“The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.”

― Mahatma Gandhi

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Amicus es. - Latin, You are a friend.

 

 

 

 

Shock was painted all over Seungho's face as he silently wait for Joon's confession. Seunghyun left the two men alone to give them privacy. 

 

 

 

“Eunji was my girlfriend when I knocked up Aeri...”

 

 All of Joon's confidence got -up, shame filling every single part of him, as he uttered that detestable statement.

 

He shifted his look from Seungho's eyes to his shoes as he continued to narrate...

 

"She has been my girlfriend since 4^th year college."

 

Joon looked Seungho in the eyes, and spoke: 

 

"I loved her...I really did..."

 

Joon let out a sigh before shifting his eyes back to the ground again. 

 

"But as the months went by, I got bored with how things went on between us. Out of my carelessness, I started exploring new things...I started partying every night after work, without her knowing, so that I can monkey up without getting reprimanded nor nagged. And then I met you, and we did crazy stuff together...”

 

Joon paused for a while then sighed before he lifted his eyes to look at Seungho before he continued...

 

“I didn't want to tell you about her because you might tell her about my secret life...I know she is nice and all, and she wouldn't mind if I go out on my own partying all night. But knowing her, I know she wouldn't allow me to do crazy stuff...And at that time, being the that I am, I didn't want her to meddle on my way of doing things. So I kept it from her."

 

Joon's eyes shifted back to the ground again...

 

“And before I knew it, things got wild and it eventually got out of hand...I met Aeri, had a one-night-stand, and the rest is history...”

 

 

Seungho just sat there silently as he tried to digest everything, looking intently at Joon who was massaging his temples at that time, his hands still shaking a bit out of anxiousness.

 

"How could you do this man? To us, to Eunji....Keeping her in the dark for 3 years....3 freakin years! And as if that wasn't enough, you had to sleep with other woman..." Seungho couldn't help but raise his voice at Joon's recklessness.

 

After minutes of silence, Seungho stood up. 

 

“That's just low man...” Seungho uttered in a cold tone before he left Joon.

 

 

Joon could not muster up the courage to look at his disappointed friend, so he just let him leave. Joon knows what he did was unforgivable - he couldn't even find a reason to forgive himself! And so he wasn't expecting forgiveness from his friends anytime soon.

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Seungho's silence contradicted the noise of various thoughts running through his mind as he walked back to the office: thoughts of what Joon did and how he contributed to it, the pain Eunji must be going through right now, how sorry he felt for Eunji, and more. He took a deep sigh, allowing his mind to be freed of random thoughts at the moment, before he walked towards his office. He passed by Eunji's cubicle as if nothing happened, sparing her the trouble of being tortured by her past memory.

 

It was as if fate was at work when Seungho and Eunji was left alone ater office hours. Seungho, with much hesitation,  insisted to drive Eunji home (using her car). Eunji complied after much difficulty.

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The drive home was silent. They remained silent until they reached Eunji's home.

 

Unable to contain himself anymore, Seungho broke the silence.

 

“Joon told me everything about the two of you and...”

 

“It's a thing of the past. Lets's not talk about it anymore. He moved on, I moved on. And besides, I already forgave him. So there's nothing to talk about anymore.”

 

Awkward silence.

 

“You said you forgave him, but you still act this way. Be true to yourselft Eunji.” Seungho sounded pissed at Eunji's actions. 

 

“I am... I already forgave him. I know he has his reasons for doing what he did. I am probably too boring as a girlfriend...” Eunji smiled as tears fell from her eyes.

 

Seungho took a glance at Eunji and saw that tear falling on her thigh. This made Seungho more agitated, thus he shifted his body to face Eunji.

 

“WHY DO YOU THINK OF YOURSELF THAT WAY?! IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT EUNJI! HE'S AN ! HE DESERVES TO SUFFER AFTER EVERYTHING HE DID TO YOU! DON'T LET HIM OUT THAT EASILY IF YOU DON'T FIND IT IN YOUR HEART TO DO SO!” Seungho shouted at Eunji, hoping to bring the sense out of her.

 

Eunji looked at him with sadness overflowing from her eyes. “You think I don't know that, huh?"

 

Seungho's agitation was replaced by guilt when he saw the overflow of sadness in Eunji's eyes at his harsh words. "I...I'm sorry..."

 

"It's not your fault things happened..." Eunji replied, her voice shaking a bit. 

 

Seungho sighed. His searched for the right words to say to comfort Eunji, but he just couldn't. "He needs to get the treatment he desrves." 

 

Eunji, with teary eyes, looked at Seungho and said, "After everything we've been through, I just can't stay angry at him...." Eunji's lips trembled as she tried to control her sobs.

 

"...It was a mistake, as he claimed, and I saw how he repented. It still pains me seeing him and being reminded of his unfaithfulness, but I have to move on... I have to move on somehow, for what is done is done. I have to forgive and let him live his life. I have a life to live too...I cannot go on with all those baggages with me, I had to let it go... I know Joon commited a grave mistake, but I had shortcomings too..." Eunji stated in a soft voice.

 

“But still...” Seungho still tried to argue, but Eunji cut him off.

 

“I don't want to imprison myself in pain, anger and resentment. I don't want to remain burdened by the guilt of having them plead for my forgiveness everytime I see them. Yes, I wouldn't be able to forget what they have done that easily... It might take a while for me to forget.... It might take a while for me to give my trust back to them...But I would not allow myself to be imprisoned in anger and resentment when I know for a fact that it'll just take away my peace of mind. Life just goes on...I have to move on, one way or another. As long as I free myself from the chains of resentment, and free them from the weight of guilt of my unforgiveness, then we can all live our lives peacefully. And who knows, we might end up being good friends someday...”

