I was wrong. I thought that after our talk, she would have run away. I thought she would have jumped through the door the second Hyejin and Wheein opened it. I was scared that I blew the girls’ opportunity to have a good time with Yongsun when I had promised them I would not. But I was wrong, and I’m so glad that I was.

I hope they didn’t notice. They didn’t say anything. They made their way in the apartment, Wheein’s arms full of pizza boxes. Hyejin was carrying absolutely nothing, but it wasn’t what they were bantering about. To be honest, I’m not sure what they were on about, I was too stressed about my talk with Yongsun and how she would react, but I know it never bothers Wheein to pamper Hyejin.

When they arrived near the living room, Yongsun and I had been silent for a few seconds, but she had focused back on me after recovering from the surprised the girl’s noise had provoked. I’m not sure how to feel about it; on one hand, I knew I shouldn’t have been so cutting with my words but, on the other hand, I had so much more to say. Will I be able to? Would it be even worth it?

Wheein put the boxes on the coffee table and sat back down next to me, on the floor. Hyejin settled back next to Yongsun, on the couch. Yongsun said something about being finally able to eat pizza and she didn’t run away. She just ate. Wheein and Hyejin began to talk about the new barbecue restaurant that had opened on campus, Hyejin complaining that they weren’t any good places when she lived there and Wheein replying that maybe it would motivate Hyejin to go visit her more often. I was trying to engage in the conversation, but my mind was elsewhere.

Yongsun’s mind seemed to be somewhere else also: she ate in silence, sometime nodding along something that one of the girls said. And as she wasn’t talking much, she was drinking a little bit quicker. Well, less slowly, I should rather say.

We are still eating right now but my mind drifted to something else. I think I just ran out of things to think about Yongsun over the years. Something about what my boss said during the day came back to me suddenly. He is a nice guy, but I wish I never had to see him again. I can’t wait to get out of this job… but it’s a necessary step in my career. Damn I make barely anything, my income is ridiculous. It’s going to be hard to take the next step. What is even my next step? Holy I’m so tired… But at the same time, I’m feeling better about myself since I’m doing something with my life.

- “You're right”

What? What is Yongsun on about? She's looking at me. I'm right?

- “What did you say unnie?”

I’m curious about it too, Wheein. What does she mean I’m right?

- “I’ve missed you girls.”

Oh. She's talking to Hyejin and Wheein. The bottle of soju isn’t cold in my hands anymore, I’ll have to go get another one soon.

- “Unnie… I’ve missed you too.

- Hm.”

As expected, Hyejin wears her heart on her sleeve, but damn, Wheein's walls went right up.

- “I'm sorry I distanced myself for a while.

-... Are you going to be around more?

-... Why did you do it?”

The kids spoke at the same time. Hyejin was hopeful, and Wheein seemed to be balancing her with carefulness. Apparently, she didn’t let Yong back in as quick as I thought.

- “Ah...”

Yongsun is hesitating. I'm impressed she managed to say this much. I don't think I ever heard her saying sorry, not for something meaningful. Did I provoke the apology? Was that why she said that I was right?

- “I need to do something before we talk about that Wheeinie, but just know that it was all about myself. Not you. I shouldn't have acted like that, I messed up. I love you both. And yes Hyejinie, I'll stick around if you accept me back.”

Hyejin is going for a hug with Yongsun, gently, as if she goes in too quick Yongsun would disappear. She is so sweet.

- “I love you too! Of course we want you around, unnie. Right Wheeinie?”

I'm not sure what's being silently said between the two best friends, but the look Hyejin is giving Wheein seems... Hesitant, somehow? Hyejin must have sensed Wheein’s mood change as well. Meanwhile, Yongsun is reciprocating her embrace, her nose touching the top of Hyejin's head. Wheein looks like she is debating with herself on what to do next.

- “What is that thing you need to do?

- I have to talk with Byul.”

Oh. So... Am I the reason she drifted away from us? Do I want to talk? She has lifted her head and her gaze feels like she is piercing through me. Crap. I’m supposed to answer.

