The Special Brother

Kim Jongkook specifically said to Kim Gapjin, his manager, that they’re going to use his car instead of the usual SUV today. Today is Monday, and the last filming for Kwangsoo as Running Man members. He knew the plan to have a little dinner in a private restaurant Kwangsoo booked, so there’s no way Jongkook will make his manager wait on him, knowing that dinner will probably lasts well into the night.

Also, despite how dejected, sad, and emotional his girlfriend currently is, she’s still too stubborn to stay the night with Jongkook or even let Jongkook stay over her place last night. Jongkook knew that Jihyo would drink her sadness away tonight, so he’s ready to be by her side and sharing her pain. And drinking, the one thing Jongkook still failed to lessen her love for drinking, but he took pride in how less she went out drinking these days compared to years ago, as she tried to listen to his advice.

“Do we have to pick Jihyo noona up, hyeong?” Gapjin asked when he started driving. “No, she’s already with her manager and went to a beauty salon.” She texted him a couple hours ago. Jongkook tilted the passenger seat back and adjust the leg room, chuckling to himself because it’s too narrow, all courtesy to his small girlfriend. “Oh and Gapjin-a, don’t forget to tell Jihyo’s manager to leave after the filming’s done. In case I can’t find him on the set later.” Jongkook reminded. “Ne hyeong, don’t worry.”

Arriving at the SBS building, Jongkook let out a deep sigh. This is it, he’s officially sending Kwangsoo, his little brother, out to the world after 11 years. Praying that he won’t lose his composure today, Jongkook walked through the lobby and saw the familiar face of Choi Bopil, the main PD of Running Man. Time to work.

“Good work today!” was said repeatedly between the staffs and the members of Running Man, closing the last episode with Kwangsoo as their regular member. They walked to the other room, out of the frame. Jongkook waited around as the other members took their time in hugging the tall giraffe. Watching the scene unfolding in front of his eyes, Jongkook knew that they will feel empty without Kwangsoo for sometime after this. Until the wound has completely healed, they will constantly feel the hole inside their hearts, and it’s going to be hard pretending to not feel like something’s missing.

Unlike when the cameras were rolling, Sechan finally found his smile back after Kwangsoo roughly patted his back. “Do your best, you punk. And don’t let the hyeongs bully you when I’m not here, you have to be stronger than I was.” Kwangsoo playfully advised. “Of course hyeong, don’t worry. Other than Jaesuk hyeong and Jongkook hyeong, I can handle and over-throw everyone else.”

Jongkook decided to join. “Even your noona, Sechan-a?” with the ‘snake’ eyes, Jongkook openly stared at the surprised Sechan. “I mean, if I have to, hyeong… You know, for the game.” He stuttered with his reply.

Kwangsoo let out a loud, disappointed sigh. “Auuuh, and you told me not to worry, Sechan-a?”

Jongkook pushed Kwangsoo’s head back with his forefinger. “How many times do I have to tell you not to teach him to kick, push and hit your noona, you punk?” Jongkook meant it as a joke and the two nam-maknaes knew it. “Even Somin-i is getting too competitive these days.”

“Ey, hyeong. Noona will be bored if no one challenges her, with you and her other oppas treating her kindly.” Kwangsoo chuckled even though his heart felt a little hard. He was the one who never held back with Jihyo before, while the hyeongs always gave her the special treatment (even when she repeatedly asked them not to), Kwangsoo never held anything back and treated Jihyo like she’s part of the guys. Well, she’s stronger than Donghoon and Seokjin sometimes so she’s not someone to be underestimated.

“Anyway, where is Jihyo noona?” Kwangsoo wondered. “Ah right, she hasn’t come here, right?” they were currently at the other room of the LP bar, the unofficial waiting room for this set. The others had came and said their personal farewell to Kwangsoo before leaving. They all agreed to meet back up in about 2 and half hours in a restaurant Kwangsoo booked.

“I think she’s still on the set, let me check on—” Kwangsoo stopped Jongkook from leaving. “I’ll go and check on her, hyeong.” As Jongkook about to start arguing that he should be the one checking on his girlfriend, Kwangsoo added with a sad smile. “I think she’s been holding her tears a lot during the filming.”

