My Mind's a Mess and My Heart's a Wreck.

Lost Inspirations {hiatus mode}

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Oh there you are again, messing with my mind. Honestly, you're making it hard for me..

 

Tired of eavesdropping on Kai's conversation, you stomped your way out of the room. To think, I almost thought that he was different. Jerk. You abruptly stood up and made your away through the crowd. Unaware of your strength, you slammed the door shut behind you. Just looking at him, makes me feel.. irritated.

Baekhyun turned around and looked at Jieun, "Uh oh.."

"This isn't good, ____, never been this.. mad before." Jieun set her hand on the side of her cheeks as her eye brows furrowed.

"C'mon let's go follow her." Baekhyun said as he grabbed Jieun’s wrist as he dashes to the exit. 

 

You took out your ipod and set it on shuffle. Just as you put your earphones on, MAMA played. You reminisce the time you spent with Kai at the dance studio, and quickly pulled your earphones off of your ears. You lightly squealed from the pain of pulling your earphones abruptly and shoved your ipod back in your pocket.

You walked through the streets, people are aware of your bad mood. They carefully moved out of your way as you walked through the crowd. Your stare, this time, it’s intense. You could feel the anger in your eyes, your face scowling. To think I thought he was a pretty cool guy. Ugh. In an instant, your mind was filled with hatred. Thoughts of Kai, the image of his sweet smile, burned instantly as you reminisce Kai’s words in your head. Using me as revenge.. to Min Ah? Chet.. please. That's pathetic.

 

Your heart lightly thump from hearing Jieun’s voice. "_____~! Wait up!" Jieun shouted, as she jog her way closer to you. 

Before you could take another step, you paused and turned around. Jieun and Baekhyun were startled by your ferocious glare. You couldn't help it, you were just.. so infuriated. Unable to response, you exhaled and smiled softly in reply.

"Are you okay..?" Baekhyun walks closer to you, as you kept you glare away from them. He sets his face in front of yours, just a few inches away from you, trying to gain your attention. Completely ignoring him, you tilted your head and glimpse at Jieun.

"Yeah? Why wouldn't I be?" 

Jieun looks at you, with that stare of hers, you know that she doesn’t believe your response.

"I mean it. I don't even care about it at all."

"Yeah sure.." Jieun said lightly as she looks at the ground. You and Baekhyun couldn't hear her, as the cars passed by making her voice sound vague.

 

 

 

The next day.

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You weren't able to have enough sleep. Knowing about Kai's true intentions, you couldn't function property. The crowd of people, mummers. You muted them all in your head as you head towards your classroom, spacing out. Although you were looking straight ahead, your mind is somewhere else.

"Yo." Kai said as he walks up to and tapped his textbook on your head with that silly grin on his face. You shook your head, making him move his book away from your head. You looked up at his face, and stared deeply in his eyes with that blank look on your face. He smiled innocently to you. That smile, I can no longer trust it. You glared at him in response. 

"You look like you're in a bad mood today." Kai walks in front of you, preventing you walk into the classroom. “Are you sick?” He reaches out his hand, trying to touch your forehead.

Just before he could set his hand on your forehead, you swiftly slapped his hand. "So what?" you scoffed as you set your hands in back in your pockets.

He stared at his hand, that you just slapped as he set his hands in his pockets. "Let's hangout then, maybe that would make you feel better." he smiles as he tilted his head slightly, adjusting himself to your height. Then he gazes to your face as he smiles, waiting for you to reply.

 

 

Do you think that's easy? I mean seriously, after ripping my heart apart, how can you expect me to put a smile on my face?

