Ever since she started her first day in the hospital, Chaewon gets this in every part of her body, an electricity-like jolt that runs fast and comes together at the edges of her fingertips when she holds the cold metal scalpel in her hands. That is an indescribable experience she gets, the passion and the adrenaline from an operation. Therefore it is interesting when she finds herself comparing surgery to the thought of going to Minjoo’s place - the little skip of the heart; the idea that in less than an hour she has the woman before her - when her presence alone can take Chaewon’s breath away; and with no space between them, the woman in her arms - the tingles in her fingertips when Chaewon gently brushes her hand across her skin. They met barely two months ago yet Minjoo has managed to make Chaewon find the feeling of surgery outside of the hospital.

It has been awhile since Chaewon felt excited to leave the hospital.

When she does arrive at Minjoo’s place, the sequence of events is everything she fantasized just earlier. The woman greets her in an oversized tee tucked into her denim shorts - an obvious attempt to appear more presentable in a casual setting, Chaewon likes seeing the woman try. Minjoo pulls her into her home and proudly shows her the delivered food neatly set up on the dining table, ready for them. But Chaewon isn’t craving for that first as she adjusts her arm so it can reach for Minjoo by her waist and pulls the actress in. She kisses her.

When Chaewon pulls away, Minjoo has a dreamy look on her face that makes Chaewon realises her own - the pride mixed with a tint of relief that comes after a successful operation - Chaewon hasn’t failed Minjoo with a bad kiss. “Let’s eat before the food gets cold.” Minjoo shyly prompts Chaewon to sit and while she lets Minjoo fuss over opening the food up (Minjoo slapped her hands away just), Chaewon properly takes a look around. The homey feeling from the actress’ place comes from the tasteful use of primary colors despite white being the main centerpiece. Not as minimalistic as her own, Minjoo’s space is neat and from where she can see, the entire place does not seem cluttered but open and welcoming. Very much like the owner.

“Like what you see?” Minjoo is definitely conscious of Chaewon looking around her place while she is busy with the final set up. Yet when she meets the brown eyes with a glint on it, Minjoo knows she basically set herself up for that.

“Definitely.”

Minjoo uses the cutleries to pull the chicken drumstick out of its broth and puts it on Chaewon’s plate. “Eat.” They agreed on having ginseng chicken soup and Chaewon realises that it is precisely because of how adorable Minjoo’s reaction is that she will always want to . Nevertheless, the smell from the broth steals her focus and she dives straight into what is prepared. They speak less owing to the fact that Chaewon is munching through her food as if she wasn’t given a croissant and iced coffee just a couple of hours earlier, but she does not think Minjoo needed verbal confirmation that that is probably all she had the entire day. The actress simply lets the surgeon devour as she watches in delight at Chaewon eating well while putting food in her own mouth at a much more normal pace. After a while, Minjoo notices Chaewon has finally stopped and the strongest signal comes from her putting her spoon down.

Minjoo laughs.

“What?”

The actress keeps her laughter coming as she stretches for the tissue box and pulls one out to Chaewon. The doctor puts the pieces together quickly but is again confused when Minjoo avoids letting her take the tissue. Instead, Minjoo cleans Chaewon up herself, dabbing specifically at her chin where a chopped onion sits. “You need to take care of yourself better.” Minjoo says as she crumples the tissue up and places on her side of the table.

Chaewon senses that the statement is heavier than what it is with Minjoo possibly not just referring to her messy eating but also her intense consumption. In this moment, Chaewon gets a new feeling; someone, other than her sister, is caring for her…

And this is good right?

Regardless of what her answer to her own thought is, Chaewon puts on a firm smile, one that she hopes is enough to assure her date. “I will.” Chaewon decides to shift the conversation to her unanswered questions from Minjoo’s afternoon hospital visit.

“So Chaeyeon doesn’t know about us?”

“She doesn’t and it is definitely not because I am embarrassed to be dating you or anything, Chaewon unnie.” Minjoo clarifies first and Chaewon is amazed at how empathetic the woman is that that is her first concern. She smiles to assure Minjoo she understands. Minjoo continues. “There are many reasons, starting with the fact that if Chaeyeon unnie knows, she may get into trouble again for letting me date without the knowledge of the management. Especially you know you and me… are not conventional management approval type.” Minjoo lowers her voice a little, her eyes wavering before they draw themselves back to her companion’s.

“More importantly, I didn’t know how you feel about telling other people about us since we are... only dating.”

