Hello dear diary, 

This will be the last time I will write on your pages, because from now on you will belong to that person who is the most important person in my life. Thank you for allowing me to vent and tell you the best time of my life. My dear diary, this is a goodbye.

Juri insisted on me many times so I decided to go to meet Murayama-san. I said many things that I regret that day. Jealousy and anger sometimes take over your words, so I decided to see Murayama-san one more time. After insisting more than a million times she accepted, we went to a private place, where I could apologize for my words, and finally tell her what I really felt.

-Murayama san, I really want to apologize for everything, I was seized by jealousy so I have decided to give Naachan some time since our last meeting. She has been sad and confused at what we have, so we will leave it in her hands, while so much I do not want remorse and problems with you. You are an incredible person, also I was equally selfish in thinking of eliminating you from Naachan's life. You are her best friend and a fundamental part in her life after all, I was a fool and ... Yuiri,  I am really sorry and no matter who she decides to be with, I will support her and I will always be there for her - I said extending my hand towards her, she without thinking took it.

-Don't worry, Mako,  we can't be great friends but even so I can't erase you from her world too, so we're both fine, we said things, yes, we threatened, yes, but we were both fools to get involved in our lawsuit and we put aside for a moment the most important thing for us, Naachan-

-Christmas is approaching and it will be the day she decides but even so I will continue fighting for her until that day I will not lose to you Yuiri -

-I feel the same way, Mako-chan -

And that was the last chapter that I will be able to write in this diary. The rest will be decided by fate. Now it's a goodbye dear friend and again thanks for everything.

Dedication

Naachan I give you this diary along with a letter which contains everything I need to tell you even for once in this life. I hope that when reading this paper you understand many of the things that I lived by your side. I will always love you, because you are mine and I am yours until the end of my days ¿right?.

 = Mako's letter to Nachan =

Hi Naachan,

I know you've been confused these days and that's why we drifted apart a bit. I hope that this letter will clarify a little those feelings that for now seem more tangled than a skein of yarn.

To be honest when I met you that time in the library, I never thought of falling in love with you or anybody, since I suffered enough in my past relationship, they broke my heart more than once, after that I spent the last eight months before meeting you, thinking of everything that happens in love, it breaks, burns and ends, but when you came into my life, that love that I thought was dead, I saw it reborn once more.

Every change in my life the second that I saw myself reflected in your gaze, I touched your hand and I saw that beautiful smile which brightened my days no matter how bad it was. I knew that for the first time in life I had fallen in love with a woman and found true love. From that day on I changed to my happiness and gave it the name of Okada Nana.

Then came our first kiss which transported me to another galaxy where it was just you and me, at that moment I didn't want anything I felt complete, happy, full.

And now I know that even though I will give up touching you forever, I know that somehow you would still feel me. You are the closest thing to heaven I've ever had, and I don't want to let you go. Because all I can savor are all the moments I spent with you, and all I breathed was your life and it may all be over soon, I just know I never want to miss you.

I never showed myself what it really was like to anyone, because I don't think they understand me like you did. I really want you to know who I am. I want you to know that thanks to you I am what I am today, before I was simply a university student who was shy and had no friends. If that's not a miracle then what is? You created this new Kojima Mako. You consummated me with the sweet touch of your hands.

Naachan, in this world I have no other concern than losing you because I know that I will always be yours, since between both of us we consume this love that will be eternal. I will always love you and it does not matter that I will always be by your side in the sun than warming your body every morning, in the air you breathe, remembering my perfume and in the petals of the sakura flowers that you touch you will remember the feeling of my skin on yours.

Once again I will remind you of this. I will always love you. I will be waiting for you on Christmas day under the giant tree in Shibuya no matter how long I spend there. I will be waiting for you, my beloved Okada Nana. I hope this letter is not a goodbye.

ATTE.

Kojima Mako

TO BE CONTINUED >>

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I'm back~