- “Hum? Ok… Should we give you some space?”

Great, now they are all looking at me. What do I say? Why did you put me on the spot like that, Wheein? And my soju is almost empty. I don’t think I want to talk. A sip. That thing is still sweet, is it insulting me now? I wanted to talk years ago, I couldn’t. Now that she feels like it, I should grant it? What am I on about? This is not about pride. For me, it never was. So why should it start now? Also, there are the girls. Hyejin is up on one arm but she is still half laying across Yongsun’s lap. I know she would have needed her on multiple occasion when she was building her business up. They argued a lot, but Hyejin still looked up to her. And there is Wheein, who never asks for help but still like knowing she has someone she can go to and just… be herself with. Yongsun provided that. I try to do the same, but I’m not sure it’s working.

- “Byul-ah. It’s fine, it doesn’t have to be now.”

If I’m the reason she left, do I owe it to them? God, I need another drink. I just need to be careful about Hyejin’s rubber… plant or whatever.

- “Whe-where are you going?”

Is it panic I hear in Yongsun voice? If so… good. It’s not mean to think like that, is it?

- “I'm not going anywhere; I just need more soju. The pizza was great Hyejinie, you’ll need to tell me how much I owe you.

- Sure.

- While I’m at it, anybody wants a refill?

- Yeah, can you get me another beer? Did you buy enough?

- Of course Hyejinie.”

Wheein is getting up too.

- “I'll come with you unnie.”

We are making our way to the kitchen silently. I'm not a quitter, I won't run away. Even if the thought of it is really alluring. But I don't want to have that talk today. Oh, Wheein is tucking on my sleeve, she’s trying to get my attention.

- “Do you know what she wants?”

She's whispering so the others don't hear us.

- “I have no idea.

- What are you going to do?

- I'll listen, I guess. Just not today. It's been a long week, I just can't have that now.

- You don't have to.

- Have you seen Hyejin?

- Yeah...

- So you know it’s not really a choice I have. How do you feel about this?”

She just shrugs. It’s always hard to know if she is really detached from an issue or if she pretends not to care. In this case, I’m pretty sure I know.

- “You seemed more inclined earlier.

- I was, it was almost like before. But when she apologised... It reminded me.

- I know you missed her too, you don't have to hold back for anyone but you, you know? Not for me, anyway.”

She slowly nods.

- “Having her back would be great...

- Then let her.

- Are you sure?

- Of course, if it's what you want.

- I think it is. But unnie… you'll still be number one.

- I won't make you choose, Wheeinie.

- I know.”

There are some things you learn to cherish in life, and Wheein's hugs are definitely one of them. If Hyejin have mastered the craft, the rarity of Wheein's makes them as treasurable.

- “You're ok?

- Huhum...

- You're not drunk, are you?

- No.

- Good. Should we fix that?

- You know how to talk to my heart unnie.

- It's because your heart is as beautiful as you.

- Don't ruin the mood with your grease.

- You love it.

- Hm. Let's get that soju, I need it more now.”

Her arms are still around me and she punches my shoulder lightly. She has that adorable smile of hers on. Why did I do in my past life to be around two very cute girls? I must have done a lot of good stuffs, that’s for sure.

- “You know, you can take your own advice.

- What do you mean?

- You can let her in too if you want to.

- Wheein, you have to stop growing up suddenly like this. You just took 40 years in seconds.

- I'm serious...

- I know, Wheein-ah. I'm just not sure that it’s what I need.

- Listening to her doesn't cost anything.”

Doesn't it, though? I don't want to be heartbroken again.

- ”... I wish I could have listened to her back then.

- I know. Me too. Should we go back?

- Yep. Wheein-ah?

- Hum?

- Thank you.”

She just nods and heads for the fridge. She's never sentimental for long, this one.

- “So, two soju and a beer... Here, the soju.

- Thanks. Take two beers.”

She's looking at me over her shoulder, a question in her eyes. She doesn’t seem to continue moving if I don’t answer it.

- “Yong finished hers. Maybe she'll want another one soon.”