Jongkook sighed and nodded. “I know, she doesn’t like showing raw emotions because it’s embarrassing for her.”

Sechan smiled. “Much like you huh, hyeong?”

Jongkook laughed. “Yeah, too much like me.”

Kwangsoo patted Jongkook’s back. “I’ll go check on her then, hyeong. Wait here.”

Jongkook and Sechan sat on the empty seats to wait on Kwangsoo. Jongkook checked and it turned out, Sechan also requested his manager to leave early as he’s going to dinner with the others later.

Meanwhile, Kwangsoo found Jihyo still in the middle of the set, weeping silently while writing something. “Noona, why are you still here?” he asked with a sad smile. Surprised, Jihyo wiped her tears with both of her hands, the pen she was holding abandoned.

“Na? I can’t really write in a rush, so I asked Bopil PD if I can write another one and recorded my voice later.” Jihyo explained, sniffling softly. “Noona, you don’t really have to do that.” Kwangsoo was about to join in when Jihyo shook her head. “No no, I have to. You can’t be here, the letter is for you so you can’t see it now.” She shushed him away with her hands.

“Eyyy, I’m just going to sit with you, I promise not to peek—”

“No, you punk. Go away.” She said with a small laugh this time.

“Ah okay okay.” Respecting Jihyo’s wish to be left alone, Kwangsoo backed away from the table. “The others left already, but Jongkook hyeong and Sechan-i are still on the other room.”

With a wave, Jihyo nodded. “I’ll go there once I’m done here.”

“Okay noona, if I happen to leave first, I’ll see you at the restaurant.”

“Eung, ga.”

An hour later, freshly changed into another clothes, Jongkook saw Jihyo finally walked out of the set. “You okay?”

Without another word, she threw herself to Jongkook’s waiting arms. “It was so hard to control my emotions, oppa.”

“I know, did you also record your voice for the letter?” He felt her nodding. “Jalhaesso, he’s going to treasure it for a long time. You didn’t really need to push yourself that hard, Jihyo-ya. He knew we love him.”

Wiping her face, Jihyo pulled away from the hug. “But I still want to do it for Kwangsoo.” Jongkook patted her head lovingly. “Shall we go now?”

“Can I change first? My manager left me some change of clothes.”

“Of course, I’ll wait here.” Months ago, when Kwangsoo first told the members about this, Jihyo didn’t react much. In Jongkook’s eyes, she probably didn’t think much of it because all of them considered leaving the show at least once through-out the years. Only Lizzy, Joongki and Gary who left the show as the others chose to stay. She thought, Kwangsoo was just having a hard time because of his injury but the decision wouldn’t come through.

But a month ago, Kwangsoo made the ultimate decision after going through gruesome rehab for his injured foot. He didn’t choose to leave because of the pain, but he chose to leave because he was restraining the members and the whole production team from making the show stayed true to its’ name. Kwangsoo broke down that night when he told the members, apologizing repeatedly, thinking that he let the others down by walking away.

“If I have to choose between having you here every week but in pain or seeing you healthy but you left Running Man, I’d choose the latter in a heartbeat, Kwangsoo-ya.” Jaesuk said sincerely. It’s sad and depressing to think about filming Running Man without Kwangsoo, but his health should be the priority. “I’d say the same thing for the other members too, we can always meet up anywhere and anytime. It doesn’t have to be on Mondays during Running Man.” He continued.

The maknaes, Sechan and Somin were lost for words. Somin, weeping silently, was being comforted by Donghoon’s pats on her back. Sechan, he was really quiet, the most quiet ever since the others met him.

Seokjin backed Jaesuk’s words soon after that. “You’re still young and you can do so much more, Kwangsoo-ya. Don’t let us or the show prevent you for everything else.” Kwangsoo cried a little harder, hearing that from the oldest of them all. “Geure, you punk.” Jongkook joined Kwangsoo on the floor and wrapped his arm around Kwangsoo’s hunched shoulders. “D