"So, Doc, how was Greece?" Ji-a asked eagerly of Jan, who sat on Ji-a's hospital bed.

"It was amazing, Ji-a!" Jan Di smiled at her young friend and pulled out her phone to show her some pictures.

Ji-a sat up to see them, as she clutched a pink stuffed bear. Ji-a had told Jan Di that she knew she was too old to have it, but she still loved it and it had special meaning to her, since it was gifted by her grandmother who had passed on. Ji-a had said that it brought her comfort when she was afraid. Jan Di had reassured Ji-a that there was nothing wrong with that.

"Wow, I wish I could go there…," Ji-a mused, suddenly appearing a bit sad.

Jan Di put a hand on her shoulder, "Perhaps you will someday. You're going to be out of here in no time!" Jan Di gave the girl a reassuring smile. Ji-a smiled back.

"So, you and Doc Yoon, huh?" Ji-a raised a brow, "Nice…" Apparently word had even reached Pediatrics.

Jan Di smirked. Such a suggestive tone for a soon-to-be 9 year old holding a stuffed bear!

"Yes, Ji-a. We're married. I'm sorry we kept it hidden from you." Jan Di pursed her lips and smoothed Ji-a's blanket.

"It's OK. I kind of figured you two were an item, anyway…," Ji-a grinned at Jan Di. Jan Di felt a light blush form for some reason, "…But why did you hide it, Doc?"

"I just didn't want to advertise it," Jan Di replied, matter-of-factly.

"If I was married to Doc Yoon…," Ji-a looked off into the distance dreamily, as if she was imagining just that, "…I'd advertise it… I'd make sure the whole hospital knew that he was all mine."

Jan Di's mouth hung open for a moment. "Ji-a!"

Jan Di gave her a semi-chastising look, "You're far too worldly for your age, Ji-a."

Ji-a simply giggled, and Jan Di couldn't help but laugh, too. Ji-a's laughter was infectious.

"How are you feeling, Ji-a?"

"Just a little tired…"

Jan Di looked at her sympathetically. Ji-a just had a chemotherapy treatment, and Jan Di had come down to visit with her on her lunch break. "You should rest," Jan Di said, and Ji-a lay back down. Jan Di tucked the hospital blanket around her, surrounding Ji-a with cute baby animals.

"Thanks, Doc."

"Are you feeling sick at all?"

"No. I'm Ok." Ji-a embraced her bear. "Thanks for visiting me."

"Anytime, Ji-a! I love visiting you. I only wish I had more time to. Oh, and Doc Yoon sends his regards. He wanted to visit you, too, but he's in surgery."

Ji-a closed her eyes and smiled.

Jan Di heard the familiar beep and felt the vibration of her pager. She looked at it. "Oh, I'm sorry, Ji-a, but Dr. Jang is paging me."

"What does the meanie want now?" Ji-a mumbled, opening her large chocolate eyes.

"He's actually been a lot nicer lately, Ji-a… He even made it possible for me to go to Greece and took the flight with me. But, I gotta go! I'll see you later." Jan Di squeezed Ji'a's hand and quickly left. Ji-a gave a feeble wave as Jan Di exited.

Jan Di made her way to room 302 where she'd been paged. "Yes, Seonsaengnim?" she asked upon arrival.

"Place a pulmonary artery catheter for me," he instructed immediately without so much as a greeting.

"Yes, Seonsaengnim," Jan Di put on gloves. She punctured the area and inserted the wire into the vein.

"Where were you?" Dr. Jang asked gruffly, as he leaned closer to observe her work.

"I was in Pediatrics," Jan Di replied, hooking up the tube.

"What were you doing there?" Dr. Jang grumbled.

I guess meanie is back after all… "I was visiting one of the patients there. She had chemotherapy today."

Dr. Jang sighed, "Those aren't your patients."

"I know. But I like them, and I was on my lunch anyway."

He sighed again.

"Something wrong?" she asked, as she finished the procedure.

"No."

Jan Di looked at Dr. Jang and pursed her lips. "OK then…" She'd drop it. "Was there anything else?"

"No, that'll be all. Go and make your rounds. And don't forget your paperwork," he said without looking at her and focusing upon the patient's chart.

"Yes, Seonsaengnim," Jan Di bowed and took her leave.

Dr. Jang had been acting different since their return from Greece. It was like he'd reverted back to the first day she met him. Jan Di wondered about what could have brought on such a change, as she went about her rounds. But she had far too much on her mind to give it too much thought. Aside from work, she had an appointment later with the OB/GYN that she was feeling a bit anxious about.

Jan Di and Ji Hoo were home for the night, and the appointment had gone well. They sat on the couch, Ji Hoo with his arm around Jan Di, reading a pregnancy book together. Jan Di cringed as she read about what she had to look forward to during pregnancy. She looked up at Ji Hoo, slightly mortified.

"I know that I want to specialize in Obstetrics, but it's another thing entirely to go through it myself…"

Ji Hoo chuckled, "I'm sorry, darling. Yeah, I don't envy you..." He ran his hand up and down her arm.

Jan Di smirked, "Sure you don't want to do it instead?"

Ji Hoo laughed, "I don't. But, I would go through it for you if I could."

Jan Di smiled at his oddly sweet response to her strange remark. She gave a short laugh, wondering if he truly would do such a thing if it were medically possible.

