Hey guys! sorry i haven't updated in so long. so much has happened in my personal life and i was honestly so... out of it. but i'm happy to report that despite all the that's happening with me, I don't want to abandon this story.  and with that, i come back with this new chapter. 

I just want to say that I plan on seeing this through the very end. and if we all don't make it there together, i understand. i'm happy enough that i get to bring this out in to the world. it's may not be the best one out there, but it is special to me. and a creator, that's good enough for me.

I appreciate all the new subbies and you guys reading this, i honestly do. i hope i can bring you happiness as much as you guys have given me.

much love,

-  author-nim <3

“Eun? Eun?? Earth to Eun? Are you listening??” fingers snapped in front of me, breaking me out of my thoughts. I looked at Jisoo oppa who looked back, worried and curious why I was probably out of it.

“You ok? I asked if we should play something by Nell or Urban Zakapa and you spaced out on me. Is something wrong?” I could only sigh… I don’t know what’s wrong with me. It all seems so messed up I don’t even know where to begin.

“I was just thinking about a friend. He’s going to enlist soon and by the time he gets out, I don’t know if I would see him again.”

“You mean you’re worried about Wonwoo and you’re have-to-have lunch date?” he nonchalantly asked.

I stared at him for a while, wondering how he figured it out but then I again, he’s dating one of my best friends so…

“Y-yeah…” since he already knew, might as well ask for help.

“What is there to worry about? You have no feelings for him right? I mean even though it was you who kissed him and it is you who is still holding on to Daniel, not letting him go even after it’s been 8 months since you broke up. Again, what is there to worry about?”

And he just sat there, smiling sarcastically like he didn’t just drop this huge gigantic ball of sarcastic comments about my life decisions.

“I don’t know why I’m friends with you…” I said. The truth hurts, I know. But he is still my friend, is he not?

“I’m sorry if it came out harsh, i didn’t mean it like that. But this is in fact, what is happening. And you have to learn to face them and deal with it. You can’t run away from everything you know…” well, he makes a strong argument.

“What do you suggest I do? Let go of Daniel and accept what can happen with my relationship with Wonwoo?” I asked. And ya’ll know what he did? He smiled. Hong Jisoo simply smiled.

“I didn’t say anything. You came up with that on your own.”

“And so, that’s what went down. What do you think though?” I asked through the video call I’m having with Dahyun at the moment. It’s been a while since we talked and I just had to talk to someone else to convince that what I came up with might really be my next right move.

“I think…. He’s right. Honestly Eun, why are you holding on to Daniel? If you really wanted to be together, you would’ve been by this time. Sure it seemed like that for the first five months, but now it feels like you two are just in different places… you have to start thinking about what’s best for your life and his public career. You know better than anyone how risky it is to date someone famous.

And, you told us about getting him back. It’s been 3 months since, is it even still what you want?”

How do I answer to that? What could I possibly counter argue with that? Every time I wanted to bring it up, I push it back down because I don’t think I could go through another rejection. He broke up with me, what’s there left to say? If he doesn’t want to get back together, I don’t know if I can face him. We’ve talked about it before, and we both thought it wasn’t still the right time.

There’s only so much humiliation I can take. I have to think about him, and me as two separate individuals.

11:40, just in time.

As I opened the door to the restaurant, I immediately spotted wonwoo, on his phone, waiting at a corner booth near the window.

“Hi.” I said as I approached. “Hi.” He smiled back. I took my seat opposite from him, thinking about keeping my heart rate in check. Why am I so nervous? We’ve eaten together lots of times…

“To be completely honest, I wasn’t sure you’d show up. But I’m happy you did.” He smiled. “Really? I was thinking about the same thing before I got here.” I laughed. I really was. Maybe he felt uncomfortable and didn’t want to go after all. I was ready to wait and get stood up. But…here we are.

“Why would you think I wouldn’t show?” he asked, handing me the menu that lay on the side of our table. “oh I don’t know, maybe cause of the fact that you liked me, I rejected you, we fought, I kissed you, then you realized I wasn’t what you wanted after all?” I said, awkwardly smiling. As did he…

“Way to sum that up,” he laughed. Taking off his cap and putting that beside him.

“Oh wow…” he already got his haircut. He still looks good though, damn.

“Yeah… I know. Weird” he chuckled. It is. But it’s good weird. “You still look nice. Don’t worry.” I said reassuringly.

“And, I’m not the only one who got a makeover. You have two new piercings.” He chuckled in awe. “You noticed that?” I gasped. “It’s hard not to. It’s pretty obvious.”

“I actually got three but I ran out of earrings to pair it nicely with so I left one bare.” “Nice.” He smiled.

Soon after we got our order taken. I had seafood pasta and he had steak pasta. Then we also ordered a side of ranch fries to share as well as nachos with sour cream. Seemed a lot but the portions were small, and this was surprisingly for both of us, our first meal of the day. 

“You know this is the first time you ordered something with seafood? Why is that?” he said curiously. “When I was dating him, I refrained from ordering it because he was allergic to shellfish. And most of the time we shared food. I just kind of got used to it but now, I can again.”

He nodded in understanding. Before it would be an awkward topic or not a topic at all since we established our rules, but now… everything is out of the bag. I felt it was okay to bring it up. Considering it was now in the past.

“Wait, so you don’t see each other anymore?” he asked. I wasn’t sure how this is what interested him, but ok. “No, not since he debuted again.” I said.

“He’s busy running his company and being famous and I’m a double major. I help when I can but it was taking up so much of my time, you know? I figured as much but music professors assign so much homework. And they’re all so…” “Time consumin