Ding dong

SinB stood on the front porch of Yerin’s house. Small gift bag in hand, she began to fiddle with its ribbon handle as she waited for her best friend to answer the door.

Yesterday was another day filled with unanticipated events. First, there was Sowon who magically transformed into a goddess in the short span of a summer break. Then, there was Umji who SinB was certain didn’t pose a threat. But, after her neighbor’s last remark regarding the upcoming full moon, SinB wasn’t so sure if Umji was as bumbling as she seemed. Even during their walk home together that afternoon, the young girl failed to display any context clues, indicating that she really knew about SinB’s other half.

Despite her next door neighbor potentially knowing about her secret werewolf identity, SinB was more concerned about her unsteady friendship with Yerin. From the first day of school, SinB could already sense they were growing apart. And, as much as she didn’t want to admit it, Yuju wasn’t the only factor to blame.

After much debate, SinB waited for Yerin at her locker to confirm that she was free to stop by and hang out for a while. Visibly ecstatic, the older girl gave her an estimate of the time she’ll be home after track practice. And, so, everything was set.

As she continued to wait anxiously, SinB checked her phone to see if the small alarm clock icon still glowed. In case she happened to lose track of time, SinB made sure to set an alarm, alerting her of sundown and giving her enough time to leave Yerin’s house before the inevitable change happens. Quickly placing her phone back into her pocket, SinB stood at attention when she heard the older girl’s feet prancing closer to the entrance.

The door opened and SinB was greeted by Yerin’s perky smile.  

“Hey! SinB-ah! Come inside,” Yerin enthusiastically welcomed, allowing entry for SinB to fully step into the house. “Sorry to keep you waiting. I took a quick shower and was blow drying my hair when you rang the bell.”

“It’s fine,” SinB replied. “Nice pajamas.” She noted Yerin’s black and red, Mickey Mouse sweatpants and semi-baggy t-shirt.

“Thanks. I got them on a good deal at that one store in the marketplace.”

“As expected from Jung Yerin, bargain expert,” SinB mused. Looking around, she noticed some small alterations to the living room’s decor, but nothing too drastic. “Are your parents home?”

“No, they’ve both changed their work schedules. My Appa took on a new construction job a couple of weeks ago, and my Umma is now working the three to eleven shift at the hospital.”

“Well, that’s good for them,” SinB said with a compassionate smile.

Yerin nodded while placing a damp lock of hair behind her ear. “How are your parents doing?” she spoke carefully.

It wasn’t much of a surprise for SinB to learn that the news of her parents’ divorce became the talk of the town. Her mom and dad were high school sweethearts who doted on each other at every chance given. They became even more enviable when SinB came into the picture and people began to place them on the pedestal of perfection. But, like all good things, their relationship began to crumble, and SinB was stuck in the middle of it all.

Sighing, SinB managed to form a repressed, tight-lipped smile. “The usual never ending arguments filled with dramatic door slammings and talks of how one is going to get custody over me.” She breathed out another sigh of despair.

Yerin frowned sympathetically. “So, same old, same old?” she said, tone lighthearted.

“Pretty much,” SinB answered frankly, demeanor quickly changing from pitiable to nonchalant.

The two exchanged a round of laughter as if they were sharing an inside joke. Ever since Junior High, SinB could recount the moments when her parents’ marriage started to deteriorate right before her eyes. She knew that Yerin could foresee it, too. The older girl would often times invite SinB over to her house for slumber parties and study sessions. But, SinB knew there was an ulterior motive in Yerin’s generosity. She wanted to help SinB recuperate from the tense, unstable environment that was once her happy home. And, for that, SinB became even more grateful of her dear friend.

Yerin glanced at the gift bag twirled around SinB’s wrist. “What’s the bag for?” she asked.

“I finished unpacking yesterday and stumbled upon a souvenir I forgot to give to you.” SinB held out the relatively small, yellow bag for Yerin.

“Ooo,” Yerin smiled brightly, looking into the bag filled with baby blue tissue paper to conceal the present. “Let’s unwrap it in my room,” she said, grabbing onto SinB’s hand before dragging her to the bedroom at the end of the hallway.

