Author’s POV

            Byul shot up from her seat when she saw Wheein walking down the steps and strode her way to Hyajin’s waiting opened arms. Wheein’s face was so wet with tears and she hid it in between Hyejin’s nape. Letting out a big fat sigh, Byul walked to the medium sized stage where a wooden podium was placed. In her left hand, was a few sheets of heavily wrinkled paper, maybe because of her tight hold for the past few hours.

            As she stood behind the wooden podium, Byul then set the sheets of paper down on the stand and ran her hands over it times and times again, trying to smoothened the heavy wrinkles. She stopped when one of the guest sitting in the front row cleared his throat almost too loudly while glancing at his wrist watch with eyebrows tightly furrowed, clearly annoyed at Byul for taking too much time. Clenching her fist, Byul then started the speech that she had prepared since the night before.

            “I’m not going to stand here and talk about things that you already know. Which mean, I’m not going to talk about how beautiful she is and neither will I talk about how kind she is. Because admit it or not, Jung Haneul … she really owned the look and the heart of an angel,” taking a pause, Byul shot a small knowing smile to the guests who were looking at her questioningly.

            “Now, you might be asking for the reason why I am standing here, if I’m not talking about anything above. To be real honest, the reason why I’m standing here is because I wanted to brag. No, I’m not going to brag about how much I love this girl called Jung Haneul. Because deep in my heart, I always know, however much love I had for her, I still can’t beat the love she had for me. What I wanted to brag about is how great her love was and how it changed me,”

            Taking another deep breath, Byul then continued, “Love, I used to hate this four letter word with all of my heart, especially after my parents death. At that time, I thought that love bring nothing but pain. If only I don’t love my parents that much, then maybe their death won’t hurt as much. So, I swore to myself that I’d avoid love as much as I could and I won’t love as much as I should,” tears are now b in her eyes as she tried her hardest to stop it from falling and stain her smooth cheek. She was clenching her fist so tightly that her knuckles turned white and she can feel the slight prick on her palm because of her nails.

            “But then, Haneul happened. The moment I realized that I fell for the woman called Jung Haneul, it was the scariest moment of my life. So, I did what I do the best, I avoided her. Until one day, it became too unbearable, for me and also for her. We had a quiet talk that day and the only question she asked me was ‘why’. Then I told her, because I’m scared. I’m scared that the love I had, would hurt both me and her. Do you know what she did after?” a big lump formed in when the memories of that night appeared at the back of her mind. Byul ran her fingers in her hair and drew out a shaky breath.

            “She smiled, she laughed even.  And when I was getting so annoyed because I thought that she was making a fool out of me, she stopped. She stopped and patted my head. That night, was the very first night that I decided to let myself go, and it was all because of her. I can still clearly remember the words that she told me that night. She told me that, it is okay to hurt when you love. Because love is not only about walking on the flowery road, but it is also about stepping on a rocky path together, yet we still chose to be there for each other. Love may hurt us in millions way, but we’d still find that one small reason to stay, because in the end … love will give us countless reasons to smile.

            After my parent’s death, I was trapped in regret. I always thought that I’ve never told them ‘I love you’ enough. This regret soon became a lingering shadow in mine and Haneul’s relationship. I always told her ‘I love you’, like seriously, I’ll tell her those three words in any chance that I got. I thought saying it was enough, so I never took my time off to simply put my words into action. And that was when Haneul taught me another important lesson of my life. Haneul told me that love is not only about the words you said, but it is also about the actions you showed. It can be when you try to figure each other’s likes and dislikes or when you try to replace the latter’s tears with laughter. Love can be shown in so many ways, don’t limit yourself and just let the magic do it wonders,” Byul cleared for another few times when the lump in won’t go away. She let her gaze ran wild before it was locked with Yongsun’s. Tearing her gaze away from Yongsun, Byul then recite the last paragraph of her speech.

            “Now that I stood here, I then realized the most crucial things about our relationships. Haneul was always the one who gives more and like a fool, I always took things for granted.

            Haneul-ah, if only … if only I realize this sooner, then maybe I’ll treat you slightly better.  All those meaningless sorry, I hope I can replace it with my sincerest apology. I’m sorry for all those times that you stood in the rain, as I made you cry the tears of pain. Haneul-ah, I don’t know if you’re here, somewhere, listening, but I just wanted to tell you that … if I can beg the God to turn back the time, then I’ll surely do it with no shame in mind. You might be laughing at me now, because we both know how impossible that is … so, I’ll just promise to love you for as long as I live.  Thank you for being the beautiful sky who was always there for the lonely moon. I love you, my one and only sky, Jung Haneul,” and with that, Byul ended her speech. A drop of tear then weakly fell from her left eyes, which she soon wiped it away with the pad of her thumb. Bowing for one last time, Byul then walked down the stage and went to Yongsun.

