Everything was going well. Then all of a sudden, we ed up. Most of the time, people say “I’ve ed up”, but it’s not the case here; I didn’t things up alone. We’ve always managed to do just that better together.

Things were really easier, I felt myself genuinely relaxing even with Yongsun around, maybe a little too much. I wasn’t careful. Then, of course, we had to celebrate our last evening together in the house and drinks are never not an option when we are celebrating something.

They say the best way to know the true nature of a person is to get them drunk. Now, I handle my drinks well, most of the time. Yes, sometimes I get really sleepy. And when we were some dumb teenagers partying, it might have enhanced my protectiveness toward Yongsun, especially when some idiots were flirting with her. But even that, I’ve always kept under control. I never overstepped, because who was I to do so?

Wheein can seriously drink too, despite being a small, cute bean. She gets even goofier, but she hasn’t much change of character. Well, no more than usual anyway. She somehow manages to keep her quick brain working as if nothing was happening.

I can’t blame Hyejin, alcohol brings out her sentimental side even more, and tonight it went out as anger. I should have been more attentive; I thought our last talk had reassured her but I guess it wasn’t enough.

Yongsun… Yongsun. God, Yongsun. It takes so little to set her up. Her reactions differ; sometimes she gets very loud, most of the time she stresses about how red she becomes. The worst is when she gets flirty. It used to drive me mad, whether it was toward someone else or toward me. It didn’t happen tonight, but I’m not sure I preferred what did happen. She was clearly enjoying herself, I bet she won’t have that much of a voice tomorrow with how much she laughed. Then she got… serious? I’m not even sure what it was…

So, we messed up together. This conversation couldn’t have ended well, right? Right. Right? We were in the middle of a conversation about puppies and I had never see eyes shine so bright. Then she blurred out that deadly question.

A few minutes earlier

 - “Is it too early to ask you out?”

My brain is a bit slow, but… what? Yes, it totally is! I was not thinking she was the most beautiful person I ever met just a few minutes ago. Definitely not. If I did, why is the alarm inside my guts going off? Take your hand off my knee, please! No, I’m not panicking. Oh I’m panicking.

- “It is! I’m sorry, God… Why did I… Forget it. I’m so sorry! I thought… I’m sorry.

- Yong, I don’t know-

- It’s fine, you don’t have to explain. I shouldn’t have asked. You know what, actually… If one day, you feel like it, then tell me, ok? I won’t make you uncomfortable anymore.”

She’ll give me a headache if she continues to pace around like that.

- “But I’m not sure I will ever feel like it.

- I know…”

Well, that made her stop. Oh gosh, what have I done? I should stand up. I feel like all of my blood went straight to my feet, what a way to sober up… What do I do? Do I hug her? I can’t do that now, right?

- “Ddun, don’t cry please. I’m not saying this to hurt you, just maybe we wasted enough time on each other.

- I’ve never seen you as a waste of time…

- , I worded it wrong. I meant you don’t have to wait for me.

- I don’t have any choices. I tried, you know? With others. It’s just not the same. You are the one… for me, you really are.”

It’s like she punched me in the stomach. Can words that we have hope for so long end up hurting that much? What can I even respond to that? Yes, Yongsun, you are my ing soulmate! Thank you ing much to realise that after discarding me like I was nothing. Ok, Byul, big breaths. Don’t say anything stupid. Why do humans massage the corner of their eyes? It’s not doing anything. It’s not helping me right now anyway.

- “There is someone better for you out there, it has to be.

- There is probably someone else, maybe just as good. But certainly not better. I’ll be fine either way, Byulyi, I’m sorry brought the topic up. It’s fine if you don’t have feelings-

- I spend SO MUCH TIME thinking about us. We are so different Yongsun, we worked so well as friends back then and we were still barely compatible sometimes. We would not have worked as a couple then and you know it, so what’s different now? Why. Would. We. WORK? We are not made for each other!”

. I lost it. And my voice sounded ridiculous. And Yongsun is still crying. And the door just opened… what a mess.

- “Unnie? Is everything ok? What happened?”

Of course. The kids are back already. The store is close by, of course, they didn’t take long. Hyejin is already all over Yongsun. I should apologi-

- “BYUL-AH! I swear to God, I don’t care what you have to do but goddam GET YOUR TOGETHER! I’m ing tired of this bull-

- Hyejin. Don’t.

- No unnie, you are making an effort, she can do the sa-

- Enough! It’s between Byulyi and I, Hyejin!

- But I’m between Byulyi and you! Wheein too!”

Being yelled at, frankly, I don’t care. But by Hyejin? Holy sh… that’s scary. Speaking of Wheein, where is she?... Ah, she’s on the couch. She looks… well, she wears a poker face. It’s like she is not really in the room.

- “Listen, it’s not Byulyi’s fault if I’m crying. Ok?”

