sorry to make you all wait so long...it's been over a month since I updated last...I feel so bad.. minhae >.< and this update also isn't a very long one

Again I can only apologize to you...

I hope at least you enjoy reading this chapter...although I don't really feel like it's good...

“Wait...”

Kyuhyun, his hand already on the door knob, immediately froze. Just this one little word from her made his heart skip a beat. He felt all tensed up. Just a few seconds ago he confessed to her...so could it be that she'll answer him right away?

“She didn't tell me to leave yet so there's still a chance that she could like me back right? I mean...we sometimes fight but...it's not that we don't make up again. And I never really had the feeling that she would really hate me....but...what if I just never noticed? What if she dislikes me but I just denied it?”

He slowly turned around and all at once he felt his fears confirmed and the little hope he had shattered into million pieces. Although he couldn't see her face, because Sooyoung was holding up his jacket in front of her, he already knew what she was going to say.

“Kyuhyun-shi...don't forget your jacket if you want to leave...”

“Uh...yeah...sorry...”

Slowly he walked to her, his legs felt like they were made of lead and his whole body and even his mind felt numb. His whole body...excepts for his heart. It was as if someone ripped his heart out and tore it into many pieces. Well, not just someone, but her, Choi Sooyoung, the girl whom he thought she was far from his ideal type as the sun from the earth. And yet he found himself falling more and more for her the longer he was by her side. Finally he understood why all those girls always started crying when he turned them down. Actually he felt like crying too, but instead he held back the tears to spare her from such a pathetic sight. When he took the last step and stood next to her, Kyuhyun cleared his throat to say goodbye, even if he doubted that she would ever want to see him again.

“Well...thanks. It would be bad if I forgot it here...this would mean I'd had to come back again, right?”, he asked while grabbing his jacket. “Uhm...Sooyoung...you have to let go of the jacket, you know?”

Sooyoung blinked a few times before she looked up to him. Her eyes wandered back to her hands and she blushed when she realized what she was doing.

“You don't want him to leave, right?”

Her eyes grew wider and she looked around when she suddenly heard this familiar voice.

“Oppa?”

“Ne.”, the male voice appeared next to her. “Did you miss me?”

“Siwon-oppa...why are you here? I thought you were...”

“Shh...” He put a finger on her lips to quiet her down and smiled at her. “It doesn't matter why I'm here...the only important thing is that you like him, right?”

“Ah...I...I just don't know...”

Siwon sad down next to her on the bed and patted her head.

“Hm...then...he said he likes you, right? He said he likes being with you, didn't he?”

Sooyoung looked down on her hands, playing with a streak of her hair. She pouted a little when looking at her oppa again.

“He didn't say that he likes me...he just likes being around me...there's a difference, you know...”, she muttered.

The young man smiled at her and poked her puffy cheeks.

“Aigoo...my baby worries that a guy might not like her”, he grinned and pinched her cheeks before he smiling gently at her. “Don't worry baby. Do you remember back in middle school? You were the most popular girl even though you were a first year.”

“mmh...but..”

“No but, Youngie! You've always been so popular and you know why?” Siwon looked at Sooyoung, who was shaking her head. “Because you're so adorable. You're friendly and nice, always caring and worrying more for others than for yourself, you're cute and dorky, it's always fun being around you. You have so many good qualities that it would take more than a day just to name one little part of them and still you worry that someone, who said that he likes being around you, could not like you? I mean please...even I had a crush on you. How could he not have fallen for you?”

Sooyoung blushed when she heard the last part of his 'speech'. She had already forgotten about that incident and now that he mentioned it the memories came back to her.

“Oppa...mianhae...”

Siwon frowned a little.

“Why...are you apologizing?”

“Because...oppa...I knew that you like me..but still I kept avoiding you. Because of me you only had bad memories about your first love...”

“It's ok, baby”, he smiled. “I didn't have only bad memories. Actually I was very happy with you...I knew that you didn't like me the way I liked you...I can't blame you for it...cause...we grew up like siblings so of course you would only see me as your brother...And..”, he blushed a little. “I shouldn't have rushed you like that...”