Jan Di decided to switch gears. "Well, I better study now," she moved on to her medical textbook. She was beginning to study for the KMLE to become a licensed doctor. There was so much to know, and she was finding it very overwhelming. Jan Di released a long sigh, as she thumbed through her textbook.

Ji Hoo kissed her forehead, "Would you like some help studying?"

"Oh, no," she shook her head, "You don't have time for that. You have way too much paperwork."

"Well, I do have paperwork, but I'll get it done. I don't want you to be stressed. It's not good for you and the baby."

Jan Di leaned upward and placed a gentle kiss upon his lips. "Thank you, Honey, but don't worry."

Ji Hoo kissed her again and gave her a smile, "OK, I'll try." He adjusted his glasses and reached across the table to grab a stack of files. He pulled out his clipboard.

Ji Hoo's hand glided over the post-operative paperwork, and Jan Di couldn't help but observe for a moment. His writing was fluid, smooth, as was everything he did. It was almost calligraphy. Every other medical professional's writing, including Jan Di's, looked like chicken scratch. It was only natural given the amount of writing they had to do, but somehow Ji Hoo's writing was flawless, just like him... And consequently, he had amazing concentration. He didn't even look at her, yet she noticed the hint of a smile on his lips, so she knew that he knew she was watching him in awe. Jan Di smiled to herself and went back to her studying. She treasured these moments with him, just being close, even if they were both working on their own stuff.

Ji Hoo finished his paperwork and glanced to Jan Di, who was in full study mode. He noticed a chunk of hair fall over her eyes, as she focused upon the book. He smiled lovingly and brushed it back for her.

"I think you're due for a trim, Otter."

"Hm?" she'd barely registered his voice. "Oh, yeah I guess I'm overdue," she chuckled, as she smoothed back her bangs.

"Sorry I've been remiss with your bangs, my love."

"It's OK, you're busy."

"I'm going to cut it right now… You need to be able to see what you're doing," he said with a grin.

"You don't have to—," she began, but Ji Hoo had already taken the book from her and placed it on the coffee table. He took her hand and delicately pulled her up with him.

Ji Hoo had been Jan Di's regular stylist ever since the first time he'd trimmed her bangs. She liked the familiarity of it, the closeness, and the way he seemed to express his love for her even in the way he cut her hair. He would always wrap her in a barber's cloak, give his signature twirl of the clippers, and begin. She trusted him completely, and he took the responsibility very seriously.

She recalled once being overcome with temptation and trying to kiss him when he got close. And he'd scolded her, actually scolded her for disrupting his work. Of course, it had been a playful scolding, and he'd smiled in response to her pout before going back to the task at hand. When he finished he asked for payment. The payment he asked for was always the same since they began dating, a kiss.

After finishing with her hair that evening, Ji Hoo requested his usual payment. She leaned up, and he came down simultaneously for a soft kiss. Then, they exchanged another. And then another… And before they knew it they were on the couch again. Her head was cradled in the crook of his arm, her legs perpendicular to his, and his hand rested on her thigh. Their lips were interlocked and moved in perfect harmony and at just the right tempo, a technique they'd perfected over the hundreds of other times they'd done this.

Grandfather walked in at that moment, startling them. "Sorry about that," he held up his hands in apology. And they had to laugh when he averted his eyes and shuffled off toward his room, tossing them a casual "Carry on" over his shoulder. Ji Hoo and Jan Di looked at each other and smiled. Ji Hoo shook his head and took her face gently in his hands to give her a slow, deep kiss.

He broke the kiss and glanced at his watch, "Time for bed then?"

It wasn't the first time Grandfather had walked in on one of their passionate moments, and they recalled a time when he was not so casual about it.

Once when they were dating, Jan Di and Ji Hoo had allowed their passion to run wild and were practically horizontal on the couch, kissing. She had her arms snug around his neck and he was nearly on top of her, pressing into her and running his hands up and down, wavering dangerously near previously unexplored territory.

Grandfather's timing had been impeccable, and he had arrived home just then. He loudly cleared his throat to alert them to his presence. Jan Di had excused herself and run off, humiliated. And Ji Hoo prepared himself for the lecture like a good, respectful grandson. Grandfather knew that Ji Hoo was probably too old for such a talk and that it wasn't necessarily his place any longer, but he had spoken to Ji Hoo regardless. Ji Hoo had assured Grandfather for the second time that he wasn't planning to corrupt Jan Di in any way and had apologized for getting a bit too carried away.

Now that they were married Grandfather had no problem with the lovebirds' romance and even encouraged it in his own subtle ways. Grandfather tried to give Jan Di and Ji Hoo their space now and then. He would occasionally go on a fishing trip, for instance.

Once, Grandfather had told Ji Hoo about a fishing trip he was planning, and Ji Hoo had wanted to go along. Grandfather had shaken his head at his grandson's cluelessness and reminded him that he would be gone all weekend and that they would have the house all to themselves. Grandfather had then winked at him, and Ji Hoo had laughed.

Jan Di and Ji Hoo had always been comfortable with each other, but taking their relationship from friendship to romance was a different story. After Jan Di confessed her love to Ji Hoo and then almost immediately pushed him away toward Nurse Park, there had been the initial frustration. That frustration had led to a passionate moment, and then they had their second date, many years after the first. After the initial euphoria of finally being together wore off, Jan Di and Ji Hoo decided to openly discuss their relationship. At first, they worried about the awkwardness of going from friends to lovers, but they soon realized it was ill-founded. And their love was completely natural.