Once inside, Yerin casually plopped onto her bed. Sitting with her legs crossed like a pretzel, she excitedly removed the the bundle of decorative tissue. SinB sat on the edge of the bed next to her, a bit apprehensive over whether or not her best friend would actually like the gift.

Extracting the last piece of tissue, Yerin reached her hand into the bag and retrieved the bulky item, pulling the mystery present out. Though still smiling, her eyebrows knitted with confusion as she looked to her best friend for some enlightenment.

Giggling nervously, SinB looked down at the worn-out rug that had the printed pattern of rubber ducks. “I took a ceramics class as my elective and one of our projects was to make a coffee mug. The teacher said we could design it however we like, and I wanted to draw something that represents us and our friendship. So, I drew No Face to symbolize me and my love for Spirited Away. And, I drew Jibang to symbolize you because I know how much you love that plush toy.” Quickly glancing at Yerin, SinB began to nervously rub her neck after seeing her friend’s neutral expression. “Sorry for my terrible drawing skills. I’m not exactly a Picasso when it comes to using a paperclip on clay.” She glanced at her, again. The girl’s face was still too blank to decipher a specific emotion. “Yerin-ah?”

During SinB’s explanation, Yerin stared at the sub-par drawings of their two favorite characters. She traced the lines and felt the indentations of the mug’s flaws. The handle was rough while the rest of the cup was perfectly lacquered with a deep blue glaze. She found herself getting lost in the item that was practically the embodiment of their friendship until SinB called her out from her trance.

As she turned her head to look at the younger girl, a wondrous eye smile rose on Yerin’s face. “It’s perfect,” she uttered, at last. “Gomawo, SinB-ah.”

“You better not be playing around, Yerin-ah, because it took a lot of hard work and many failed attempts to even get it to how it is now,” SinB feverishly spoke.

Yerin placed an arm around SinB’s shoulders, subduing her. “SinB-ah, I’m not joking. I love it, honestly. It’s the most thoughtful present anyone has given me.”

The older girl brought her face closer to SinB, showing off her eye smile to prove that she wasn’t lying. SinB was instantly caught in a daze, overwhelmed by Yerin’s freshly showered, breathtaking face. And, even though she cleaned up for the night, SinB could easily pick up on Yerin’s unique, blissful scent. With her eradicating heartbeat, SinB hurriedly leaned away before she did anything regrettable to her best friend who was happily in a relationship… with the one person she couldn’t stand.

“Yeah, well, even though it’s a mug, I advise you not to drink out of it,” SinB blurted, trying to not think about kissing the doe-eyed like there was no tomorrow. “But, you can still use it as a  pencil holder or something.” Darting her eyes away from Yerin, SinB sporadically stood up from the bed, taking note of something on the older girl’s bedroom wall. “Is that a new SHINee poster?”

“Yeah, they had a comeback while you were away,” Yerin, slightly puzzled over her friend’s odd behavior, replied before getting up from her bed to stand next to SinB.“You didn’t hear about it? It was one of their most successful releases to date.”

“I kind of fell out of the K-pop sphere during my time in America,” SinB sheepishly admitted.

“What? Too cool for K-pop, now, SinB-ah?” Yerin jokingly jibed.

“I don’t think I’ll ever be too cool for K-pop,” SinB proclaimed. “But, my friends in California did open me up to some pretty amazing bands. Wanna listen to some of their stuff?”

Yerin looked at SinB as if she was crazy to even suggest such a thing. But, then a small smile crept on her lips followed by a slight twinkle in her eyes. “Sure. On one condition, though. After every song you play, we get to watch a live performance of SHINee as a palette cleanser for my eyes and ears.” She grinned.

SinB rolled her eyes. “Deal.”

“What’s this group called, again? Arctic Ponies?” Yerin asked.

“Arctic Monkeys,” SinB corrected defensively.

“As if that makes the name any better.”

