It was hard to gauge how she felt about this, especially now that she was in love with Jun and she couldn’t even think about what her true heart would be for someone else.

She didn’t say anything for a long time. She was afraid of saying the wrong thing, afraid of hurting him. Then she realized that saying nothing could also hurt him, and that just set off her anxiety as she began to squeeze her fingers through her gloves and run through a thousand different possibilities in her head.

He noticed. “I’m sorry for putting you in this position,” he said. “I’ll just… be on my way.”

He stood up and rushed out the front door. He didn’t even put on his shoes properly. He just left and slammed the door behind him.

-

Jun sent her a message that night.

Hi, he wrote. I’m thinking about you.

Arin smiled when she saw the message. The effects of the potion were still in full effect, and any acknowledgement from him was sure to make her heart race, even if she knew it would all fade away in the morning.

Hi, she wrote back. I’m thinking about you too.

It’s funny, isn’t it? How the potion can make you so in love with one person, but then, the day after, that love just disappears into thin air?

Yeah, it is. I got used to it though.

Do you ever feel like you want the love to last?

Sometimes. Other times, I just want it to stop.

Like when?

Right now, for example.

Why?

I want to sort out how I really feel about someone else, but the potion is putting up this huge wall and it’s not letting me see past you.

Is it Woozi?

Yeah.

Why are you only thinking about this now? You’ve known he was your soulmate long ago.

Arin paused. She didn’t think it was to tell him that Woozi confessed, and she felt like she owed him a response.

Did something happen? Jun added when she went idle for a while.

Kind of.

Well damn, I don’t know what happened, but I’m still jealous!

Don’t be. I still only love you!

Well, Woozi is still your soulmate.

But I don’t love him.

Not yet, but if you wake up in the morning, you might realize that you actually do.

You think?

Yeah. I’ve seen it in people I’ve matched so far. Falling in love takes a long time, but realizing you’re in love, that only takes a second. All it takes is one little thing. A kiss, a hug, a touch, a confession, a gift, even just a smile. A smile is enough.

Now I really want this potion to fade.

Wait. If you do realize that you love him, then the potion won’t work on you anymore.

Right...

And that’s a problem. A huge problem.

As Arin thought about it, she realized he was right. It was a problem. The potion wouldn’t work on someone who was already in love with another person, and MRS needed to use that potion to extract the maximum amount of magic. The problem was that love for Woozi did not trigger any magic at all, for better or for worse. That means falling in love with Woozi would render magical extraction from Arin’s love worthless. Essentially, it would significantly slow down the collection of magic, therefore postpone the reversal of Larali’s curse.

You should tell Hoshi about this.

-

Arin and Jun had to meet Hoshi at MRS that night, before the potion faded, in order for Arin to renew the dose before the potion faded.

“Sorry about this,” Jun told her as she put the toothpick in again, looking at Jun. Her body shook, and just like that, Arin would be in love with Jun again.

“Arin,” Hoshi told her. “From now on, You’ll have to always stay under the potion’s effect. We really can’t risk you falling in love with your soulmate. Not yet, at least. Not until we can save Larali.”

Arin understood that. She would do everything she could if it meant talking Larali out of that suicidal despair that her difficult curse had inflicted on her.

At the same time, she felt awfully uncomfortable about how she had given MRS the reins to her love. She couldn’t even choose who to love anymore

She wanted to fall out of the potion’s clutches so she can understand her heart for Woozi, so she can give him a fair response to his confession. Right now, all she could do was postpone it.

-

She wrote Woozi a lengthy message explaining what was going on, how she couldn’t properly respond to him, because she was under the potion’s effect and will be for the foreseeable future. It was a complicated, honest message with all of the technical details that explained the situation, but Arin was sure that Woozi just interpreted it as a rejection.

I get it, he wrote back. Forget I ever said anything.

-

It was nearly 6am when Arin had to go to MRS for the morning dose of the potion.

Arin had to take the potion twice a day, exactly 12 hours apart, and Jun always had to be there when she did. This meant that both Jun and Arin had to be at MRS by 6am, and leave at 6pm, every single day.

“Well, you’re here early!” the reception woman said when she saw her that morning. Her husband was sitting beside her, massaging her back.

“Hey honey,” he whispered in her ear. “What about we…”

The woman put her hand over his mouth. “Be quiet, babe. Not in front of the lady.”

