“You’re not going.” Soonyoung’s voice was not mad, but not calm. Not demanding and yet not soft. He was confusing the hell out of Jihoon, who simply wanted to scream at Soonyoung and demand to know what emotions he was feeling. Once Soonyoung had read the message the older boy had immediately sat up and Jihoon had followed his actions soon after also sitting and watching Soonyoung; who had been quiet fuming until finally speaking the emotionless words.

“I’m not?” Jihoon had meant it as a statement but the words had come out more as a question, as if he really wasn’t sure if Soonyoung meant it or not. Why the hell would Jihoon go? His douchebag ex texts him randomly after ignoring him for so long simply because they’re taking a vacation at the same resort and suddenly it’s like Jihoon is under Seungcheol’s control again. He feels like he has to go.

“You’re not.” Soonyoung snapped back finally showing how angry he already was at this situation. Jihoon nodded and bowed his head in shame. It was so shameful; Soonyoung had stated the obvious but because Jihoon’s stupid brain wouldn’t let go of Seungcheol; Jihoon had now fed Soonyoung’s anger.

Jihoon felt sick again.

Soonyoung finally took a deep breath and pulled Jihoon’s head to his chest running his fingers through his cute boyfriends hair. There were soft whispered sorry’s from either boy which they both rejected equally. They both blamed themselves. Jihoon was sick of feeling sorry, sick of hurting Soonyoung in every way simply because his past haunted him like a nasty bug bite.

“I’m going…” Jihoon said the words softly but with a new found confidence. “I have to…”

“Why?” Soonyoung sighed out the question keeping the same soft tone Jihoon had also held. Both speaking as if their voices might break everything if spoken higher than a whisper.

J