            “Let’s go home,” she said before striding towards the exit, leaving the shocked Yongsun behind.

            Yongsun stared at Byul’s back as she silently walked behind her. Byul’s shoulder was tight and stiff, while her back was hunched, as if she was carrying a huge burden with her. Not to mention that Byul has been keeping her silence since the drive back home. Gone was the teasing glint in her eyes that Yongsun saw for the first times few days ago and gone was the fear that remained in her eyes. All that she can see in Byul’s eyes as of now was either a huge shadow of uncertainties or the lingering regret. But what scares her most was when those pair of expressive eyes suddenly turned lifeless and void of emotions.

            “Byul-ah,” Yongsun called that name for the first time that day. She didn’t know why, but she just had the sudden urge to call that name. Truthfully, she didn’t have any words of comfort that she can offer, heck she didn’t even have anything to say at all. Her mind was as blank as a canvas, but she just have the urge to call for that name, maybe that was her way to tell the other girl that she is not alone.

            Byul halted her steps and stayed still for a few moments. She clenched her fist and turned around before saying that one sentence that sent Yongsun into a complete panic mode.

            “Can we talk?” she asked. It was such an easy question, isn’t it? You can just answer with either ‘yes’ or ‘no’. But for Yongsun, it was never as simple as that. ‘Can we talk’, Yongsun have so many bad memories for this one simple question. Her aunt asked her the same question before she was sent to the orphanage and she was also asked the very same question before she was fired from her first job.

            “Can we?” Byul pressed when Yongsun didn’t answer her the first time. Yonsun barely nod when Byul made a hand gesture for Yongsun to follow her. They went and sat side by side at the wooden bench that was under the porch.

            “Thank you,” Byul said. Yongsun in a mouthful of air, thinking that this is her ending.

            ‘This is it; she’s going to kick me out now.’

            That was the only thing that swam in Yongsun’s mind. This was why she is so shocked when she heard what Byul said next.

            “Wh … What?” Yongsun asked shockingly. Byul smiled and lightly pinched on her left cheek.

            “I said … stay. here. with. me,” byul said and intentionally pressed on the last four words harder. Yongsun’s eyes went as wide as saucer. Of all things that she had expected, this is certainly not one of them. She had expected Byul to say that she is no longer needed, heck she had even expected for herself to be kicked out of the mansion.

Therefore, when Byul had requested her to stay, she had nothing to say other than, “Wh …Why? Why do you want me to stay?”

Byul turned her head and stared right ahead. She then leant her back on the backrest of the bench while crossing both of her arms in front of her chest. Her eyes dropped a little, making her facial expression to look more serene that it already is.

“Because I’m scared of another lost,” she simply said. Yongsun was rendered speechless by Byul’s simple words. It may be because of how lonely Byul looked at that time. But Yongsun knew better, it was not the reason. She was shocked at how sincere Byul sounded and how the very same emotions was displaying in her eyes.

“What do you mean?” Yongsun asked. Byul uncrossed her arms and slightly shifted her position so that she can stare right into Yongsun’s entrancing orbs.

“You came into my life, right when I least expecting. But you came, and since then everything changed. I started hoping for you to be the sun that Wheein always told me about.  The sun who saved the moon from its own darkness. Did you know that I can always hear your laughter from the third floor?” now, if what Byul said earlier failed to catch Yongsun off guard, the last sentence certainly did.

“Huh?” Byul chuckled dryly and nodded.

“I did, I heard you laugh. As time passed, I soon got addicted to your laughter. And as more time passed, I then wanted to see the face behind the beautiful laughter. But I was scared, I’m feeling like I’m getting greedy and if I kept being greedy, then maybe I’m going to have to face another lost. That day when I finally saw you, it was the day that I finally knew; I can no longer stop this greedy side of mine. I asked you to stay the too, remember?”

“So … your point is?”

“Nothing,” Byul replied causing Yongsun to furrow her eyebrows deeper, making the creases on her forehead more obvious. also turned upside down, forming a cute frown, at least in Byul’s eyes.

 “Just kidding,” Byul said. This earned her a hard slap on her shoulder, making her yelped in pain.

“How can you play a prank on me, Moon Byul E. Especially now, when I’m so into this serious conversation,” Yongsun whined while hitting Byul’s shoulder repeatedly. She stopped when Byul grabbed her hand and unexpectedly pecked her knuckles.

“I never knew that we’re having serious conversation,” Byu; said teasingly.

“Yah! Moon Byul E!” Byul sighed shakily before her eyes turned serious.

“What I’m really trying to say is that … I like you, but I know I’m not falling for you. I also love you but I’m still not in love with you, yet. And lastly, I want to brand you as mine, but I swear I won’t do it if you don’t have the same thought in mind. I don’t know when everything started, but I just woke up one day and started to have all these sort of feelings for you, who saved me from myself,” Byul said almost too casually. The creases on Yongsun’s forehead became more and more prominent with every sentence that Byul uttered.