He grunts. “Don’t put your hand over my mouth! I hate when you do that!”

“Ignore him, he’s grouchy today,” the woman told Arin.

“Hey!” They began to fight, and Arin escaped through the other door before she could hear any more of it. That couple always made her feel sick to the stomach, and it was hard to believe they were actually soulmates.

She found Jun waiting for her on the stairs. He noticed the alarmed look on her face as she escaped the reception couple’s spat.

“Maybe seeing them will make you feel better about this Woozi thing,” Jun said. “Just because you’re soulmates doesn’t mean you’re good for one another. Perhaps postponing the inevitable would be a good thing for you after all.”

-

Arin and Jun had to spend the entire day at MRS because they had to take the potion together. They barely had time for themselves at home. It was tiring for both of them, but they both found solace in being together. Arin was always in love with Jun, and Jun was usually in love with her too since they often make out during the extraction sessions.

“I wish we could just move in together,” Jun said one day, right before their extraction session that morning. “It would make life so much easier. It that we can’t see one another outside of this building.”

“Funny you should say that,” Hoshi said as he entered the room. He handed Arin the toothpick with the love potion for her morning dose. “I think you newlyweds might actually be able to move in together soon.”

“How?” Jun asked.

“Arin… remember that request you made? About your voice.”

Arin nodded.

“I finally got a Doctor on board,” Hoshi told her. “She said she can operate to damage your larynx. It won’t affect breathing or tasting, just impede speech forever. It’s an illegal operation, so it will have to be done discreetly. I set a date for you in two weeks. Are you still ready for it?”

Arin thought she was ready for it, but hearing it out loud like that sent shivers down her spine. She gulped and shrugged. Even though she was very ready to get rid of her curse, she was really not as ready to get rid of her voice. The two are inextricably linked, but still separate.

“You have a week to mull it over again,” Hoshi told her. “It’s your decision, and you can back out at any time.”

Arin lowered her head as a wave of anxiety and low spirits washed over her. Hoshi claimed she had a choice, but she knew that she didn’t. It was either that, or live in constant fear of killing others. That was hardly a choice.

“Come on,” Hoshi said. “Take the potion, and we can start with the extraction.”

Arin nodded. She put the toothpick in and looked at Jun.

It was only then that she saw the tenderness in his eyes for her. He felt sorry for the choice she had to make, and the valuable thing she would have to lose.

When the potion took effect on her, Jun wrapped his arms around her comfortingly.

She began to cry. She never cried thinking about losing her voice before, but now the prospect was too real, too difficult. She was glad she had Jun to help her get it together.

-

It was 6pm on a weekend. They had done an extraction session at 6am, so Jun was also under the potion’s influence.

Hoshi had gone home, but had left the day’s dose of potion for Arin to take with Jun. There was barely anyone in all of headquarters, and no one at all in the Extraction Room.

After she took the potion, Jun kissed her again.

It was a spontaneous kiss; no one was watching or collecting magic from it, yet somehow, it felt the most magical.

The kiss became more heated, more passionate. He pushed her onto the bed, laid her down, and climbed on top of her, kissing her more and more ardently, more hungrily.

He then suddenly stopped, shook his head, and laid down beside her, his breath loud.

“That dumb potion really works, doesn’t it?”

She turned her head toward him. He was looking up at the ceiling, his chest expanding and contracting with heavy breath.

“I want you,” Jun told her. “But I don’t think it’s right to have you. Not like this. Not when we’re both under the influence of a potion.”

Arin nodded in agreement.

“When I wake in the morning and fall out of love with you, I feel like the person who kissed you was not really me. It’s a puppet version of me, like someone else possessed me and made me do it. I wouldn’t want that possessed body to take advantage of another possessed body. It feels wrong.”

Arin loved that thoughtful side of him. She loved how he calculated and considered everything because he didn’t want to hurt her. She truly loved everything about him.

She wanted to kiss him again, and so she did. This time, she was the one who hovered over him, straddling his hips as she indulged in another round of his lips.

They were interrupted with the sound of the door opening and footsteps approaching. Flustered, Arin climbed off him. He quickly sat up and leaned over his thighs as naturally as he could manage.

“I see you found a new boy toy, Missy!” came the sound of Jeonghan’s bitter, obnoxious voice.