Sungjong couldn’t control his body as it started shaking violently nor could he control the nausea that quickly followed.  Too weak to reach for the phone, he barely managed to reach the bathroom before all of his breakfast spilled out.  Once his stomach was empty, he felt sleep overtake him and passed out.    

            “Sungjong! Lee Sungjong!” Sungjong opened a wary eye as he heard his name being called.  He ached all over.  He was leaning against the toilet bowl, and he could smell his own puke coming from it.  He disgustedly flushed the toilet and leaned back against the wall.  He wiped his mouth with a wash towel and sighed. 

            “Sungjong!” the bathroom door was being pounded on. 

            “Hyung,” Sungjong said weakly.  He looked at the door and wanted to reach out to open it, but he had no strength. 

            Suddenly the door burst open and Sungjong looked up into his brother’s worried eyes. 

            “Sungjong!” Sunggyu yelled.  He ran to his younger brother and held him in his arms.  He was scared at how skinny Sungjong had gotten.  He could barely hug the boy without hugging himself.  Sunggyu looked at the toilet. 

            “Hyung,” Sungjong said weakly and Sunggyu backed up just enough so he could stare Sungjong in the eyes.  His hands were still supporting the boy. 

            “I don’t feel good,” Sungjong frowned and then he fell against Sunggyu.  Sunggyu patted the back of Sungjong’s head as he hugged the boy and his eyes widened in shock as he felt a familiar bump.  He easily picked Sungjong up and carried him to the living room and got Sungjong’s jacket. 

            “I don’t want to go back, hyung!” Sungjong whined.  He threw the jacket Sunggyu was holding, onto the floor.

            “We have to, Sungjong!” Sunggyu screamed; tears were falling down his cheeks. 

            Sungjong broke down as he saw Sunggyu in tears, “I can’t go back, hyung.”  It was a weak argument; he knew what the result would be.   

            “We have to and that’s that,” Sunggyu forced Sungjong to put on his jacket and quickly picked him up. 

            Sungjong woke up on a hospital bed with a headache.  He felt weak and even the slightest movement brought him pain.  His head was pulsing and he felt a terrible migraine coming in waves.   

            Sunggyu got up from his seat and was beside Sungjong in an instant.  Sunggyu looked horrible.  His cheeks were hollow and his hair was messy. He had dark bags under his eyes and the sparkle they always showed was gone.  It seemed like the frown he was wearing was permanently etched onto his face.

            “Hyung you look horrible,” Sungjong murmured.  Sunggyu laughed and his eyes shone again.  Sungjong smiled.

            Sunggyu sat down on his bed and grabbed Sungjong’s hand in his own, “You’ve been asleep for two days, Jong-ah.”  .

            Sungjong tried to mask the shock of Sunggyu’s statement but all he could do was stare at Sunggyu with wide eyes. 

            “Have you been eating at all?”

            Sungjong looked at his brother and knew that Sunggyu was probably blaming himself for not taking better care of Sungjong. 

            “Of course I have!” 

            “Why didn’t you tell me Jongie?” 

            Sungjong looked away from Sunggyu and towards the window at the end of the room instead, “Is it bad?”

            He felt his brother grasp his hand tighter but he still didn’t turn his gaze. 

            “Jong-ah, it…it returned.”  Sunggyu’s voice was soft and it sounded like Sunggyu was in physical pain. 

            Sungjong closed his eyes and let a tear fall down.  He was afraid of this.  He’d seen it coming for a while now, but had kept it to himself. He didn’t want to worry his hyung.  Sunggyu had dropped out of college to work three jobs to support the both of them.  It wasn’t fair to trouble Sunggyu that much. 

            “Is it…” Sungjong couldn’t force himself to finish.  There was a huge lump in his throat.

           “The tumor returned.  It’s…it’s bigger,” Sunggyu said.  He knelt down so his face was level with Sungjong’s, “They want to operate in about a month.” 

            “I don’t want to do it again, hyung,!” Sungjong thrashed around in his bed as anger got the best of him.  It wasn’t fair.  For six glorious months Sungjong hadn’t worried at all about the tumor.  They had taken out almost all of it in the operation.  He had been cured!  It wasn’t supposed to grow back!  After months of chemotherapy, operations and check-ups he was supposed to be cured!  Life wasn’t being fair! 

            “You have to Jongie.  Please!  This will be the last time.  You have to fight this!”

            Sungjong gulped.  He was scared as hell.  He didn’t want to go through all of this again.  He didn’t like how his brain tumor was growing back.  He didn’t like how he would have to fight tooth and nail to survive.  He couldn’t even imagine going through chemotherapy again.  The pain of keeping his food down, the light headedness, or the weakness that accompanied chemo was unbearable to even imagine.  He couldn’t imagine losing all of his hair again; especially since it had finally started growing back to the perfect length.  He hated how worthless he would become.  He would basically become bedridden.  Sunggyu would have to take care of him.  And unlike last time, Sungyeol wouldn’t be there to take care of him when Sunggyu was at work.

            Sungong didn’t want to go through any of that again, but he couldn’t refuse.  It would kill Sunggyu if Sungjong refused to fight the tumor, to fight for his life.  So Sungjong forced a smile as he turned to Sunggyu. 

            “I’ll do it hyung!  I’m going to fight this thing until it’s gone!” 

            Sunggyu broke out into a smile as he hugged Sungjong to him. 

            “Sungjong!  I’m so glad to hear that!” 

          Just a note that I don't personally know that much about brain tumors/chemotherapy so a lot of my story might be inaccurate