While Chaewon appreciates Minjoo’s trait where she cares about others and how they may feel, Chaewon also can’t shake off the idea of another subtext in that last statement - the reminder again of the lack in confidence. She copies Minjoo’s posture and reaches out to hold the woman’s hand that is resting on the table. Chaewon tenderly rubs her thumb on the back of Minjoo’s hand, “I don’t mind it one bit.” She looks back up to Minjoo.

“Dating or in a relationship or whatever label there is for us, it is already fantastic being with you. I can shout to the world about having to know you.” Chaewon does not want Minjoo to constantly think less of herself and her words and smile aim to change that. Minjoo relaxes a little as she listens more.

“But I understand everything that comes with you and I respect the decision you made because you did exactly the same the moment you wanted to go on a first date with me.” They both smile brightly at that, recognising how much has changed in so little time. Chaewon vocalises it further.

“Only three dates in but I don’t think we can lie anymore about how it is for us. I think this is a good time to talk about more than dating…” She does not realise how she manages to lead into this but that is probably a result of her wishes at the back of her mind. Still, she reminds herself to stay rational.

For Minjoo, she already anticipated how this conversation has to come the moment she experienced how special their first date was. It has only gotten more certain since. Minjoo lets Chaewon speak as she can tell from the doctor’s still hold that she is nervous.

“In a very short time, I have learnt that you matter to me. That is why before we go any further, I have to remind one more time that there is only one end result to a relationship with me. I care about you more to not want to see you waste time… on me.”

The moment Minjoo realises how much more intimate they have grown not just physically but emotionally in a span of days is now, when she hears what Chaewon says but at the same time, able to read a deeper meaning into it. The woman is trying to protect them.

“I have made the decision about myself and I wouldn’t change it. This also means I am fearing more and more of what will happen to you as we get more serious. Therefore Minjoo, before it gets any harder, I want you to know that I understand and it’s okay if we stop this at number 3.”

As hurt as Minjoo is hearing Chaewon bring the idea of their ‘break up’ (can one even call that when they are simply dating), she understands this is a suggestion that stems itself in maturity, wisdom and recognition. One may assume it is easy to make calls like this but often in the thick of things, people do not see through the clouds of feelings and passion; yet while Minjoo does not question Chaewon’s genuine attraction for her, Chaewon’s ability to cut through the clutter is a remarkable trait Minjoo admires… and l-likes. Yes, likes…

Actually, Minjoo is certain of what she wants but she needs Chaewon’s actual thoughts and not her magnanimity and selflessness her doctor self embodies.

“What do you really think… about us?” Minjoo asks and she toys with their fingers to be the one holding onto Chaewon’s and rubbing invisible circles. This draws Chaewon’s eyes down and it stays there for a while.

“Well I finally understand what my sister wants me to experience.” Chaewon speaks after a long silence. She pulls her eyes back up to Minjoo’s brown orbs. “And it’s crazy how fast and easy I got there with you.”

Chaewon takes a deep breath when she feels this overwhelming constriction in her chest as thoughts come to mind and it is her instant body reaction to all the true affection wanting to be released. Minjoo sees it.

The way Chaewon is looking at her right now is unquestionable to the point it makes her question… has her past lovers ever looked at her with this level of seemingly infinite depth of affection? The answer may just be-

No.

Minjoo does not know what her eyes may seem to Chaewon right now but she hopes hers can come close to how Chaewon’s appear to her because the woman needs to see how Minjoo already knows she feels.

The same.

“I want a relationship with you.” Chaewon confesses plainly. They are not teenagers in a game of push and pull anymore. At this stage in their lives, they simply are two people understanding how lucky they are to be able to find something special in a time where they have given up hope. Chaewon is not going to play games. She does not see a need to be. Minjoo asks and she tells.

“Even when I know it is not going to be long, I know it will be beyond amazing.”

By now, they both have tears building up in their eyes and Minjoo sniffles cutely to hold back. When a tear slips from the actress’ eyes, they laugh because that prompted Chaewon’s to follow.

Honesty and simply being clear in what one actually wants is so underrated, Minjoo has never felt this refreshed. She already knew... but this - these words from Chaewon gives her comfort that even if she will hurt, she is not going to be alone. Most importantly…

It will be worth it.

Minjoo’s heart slows itself to a resting, an indication of its owner’s calmness in coming to certainty. “Then let’s do it.”

Not letting their hands break apart, Minjoo holds on as she stands to walk over to