Sungjong could barely turn his head when he heard someone walk up to his bed.  Despite deciding to continue with chemotherapy, he was extremely weak these days.  He had both Sunggyu and Sungyeol depressed.  They would always smile in front of him and tell him comforting words but he could always see that sadness in their eyes.  He had lost a lot of weight and he was barely eating.  He could only keep food down for thirty minutes now.  The doctor was contemplating on whether they should insert a feeding tube into Sungjong’s throat.  It was really bad.  The doctor’s tried to sugar coat Sungjong’s condition in front of the young boy, but he knew what they were saying to Sunggyu.  It didn’t take a genius to figure out that Sungjong would most likely not make it. 

“Sungjong, Myungsoo is waiting outside again.  Are you sure you don’t want to let him come in?” Sungjong looked away from the TV to his hyung.  He felt extremely guilty for turning Myungsoo away every day.  He didn’t get why the boy was so persistent in seeing him.  Didn’t Myungsoo get that he was really sick?  It was bad to get attached.  Nothing good could come out of this. 

“No hyung.  Tell him he’s wasting his time,” Sungjong said angrily as he turned around in his bed.  Sunggyu gently patted Sungjong’s head.

“Maybe what you need right now is a friend.”

“I have you and Yeollie hyung.  That’s all I need right now.”

“It seems like he really cares about you.  He seems like a good guy,” Sunggyu nodded his head as he sat in the chair beside Sungjong.

“You talked to him?” Sungjong turned to face Sunggyu with an accusing look.

“Well I can’t help it!” Sunggyu exclaimed, “He’s been there almost every day!  How close are you to this kid anyway?” Sunggyu eyed the teddy bear in Sungjong’s hands. 

“I only talked to him like twice,” Sungjong said.

“Jongie! I brought chocolate!” Sungyeol said happily as he came into the room with a cup in his hand.  As the door closed behind him, Sungjong got a glimpse of Myungsoo sitting against the opposite wall, facing his doorway.

Sungjong looked away and then to Sungyeol.  A smile formed on his face because Sungyeol was genuinely the only one who could light up the room for him.  He was always smiling and cracking jokes. He always tried to be happy when he was around Sungjong.  And even though, his eyes would sometimes give away his true feelings, for the most part his over-exaggerations and Sungyeol-ness was enough to make up for it. 

“What are you doing?  He can’t have any of this!” Sunggyu exclaimed.  He pointed at a piece of paper hung right near Sungjong’s bed that listed all the foods Sungjong couldn’t have.  Sure enough chocolate was almost near the top. 

“What’s the use of chemotherapy if you can’t have anything you love?  It’s hardly worth living huh?” Sungyeol winked at Sungjong.  That was another thing Sungjong loved about Sungyeol.  While Sunggyu was cautious about throwing around words such as “death” Sungyeol could say it easily.  It made Sungjong comfortable that Sungyeol didn’t treat him any differently now that he was sick.  

“Oh it’s just this once, hyung!” Sungjong begged but Sunggyu frowned, “In no way hell or form!”

Sungjong raised an eyebrow, “What?”

“No and that’s final!  Sungjong,” Sunggyu grabbed both of Sungjong’s hands in his own, “You really need to stick to this diet and the rules.  Do you know what will happen to you if you don’t?”

“Hyung,” Sungjong gave a weak smile and let tears fall down his cheek.  He put his hands up to Sunggyu’s cheeks, “I know what’s going to happen to me.”

Sunggyu completely broke down.  His head fell on top of Sungjong’s knees and Sungjong patted his back consolingly.  Sungyeol, who was trying to hold in his tears, started silently crying.  Sungjong looked at him. 

“Thank you, hyung.  You don’t know how glad I am that you came back.  You—“

“I never went away, Jongie!” Sungyeol sat down beside Sungjong, “I’m your best friend!  You pushed me away!”

“I didn’t want to be a burden,” Sungjong’s voice was breaking.

“You could never be a burden,” Sungyeol put an arm around Sungjong’s shoulder and the younger one immediately leaned in towards him, “You’ve been my best friend since before I can remember.  I don’t know what I would do without you, Lee Sungjong.” 

Once the crying had stopped and the Sungs had decided to accept the inevitable, Sunggyu personally handed the cup of chocolate to Sungjong. 

Sungjong squealed as he accepted the cup and smelled it.

“But I hardly smell any chocolate!” he whined.

“Yah!” Sungyeol said.  He was smiling even though there was a sheen of tears in his eyes, “It’s chocolate milk!”

“It’s too diluted!” Sungjong said as he swirled the cup with a finger. He brought it up to his mouth.  He saw his brother discreetly cringe. 

“Well if it’s too diluted then maybe I’ll take it—“ Sunggyu was about to grab for the cup, but Sungjong downed it faster than anything he’d drank or ate in the last two or so months. 

“Holy —“Sunggyu exclaimed.

“ake mushrooms!” Sungyeol exclaimed as he covered Sunggyu’s mouth.

“Yummy,” Sungjong smiled as he rubbed his stomach, “Finally something I can enjoy!”  He looked at his hyungs who looked like a strange mix between uncertain and scared.  But Sungjong just stuck out his tongue. 

“Yah Sunggyu!  Lee Sungyeol YAH!  Stop worrying!” 

Sungjong opened his eyes.  He looked around.  It was 2am in the morning and he was lying down on his hospital bed.  He felt a hand grab onto his tentatively and he was about to yell when he heard a familiar voice.

“Sungjong?”

Sungjong stayed silent.  He would stay silent if it would make him give up and leave. 

The hand that was holding his turned his around and then Sungjong felt his hands intertwining with Myungsoo’s. 

Sungjong couldn’t help but move his hand away instinctively but Myungsoo wouldn’t let him.

“You said you would be there for me, Sungjong.”

“I’m sorry Myungsoo, but I can’t.”

Myungsoo was silent and then Sungjong felt the bed get heavier as Myungsoo got on the bed beside him.

“Then I’m just going to have to be there for you.”

“It’s only going to get worse Myungsoo.  I don’t want you here,” Sungjong sighed but he relaxed as Myungsoo turned to him and put a hand around his waist. 

“But I want to be here,” Myungsoo was shaking badly and Sungjong didn’t get why.

He hugged Myungsoo and Myungsoo put his chin just above Sungjong’s head.  Sungjong knew he should’ve kicked Myungsoo out.  But he didn’t have the heart to ask the older boy to leave and a bigger part of him wanted Myungsoo there.  He liked the warmness of Myungsoo’s hug and the way the older boy seemed to care about him so much.  Maybe he and Myungsoo could still save each other.