you need to stay calm..ok?”he said trying to decide what to say.

“He’s  critical..”He stated.

Hankyung heard each word desperately.

“Doctors said it’s severe brain injury.....”Siwon talked slowly...carefully observing him as he talked.

He continued when he got no reaction from other.

“They performed a surgery but it was complicated..They are waiting for a brain surgeon now..he’s said to be best in his field....”

Critical....Severe..Complicated...

Hankyung tried to process the words in his mind...Each of which was killing him..his princess..his beautiful bratty Rella..What have he done....?

He started to shake violently as his mind absorbed the whole impact.....

“What have I done....He didn’t deserve this.....”His cries filled the small hospital room.

His parents were trying to control him..but he was no position to listen to anyone..His heart was filled with pain....so much pain..

“I need to see him...”He managed to say in between sobs. One glimpse.... he wanted at least one small glimpse of that face.

“I SAID I NEED TO SEE HIM........”He yelled at top of his voice when he got no response from anyone of them...

His mind was clouded as he was being wheeled at that room. That room..He was there...his Heechul..He is there...But he was scared now...his bubbly ,full of life lover...He was lying there now... probably motionless...how can he bear to watch him like this......what have he done...WHAT have I done...........his mind screamed in agony as the he neared the room...

He was there..his Heechul was there.......

“He is there..I am going to see him..he is alive......” He thought, his attention to the door in front of him...Suddenly frantic beeps broke the overall silence,setting him in a panic..Confused he watched as team of doctors moved in the room..what was going on...?

“We can’t wait anymore...we have to do it today....”He heard one of them.

“Doctor...”he tried to get hold of them.

“What...what is going on...?Is he...”He couldn’t complete his questions as the mere thought scared him to death.

“We will try our best son...But we have to hurry.”One of the elderly doctor assured him.

Hankyung watched helplessly as they moved away quickly...everything was in haze for him after that...He was not sure if he saw Heechul’s face as he was being rolled out in operation theatre..He was not sure if he felt the cold touch of those soft slender hands as he held them ....he was not sure about how much time had passed since he sat outside that room staring at that red lit up bulb....

He was not sure about anything that was happening..He was not sure that he was awake..was he still dreaming...?

He was not sure if he was breathing......

‘5 %’ they had told him .....

5% were the chances they could save him..his Heechul.

5%..his whole life depended upon that number now..

5 %..He clenched on this number with his dear life.

Heechul hated hospitals...he remembered as he sat in that cold corridor..denying every attempt of Siwon and his parents or the doctors to get him to his room.

He remembered last time when he had to drag the other here.

It was on his last birthday.....

Apparently Heechul had tried to bake a cake for him and had burned his hand pretty badly in the process.

Fortunately Hankyung had come just in time...Sure Heechul was in great pain but he had managed to whine about  going to hospital, curse the oven and the cookbook of course and whine some more....

“It was that stupid oven....”Heechul had huffed as doctor was taking look at his hand.

They were finally at hospital.

Though dead worried, Hankyung could not help but laugh..he had heard this about hundreds of times now in last one hour or so....

“Oven is just fine...I have used it many times.......”He said in mischievous tone.

Heechul glared at him..a innocent pout apparent on his face...

“That was dangerous ...You need to be more careful Chullie...”Hankyung said worriedly.

“I know Hannie...It looked pretty simple till the book said to mix this and add that...It even tasted good....my precious white chocolate...but then that stupid oven ruined it....”Heechul winced as doctor tried to apply some ointment on the burn.

“Don’t tell me you were baking a white chocolate cake for my birthday....I don’t even like it........”Hankyung tried to distract him from pain.

“Hmmm..But I love it..and you love me..so you must love the cake also.......”Heechul managed to say.

Hankyung smiled. He was used to these kind of reasoning..However childish and bratty these may sound...there was always a warm and innocent touch to it.

“I am sorry..I didn’t want to celebrate your birthday like this..I just wanted to surprise you ...I wanted to do something special just for you. ” Heechul stated looking apologetic.

“I don’t think you had to do anything for that..because you are special to me..You were the most precious gift that I got a long back..my own princess doll....”Hankyung commented pinching others nose.

“Awwww..That was cheesy....and who are you calling a doll?I am no doll..And how many times I have told you not to call me princess anymore...we are not school kids now..You know how much I hat.......”

Yeah...By now...in all these years Hankyung had found out way to shut Kim Heechul up.The kiss was simple and sweet.

“You can’t cook...princess.”Hankyung laughed as Heechul pouted.

“Han....”He flinched as he heard someone calling him ,a smile still plastered on his face as he remembered the incident..those sweet memories.

Siwon was looking worriedly at him.

“Are you alright.......??”He heard him ask. Confused he nodded. The red bulb was still glowing...

He watched as Siwon took a seat next to him, placing a hand on his shoulder.

“Take some rest..This..what you are doing is not good for your health.....And it was not your fault you know, if he would have wearing the seatbelt..Probably this wouldn’t have been this bad for him..So don’t blame yo....”

“He would nag me about it you know..no... you don’t know...He would eat my head telling me to wear the seatbelt, but I ignored it most of the time...But he would still nag every time when he wore it tightly around him..Well that’s Heechul for you...I am sure he would have nagged that day also if......”  He chocked.

“And if he would have nagged I would have wore it..and then he wouldn’t............”

There were many if’s and then’s ...many would have and could have’s...but nothing could change the reality...the red bulb that was still glowing..the 5% of hope..such a small number .

“WHY...why did you do that..why after all things I did?” He suddenly yelled looking at closed operation theatre door.

“what the hell were you thinking.... draping over me like that ....you stupid brat..How could you be so immature..?.”

His agonized cries cracked the hospital silence...The red bulb was still glowing.......

“Why...?”

I just wrote a flashback inside a flashback :D

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