Jan Di and Ji Hoo's love had grown and matured from childhood to a briefly awkward adolescence to adulthood. Their relationship began as a sweet and innocent one, with hugs, of hair, hand-holding, cuddling, a kiss to the forehead here, a chaste kiss to the lips there… Jan Di was still relatively inexperienced with relationships, and Ji Hoo did his best to take things slow with his beloved. He never wanted to push her or make her uncomfortable. But, he had to admit that she surprised him at times. His first surprise had come when she snuck to his room one night after only a month of dating. Her intentions had been pure, of course; she'd only wanted to watch a movie in there with him. He had to smile at how cutely nervous she'd been about asking to join him in his bedroom.

That night, Ji Hoo was reading a novel in bed when he heard a light rapping on the shoji doors. Jan Di peeked in after receiving approval, and he took off his glasses and gifted her with that smile that drove her wild. She shyly asked if he wanted to watch a movie with her. He agreed, of course, and bid her to join him in the bed. He patted the bed lightly and gave her an impish grin. The wattage of her blush could have blinded, and she had no choice but to obey immediately.

Jan Di initially left a little space between them; Ji Hoo quickly corrected that by making the bold move of putting his arm around her and pulling her into him. She soon relaxed and wrapped her arms around him and snuggled in closer. They somehow made it through their first movie in his room, mostly… Jan Di fell asleep against Ji Hoo's chest three-quarters of the way through. Ji Hoo didn't mind, though. He enjoyed watching her sleep. He hit the button on the remote. He kissed her head, wrapped her up tightly, and closed his eyes.

They spent many a night innocently sleeping in his bed, becoming more and more comfortable, and often waking up in each other's embrace. Ji Hoo would grin when every morning Jan Di snuck back to her own room to give Grandfather the impression that she'd slept there all night. It felt a bit silly given that they were 23 and 25 years old and hadn't "done anything," but he played along.

It didn't take long for their relationship to progress to an adolescent stage, with deeper, more exploratory kisses and caresses and the inability to keep their hands off each other. Not only were the feelings there but so was the chemistry, and then the problem became about self-control. Movies became increasingly difficult to watch together. More times than not they would be too occupied with each other to enjoy the movie. It was even difficult in public, though they did their best to restrain themselves around others. Luckily for them, Ji Hoo had his own private theater and often they were there or in his room. And they did everything together. They had always done everything together, even couples activities, but now they were finally free to experience those activities as they were truly intended.

Ji Hoo was a gentleman in the truest sense of the word, especially when it came to Jan Di, but even Ji Hoo struggled to control himself with her. And her increasing boldness and continued insistence upon sleeping next to him didn't make it any easier for him to maintain the semblance of self-control.

Ji Hoo eventually, very, very slowly tested boundaries with Jan Di, exploring, experiencing, teaching… And she continued to surprise him. There were numerous times when the sensations and being so near and intimate proved to be nearly too much for Ji Hoo, for both of them actually. And Ji Hoo had considered banishing her from his room on more than a few occasions when on the brink and fearing that his willpower had all but vanished.

Considering the amount of time they'd known each other, their relationship was still relatively new, having only been together for about 2 years and only married for about 6 months. They'd faced so many obstacles to being together, but now they were free to display any kind of affection toward each other that they so desired. Their relationship had reached adulthood, and they took advantage of that.

That wasn't to say that there were no challenges. Time was a factor, as was privacy, despite how much they loved Grandfather and appreciated his attempts to remedy this. Ji Hoo had lived alone for the longest time and had never really considered privacy an issue when it came to having a girl over, though this had only consisted of rare visits from Seo Hyun prior to Jan Di. But, Grandfather seemed immune to their affectionate displays now, and their embarrassment had likewise diminished.

Despite their busy schedules, Ji Hoo and Jan Di made time for romance, particularly Ji Hoo, who was adamant about it. He refused to let things grow stale between them. They continued to do sweet things for each other. She'd leave him a love note; he'd write a song and play it for her. They continued to express their love through words and actions, and Ji Hoo always sought new ways to bring romance to Jan Di.

F2 and Ga Eul had been eager to see Jan Di and Ji Hoo since their return from Greece, so they had invited them out to dinner. Jan Di and Ji Hoo's group, which included Yi Jeong, Ga Eul, Woo Bin, and his date sat together dressed in their finest at one of their favorite restaurants, one that required reservations way in advance or a close connection with one of the members of F4 to get in. The restaurant was intimate and romantic, with a beautiful view of the city and lovely soft blue lighting.

Jan Di and Ji Hoo talked about their trip. Jan Di and Ga Eul chatted about wedding plans, and the group made idle conversation during dinner. Jan Di noticed that Ga Eul had been smiling at her kind of funny all evening, and she seemed anxious about something.

"So, what's new, Jan Di?" Ga Eul finally asked, wearing that smile again.

"Well…," Jan Di glanced at Ji Hoo beside her. He simply nodded, as if to say "Go ahead…"

"Well, everyone…," Ji Hoo took Jan Di's hand and squeezed it. "…We're going to have a baby," Jan Di said with a smile.