“Oppa...don't say it as if it was your fault...I..should have told you the truth but instead I didn't say anything...and because of that you had to endure so much. You always smiled at me although I hurt you so much. Because oppa was such a nice person I didn't want to let you go. Because I was scared of being alone I kept you by my side and caused you and also Seohyun so much pain. Because I'm such a bad person....”

“No, you're not.” Siwon put his hands around her cheeks and made the brunette girl look at him. “You're not a bad person, ok? Everyone is scared of being alone. And...I decided it on my own. To stay by your side although I knew it...I could have looked for another girl...but I didn't want to, because you were the one I like. I thought that maybe someday you would like me back when I just waited long enough...who knew that...I wouldn't get this chance...”

For a moment they both kept silent and let their gazes wander through the room. They both were thinking about what had been, about the accident and what could have happened if it would change anything if on that rainy day they hadn't decided to meet each other. Siwon was the first one to break the silence by clearing his throat. Sooyoung looked at him and saw the gentle smile she loved...no she liked so much. Because after all, she knew that she always just liked him. She loved him as her brother, but only liked him as a guy.

“Well...maybe everything would be different if things went different...but...even if I was still by your side...sooner or later you would have found someone else. I think I always knew that your feelings weren't the same and would never be the same with mine...but I just denied it. I think I was a little pathetic.” He laughed a little and caressed her cheek. “But now...I think I can give up now. Because I can see that you found the one who moved your heart. You like him the way I always wanted you to like me. But now I don't want this anymore. Sooyoungie...right now I just want you to be happy with him, ok? Today, tomorrow and forever...I want you to lead a happy life. I can't be by your side anymore, but I trust him to be able to make you happy.” Gently, he wiped away the tears that were rolling down her cheeks. He felt his own eyes becoming teary but he just held them back and gave her his brightest smile. “After all you chose him over oppa, so he must be a really good guy.”

Again he laughed a little before he wrapped his arms around her. Siwon closed his eyes for a moment and breathed in the scent of her hair, feeling the warmth coming from her body, feeling her soft skin, hearing her steady heart beat. He hugged her a little longer just to imprint the feeling of being with her before he finally loosened the hug. He then stood up and smiled one last time at her.

“Sooyoung, my little crybaby, my cheerful princess, my shikshin, my cute and adorable sister...my one and only love, please don't ever forget about oppa, okay?”

Sooyoung, the tears still flowing down her cheeks, shook her head.

“I'll never forget you, oppa. How could I? You were the most important person in my life...”

Siwon bent down a little and patted her head.

“Then it's good. And don't forget my wish for you, ok?...I want you to smile. Just live your life to the extent so that you won't have to regret anything...I...want you to be happy, arasseo?”

Sooyoung looked into the face she loved so much. Because of the tears her sight was blurred, but she still knew that he was giving her his best smile, a gentle and caring smile, the smile he only gave her. Because she knew that if she just said one word, she would start crying and sobbing like a little baby, Sooyoung just nodded and smiled at him.

“Good girl. I think I don't have to worry over you anymore. You're stronger now. And you have someone by your side who can protect you even better than me...So please don't get in your own way and just tell him about your true feelings, ok?”

With these last words he slowly faded away and Sooyoung was back there on the bed in the hospital room, looking at the back of Kyuhyun who was about to leave the room.

“Oppa! Saranghae!”

“And this applies also to you, Siwon-oppa. You will always be my beloved brother. I only had good memories with you..so don't worry. I'll try my best to fulfill your wish! So don't worry anymore and just rest in piece. From now on I will take care of my own happiness!”

“I will but this means I can't be by your side anymore. When you feel lonely...just remember that I'm always in your heart and your memory, ok? Don't forget about me....Hm...My little baby grew up...I'm so proud of you. And...I love you too.”

Well...this was the chapter...it's really confusing right? Just to make it clear...that conversation between Siwon and Sooyoung didn't happen in reality, that's why I wrote it in italics. I all only happened in Sooyoung's imagination. But did you guys ever experienced something like that? Imagining to talk to someone? If not...it's also fine

Anyways...In the next few chapters I'm going to clear the whole situation and the relationship between Sooyoung, Siwon and Seohyun. So please stay tuned :3

Thank you all for waiting so long and still reading my story. Next time I'll try harder to give you a faster and even better update! :3