Blinding lights. Steady beeping of machines. Shuffling of papers and inaudible muttering. Sanha's eyes slowly opened and turned her head to see a nurse sitting in a chair beside her with medical files in front of her. She looked back up to the ceiling and felt tears building in the corner of her eyes. Her vision blurred and she felt the cool tears slowly fall down her face. For the first time in a long time, Sanha felt the weight of the world lift off of her shoulders. She felt free. A little whimper passed from her lips and the nurse looked up and saw that Sanha was awake. The nurse stood up and looked at the machine before reaching for the painkillers that were hooked up to her arm. Sanha shook her head and looked up at the nurse who seemed very confused.

"I...feel....great..." Sanha felt like was coated with sand. The nurse nodded at her as if she understood. In the end the nurse wound up pressing the button for the painkillers and Sanha quickly drifted back asleep. She felt weightless. As if everything she was experiencing was a dream. The next time she woke up it was darker in her room and the nurse was gone. The door opened and in walked her father, mother and Eunkwang. When Sanha laid her eyes upon her family tears instantly filled her eyes again. Her family rushed over to her and stood by her bed side. Her father kissed the top of her head, her mother held her left hand while Eunkwang held her right hand. "Is this..a dream?" felt a lot better but she still sounded like a deflating tire whenever she tried to speak.

"No sweetheart....you're awake, and completely healthy." Her mom started to cry as well. Eunkwang was forcing his tears back and her father just kept patting the top of her head. "You were so strong baby...so strong." She kissed the top of Sanha's hand, right over the IV that was stabbed into her. Sanha closed her eyes tightly and clenched her grip on her mom and brothers hands.

It all felt so unreal. So unnatural. Yet so very right. Sanha spent the next five hours with her parents before they went off to get her some things from home and to get Eunkwang some food since he had come straight from a showcase of their new single. Eunkwang laid in the bed beside Sanha and told her all about what had happened during and after the surgery. He apologised for not being able to come when she had been rushed to the hospital.

"Don't worry. I didn't even know what was going on."

"Still, I should have been there."

"You couldn't have helped me Eunkwanggie oppa...this was going to happen sooner or later." Sanha placed her hand on top of Eunkwangs and looked at how big his hand was compared to hers. She didn't know when it happened, but Eunkwang had become a man before her eyes. She could still remember him crying as they walked home together because he couldn't protect her from scrapping her knee. Sanha doesn't even remember if it hurt, but she didn't cry. Eunkwang always seemed to cry for her, but now he was strong and putting on a brave face for the both of them.

"Sanha..it got leaked..." Eunkwang couldn't bring himself to look at her. He drew his hand away from her and ruffled his hair that was still hard and sticky from all of the product that the hair stylists had put in it. Sanha looked at him confused and she flinched when she heard loud voices coming down the hallway. "About you and Daehyun....his company said you two were a couple. Your face, name and everything about you is posted on the internet for everyone to see....I'm so sorry Sanha." Eunkwang stood up out of the bed just as the door burst open and all of BtoB plus their managers, came stumbling into the room with flowers and gifts.

"SANHA!" They all screamed and the boys came running over to her. Eunkwang stepped in front of them and protected Sanha from her fan boys.

"HYUNG MOVE! I WANT TO HUG HER!" Sungjae whined and ducked around Eunkwang and hugged Sanha a little too tightly. When she winced in pain Eunkwang and Hyunsik ripped Sungjae off of her and forced him to stand in the corner for a few minutes as punishment. One by one, the boys gave her their presents until only Ilhoon was left. He had a small stuffed black bunny with large blue eyes. Ilhoon placed the rabbit on the side table and leaned close to Sanha. He closed his eyes and placed a soft kiss on the corner of Sanha's lips, sending chills through her body. If she had never met Daehyun and never fell in love with him, Sanha knew that Ilhoon would be the man for her. It was as if Ilhoon was her soul mate but Daehyun was her one true love. Two very important people who she loves deeply. Ilhoon brought his head up and rested his forehead on Sanha's forehead before letting out a little chuckle.

"You scared me Sanha...never do that again, idiot." Ilhoon kissed her forehead before stepping away and avoiding Eunkwangs fist that came flying at him. Sanha giggled as her parents came back and talked friendly with all of the boys. Eunkwang came back over to Sanha's side while everyone was busying talking with each other.