Ga Eul let out a barely subdued scream and got out of her chair. She went to Jan Di and wrapped her arms around her and then hugged Ji Hoo.

Yi Jeong and Woo Bin smiled widely. "Congratulations," Yi Jeong said with a cool smile.

"Congratulations, man!" Woo Bin exclaimed and clasped Ji Hoo's hand across the table. Woo Bin planted a kiss on Jan Di's cheek, and she felt herself blush. She looked to Ji Hoo, and he shook his head good-naturedly. She hoped that Woo Bin's date hadn't minded.

"Yes, congratulations, you two!" Woo Bin's date joined in. She didn't seem upset.

Ji Hoo and Jan Di smiled and thanked them, and Ji Hoo kissed Jan Di's hand tenderly.

"Wow, you actually procreated," Yi Jeong teased Ji Hoo. Ji Hoo shot him a dirty look but then shook his head and smiled.

"How far along are you, Jan Di?" Ga Eul asked.

"About 6 weeks now. Two weeks are added, though."

"And you've been to the doctor?" Yi Jeong asked.

"Yes, so far everything is healthy."

"Good! Oh, I'm so excited for you two!" Ga Eul squealed. Jan Di smiled at her and then turned to Ji Hoo, and they smiled at one another.

Jan Di turned to Ga Eul and smiled crookedly, "But Ga Eul…did you know something?"

Ga Eul gaped at Jan Di, clearly caught off-guard, "Um, well...what makes you say that?"

"Just a feeling," Jan Di smirked. Her dear friend Ga Eul was not so good at masking her emotions.

Ga Eul looked to Yi Jeong. He simply smiled and put his arm around her. Ga Eul sighed, "OK, we knew…"

Woo Bin looked at Yi Jeong curiously.

"How long have you known, Ga Eul?" Jan Di asked, and she and Ji Hoo exchanged looks with each other and with Yi Jeong and Ga Eul.

"Well, since before you left for Greece…," Ga Eul admitted.

Ji Hoo stared at them. "You guys knew before me?"

"We're sorry, Ji Hoo Sunbae, but Yi Jeong Sunbae figured it out because Jan Di was getting sick," Ga Eul replied.

Ji Hoo sighed, "So, three people knew about it before I did? Anyone else, Jan Di?" He gave her a semi-chastising look, but she knew he wasn't really angry. She looked at him sheepishly.

"Sorry, Ji Hoo-yah…," her brow wrinkled, and he softened and ruffled her hair. "It's OK. It doesn't matter." Ji Hoo took Jan Di's hand and kissed it again. "I'm just so happy about it."

"Aww," Ga Eul squealed. Yi Jeong smiled and ran his hand up and down Ga Eul's slender arm. He kissed her on the cheek.

"So, how's Joon Pyo?" Woo Bin asked, changing the subject, "You guys heard from him since he got back from Paris?"

"I talked to him briefly," Yi Jeong said, "He's back now. All he did was complain about the trip."

Woo Bin grinned.

"I guess he and Alex ran into Seo Hyun while they were there," Ji Hoo chimed in, "Oh, and she told me that she wants us to visit her in Paris sometime soon, by the way," Ji Hoo said, turning to Jan Di.

Jan Di looked at Ji Hoo curiously, her water glass poised near her lips, "Oh. You talked to Seo Hyun?"

Woo Bin and Yi Jeong exchanged a glance. Yi Jeong raised a brow at Ji Hoo. Oops…

"Yes, briefly, a few days ago. I'm sorry I forgot to mention it," Ji Hoo replied, looking at Jan Di once more.

"It's OK," Jan Di pursed her lips slightly. She took a sip of her water and set her glass down. She poked at her food, and Ji Hoo studied her.

"That'd be nice to visit Unnie in Paris," Jan Di said with a smile, her mood apparently flipped.

They all collectively breathed a sigh of relief that Jan Di no longer seemed upset by the mention of Seo Hyun, and they continued with their meal.

The next day began as a slow one at the hospital, and Jan Di was occupying herself by catching up on paperwork and checking on patients. Without warning, the sleepy ER was immediately alert when a series of automobile accident victims were brought in. A truck driver had hit a car head-on, causing a large pile up. The two victims from the car, a father and son, were in serious condition.

Jan Di had never experienced so many patients being admitted at one time, and it was overwhelming. As attending, Dr. Jang assessed the situation, going from patient to patient and determining priority of treatment. Dr. Jang was coolly giving orders right and left. Jan Di felt herself moving in a haze, almost as if she was in slow motion. She felt herself momentarily freeze and Dr. Jang yanked her by the arm over to the bed of the young boy, snapping her out of it. He also called over Mi-Nyu and several nurses for resuscitation and airway management.

Dr. Jang, Jan Di, Mi-Nyu, and the rest of the team treated each of the victims in order of severity. There were several head and neck injuries, a rib fracture, and a penetrating abdominal injury. Dr. Jang talked with several specialists regarding the patients once the life-threatening injuries were stabilized.

The father of the boy was immediately taken for emergency surgery. Ji Hoo's was put in charge and his attending assisted. The patient was brought in and the nurse informed Ji Hoo that it was a serious penetrating chest injury. Ji Hoo and the team carefully removed the debris from the man's chest. A small piece had wedged into the heart.

"Forceps."