 

Seungho was silent, stunned by her fierce statemet. He gave a pitying look at this woman, who succeded in putting up an image of a fierce girl but in reality is a delicate, soft-hearted woman who gave love relentlessly even if it means getting herself hurt in the process. 

 

After minutes of deadly silence, Eunji spoke, looking at Seungho with pleading eyes, “Seungho, just forgive and free yourself.”

 

Seungho was caught off guard. Those were the words that he didn't want to hear.

 

He looked away from Eunji and, with head bowed down, he said,

 

“Don't you meddle with my business.” His voice was deep and trembling a bit due to anger. 

 

Eunji's eyes widened in shock as she digested his words. That was the last thing she expected to hear from him. All this time, she thought this man to whom she has revealed herself is a good friend; but turns out the friendship was not mutual. Eunji, with a stern voice, said “Very well then. Let's not meddle with each other's business.” Anger and frustration lingered in her voice. She took the car keys, stepped out of the car, entered the gate and slammed the door shut, leaving Seungho alone in the car. 

 

Seungho bit his lower lip, realizing that his words were harsh and unmeant. But the beans were spilled and there's no way back.

 

Seungho gave out a loud sigh, as he tried to relieve his chest of intense dissapointmen to himself and regret after what he said. He stepped out of the car and stood in front of Eunji's gate for a while. He looked up in the starless sky as he tried to calm himself down.

 

This is one difficult obstacle to pass, he thought.

 

After a while, he started walk away to get a cab. He stared blankly on the ground as his mind processed the conversation he just had.

 

He was so preoccupied with his thoughts, that he didn't notice a group of 3 men approaching him. Two of the men scooped and locked Seungho's arms with theirs while holding his shoulder. Seungho's adrenaline shoot up, and he immediately elbowed one of the man holding him on his stomach, while punching the other man on his face. Seungho's actions agitated the third stranger, thus giving Seungho a punch on the face that made Seungho fall on his back. The two other men quickly stood up and grabbed Seungho's arm, while the third man showered Seungho with punches in the stomach and ribs. Seungho winced as he received the blows, but he still mustered up the energy to kick the man n front of him. The man quickly dodged his attack. Seungho's stubborness made this 3rd man furious, so he quickly grabbed a knife from his back and plunged the knife to Seungho's right abdomen. Seungho screamed in pain as he looked at the culprit's face, but the man just gave him a sinister smile. He pluged the knife deeper, making Seungho moan as he clenched his teeth in pain. Without any warning, the man pulled out the knife as the two other men let go of Seungho's arm making him fall down to the ground. They took his wallet and cellphone, then ran away.

 

Seungho lay down on his side as he clutched on his bleeding abdoomen. His breathing got faster as the pain intensfied. It was past 1 am, and the road was empty. Seungho felt his hope run out as he realized how impossible it is to get help on an empty street in the middle of the night. He lay on his back and looked at the sky, hoping to gaze at the starlit sky for the last time before he leave humanity. All of a sudden, a smiling Eunji flashed in his mind, making him smile.

 

Then he realized something, 'This pain is nothing compared to the pain I've caused you.' With that, he closed his eyes as he submerged into a deep sleep.

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All of a sudden, Seunho felt he need to wake up. He opened his eyes, but everything was blurry. He closed his eyes again, allowed his eyes to adjust, then slowly opened them again.

 

He found himself surrounded by something white which gave out a very light shade of gray. He turned his gaze around, examining his surroundings. After some time, he realized that he was in a poorly lit white room,

 

Hospital, he thought.

 

All of a sudden, the doors swung open as a woman in white entered the room. A nurse. 

 

The nurse got startled when she saw the man looking at him. Quickly, she approached the patient and exclaimed, “You're awake sir! How are you feeling?”

 

"Mmmh.." Seungho just moaned, his throat was too dry for him to speak.

 

The nurse noticed that Seungho was still adjusting himself and is struggling to speak, so she patted his chest to comfort him and said, "It's ok, it's ok...Don't speak. Just rest for now."

 

Seungho just nodded.

 

“You've been sleeping for 2 days. You were almost half dead when a couple found you sprawled on the street, unconscious and bleeding to death. So they brought you here immediately. Good thing your doctor was on duty that night, or else we wouldn't have identified who you are.”

 

Seungho smiled at the nurse in response. He cleared out his throat a bit, then spoke: "T-thank you v-very much...Can I...borrow your...cellphone? I...I just...need to make....a few calls..." his voice was husky due to his dry throat.

 

The nurse nodded with a smile as she handed a glass of water to Seungho. After giving him his meds, checking his vitals and handing down the phone, the nurse left.

 

Seungho stared at the ceiling as he tried to process his plan of action. After a few minutes, he started dialing numbers....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Hi everyone! I would like to express my deepest apologies for the late update. I was really really busy with school :(

To my subscribers, especially asdfghjkenia, I'm really sorry :( I really wanted to give you a good chapter, so I ended up dragging time. But I realized its not time I need, its inspiratiion. *sigh*  

Anyway, I'll ry to update as frequent as I can this week. :)

And I would also want to welcome my new subscribers! :) Yey! 

I would also like to formally welcome one of the new subbers ms.wtfelicia, who played a big role into pushing myself into writing fics! (>.<)