Yerin and SinB were lying side by side on the width of the older girl’s bed. For the past two hours, they’ve been taking turns on SinB’s phone, listening to tunes and watching music show performances of the latest comebacks. Yerin would often complain about how loud and noisy the songs were while SinB would fangirl over her “Big Bang Oppas” she hasn’t kept up with since summer. It was nice to just spend some time alone together where they could goof off and be complete dorks.

As they continued to venture into the world of rock and roll, SinB’s lips twitched when she noticed the older girl’s head was bobbing to the beat.

“I like this song much better than the other ones you played before,” Yerin commented. With her Jibang plush doll she had since elementary school, Yerin placed its little feet on SinB’s stomach and made up a dance for the round, plush toy to do. “See. Even Jibang likes it.”

SinB began to chuckle from Yerin’s childlike actions. Her smile faltered, though, when the song suddenly paused and was replaced with the dings of a new text message alert. Bringing her phone up to her face, SinB’s eyes went wide when she saw the name of the sender. She read over the English-language message.

Sarah:

Hey, SinB! Just wanted to check up on you and see how you’re adjusting in Korea. Everyone misses you back at school. Hope we can see each other again :) <3

“Who’s Sarah?” Yerin asked curiously, stretching her neck to get a better view of the screen. “Is she your girlfriend from the States?” she questioned with a teasing grin.

“Sarah’s the daughter of the family I lived with during my stay,” SinB answered straightforwardly. “And, no, she’s not my girlfriend.” She shook her head.

“Do you have a picture of her?”

Knowing that Yerin would continue to peeve her until she got what she wanted, SinB turned to her side, quickly tapped in her passcode, and went into the photos app. Scanning her pictures, SinB scrolled downward until she found a selfie that she and Sarah took before her departure. With a stubborn look on her face, SinB held up the screen for Yerin to see.

The older girl swiftly snatched onto the phone, causing SinB to release it out of her grasp. Yerin’s eyes dilated at the sight of SinB’s overseas friend. She appeared to be bi-racial, but attractive, nonetheless. The girl had an arm comfortably wrapped around SinB’s shoulders who appeared to be pleased of the close proximity. Yerin couldn’t help but notice the brightness and joy of SinB’s smile in the picture. She frowned slightly when she realized that her best friend has not smiled like that at any point during her return.

“Wow. She’s so pretty,” Yerin said in a dreamlike manner. She turned her head to look at the younger girl who waited impatiently for her phone to be returned. “You have to text her back and tell her that you love her, SinB-ah.”

In disbelief, SinB sprung up to a sitting position. “Are you out of your mind, Yerin-ah?!” Her forehead crinkled with incredulity. “I can’t just write that, especially when I don’t mean it!”

Unfazed, Yerin on the inside of her cheek as she thought. “You’re right, SinB-ah. Confessing your love for her will probably look like you’re coming off too strong. We need to ease it in if you want to maintain a long-distance relationship with Sarah-ssi.” Clicking her tongue and snapping a finger, Yerin’s demeanor lit up with an epiphany. “I know the perfect thing to write.”

“Yah! Jung Yerin! What exactly are you doing?” SinB got on her knees, trying to peer at the phone’s screen. Yerin simply held the phone closer to her face as she continued to tap away.

“I’m writing up a text message for you to send to Sarah-ssi,” Yerin answered calmly.

“You’re doing what?!” SinB exclaimed, eyes bewildered. “This is crazy! Plus, Sarah doesn’t even know how to read Hangul.”

“Well, she can put it into Google translate. I’m sure she’ll understand the gist of it.”

Most of the time, SinB found Yerin’s random, eccentric behavior to be cute and endearing. Like how she would place her water bottle upside down on the table. Or, how she could make up a wacky dance on the spot. But, holding her phone hostage and writing a love letter to Sarah, the girl who SinB recognized more as sister than a crush, definitely did not qualify as one of those moments.

“Just putting the finishing touches,” Yerin announced happily.

SinB didn't understand why the older girl was so caught up in creating a love connection between her and Sarah just from a picture alone. She knew she had to put an end to it, quickly.