A stream of crimson began to flow once the debris was removed. "Hemostat," Ji Hoo requested, and he constricted the blood vessel with the tool. Then, he and an assisting surgeon pressed down to minimize the bleeding.

"Dr. Yoon, the aorta was torn…," his sunbae informed him, as more blood began spilling into the chest cavity. Ji Hoo glanced over and nodded.

"He's hemorrhaging," one of the assisting surgeons said.

"Why is there so much blood?" another asked.

Ji Hoo sighed, "It's an aortic dissection…we need to repair the valve before it ruptures." A surgical assistant wiped Ji Hoo's brow. "We have to move quickly; minimize the bleeding as best you can," Ji Hoo instructed, glancing at the patient's vitals on the slow-beeping monitor. Ji Hoo and his sunbae began repairing the heart.

"BP is dropping…," an assistant said, after glancing at the monitor that was beginning to screech like a petulant two year old.

"It's cardiac tamponade. We need to drain the fluid around the heart, too," Ji Hoo said. Damn…

The term they used in the hospital was a train wreck, when everything that could possibly go wrong at once did. And that happened for Ji Hoo and the team. Ji Hoo called out instructions and moved methodically through each problem as it arose in order of importance. Ji Hoo and the team worked tirelessly on the middle aged father for nearly two hours.

Ji Hoo glanced to the monitor that was currently having a full-blown tantrum. And then suddenly it was flat-lining. No… The man's heart was longer responding to the machine. Ji Hoo placed his hands upon the man's heart and began to manually stimulate it to get the blood flowing. Come on…Come on… Ji Hoo manually pumped the heart for nearly five minutes.

"Dr. Yoon…," his sunbae said gently, "It's over. Pronounce him."

Ji Hoo exhaled and shut his eyes tightly, as he slowly released the heart. "Time of death, 1100 hours..."

Ji Hoo discarded his gloves and left the OR, suddenly feeling an incredible weight upon his shoulders. His attending followed and stood behind him as he washed up. "There was nothing you could have done," she said, "You did everything right. Sometimes that happens."

How could she say that so casually?

Ji Hoo simply sighed and continued to wash his hands, thoroughly, over and over. Ji Hoo was informed that the man was a widower but that his sister had arrived. Ji Hoo hung his head and clenched the sink tightly, digging his fingers in. He straightened his arms and then pushed back in a tug of war against the sink.

"Do you want me to tell the family?" the attending asked.

"No, I'll tell them," Ji Hoo said and walked off resolutely.

Dr. Jang, Jan Di, and the ER team had stabilized the boy, as well as the other victims of the accident. All had survived. The six year old boy had several broken ribs, a broken arm, and a concussion, but his prognosis was good. The boy had been moved from the ER to a room and was sleeping now.

Jan Di finally had a moment to breathe, and she wondered how Ji Hoo had fared in surgery. She hoped that the boy's father was OK. The boy's aunt arrived and was shown to his room. Dr. Jang entered the room and explained that her nephew was in stable condition now but would need to remain there for treatment and observation for at least a few days. The aunt nodded and thanked Dr. Jang. She sat beside her nephew, taking hold of his small hand.

Dr. Jang led Jan Di from the room. He put a hand on her shoulder. "You did a good job," he said.

Jan Di exhaled heavily, "Thank you, Seonsaengnim… I wonder how his father is…"

Just then, Jan Di saw Ji Hoo come through the double doors. He was staring straight ahead and moving determinedly through the hall. Ji Hoo approached Jan Di and Dr. Jang, who stood outside the boy's room. They looked at Ji Hoo; he said nothing but simply shook his head. Despite the façade of composure he wore, Jan Di could tell he was devastated. She touched his arm, but he moved away as if on a mission. Ji Hoo greeted the boy's aunt and introduced himself and took her aside.

Jan Di watched Ji Hoo explain that the woman's brother had died in surgery. Ji Hoo apologized sincerely, and the woman nodded, thanked him for his efforts, and hunched over crying. Jan Di watched Ji Hoo tense all over, but he remained composed. Ji Hoo put a hand on the woman's arm and apologized once more.

Jan Di watched Ji Hoo bow to the woman; she could not see his face, and she watched him turn and quickly exit through the double doors. Jan Di gazed after Ji Hoo, distressed, and then turned to Dr. Jang.

"Dr. Yoon has never lost a patient before…I imagine he needs you right now…Things are fine here right now…Go," he said and motioned with his head. Jan Di needed no further prompting, and she rushed after Ji Hoo.

Jan Di hadn't seen which way Ji Hoo had gone, but she knew where he was likely to go at such a time. "The stairwell," she said to herself aloud, and she headed that direction.

Jan Di arrived at the stairwell and stepped through the door. She glanced around but didn't see Ji Hoo. She turned, and sure enough, there he was behind her. He was seated on the ground against the back wall with his knees bent and his head buried in his arms. She hesitated, wondering if she should give him a moment, but then he looked up at her. His eyes were slightly reddened but dry. Wordlessly, she went to him and sat down. They sat there in silence for a moment.

"I'm sorry, Ji Hoo-yah…," Jan Di finally spoke, "…Are you OK?"

Ji Hoo sighed. The question did not have an easy answer, and he seemed to be pondering it very hard. When he didn't respond right away and continued to stare out ahead, Jan Di put her arm around him and rested her head against his.

