Kim Jongin

We were supposed to leave but had to stay due to request from Kris and his Boyfriend for dinner. Luhan says Kris is cold faced but soft-hearted. Well I haven’t met him much so I don’t know. Sejoon was standing beside me and conversing with me and Luhan, after our dance had ended and had agreed after Kris’s boyfriend Tao had begged him too. Tao had taken him to meet a few people; taken an instant liking to Sejoon. Well can’t be helped, he’s been different after returning from States. Not that I’m complaining, States literally did him good.

Those two are the cutest; they can't keep away from each other. After I got introduced to Bae Suzy by Luhan, they got too engrossed into their own conversation. Luhan seems to enjoy her company and I became a major third wheel. No one likes to be a third wheel. Experiencing it firsthand kind of hurts, two people talking it out with each other while another person just watches and stares not involved at all.
I look for my 'beloved' for he is nowhere to be found. It’s been at least 20 minutes and I haven't seen him talking to anybody here, this is important for both of our business careers, where is he? Suddenly my phone rings. I excuse myself and walk to the hallway to receive the call.

Oh Sehun

"Hey have you seen Kai." I say tapping Kris' shoulder having to put my arm up a little higher than usual. He turns to me with a blank face, typical Kris I have come to know.
"Uh yea, I think I saw him walk over to the hallway to talk to someone on the phone." He said pointing to the hallway Kai had entered.
"Thanks buddy." I wink and walk towards the direction of Kai. Though I don’t miss the slight curve upwards on Kris lips.
 

As I grow nearer walking slowly; I begin to here a muffled voice, the voice that I have come to recognize. Kai’s voice seemed calm but there seemed to be a hidden spit behind it, and a bit of sadness that I detected.
"Yea Sejoon, I love you." He says at last. Did he know I was here? And why the sudden confession. I giggle to myself.
I walk closer towards him and turn at the corner he was hiding at. He couldn't have known I was here; he wouldn't even be able to see me. He was looking over to the lawn from the balcony in the hallway. But my footsteps alerted him and he turned around with his phone in his right hand.  In a split second I understood everything. He wasn’t talking to me at all but to the real Sejoon who seemed to be on the phone if the ID flashing on the screen said something. . I stare at him in shock, as he stares back at me with an expressionless face. His phone was still in his hand and the screen was still bright, allowing me to see the information on it. Joon was still on the line and I could hear the faint traces of Joon’s voices floating from the speaker. Kai kept on staring at me while he brings the phone to his ear -

“I call you later Joon, I need to go, bye.” He disconnects the call and puts the phone in his pocket.

That wasn't my imagination when I thought I heard retreating feet behind my back that was real. And those were Kai's feet. Kai walked towards me, but he didn’t stop. He continues to walk as he turns the corner heading back to the party, ignoring me like I didn’t exist. And this hurt more than any pain I would ever feel in the entire life. My heart banged in my chest and I just wanted to rip it out, to end my suffering. I don’t know why but I felt ripped piece by piece with each step he took away from me.

But I had to be strong; I have to explain to him why. I try to move but my knees buckle under me causing me to fall to the ground hard. My breathing becomes uneven as I try to steady myself on the wall and stand. To run after him. It didn't work. I fall back on the ground and a small sob escapes my lips.
Oh god, why is this affecting me so much. A tear streams down my face as I hear small footsteps walking over to me slowly.
 

"Sehun?" Luhan's voice came from around the corner. He sounded curious and concerned.
I muffle my next sob before he could hear it. He's helped me so much, and I ruined everything. All the pain he bared is of no use now. I tried to help but destroyed everything in turn.
"Oh god- Sehun!" I watch Luhan through my watery eyes as he runs towards me.
"What the happened?!" He kneeled down and hugged me in his arms tightly.
"He- he found ... Out...found Lu." I sniff through my words trying to hold back the tears. It seemed to work, for the tears stopped. For now.

Luhan looked at me with concern and worry filling his face. He rubbed my back gently as he leaned in and hugged me, his face next to mine as he whispered soothing, reassured words in my ear.
“It’s going to be ok. It’s fine. I love you, Sehun. You have to be strong tiger.”

But this time his words didn’t calm me down at all. I felt weirdly hurt.

"Uh ... I'll just come back later." A voice says awkwardly.
 

I look to find Kyungsoo looking down with disappointment in his eyes.  Kyungsoo was Kai’s best friend and I’m sure; me being Kai’s fiancé, he mistook me trying to be close to Luhan, since the first day he saw us hugging in the mansion. He looks back up as I looked at him with my red face and his eyes widen.
"Oh Jesus! What happened?" Kyungsoo jogs towards me and kneels down along the side of Luhan.
He puts his hand on Lu's shoulder as Luhan was still hugging me and I feel him stiffen a bit. This guy seriously hated Sejoon’s guts for some reason. His face scrunches up in a weird way which makes me want to pull his cheeks. I sniff.

“Cute." I say before putting my head back into Luhan's chest, to continue my mourning. Kyungsoo flushes by Luhan cackles at my timing.
 

"So what you're saying is, Jongin found out you're not the person you were forced to be?"
I nod in response to Kyungsoo question as he scratches his head with confusion. We moved from the hallway and into a secluded area so that way it was more secret, no one would over hear us in here.
"What's your actual name then? It's not Sejoon?" Kyungsoo says in a low voice just to make sure no one was there at the moment besides us three.
"Oh Sehun.”I say nonchalantly for the scene that happened earlier still somehow haunted me.
"Oh Sehun? How come you look so much like