“Yerin-ah, stop kidding around and give me back my phone.”

“Patience, SinB-ah. I'll give it back when I press the ‘send’ button.”

Biting on her bottom lip and letting out a grunt to quell her annoyance, SinB lunged towards Yerin, hoping to snatch her phone from the older girl’s hands. But, Yerin was fast to extract her hand away, raising it further than SinB could reach. SinB hovered over Yerin, desperately trying to grab the phone containing an unwanted message she did not want Sarah to receive.

“Just let me send it, SinB-ah. It’s not as bad as you think.”

“You don’t understand, Yerin-ah,” SinB pleaded. One arm carried her weight as she continued to keep a friendly, platonic distance from Yerin. The other arm strained, reaching for her phone that was a few inches away. “I don’t love her!” She lowered herself neared to Yerin, the distance between her fingertips and the phone decreasing, but still not enough. “I don’t even have those types of feelings for her.” Casting down by another increment, she could feel the older girl’s breath tickling her neck, but she was so close to retrieving that forsaken communication device. “They’re not the same kind of feelings that I have when I’m with…” SinB stopped herself before the next word erupted from . She could feel Yerin stiffen underneath her.

Looking into friend’s eyes, she saw a shift in the older girl’s demeanor as if she realized that they weren't just having a playful exchange. Both of them were silent. Expressions were filled with surprise, confusion, and maybe even a hint of desire. Unable to carry her weight any longer, SinB’s arm buckled and gave up, causing her to land directly on top of her friend’s warm, soft body.

Tell me what to do

At the speed of light, SinB picked herself off of Yerin, plucked her phone from the older girl’s hand, and tumbled out of the bed when she heard her best friend’s ringtone start to play out of the blue.

Slightly startled, Yerin sat up from the bed and reached for her phone on her nightstand.

“It’s Yuju,” Yerin informed hesitantly.

“Go ahead. Answer the call. I'll be fine,” SinB encouraged her friend, forcing out a smile.

With a small smile of her own, Yerin slid her finger on the screen to answer the call. “Hi, Yuju-ya,” she cheerfully greeted her girlfriend. “No, I'm hanging out with SinB-ah, right now.” Covering the microphone, Yerin quietly mouthed, “I'll be right back,” before retreating out of the room and into the hallway for some privacy.

Alone, SinB pushed her disheveled hair back. Looking down at her phone, she exhaled a breath of relief when she noticed that the message remained unsent. Without reading what Yerin wrote, she hastily kept her thumb down on the backspace button until the last word was erased. Afterwards, she placed the phone back into her pocket, figuring that it was best to respond to Sarah at a later time.

As she waited for Yerin’s return, SinB decided to take a gander at the pictures adorned on the older girl’s vanity mirror. A light smile rose on SinB’s face, lifting up her cheeks when she came across a childhood photo of her and Yerin dressed as flowers for a school play. She continued to gaze at the candid shots of Yerin and her family at the beach and the Polaroid slumber party pictures taken back in Junior High. Memories of her and the older girl secretly watching scary movies resurfaced in SinB’s mind. How Yerin would clutch onto her Jibang plush as well as SinB’s arm when a monster jumped at the screen.

On the corner of the mirror, SinB came across a photo booth-taken picture of Yerin and Yuju. The column of pictures featured the pair striking four different poses. First, was a pleasantly happy pose of them smiling. The next picture had them making funny faces at the camera. After that was a picture of Yuju resting her chin on Yerin’s shoulder as they looked at each other lovingly. And, the last picture had the two of them sharing a kiss on the lips.

As jealousy struck her heart, SinB tried to turn her attention to the next image. But, she couldn't. She continued to stare at the ideal couple. How SinB wished she could confess her feelings to her best friend. How she wished she was the one to lay her chin on the older girl’s shoulder. How she wished she was the one to kiss those perfectly shaped lips.

Finally able to dart her vision away, SinB caught sight of her reflection in the mirror. Her dark brown eyes were already altering to the blood red hue of the beast she tried to keep hidden. Suddenly, the alarm she set warning her of the impending full moon went off. Clumsily, she took out her phone to turn the alarm off only to be appalled by her veiny hands and jaggedly sharp fingernails.