You looked up at him, slightly biting your bottom lip.  You looked straight at his eyes your voice was in a monotone, "Just looking at you.. makes me feel sick." Just with that, you brushed passed him and walked to your seat. You set your head down on your desk as your face furred from talking to Kai so boldly. Just seeing him, makes you feel irritated but happy at the same time. It was confusing, you weren’t able to define your feelings. But right now, you were able to define that you feel hatred towards Kai. Hatred.. it’s hatred right..? You set your head to the side as you looked out the window. It isn’t hatred that I’m feeling.. It’s.. jealously. To know that he’s using me just to make someone else, Min Ah, feel jealous, makes me feel so sympathic. To think I meant something, to think I thought he was.. special. I guess I was wrong.

 

Kai stood in front of the door, blankly thinking of your sudden outburst. He turns his head to look at you and smirked. Just as he was about the walk into the classroom, Baekhyun walked up to him and grabbed his shoulder, "What do you think you're doing?"

Kai looks down at Baekhyun and smiles darkly, "..What?"

“Just what are you going to do to _____?”  Baekhyun’s tone became serious.

“Chet.” Kai leans his face near Baekhyun's ear, "This has nothing to do with you, so don't interfere." He looks at Baekhyun with a smirk.

"If it has something to do with ______, then it does." Baekhyun stared at Kai's eyes sharply. Baekhyun, he's known to be cutesy and happy, just suddenly became angry and fierce.

Kai widen his eyes, he didn't expect Baekhyun to respond in a confidently matter. Swiftly, a dark smile crept on Kai's face as he smirks, "..So you like _____?" 

Baekhyun suddenly jumped, a slight shade of pink brushes his cheeks, "What?! Aniya!" He looks at you, as you were spacing out at the window. The window's lighting made you glow, in comparison of the rest of the classmates, sitting afar from you and the windows, you stood out.

"Sure.." Kai walks pass by Baekhyun as he stood there, deep in thought with pink bubbly cheeks. Kai glances over at Jieun, which happened to be standing near the hallways. He wasn't sure if she had been eavesdropping, but he couldn't care less. He casually walks pass her to his class. 

Jieun stood there, hugging her text books against her chest. She glances over at Baekhyun, and noticed that he was still looking at your classroom. His face was turning red. Jieun noticed that his cheeks were as red as a cherry tomato as he watches you. 

Jieun unexpectedly remembers that every time she would get the chance to glance at Baekhyun, her face would get red. Red as an cherry tomato, just as red as Baekhyun’s face, as he looks at ______.

She sighs, and walks up to Baekhyun. In her most forced cheerful tone, "Aren't you coming in? You're going to be late, Baekhyun-ah!" She aggressively patted his back as she skips to her desk besides you.

"Ouch.." Baekhyun patts his back, where Jieun had slapped him “Okay..” he walks into the classroom right behind Jieun. He was moving ungainly. He bumps onto the other desks as he made his way to the desk in front of you. You looked at the back of his head as he fluffs his hair. 

You smiled at Jieun as she sat beside you, “Annyeong~”. She looks at you and nodded her head, and then faintly smiles back in reply.

 

 

It was lunch, you were walking to the cafeteria. You scanned the room, looking for Jieun. You spot her sitting by herself spacing out on her plate of food. You walked over to the food stalls and purchase an egg tart and walked towards Jieun's table, "Hey, you alright, Jieun?" You sat down in front of her set your hand on her forehead, "Are you feeling sick?" you set your free hand, to your own forehead, comparing her temperature with yours.

She looks up at you, and shakes her head in reply, “Mianhae, I feel a bit lightheaded..”

Just when you were about to say something, the cafeteria door slammed open. You had a mini heart attack as you tried to look at the idiots that were making a scene.

You noticed Baekhyun and Kai, as they were speed walking towards the food stalls as they were shoving each other. They made their way through the crowd, Kai shoved Baekhyun, making Baekhyun's grip of his tray of food, flung through the cafeteria. Everyone was looking at the tray of food as in landed on Min Ah's chest.

Everyone's attention was set on Min Ah. You looked at her, agape. She looked down as the tray slipped onto the ground. She agape and quickly glared at Baekhyun before everyone looked at her.

