Chapter 13

In the following days I tried so hard to ignore my feelings so that she won’t freak out. In a weeks’ time we’ll be leaving for the States and until now she’s trying to convince me not to go but I’m determined to go with her. I need to go to the bottom of this, why she’s doing this and I just can’t accept that she’s marrying him, she’s inlove with me then and now, I know that for a fact.

We had dinner at their house that night. We haven’t been eating together for a while because my dad went on trip for the new car model they are developing and my mom tagged along. I usually eat at the office and went straight to bed went I got home. Luckily, George got some engagement and couldn’t have dinner with us. Our parents were chatting after dinner so I decided to ask her to go out and have a walk. We are silently walking when she tripped to something so I had to catch her before she falls down and I couldn’t help but be carried away by my feelings for her.

“I’m tired of pretending I don’t like to taste your lips again” (I gently pulled her to me and claimed her lips. We were both grasping for breathe when I released her) “I don’t want to pretend anymore” (I’m still cupping her face with my hands, my heartbeat still so uneven. I took a quick kiss before asking) “Would you take me then?” (To my surprise she began crying all of a sudden)

“You can’t. This is not true; you can’t. I told you…not to” (She cried continuously, I hugged her tightly)

“Stop crying, were going to be drowned” (I cupped her face and wipe her tears with my thumb finger) “Stop crying already, your nose would block and you won’t be able to breathe. Listen to me” (I kissed her forehead and said) I love the way you called me Yalun, you’re the only one I allowed to call me that” (I kissed her nose) “I love the way you courageously confessed to me before and I’m sorry for hurting you” (I kissed her left cheek) “I love the way you love me until now” (I kissed her right cheek) “I love you then…and I’m still inlove with you now and forever” (before claiming her lips, she was still crying in my arms when she suddenly pushed me away)

“No! You can’t…you can’t…don’t…don’t love me” (and then she runs away. I was left so confused by her reaction)

I tried to follow her but I was greeted by my mom’s curious eyes when I entered the house. I decided to let her go and be alone for a while. Me and mom went home to talk, I really need someone to talk to, I miss my mom for the past weeks they’ve been away.

“So what happened? Did you tell her?”

“Yes”

“And what happened? Why is she crying? We’ve been away for
a couple of weeks; I thought everything will fall in the right place when we come back”

“I can’t understand why she’s refusing me Mom, two weeks ago I got a feeling that everything will be alright, and we even agreed that I’ll go with her when she returns to the States. Uncle said she and George had a previous agreement to do some voluntary work when they’re both free and since George got time they’ll be going to do that and I intend to go with them but just the other week she said she’s marrying him”

“What??!”

“And Uncle seems to know about it. I’m also confused with Uncle Ali, he said he wished that everything will be alright between me and Gui Gui but now…I don’t know Mom”

“Alright, we all know that you and Gui Gui love each other. It’s just that she was so young back then and it was not the proper time but now your love has been given another chance. I’m going to figure this out. Your dad and your Uncle Ali are talking right now and I’ll ask your dad later. Go and have some rest now, you look so exhausted”
***

(Ali and Joey talking upstairs)

“What’s the problem?” (Joey asked. He instantly know something’s wrong with Ali since he arrived)

“Nothing”

“You look the same, it’s that look. I know that look, you’re like that when Gui Gui said she’ll be staying in the States and I also noticed that look when you arrived from the States with Gui Gui and you told me the same thing, nothing’s wrong. Is it about Gui Gui?”

(Ali sighs) “I really don’t want to tell you this since
Aaron’s also involve in this, you know I love him as my own. And it hurt me to see them like this; Gui Gui and Aaron love each other”

“We all know that and we as parents agreed to step aside and let them be, it’s their business”

“If only I didn’t ask him not to let my daughter go with him before”

“Stop feeling guilty over that matter already. Aaron knows that he needs to let her go for her to discover things on her own and learn. The world has so many things to offer and we all can see that it went well on her”

“But Gui Gui’s going back to the States”

“Aaron knows what to do about that, he said he’ll be coming with her. He already informed us about that. Are you worried that she’ll stay there again for a long time?”

“I’m afraid that she won’t be coming back”

“What?” (Joey asked shocked by what Ali said. Ali decided to tell him everything)
***

We haven’t seen each other for 34 hours and I can’t take it anymore. Mom didn’t get any information from dad.

“I can’t take it anymore. We’re going to talk now!” (I storm in her room)

“Yalun…”

“I’m tired playing this game. Four years ago you left without even saying a thing after saying that you love me, that you’re inlove with me, after two years you talked to me but avoided everything that happened. Another two years later, you’re back turning my world upside down; you announce our marriage then you took it back. You acted like a good sister, a good friend, making me feel unwanted”

“Yalun”

“I’ve listened everytime. Now, it’s your time to listen to me. I love you, I have love you even before. Don’t ask me when cause I don’t know when did it start. All I know is that I love you. I’m sorry that it took time before I realized it, you left already. I wanted so badly to follow you but I can’t. I owe you that time for yourself. For you to heal, for you to learn. When you returned I am happy, it feels like my heart’s going to bursts any second. Right there and then I wanted to confess but I can feel it, you’re still hurting. I was trying so hard to make you feel at ease. I was hurt when you’re hiding things from me and I was jealous to every guy near you. It’s driving me crazy. I’m trying to buy time to show you how I feel, my sincerity. Can’t you feel it? Don’t you know how much I love you?”

“I do…” (she whispered)

“Do you love me?”

“I do…”

“Then, why do you have to lie to me? why do you have to reject me?!” (I shouted. I was so frustrated and confused)

“Yalun…” (She started crying. I walk closer to her. I sat beside her and hug her)

“Just tell me what’s the problem? hmm…”
She didn’t tell me anything, she just stay there in my arms crying until she falls asleep. I watch her sleep for I don’t know how long before I decided to go home. I’m telling myself that after that, everything will be alright but I was so shocked that she left the next day with George”
***