Myungsoo was almost certain that it was Sungjong who had given him the chocolates the day Dongwoo had visited him. 

            He sighed as he fell back on his bed.  Dongwoo had left three weeks ago.  It had been a month since he’d last seen Sungjong.  Myungsoo’s life had slowly slipped into what it had been before he met the boy.  Occasionally the old man from across the hall would visit him to talk about how his good-for-nothing grandchildren ignored him, but other than that Myungsoo was as lonely as ever.  His hair was much longer; he was in dire need of a haircut and he had stopped walking and exploring the hospital.  It was pointless and a waste of time.  But sometimes he couldn’t resist going to the dining hall just to smell the hot chocolate they would make on cold and snowy days.  While in bed, every day Myungsoo thought about a lot of things. 

            Most of the time, Myungsoo thought of Sungjong.  How could someone affect him so much?  The first few weeks after Sungjong left, Myungsoo had done nothing but wait for the boy.  He wanted Sungjong.  He wanted to feel the boy next to him.  He wanted to hug him.  And then a realization hit him; he was in love with Sungjong.  He was in love with someone he’d never seen in his life.  But slowly as time passed and Sungjong didn’t come, Myungsoo tried to throw away those feelings.  He was sad and disappointed that Sungjong hadn’t visited him.  Sungjong had promised to be there for him.  So where was he?  And after a month, Myungsoo now despised the boy.  Sungjong was a liar who gave fake promises.  He dragged Myungsoo on.  He made Myungsoo care and worry about him, had a bright personality that made Myungsoo get attached and then he threw Myungsoo away!  Myungsoo didn’t want anything to do with the boy.  But even though he was full of hate, he couldn’t help thinking about Sungjong every night. Every night he told himself that it would be the last night he thought of the boy.  But each day he woke up with the feeling of those soft hands on his mind. 

            It was three in the afternoon and Myungsoo was still lying in bed on his side, his back to the door.  He gave a pitying sigh and rolled until his face was in his pillow.  He rarely did anything but sleep these days and when he slept he would always dream of Sungjong.  As clear as day he would hear Sungjong's voice and feel the younger one graze his soft hand across his cheek...and it always felt so real.  Sometimes when he woke up he even imgained smelling Sungjong's scent.  

            But today he promised he would forget the boy; he was debating if he should sleep and probably end up dreaming about him or try to stay awake and just wind up thinking about him anyway.  Myungsoo deemed himself...pathetic.

            “Sungjong!  Don’t forget to take these!”

            Myungsoo shot up like a bullet as he heard footsteps run down the hallway and stop a few feet before his door. 

            “Thanks.  I almost forgot.” 

            Myungsoo gulped as he heard that voice and almost felt like breaking down right there.  He missed that voice.  Myungsoo felt himself crying as he fell back into his bed.  He wasn’t going to shout for the boy.  Sungjong had abandoned him and he wasn’t going to go back there.  He was supposed to hate Sungjong.  And Myungsoo really had.  For the last couple of days, he fumed about how the boy had broken his promise to Myungsoo, had broken him.  He had even thought up scenarios in his head. 

            Sungjong would come into his room and ask for forgiveness and Myungsoo would ignore him and pretend that he was sleeping or deaf.

            Sungjong would come into his room like nothing had happened and Myungsoo would yell at him like there was no tomorrow until Sungjong broke into tears. 

            Sungjong would come in and say that Myungsoo never meant anything to him and that he only pitied him.  That’s why he finally decided to visit him in the hospital.  Well if that was the case, Myungsoo was going to try to spit in Sungjong’s face and push him out the door. 

            Myungsoo was refreshing the scenarios in his head, just in case Sungjong did suddenly remember that he had befriended a guy in this room.  But all of that was thrown out the door when the door did creak open.  Myungsoo stayed still on his bed.  He was still lying on his side. 

           He felt a hand fall on his side and he wanted to turn around and yell.  But he didn’t.   He didn’t do anything.  He had been yearning for Sungjong’s touch for so long.  But it felt awkward and foreign now.  He felt the hand hover above his face.

            “No.  Don’t wake him.”

            Myungsoo heard his voice near the door. 

            “Are you sure?” the whisper was close to him.  The owner of the hand was a nurse.  She started walking away from the bed, probably on her way out.   

            “It’s fine,” Sungjong said.  Myungsoo heard the boy walk closer to his bed but the pounding of his own heartbeat was even louder in his ears.  Why was he still pretending to sleep?  Sungjong had finally come!  He was right there! 

            “He’s always sleeping when I visit,” Sungjong whispered.  

            Myungsoo was screaming wildly in his mind, “WHAT?”

            He felt Sungjong’s fingers twirl in his hair and couldn’t help the shiver that ran through his body.  Before he knew it, Sungjong was tucking him in.  Myungsoo was still frozen on the spot.  He was still wondering if Sungjong had visited him.  Then he felt a hand touch his cheek lightly. 

“I love you, Myungsoo,” Sungjong was right next to his ear and Myungsoo could feel the boy’s breath tickle his ear.  Sungjong gently grazed Myungsoo's bangs out of his eyes and then placed a light kiss on his forehead. 

            Myungsoo wanted to speak out.  He wanted to grab the boy to him.  He wanted to say ‘I love you’ too but he couldn’t.  His mind still couldn’t even process past the initial shock of Sungjong showing up.  And when he finally could say something, Sungjong was gone. 

I'm starting to feel really bad for Myungsoo...i'm writing him like he is a depressed person in this chapter