 Everyone started to laugh at her as they whispered to each other. The entire cafertira was filled with people laughing, people mumbling to each other, as they gave her glares.

Min Ah suddenly looked up and smile. She forcibly smiles as she looks at Baekhyun, who was nervously scratches his head in guilt. Her eyes lingered to Kai, as he crosses his arms and smirked at her. You weren’t able to define that look on Min Ah’s face. You weren't particularly sure if she was sad, but the look in her eyes made it seem as if she wanted to cry. That forced smile, made it hard see if she wanted to cry or not.

Without thinking, you stomped your way to her, grabbed her wrist. You looked up glared at the people who were laughing at Min Ah, and dragged her out of the cafeteria.

Kai and Baekhyun looked at you, surprised. You tried to ignore them, but you secretly glance at Kai, as your eyes met his. You slightly widen your eyes, and swiftly looked away from him as you made your way out of the cafeteria with Min Ah held tightly on your grip.

 

"..I thought that they don't get along." Baekhyun shrugs as he continues to ruffles his hair.

"Hm.." Kai set his hands in his pockets, "I got to go somewhere, see you later, Baek."

 

Just as you walked out of the cafeteria, you realized of your suddenly boldness and quickly let go of Min Ah's wrist. Your back still facing her, "You should wash up, I'll call someone to bring you extra clothes."

Min Ah crosses her arms and sighed, "Pft, you're just doing this. Helping me, just to make you look good in front of Kai." Her tone darkens, "You don't even like me." Her voice was getting dimmer.

With your back still facing her, "I wouldn't care less about him." you turned your head and gaze at Min Ah's eyes. She was startled by the angry look in your eyes and slightly jumped. You weren’t particularly in a good mood. You had the scowling look on your face since yesterday.

"Just get yourself cleaned up, I'm embarrassed to be seen with you." You walked away in thought, "That’s the first time I've seen Min Ah.. so flawed. Does Min Ah and Kai.. really had a thing?" You ruffled your hair and looked pass the window. Well, this is the point where I should give up, it's like I finally hit my head that hard to realize that, that yesterday was like a blur.. all blur. 

 

"Really now?" Kai said lightly as he leans on the wall. He glances at you, “Just what goes on in your head..?” 

 

 

Sorry late update guise. I was thinking of ideas for my chanyeol's fanfic and I guess I got too into it and almost forgot about this fic ^^ hehe mianhae~  c:

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Hehe, anyways  you   thanks for reading (: Very much appreciate it~ 

-Alice 

 

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BaboAlice
Hiatus mode~ I will continue this, just later XD lol

Comments

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anneeeyyyy
#1
No need to say sorry for making long chappies.
I like long chappies ~ <3
EggyeolVirus
#2
T_T hiatus mode? omfg NOOOOOOOOO
WHYWHYWHY?! i love this story so much... T-T
EggyeolVirus
#3
Ahh, so much drama, my heart cannot take it <333
^___^ i love it anyways~ long updates are the best!
hirostar
#4
YAY!!! you update! this has to be my most favorite story of all.
Minah! SHE IS CRAZYING!!! uhhg! i wonder how the love triange will come out! UPDATE SOON!
sarang_sora #5
that stupid freaking creepy crazy annoying minah girl what the f is wrong with cant u let go of your lover just for your sister how cruel are you?! (rage mood)
i feel sorry for jieun :(

update soon~~
CaptainV-neck #6
MINAHHHHH YOU EVIL LITTLE-- GAHH. She's so... Ugh... >.< This love pentagon is so dysfunctional, haha. Next chapter, you should have Taemin kiss everyone x)
senzakura
#7
eskufsudfgsuygdsiygy crying because you're back, I was so afraid that you might stop updating, I MISSED THIS FIC SO MUCH ♥
hirostar
#8
Why haven;t you been updating this?? I MISS IT! THIS IS LIKE MY ALL TIME FAVORITE STORY OF ALLL!! update soon please...