Ryeowook didn’t particularly fancy speaking up – he’d rather end up as the misunderstood boy instead of clearing things up. Actually, there weren’t many things to be said, and if there were, he was insecure about voicing them. In his past, instead of craving for popularity, he desired to be a nobody. Really, who cares for nobodies? Unfortunately, he was average, not unseen to cruel eyes that could possibly harm him. Ryeowook admitted that he was pathetic, but he at least wanted to change. Though it wasn’t as simple as he wished it was. Perhaps because he was warming up to Kyuhyun again meant he could have hopes of returning to the way it used to be.


However, he shouldn’t be too hopeful.


Saturdays always managed to be boring, mostly because Ryeowook spent them at home doing absolutely nothing. There were no lessons, because he already made all of them yesterday. The shows airing on television during evening were even more boring. A yawn ran past his mouth, as he cogitated if the idea of going to bed, even though it was still 3:27 pm, was a good one. Lazily, he marched upstairs while heading to his bedroom. Once he stepped inside the room, his eyes caught the sight of the box that contained so many memories. Ryeowook bit his lower lip, face painted with uncertainness, until he decided it was time to make something for himself. As he rummaged through his belongings, he finally found an old piece of old paper slightly crumpled with messy letters.


Before he could read what was written in it, he heard the phone ringing downstairs. Ryeowook ran all the way down, abandoning the old paper on the couch as he went to answer it. “Hi?” he questioned waiting for the other person to say something.


“Hey Ryeowook” the deep voice speaking to him made the young male quite startled, Ryeowook always wondered why Kyuhyun’s voice sounded so good while his was just high pitched. It made him rather envious.


Noticing he had not answered right after made him feel rather strange – why the other had to call anyway?


“Why you called?” Ryeowook blurted out suddenly panicking afraid of it sounding ruder than he wanted – it was not like he hated receiving calls, but he did hate speaking on the phone. Mostly because of his complex regarding his high pitched voice, also because he was unable to see the other person’s expressions in order to decide whether he should speak something or not.


“So direct!” Kyuhyun feigned to be offended, until he playfully answered the reason which made Ryeowook relieved. “I am bored. So I decided to bother you, since I was unable to do so in the last years” Kyuhyun made up that reason for bothering the other, since he had to keep the talk going on, otherwise Ryeowook would just hung up saying a monotonous ‘bye’.


“Can’t do anything. Deal with it just like I do.” Ryeowook flatly answered, a frown adorning his features as he wondered what kind of expression the other was making – chatting on the phone was more like a game of guessing the other’s reaction.


“Well, want me to go there and end with our boredom?” Kyuhyun flirting way of speaking made the other to be momentarily flabbergasted, until Ryeowook rolled his eyes annoyed of how the other played so dangerously.


“You can’t even take care of your own boredom, how do you expect me to believe you’d end mine instead of worsening it?” Ryeowook allowed witty answers to come out, because when he spoke to Kyuhyun everything seemed so natural. Perhaps it was because Kyuhyun miraculously managed to keep the mood light, or because they were best friends before.


“Touché.” Kyuhyun complimented his answer, hastily chuckling afterwards. “But you have to admit I brighten everyone’s day” Kyuhyun spoke making the other chuckle at his conceited act.


“Thanks for helping with my boredom then, just by talking with me” Ryeowook slightly as he played with the hem of his shirt waiting for the other to say something stupid again and successfully make him smile.


“Now you need to help me as well” Kyuhyun stubbornly demanded as he feigned to yawn out of boredom.


“Do your homework that will keep you busy for a while”


Kyuhyun frowned at how good Ryeowook was getting at retorting his statements. He simply chuckled as he finally decided they had enough of chitchatting. “Fine, mom. I’ll go immediately” Kyuhyun mocked the other as he didn’t have how to counter his answer.


“Just go already.” Ryeowook grumbled impatiently as the other laughed and told his farewells. “Fine. See you on Monday then! Bye” Kyuhyun absently answered as he hung up before waiting for any answer coming from the other.


Ryeowook stared skeptically at the phone, indignant that the other hung up before allowing him to at least say his farewells. Suddenly, the corner of his lips curved into a small smile. Ever since they exchanged numbers correctly, Kyuhyun would frequently call just to talk about nothing. Maybe ‘the gamer’ as he used to be addressed, turned out to be a very perceptive person – this would explain his need to constantly talk with Ryeowook, knowing something happened when they were apart.


On the other hand, Ryeowook also knew a lot have happened while he was away so he had to catch up. But how would he when Kyuhyun himself refused to speak about the reason for being strangely scared of insects. Sometimes it felt that even though they were comfortably talking with each other, they weren’t close to each other as they should be. Of course Ryeowook was also secretive regarding his past, but if the other confided him about his issues, he’d do the same.


Ryeowook felt grateful that even though he would remain silent sometimes, Kyuhyun still kept accompanying him on school, even though the other had so many friends to walk around with. It was comfortable, he felt safe for once even if some eyes would rest on him when they were together. It was Kyuhyun’s effect on him: a calming one. Such thing actually triggered a particular thought inside his mind: did he still love the other boy?


There was absolutely no answer for that, since the years being apart did change most of things in them. Not only aspects regarding their appearance, but also their personalities. Ryeowook wasn’t sure if what he felt for the other was enviousness towards Kyuhyun’s entire being or if it was a silly infatuation due to his admiration. Heck, they barely knew each other for it to be considered as anything other than a growing friendship.


So, Ryeowook decided to ignore this thought – what he needed in the moment wasn’t love, but friends. Though things would never return to how they used to be, Ryeowook just wants to enjoy his moment with his childhood friends. As his thoughts averted to Donghae and Eunhyuk, he chuckled – despite growing up those two remained the same when it was related to their mentality, always so childish. The friendship between those two was deserving of being envied – those two were inseparable.



Time passed for everyone, but he was probably the one who changed the most – being isolated for so long was the main reason. His mind would always play tricks on him, inquiring what he made to recover himself. However, the only answer that replayed was: Nothing. He did absolutely nothing aside from lying down all day on his bed, refusing to go out. In the past, he even pondered whether to leave school or not. Luckily, his parents were against it and fought for him, since he wouldn’t do so.


Change was needed. And it needed to be fast. Perhaps seeing a psychologist wasn’t a bad idea. He should search for one on Monday.


Suddenly, his deep thoughts were interrupted by his mother. “Ryeowook, could you go to the supermarket and buy a few things for me?” His mother suddenly appeared coming from the kitchen holding a small list, he nodded and got the keys from his house ready to go.


Only one thing was forgotten: the crumpled old paper dumped on the couch.