Ji Hoo exhaled sharply, "That boy…he's an orphan because of me…"

"It's not your fault!" Jan Di asserted. She put a hand on his face and turned him slightly so that she could look into his eyes. He cast his eyes downward in shame and sorrow and pressed his forehead against hers. Jan Di put her arms fully around him and held his head against her chest, his tawny hair.

"I…know how you must feel," she said gently, "…but I know you did everything you could."

Much to Jan Di's surprise, Ji Hoo pulled away from her, "You don't!" it came out harsher than he'd meant. Jan Di's lips parted slightly. "You don't know how I feel…," Ji Hoo mumbled, as he gripped his knees and then buried his face in his hands.

Jan Di hung her head slightly. She knew he was thinking about the boy's plight… He's right… I don't know how it feels to lose a parent…

Seconds later, Ji Hoo sighed heavily and looked at her once more. His face was contorted with pain, but at this moment it was more regret over treating her so harshly. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry…" he muttered, taking her in his arms this time and burying her in his chest. "Forgive me, Jan Di…I'm…not myself right now," was his desperate plea.

He kissed the top of her head, and she slowly pulled back. She looked into his eyes. Tears had begun to form in his eyes now, and he was clearly fighting them. Jan Di cupped his face with both hands, as he held her arms lightly. "Listen to me," she said deliberately. He looked into her eyes.

"I know this must bring back terrible memories for you… I know you're in pain, and that kills me…and I wish I could take that away for you…but this is not your fault. It's awful, about the boy…and it's not fair…but I don't want to see you blame yourself for this. That won't do the boy any good." Ji Hoo's facial muscles tensed, and he cast his eyes downward. A few tears finally escaped their prison and fled down his cheeks. This time it was Jan Di who wiped the tears from her lover's face. She kissed his forehead, as he'd done with her so many times, and then she placed a gentle kiss on each eyelid.

"Thank you," he mumbled, looking down. She knew that she hadn't fully comforted him but that he appreciated it nonetheless. She could only imagine his pain, but she knew it was great. Not only had he never experienced the loss of a patient before, but to lose them in such a way…and for that loss to result in a child being without his only remaining parent…

"I love you," she said, not knowing what else to say, and she leaned her head against his.

"I love you, too," he mumbled back, still sounding miserable.

"But, I should have been able to do something…I couldn't save that boy's father…," he muttered after a moment. She wrapped her arms around him once more.

"Ji Hoo-yah, you can't save everyone… You are an amazing surgeon…you're the best, in my opinion. And do you want to know why I think you're the best?" she asked, as he remained in her arms, hugging her tighter. "It's not because of your skill…but it's because you care. You care so much… Ji Hoo-yah, you are the most caring, loving, wonderful man I've ever know," she whispered, as she continued to hold him there. He lifted his head and gazed into her eyes, his own a mixture of pain and gratitude. He leaned in and touched his forehead to hers and kissed her softly on the lips. The kiss was brief, but it seemed to convey the depth of his feelings for her. In his kiss she could feel everything he was feeling right now, and it broke her heart.

Suddenly, Ji Hoo sighed and stood. He took her hand to help her up. "Thank you, my otter," he squeezed her hand, "We better get back."

Ji Hoo and Jan Di walked back into the hospital hand-in-hand. Down the hall, Dr. Jang approached. They dropped hands, and Dr. Jang stood before them. Dr. Jang shoved his hands into the pockets of his lab coat. Ji Hoo did in turn. Dr. Jang tightened his mouth, "Have you gotten yourself together, Dr. Yoon?" he asked callously.

Jan Di's lips parted slightly. Ji Hoo simply stared back at Dr. Jang stone-faced.

"Dr. Yoon, I understand it's hard to lose a patient, especially your first. My first table death as a surgeon was a 7 year old girl…," Dr. Jang said. Jan Di looked down. "You don't forget about that, but you have to move on from it…"

Jan Di prepared to argue that he didn't understand, but Ji Hoo spoke first. "I know that," he said, "And I'm fine."

"Good," Dr. Jang said simply. "Because you're a good surgeon… You did everything you could, and I'd hate to see someone with as much potential as you brought down by something out of his control. It's a hard lesson to learn, but you can't save everyone, and you have to be detached enough to move on from it quickly…" And with that Dr. Jang turned from them and walked off.

Jan Di glanced to Ji Hoo. He remained expressionless. She hadn't cared for Dr. Jang's harsh tone, but she knew that in his own way he was trying to help Ji Hoo deal with this. "Are you OK?" she asked, touching his arm.

He looked down at her, gave a faint smile, and nodded. "Yea," he touched her arm, "But I have to get back. I'll see you later."

She nodded and gave him a reassuring smile. He squeezed her arm and took his leave.

Later that day, Ji Hoo sat on the boy's hospital bed and watched him for a moment. The boy's eyes remained closed, and he was breathing steadily on his own. The boy didn't know about his father yet, as he'd been unconscious since. The boy's aunt had said that she would tell her nephew, but Ji Hoo felt as though he owed the boy something. There were so many things running through Ji Hoo's head that he wanted to tell the boy but didn't quite know how. Part of him hoped the child would sleep for a while longer, for he only awoke to horrible news.