She had to leave immediately before the transformation reached the point of no return.

Briskly striding out of Yerin’s room, SinB pulled down the sleeves of her jacket to conceal her monstrous-looking hands. Bumping into Yerin’s shoulder, the older girl was confused to see her friend’s jittery condition.

“SinB-ah, are you okay?” Yerin asked, tone serious and concerned.

Bowing her head to hide her frightening eyes, SinB continued to slowly walk away backwards. “Yeah, I’m fine. Listen, Yerin-ah, my Umma just called me and I have to go back home, right now.” She gulped, trying to keep her voice stable. “I’ll see you tomorrow at school. Bye!”

Hand on the doorknob of the entrance, SinB jetted out of Yerin’s home without waiting for her friend to return the hasty farewell.

Though the sun was still in the midst of setting, SinB could feel the werewolf’s overpowering presence. Fishing out her earphones, she put them on and began to play a song on her phone. The grunge guitars and deep bass line was enough to temporarily tame the beast until she figured out exactly the best place to shift.

SinB knew her parents were at the house. And, even if they weren’t, she didn’t want to risk striking up the curiosity of her new neighbor. The park would have been a good choice if only the city hadn’t decided to cut down all the trees. SinB, then, thought about the school’s track field and how there was a section of large bushes off to the side that she, Yerin, and a couple other teammates would hide in during practice to take a break. Figuring that it was her best choice, she began to jog to Navillera High. The sights and sounds of the town were all a blur as SinB concentrated on getting to her destination before the sun was replaced with the mystical moon.

You’re such a fugitive

But, you don’t know what you’re running from

You can’t kid us

And you can’t trick anyone

Houdini, love, you don’t know what you’re runnin’ away from

Reaching the desolate school ground, SinB continued to run towards the back where the field was located. Expertly, she climbed over the fence, entering the place of seclusion. A place where she knew she couldn’t hurt anyone, at least physically.

SinB took refuge in the nostalgic bushes, removing her earphones with so much force that the jack was pulled out from the phone’s audio port. She didn’t think much of it, though. The sky had already transitioned into a dark, navy blue and SinB could feel the bones in her back begin their uncontrollable convulsions. Piece of clothing by piece of clothing, SinB stripped down to her most vulnerable state, being mindful of not tearing the fabric with her claws.

She got down to the ground, closed her eyes, and started to scream in pain as she felt every bone in her body stab at her organs, making room for the werewolf to take shape.

SinB hated transformations caused by the full moon. Not only were they more tortuous and unexpected, but they made her less prone of remembering events that happened during her wolf-state. In the beginning, she was able to maintain a sense of consciousness. But, as the night proceeded, SinB would usually find herself blacking out, allowing the werewolf to take control of her actions. It was scary and unpredictable, especially her first full moon transformation where she woke up the next morning in the freezer of the neighborhood’s deli, covered in the blood and juices of raw meat. Hopefully, the gated area of the school would be enough to contain her. But, SinB didn't count on it.

With her werewolf counterpart fully unleashed, SinB’s eyes snapped open. Leaping over the bushes in a single bound, she strode in the middle of the track field where the moon brightly glistened. She was panting, mouth hungrily salivating for something to eat. Free to do whatever she wanted in the empty field, SinB began to howl at moon. It sounded treacherous and mighty, yet woeful and lonely.

Overhead, though, another howl responded to her call.

Brows intensely furrowed, SinB jerked her head towards the source of the equally intimidating howl.

Standing at the very top of the many rows of bleachers was another werewolf. Its chest puffed out proudly. Fur was jet black and would have probably blended in with the shadows if it wasn't for the creature’s electric blue eyes.

The roguish looking werewolf stared at SinB from afar as a smirk appeared on its mouth. It began to run across the metal bleachers, hurdling over the railings with elegance before jumping off the side and disappearing into the night.

Song lyrics used: “Old Yellow Bricks” by Arctic Monkeys