“This is so damn confusing! Can you just go straight to the point? In case you don’t know, my nickname was ‘yeba’, which mean pretty fool. So please stop talking like an intelligent people do, because I’m definitely not. one. of. them!” Yongsun literally shouted the last few words, causing Byul to flinch in surprise severy single time.

“I can’t see my future, but … if you’re not there in my future, then I don’t want any future. So my point is that, can you stay and be my future? Because I know, my future will be full of darkness, if you’re not there by my side,” this may sound like one heck of a confession for anyone else, but it is not for Yongsun. She has been through with what Byul is going through. She knew it was never a confession; it was just a desperate plea from a lonely soul.

“No,” Yongsun answered coldly, shocking Byul. Byul had always knew that the other girl definitely have something for her, so she had expected the girl to stay when she told her to. Hearing Yongsun saying ‘no’ so coldly, was like a hard slap of reality on her face.

“Why?”

            “You don’t want me to be your future; you just want me to be there until you found your future,”

            “What do you mean?” Byul asked. Yongsun smiled and tightened her hold on the younger girl’s hand.

            “You’re scared that you’ll fall into the darkness once again, if I ever walked out of your life. You just want me to be there, because now that you’ve seen the light, you got scared of the darkness,”

            “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Yongsun-ah,” Byul said. Her voice was so thick of uncertainties. She may appear calm on the outside, but in the inside, she is actually so frustrated that she just wanted to erase the freaking smile tugging on the corner of Yongsun’s lips.

            “Let’s just make this simple. You said you like me? No, you just like the idea of me being here, because it made you feel less lonely. Then you said you love me? You don’t love me too; you just love the idea of loving me. Why? Because as you said, I saved you from your own darkness,” Yongsun said which frustrates Byul more. She tugged her hand away from Yongsun’s hold and stood up. She looked down, towards the sitting Yongsun. Her gaze was hard and the vein on her neck was popping, proving how much frustration she was putting up, for the sake of not harming Yongsun.

            “Firstly, it’s my feelings. So I know what I felt, not you. When I said I like you, it can only means I like you, not the other way around. And when I said I love you, it also can only mean I LOVE you. I can feel any sort of emotion for you, but only I can determine why! Stop reasoning everything for me!” Byul yelled out her frustration.

            “You can’t tell me you love me, not after you swore to love someone else for as long as you live. And not to mention that you did it right in front of my face,” Yongsun said, slightly getting angry. She is now also standing up.

            “I can, because Haneul is now just a fragment of my past. She is my past, but I want you to be my future!” Byul argued.

            “And you can’t say someone is just a fragment of your past, if you love her enough to even swear to love her for the rest of your life!”

            “I can, because the moment I told you that I love you, it is also the moment when I finally let go of Haneul. She’ll now remain as my past, but I swear I’ll make you my future. Plus, I said I’ll love her for the rest of my life, but I never said to love ONLY her. I admit that she’ll always have this tiny little spot in my heart, but the rest … it is yours. It is yours to care and it is yours to keep. It is also yours to hurt,” Byul uttered. Her tone is now softer than before.

            “I’m a selfish kind of woman. If I love someone, I want to be the only one in the person’s heart,”

            “If so, then I believe you’ll be single for the rest of your life. Because whether you admit it or not, everyone has a special spot for someone in their life, including you,” Byul was still staring hard at Yongsun when she heard Wheein’s timid voice calling her from behind.

            “Are you deliberately putting a jinx on me?” Byul smirked and silently mouthed ‘maybe’.

            “Now that you’re here, can you please bring these two people out of my house? I don’t think I need any of them anymore. I can save myself from my own darkness, and that is what I’m going to do,” Byul said without tearing her gaze away from Yongsun.

            “Maybe the moon never really need the sun to save it from its own darkness, and maybe it just need a dark sky to let it shine,” she whispered to Yongsun before walking out of the scene.

            “Why did you play the same song every single night?” Yongsun asked before Byul walked further away. Byul halted her steps, but this time, she never turned around.

            “Because I wanted to be saved from myself then,” she replied. She then walked away, never stopping, even when Yongsun told her to..

Yeah! I finally made a comeback. So, I wrote this while I’m down with fever. Therefore please forgive me for any mistakes I made. Thank you. And as usual, please don’t forget to leave comment, subscribe and upvotes. Thank you.

a/n. : What do you think about Yongsun rejecting Byul here? Do you think that Yongsun’s reason is reasonable?

p.s : Have you watched mamamoo’s Lie V? The moonsun and wheesa’s moment there is no joke I tell you ! LOL