Ji Hoo was not one to slink away from something difficult, and he felt that he needed to talk to the boy. It would be on his mind until he did. Still, he knew that there was nothing he could possibly say to make it better. I understand… I've been there… No, none of it was any good… None of it would make any difference! The fact of the matter was that the boy had just lost his last remaining parent. And nothing but time could heal that wound, and it would be a scar forever. Ji Hoo had suffered for a long time, but he'd been fortunate enough to have people in his life to help with the healing process. First, there was Seo Hyun. Then, F4. And then, Jan Di.

Ji Hoo had been very quiet the last few days, and Jan Di knew he was still thinking about the accident and the young boy. The previous night he'd bolted upright in the middle of the night in a cold sweat and gasping. He'd had a nightmare. Jan Di had asked him about it, but he hadn't wanted to talk about it. She expected it had something to do with the boy or his parents. Ji Hoo had simply reassured her, and she'd put her arm around him and his hair. He'd kissed her and lay back down, and she'd hugged him tightly.

Jan Di had been checking on the boy regularly, whose name was Ha-Joon, and his health was improving for the most part. They were keeping him there for recovery. Also, he hadn't spoken since being told by his aunt about his father. He hadn't cried, and they believed he had been in shock. Jan Di had been thinking about Ha-Joon a lot, and she desperately wished she could do something for him. She knew it had been occupying Ji Hoo's mind, too. For now all she could do was ensure he continued to recover physically, visit him, and read books to him that she borrowed from Pediatrics.

Ji Hoo had visited Ha-Joon's room every day since the accident. Ji Hoo would check on him like clockwork, but he would only go into the room when the boy was sleeping and no one else was there. He would sit on his bed, as if watching over him. Once Jan Di heard Ji Hoo talking to the boy while he slept, apparently saying to him what he wanted but was unable to say while he was awake.

Though it broke her heart, Jan Di still had to smile at how caring Ji Hoo was toward the boy. He was going to be a wonderful father…

It had been 5 days since the vehicle accident and Jan Di walked with Go Mi-Nyu down the hospital hall. Dr. Jang was leaning against the nurse's station filling out paperwork.

"What's up with Seonsaengnim lately?" Mi-Nyu asked. "For a while he was almost pleasant, and now suddenly he's back to his former wonderful self…"

"I don't know, Mi-Nyu," Jan Di commented. She'd also noticed the change in Dr. Jang, and he'd been cold and distant toward her, aside from their brief exchange after the automobile accident.

Dr. Jang glanced up and met Jan Di's eyes. Oh no, he caught us staring at him…and talking about him behind his back! Jan Di and Mi-Nyu quickly looked away and pretended to be occupied by something else completely unrelated. Jan Di glanced over again cautiously after a few seconds. He was still looking at her. He met her eyes, gave no reaction, and then went back to his clipboard.

"Appa!" Jan Di and Mi-Nyu heard a child shout from down the hall. Jan Di and Mi-Nyu watched Dr. Jang turn, squat down, and hold out his arms, as a little boy about 5 years old ran to him and crashed into his arms.

Dr. Jang embraced the boy and picked him up and held him in his arms. "Shi-Woo, you're getting so big, buddy!"

"Oh, that must be Dr. Jang's son," Mi-Nyu whispered to Jan Di. "Then, that's his…" Mi-Nyu pointed to a woman approaching. She was petite and thin, with short dark brown hair worn in a bob and porcelain skin. She had large eyes, delicate features, and she wore a mini dress and heels.

"His ex-wife, I guess," Jan Di finished for her. I don't know how he could compare me to her…she's gorgeous…, Jan Di thought.

The woman stood before Dr. Jang and folded her arms. Jan Di and Mi-Nyu were curious, but they didn't want to appear to be spying, so they each grabbed a chart and began perusing their charts while they listened in. "I don't think we should be listening in," Jan Di whispered from behind the chart.

"Just another minute, Jan Di," Mi-Nyu whispered back.

"Hello, Gyeong," the woman said mechanically, folding her arms.

"Hello, Mi-Kyung. You look well," was Dr. Jang's formal response.

"As do you," she replied, equally formal. It seemed merely a pleasantry.

"What are you doing here, Mi-Kyung? I'm working. I thought I was picking him up tonight," Dr. Jang said.

Jan Di and Mi-Nyu watched Dr. Jang put his son down and go back and forth with his ex-wife about some misunderstanding regarding the arrangements for their son, while their son stood nearby.

"Mi-Nyu, we shouldn't eavesdrop any longer," Jan Di whispered again and grabbed Mi-Nyu by the arm.

Mi-Nyu began to protest, but Jan Di pulled her away. "Let's go, Mi-Nyu."

Jan Di returned to the nurse's station after she checked on several patients. She put in an order for some tests to be done. She looked up and noticed that Dr. Jang was walking toward her hand-in-hand with his son.

He approached her and she turned, hugging a chart tightly to her chest.

"Jan Di, I'm swamped, but I need to take my son to the daycare center. Could you check on Mr. Go for me?"

"I can take your son to the daycare center, Seonsaengnim," Jan Di chimed in, "So, this is him?" Jan Di knelt down before the boy. He looked at her shyly, squeezing his father's hand.

"Yes, this is Shi-Woo," Dr. Jang said.

