Sorry
A Reason to Live"What are you doing here?" Wheein asks, her face cold without any signs of emotion.
It's been a month since their supposed 'date'.
A whole month.
Wheein expected Byul to visit her with flowers the next day after their date, but she concluded that it was too much to ask.
Surely, she's worth, at least, a text or a call from Byul, right? But apparently, Wheein waited for nothing. She knows it's her fault that she expected anything from Moonbyul, but she couldn't help but be disappointed.
Because in those 30 days that she waited; she has never felt so worthless.
She didn't know what to do. She almost went to Byul; if only Hyejin didn't stop her.
She was that desperate.
She has never felt so much pain in her heart -and she's someone who's so used to feeling pain.
And now Byul's at their front door with flowers in hand, "Wheein..." she trailed off, and Wheein wanted to tell her that she'd better come prepared. Wheein would like to think that Byul took a month to gather her thoughts, to practice what she has to say -but it seemed like Byul didn't even know what to say to her still.
Up until now, Byul looked so unsure. And Wheein hates it.
"I'm sorry." Byul says.
Wheein snickers, Byul's words, or lack thereof, rubbed Wheein in all the wrong ways. Her anger rose so quickly that she felt like she might have a heart attack at any moment.
"Sorry?!" Wheein questions. "It took you a month just to say sorry?!"
Moonbyul retained her composure despite Wheein's temper. She acknowledges that she deserved it.
She's been meaning to apologize to Wheein since that day, but she didn't know what change that could make. She wanted to be sure. She wanted to be sure that she can do it; that she can move on. She tried driving to Wheein's house a couple of times, but she didn't have the guts to actually let Wheein see her.
"Wheein, please..." Byul took a step towards Wheein, placing a hand on Wheein's arm in an attempt to somehow calm her down.
"Please, what?" Wheein asks, brushing off Byul's touch, as she gave her a cold stare that Byul couldn't help but look away with guilt.
"Please be a bit more understanding of me." Byul pleads in a low voice; she knows she might be asking for too much.
Wheein chuckles without humor. "You want me to understand you?" Wheein questions, Byul's asking as if that's not what she's trying to do all this time.
Sometimes, Wheein can be a selfish person, she acknowledges that. Wanting Byul, in itself, was her being selfish. But she was also very considerate of Byul's feelings. She tried to be understanding, even in times when it hurts her. She could swear she tried -heck, she's trying right now, but Byul makes it so hard to do so.
"Byul, how can I understand you, if you can't even understand yourself?" Wheein asks, this time without anger, but frustration.
Byul struggled to give Wheein the right answer, but she comes up short.
"You're right." Byul admits. "My mind was all over the place. But Wheein..." Byul trailed off, careful to find the right words, knowing that she was standing on thin ice, and she doesn't want to lose another person important in her life. "I want you to know that I tried...I really want to keep you in my life. And I'm really sorry...about everything."
"Sorry?" Wheein hates that word because it only reminds her of how much a person had hurt her. "Sorry, again?" Wheein questions, she's heard that word a million times, not just from Moonbyul - but somehow Byul's sorry hurt the worst, because no matter how many times she says it, they always run back in circles. "What makes your sorry different from all your other 'sorry's'?"
Byul didn't know the answer to that. All she knows is that she meant it every single time she said it. Proving it, however, is a different story.
She'd give anything just so Wheein would give her a chance to figure out how to pro
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