Since the previous chapter ended rather horrible and abrupt I didn't want to leave you guys hanging for too long^^ So here you go, the next chappie!! :D

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I wanted to say something, plead for my life but my mouth just wouldn’t open. No sound wanted to come out. I started to sob loudly and struggled more but the only result was that Daehyun tightened his grip even more. The next thing I felt was a soaring hot pain in my abdomen before I drifted off into darkness.

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[Youngjae POV]

I shot up into a sitting position, my eyes jerked open and I was panting hard. My shirt was drenched with sweat which trickled down my temple and my back. Another nightmare. Just a bad dream. I waited until my breathing slowed down, then I slowly stood up and tiptoed into the bathroom which was attached to our room. When I walked past Daehyun’s bed I first hesitated but then looked at him. It was just a nightmare, nothing like that would happen so I didn’t need to be scared. 

Daehyun’s flawless face poked out from under the blankets. I felt my eyes sting again but no tears came out. I didn’t even know why I felt like crying again. Was it because of the nightmare? Or because of my love for my roommate? I didn’t know but as it seemed I didn’t even have any tears left, finally. I closed the bathroom door behind me and stood in front of the sink. I filled it with water and dunked my head in. That’s most effective to cool down. 

After some seconds I raised my head out of the water, grabbed a towel and wiped my face. Then I looked into the mirror. It was a miracle that the fans didn’t notice that something was wrong with me. My face was a lot thinner and my eyes had black circles around them. Furthermore my skin wasn’t as soft anymore and didn’t have that color people call ‘healthy’, whatever that means. I really looked like a useless, disgusting guy. Zelo and Daehyun from my nightmare didn't lie.

The only good thing is that my tummy fat disappeared but Daehyun still didn’t like me. Why? Was I still too fat? Was I not good-looking enough? I guess my nightmare really has some truth in it. I threw the used towel on the shelf next to the sink and suddenly heard something clink. The sound echoed in the bathroom and sliced through the silence like a knife through butter. I looked down and saw something silver on the floor. A razor blade. 

I stared at it for some seconds and my mind was thrown into confusion. People say it hurts less if you use it. The pain in one’s heart, it should fade. At least for some time. I crouched down and picked up the razor, then I stared at it again. I could just try it for once so I stretched out my left arm and brought the blade on the skin above my wrist. My hand trembled but I barely noticed. 

I pressed down and… it didn’t hurt. It felt good as I watched some blood trickle down the side of my arm and saw how it made beautiful patterns on the tiled floor. Without me noticing a small smile crept on my face. 

“YOUNGJAE!” Suddenly someone shouted my name. My head shot up and I turned to the door. Daehyun was standing in the doorway, a horrified expression on his face and his gaze trained on my arm. I followed his gaze and for the first time really saw my arm and what I had done. The razor blade fell on the floor with a loud clank as I realized the stupidity I did to myself. I broke into tears and sobbed hysterically. My legs buckled,  I fell on my knees into the small puddle of blood and clutched my arm to my chest. Shame hit me like a truck at full speed. I was so very ashamed.

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I think I gave you guys quite some heart attacks during the previous chapter, right? ^^'' I'm sorry!! But most of you guessed (or rather hoped) right! It was just a nightmare... pretty unspectacular huh? XD  

I'm sorry I let Youngjae suffer some more in this chapter but this is actually a very important chappie^^ it's a turning point...  Please wait for the next chappie patiently :D

And as always PLEASE SUBSCRIBE AND COMMENT!!!! :)

Oh and just to make it clear: I accept criticism and even ask of you to let me know if you're unsatisfied with something^^ Like that I can learn and try to make it better next time. So THANK YOU to Jinchanie, who told me that she(he?) didn't like the previous chapter at all very honestly^^

livexonmars: You guessed right :) Sorry for this unspectacular explanatian^^''

Kaiten3693: Yeees it's just a dream^^ Sorry for scaring you, you even cussed O_O

phiphuong: You have a very sharp mind :D I feel honored to have a reader like you^^ 

akai-ito: Your background music didn't really fit for the chapter^^'' You hoped right too~ 

StarMagician: Well, now you know what actually happened :) I hope you don't hate on them outside of the nightmare ;D

emaBlockbc: Sorry for scaring you!! And thank you very much for the compliment :D

Jinchanie: Since I already told you my thoughts about your comment I hope this chapter made up for the previous one (?) If not I'm sorry for disappointing you >-<

ToneHarmonic: I hope this update is soon enough to calm your heart :) Aaaaand you guessed right too! ;D

LittlemissBANA: Right! It's just a dream^^ I think I really caught everyone by surprise, sorry ^^'' By the way, you're a B1A4 fan? They are awesome too but sadly there aren't that much fanfictions about them right?

BAPgotSWAG: As you see, you hoped right :) By the way, your username is sooo true XD