"Hello, Shi-Woo, it's nice to meet you. I'm Jan Di." The boy cast his eyes downward. Jan Di pulled a set of stickers out of the pocket of her coat. "Would you like a sticker? Who do you like, Mickey Mouse, Pukka, Robocar Poli?" Shi-Woo smiled and pointed to one of her stickers. Dr. Jang smiled down at her, as she pulled off the sticker. "Where do you want it?" Shi-Woo pointed to his shirt, and Jan Di stuck it on for him. Shi-Woo smiled and looked down at the sticker, touching it.

"Kamsahamnida," Shi-Woo smiled shyly at Jan Di and gave her a quick bow. Jan Di ruffled his hair, "You're welcome," she stood.

Dr. Jang nodded and then squatted down next to his son. "Shi-Woo, is it OK if your new friend Jan Di takes you to the daycare center?" Shi-Woo looked at his father and then at Jan Di and nodded slowly.

Dr. Jang smiled. "OK, thank you, Jan Di."

Jan Di took Shi-Woo by the hand, and he curled his tiny fingers around hers. "Let's go, Shi-Woo. I'll introduce you to some friends of mine." They walked toward the Pediatrics ward where the daycare center was located.

It was toward the end of Jan Di's shift, and she and Dr. Jang were in a patient's room. Jan Di felt a sharp cramp, and she grimaced. Then she felt another cramp and released a quiet "ouch" and placed a hand upon her stomach. Dr. Jang looked over.

"Are you OK?" his brow wrinkled slightly.

"Yes," Jan Di nodded, and then a larger one came. Jan Di hunched over and clutched her abdomen.

Dr. Jang rushed to her and put his arm around her. "Are you OK?" he asked more insistently, running his hand lightly up and down her arm.

Jan Di didn't respond, and her brow furrowed. She closed her eyes tightly, fighting back another spasm. She opened her eyes once more and nodded to indicate she was OK. "Just been having some cramps the last couple days," she exhaled.

"Where's Dr. Yoon?" Dr. Jang asked.

"He's in surgery. Don't worry. I'll be OK. I'll just go to the bathroom…I'll be back," Jan Di wandered out of the room. Dr. Jang looked after her for a moment and then quickly followed.

Ji Hoo finished in surgery. He discarded his gloves and gown and washed his hands thoroughly. After finishing he checked his phone. There was a message from Grandfather. He dialed as he walked to his office. Grandfather picked up, sounding very solemn. "Are you heading home soon, Ji Hoo-yah?" Grandfather asked wearily.

"Yes, soon. I was just finishing up. What's wrong?" Ji Hoo could hear the emergency bell, and his mind shot to worst-case scenarios. "Is Jan Di alright?"

"Yes, she's fine, but could you come home as soon as possible?"

Ji Hoo had the sinking feeling that something was terribly wrong, despite what little information Grandfather was giving him.

"Grandfather, what is it?"

"Just come home as soon as you can," Grandfather said, "Safely, don't rush," he added.

"Yes, I'm leaving now." Ji Hoo hung up with Grandfather and immediately left the hospital, neglecting the paperwork he was going to finish before going home. So many thoughts were flooding Ji Hoo's mind, and he was completely distracted. Grandfather had told him to be safe, and of course, he needed to do that. But he honestly didn't know how he made it home in such a state.

Ji Hoo arrived home and walked in. He was first greeted by Fluffy, who was whimpering. Normally he would pat Fluffy on the head, but Ji Hoo was too distracted and ignored him entirely. Ji Hoo walked into the living room. Jan Di was sitting on the couch staring down at her hands in her lap. Grandfather sat next to her, resting his withered hand over her smooth one.

Grandfather looked up when Ji Hoo arrived, but Jan Di didn't seem to register his presence. Ji Hoo approached her. "Jan Di-yah, what's wrong?" he asked, masking his desperation for answers as best he could. When she didn't answer he closed the remaining distance and knelt before her. He looked into her eyes, which were currently dark pools of emptiness. Ji Hoo exchanged places with Grandfather, his hand now resting upon hers. With his other, he cupped her cheek. She flinched and blinked as if only now realizing he was before her.

"Ji Hoo-yah…," she looked at him helplessly.

"Are you OK?" he asked, holding her hands and squeezing lightly, "What's wrong?" He desperately wished someone would say something!

Jan Di was finally able to speak, "Ji Hoo-yah, I…I…lost the baby."

Ji Hoo closed his eyes tightly and dropped his head to her lap. He squeezed her hands and looked up at her. He could see the anguish behind her eyes, and his own agony mirrored that. As if she'd been waiting for him, her emotions came out in a tidal wave. She began to shake, lightly at first and then more violently. She put a hand to her face, and her tears rained down in a torrent.

"Oh, Jan Di-yah," he said gently and sat beside her. He pulled her in, and she crumpled into his arms, clutching at his shirt and weeping miserably. He wrapped her up securely in a blanket of his love and kissed the top of her head, feeling a few tears run down his own cheeks. He began to wipe her tears, but they were coming too steadily.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart...I'm so sorry…." Ji Hoo had sworn to always protect Jan Di from harm and pain, but he couldn't protect her from this, and it was almost too much to bear. All he could do was to hold her there and let her cry as long as she needed.

A/N: I'm so, so sorry guys! I hated to do this, but miscarriage is an issue that a lot of couples face and that I have a personal connection to. I wanted to explore how Jan Di and Ji Hoo will deal with it together. But don't give up hope for them having a family! Don't hate me...