"They said we were a couple?" Sanha asked in a whisper and Eunkwang nodded his head while fiddling with the scratchy hospital blanket that was a weird blue and only made people look more sick than they actually were. He put it on his mental list to bring Sanha a proper blanket. "So...how is he doing? His fans must be upset...I feel bad for him." Sanha hung her head and clench her fists making the IV's dig into her hands even more. Eunkwang slowly nodded his head again while looking at Sanha. He couldn't deny the fact that Daehyun had been bombarded with hate mail from his fans and that B.A.P had taken a hit from the publicity. "I can't see him anymore oppa..." Sanha lifted her head and looked Eunkwang in the eyes. "I can't hurt him anymore....I've done too much to him already." Eunkwang couldn't deny this and felt a little bad for knowing that their relationship couldn't end well from the beginning.

"It's okay Sanha...we all understand." Eunkwang rubbed her back and tried to comfort her without rubbing the fact that he was right in her face. For four days Sanha had trouble sleeping and keeping any sort of concentration on a task. Days flew by and she didn't hear a peep from Daehyun and refused to hear any news about him or B.A.P, she was trying to cut him completely out of her life.

~~~~~~~~~~~

"Excuse me, I'm here to see Seo Sanha." Daehyun held a small bouquet of white lilies at his side while he stood at the nurses desk. He was smiling so hard he felt like the corners of his mouth were going to rip any second. The nurse looked at him for a long while before looking down at the sheets down on the desk. She looked back up at him and tried not to sound like a complete idiot.

"It was the third door on the left, but-" She was cut off as Daehyun nodded and headed straight to the door he was directed towards. The nurse called out to him but Daehyun ignored her. He couldn't wait to see Sanha again. Once he heard that she was alive he dropped what he was doing to come and see her. He didn't know why the news took so long to reach him but he heard from his managers that she had survived the surgery and was currently recovering at the hospital. He opened the door only to be greeted by the sound of rustling curtains. The bed was empty and neatly made. The room was spotless and the window was open, letting in the fresh air to try and purify the room of its strong bleach smell.

"Um..excuse me." Daehyun looked around the hall before walking back to the nurse who was nervously biting her lip. "Are you sure it's that room? It's empty." He nervously passed the bouquet back and forth in his hands, a habit he picked up since he became a singer and constantly had to handle a microphone.

"As I was trying to tell you before, she WAS in that room but she left early this morning." The nurse heard someone calling for her and excused herself.

"Wait...can I use the phone?" Daehyun reached over the desk, his hand already hovering of the phone. The nurse gave him a thumbs up before disappearing into a room.  Daehyun dialed Sanha's house number and listened to the phone ring. He felt a little embarrassed for coming all this way with flowers, but he was just glad she was alive.

"Hello?" A familiar voice said. Sanha sounded groggy, like she had just woken up from a nap. Daehyun let out a sigh of relief. He thought that he was never going to hear her voice again.

"Hey. I didn't know they released you from the hospital. You're at your house right? I'll come right over." Daehyun couldn't stop smiling at the thought of seeing and holding her again.

"No." Her voice was cold and a little unnatural.

"Huh? You're not at your house? Than where are you?" Daehyun smelled the flowers and watched as the nurse left from one room and quickly scurried into another.

"No you can't come see me. Just go back to your dorm Daehyun." Sanha had a hard time saying these words, but she knew that they needed to be said. It was better to break things off now than months down the road when they were both deeply invested.

"Why not? I don't care if you don't have make up on or if you still can't get out of your bed. I want to see you. I love you Sanha." Daehyun held on tighter to the phone. Something felt wrong. Something felt off. Sanha was different.

"Don't call me again. I don't want to see you ever again." Sanha hung up the phone and stared at it blankly, finally allowing the tears to fall down her face. She hugged the phone to her chest and cried as hard as she could without it being painful. "I love you so much Daehyun...please...just leave me alone." Sanha leaned back on her pillow and covered her eyes with the back of her hand. She didn't feel like she deserved to see be bathed in sunlight when she felt so broken inside.

"Sanha? SANHA?!" Daehyun hung up the phone and tried calling again but it just kept ringing and going to her voice mail. The nurse finally came out of the room but when she saw Daehyun, she walked back in the room pretending to be busy. The fifth time he got her voice mail, he decided to leave a message hoping that she would listen to it and not just delete it right away. "Sanha, I don't know what is going on with you right now. But I love you and I know you love me too. Don't give up on us because I will never give up on you." He hung up and looked at the meaningless flowers in his hand. He throw them on the ground, the lilies petals now showered across the hospital floor. He was never going to give up on her. Daehyun knew no matter how long he had to wait, he would see her again. He didn't care what it took, but Daehyun was determined to be with Sanha again, no matter the cost.

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Poor DaeDae