Everything. Let it fall. It all fell as you sat in the center of it, letting it fall on your shoulders. As it fell, you cried. Your sobs were the only sound except for the crumbling of the walls. No one was there. No one came to help you. You looked up, the sight of it all catching your breath. It broke, every last bit of it, just like you.

You cried, head buried into your pillow. The same empty feeling filled your heart. The feeling of loneliness, the thought that you would never have someone and that no one would ever understand you. That if you called out, no one would came. You hiccuped.

Your phone rang. It was Han. You answered.

“Hey, me a Felix are about to change our hair color. Felix is getting his red-orange and I’m getting mine his color hair now. Want to come?” You didn’t answer. You couldn’t. You were holding your breath to stop you from crying. If you said a word, you oils brake. 

“Y/n?” Nothing.

“Hey, are you okay?”

“Y-yes,” you managed before you started crying again. 

“Y/N!? Don’t lie! No your not! I’m coming over right now!” Han said, shocked.

“Please, no! It’s fine! Han!” You said, not wanting for your parents to find out. 

“I’m coming over,” He insisted. You shock your head even though he couldn’t see you.

“No, Han! I’ll come to you,” you begged. He seemed to think about it.

“Why?” 

“Just-just because. Please, Han,” you said, voice shaking.

“Okay...I’m waiting outside.” He hung up.

You put a hoodie and headed downstairs. 

“I’m going to hang out with my friends,” you called as you walked out the door.

“Okay!” Your mom called. Your breath caught in your throat. They didn’t even realize you weren’t okay.

Han was waiting outside, just like he said he would be. You hung your head low, hands in pockets. You walked up to him. 

“Y/N, what’s going on?” Han asked, hands on your shoulders. You didn’t say anything. You just stood there. Then you broke again. Han pulled you into a hug. 

“It’s okay. It’s okay...” he mumbled. 

“But it’s not! Nothings ever okay!” You said, crying harder. You fell to you knees and continued. Han sat next to you and waited. You didn’t stop though. So he held you. He held you and you cried.

“I’m here for you. I’ll always be here,” he whispered in your ear. You only sobbed harder.

“Don’t say that! Don’t you dare say that! Han, I can’t-I’m not-“ he deserved so much more. He needed things. Things that you couldn’t give him. He deserved so much more. So much more...

When you finally stopped, Han wiped your face, looking you dead in the eye.

“Y/N, I don’t know what your going through right now. I might never know. But I will always be here for you. No matter what you say.” You didn’t ague. You just nodded. Because you didn’t want to argue. You wanted it to be true.

“Good. Now, are you coming or not?”

“Where,” you said, confused. Han laughed.

“Forget already?” You thought about it. Then it hit you.

“Oh,” you said, laughing a little at your forgetfulness. “Sure, I’ll come.”

“Okay! Felix is already there waiting.”

                                             *Time skip to hair place thingy*

When you go there, Felix was sitting in a waiting chair. When he saw y’all, his eyes lit up.

“Finally! What took y’all so long?” He said, smiling ear to ear. Han whispered something in his ear. Felix mouthed an ‘oh.’ Your jaw clenched.

Felix walked over to you and gave you a hug. He lightly kissed the top of your head before pulling away. You were stunned. When ever something bad happened to you and people found out, their immediate reaction was to pity you. They always said things like, ‘oh, you poor thing,’ or, ‘oh, I’m so sorry.’ You hated it. This was not what you expected at all. You kinda liked it better that way, though.

“So, do you know what color hair we’re getting?” Felix asked. You nodded. He smiled.

“What do you think?” 

“I think you should get it. It sounds cute,” you said, giving him a small smile. He smiled back.

“Good. Han, we got the sign of approval,” he said, turning towards Han. Han gave him a high five.

“And you know what’s better? We get it from Y/N,” Han said, smiling at you. You blushed. 

“Yap! Now, all we have to do is go get.”

“Wish us luck.” Han said as he started to walk to his chair.

“Good luck!” You called. Han gave you a thumbs up.

You watched as the two boys got their hair done, smiling sadly to yourself. Because you still didn’t know how to be their’s.