Yongsun seem to have a hand on the situation. Literally, she’s holding Hyejin’s face in both hands. I’ll get some fresh air, I can’t take another verbal shooting from the lion tonight. I’m exhausted.

The fresh breeze helped me getting rid of the rest of the fog I was in in a matter of minutes. Now that I understand more what happened… maybe going back in the fog would be nice. I let her in, lately. I let my guard down, but the holidays are almost over. What’s next? I can't- A sudden cold feeling on my cheek tell me the gods agree with me. Wheein has just shoved a bottle of soju on my face, without a word. This kid is weird. I take the drink and she leans on the iron railing of the balcony, looking away. It takes a few more seconds before she speaks:

- “So… that was something. You’re ok?”

- Yup. You?

- I’m good.

- Good.

- For real?

- Nope. But it’s fine, we’ll be fine.”

She sips on her bottle, I sip on mine. It looks like she wants to speak but refrains herself. After opening for a few seconds, she finally lets something out:

- “She didn’t mean it, you know.

- Of course she did.

- No, she knows you’re trying to make the best of the situation. Trust me.

- I really am…”

I felt my head fall down as I spoke those words. This is a discussion I never wanted to have.

- “I know.

- I’m sorry.

- Maybe it’s time to tell us what’s happening? Hyejin’s lost; she doesn’t know how to help. You know how she is. Maybe explaining would actually give her an opportunity to understand.

- What about you?

- What?

- Do you want to know?

- If you guys want to tell me, yes.”

Maybe she’s right. I hate talking about such private things but maybe it’s not fair for them. And maybe if there is someone I can and I should talk about my heartbreak, it’s them. But first, I need to see what Yong thinks. I can’t go back in just yet, though.

Yong

How is she? I’m sorry for the mess.

Not your fault. She is still very frustrated but I’m trying to clear your name ^^’

Maybe it’s time to tell her what’s happening?

Can I? Are you comfortable with it?

Not really, but she’s right, these two are between us.

Ok… I hope she’ll stop being mad at you.

Yeah, same

Wheein keeps her eyes looking at nothing in the distance. And to think that a few days ago, I was here hugging Yong… Stop thinking about that. Anyway.

- “So. Hum… yup. Yongsun is telling Hyejin so… I guess I’ll tell you. Or do you want to go in and listen to her?

- Hey, relax. I’m sure whatever it is, it’s not that big of a deal. No dead body, right?

- No!

- Then it’s fine. Tell me.

- Ok, so… Where do I start?

- How would I know?

- Right. So… I guess I’ll tell my side of things. Remember a few months ago, when Yongsun told you we had to talk before she told you why she went MIA?

- Sure, then you two talked and she refused to say what happened. She seemed happy, though?

- Really? Well. Long story short, she told me that she had feelings for me since… since high school.

- Oh. I… didn’t see that coming.

- Me neither. So yeah, she said that was why she cut ties.

- I don’t understand.

- It’s because it wasn’t the real reason, it was more because she wasn’t feeling good in her skin and instead of, I don’t know, talking about it, she isolated herself. I learned that last week.

- That sounds more like her… You loved her too, right?”

So she knew…

- “Hm. But I didn’t trust her to be around anymore, and I told her. That’s when she promised to prove me wrong. Anyway, forward to tonight, the topic was brought up a few minutes after you left for the store. The alcohol didn't help. She said I was the one, I ended up saying that we were not made for each other.

- That’s why unnie was crying?

- Yes. I might have been too harsh.

- What’s done is done. But you are still in love with her, aren’t you?”

Our eyes met and hers are telling me she noticed. She noticed how I went back to treating Yongsun almost like before, when I could read her mind and anticipate her needs. She noticed how those actions were on Yong’s side as well, and that they made me flustered sometimes. I should check up on her after, she absolutely hates any type of confrontation. All of it... I feel sad. I force myself to smile.

- “I’ll always be.

- Then why aren’t you giving the two of you a chance?

- Because we are too different, Wheeinie. We were then, we are now. We don’t even expect the same thing out of a relationship. She’s not the one for me and I’ve accepted it a long time ago.

- Hum. I understand.

- You do?

- Yes. If you really don’t think you’ll be good for each other, then why try and risk hurting yourself?

- Right.

- But you aren’t the same person you were ten or six years ago. She isn’t either. Just make sure fear isn’t getting in the way of your happiness. Even if it’s temporary.”

Once again, the genius has spoken. But she isn’t right this time, is she? Definitely not. She squeezes my arm before turning around.

- “Anyway, I’ll see if I need to smack some sense into Hyejin’s head or if Yongsun still has what it takes to do so.”

One of two chapter left for this story! How do you think it's going to end? How do you want it to end? Let me know in the comments! 
P.S : I've published a Wheesa oneshot, it's pure fluff : https://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/1500161/kissing-away