Epilogue. "The Meeting"

The day was bright, the sun radiated and kissed the earth, leaving no place untouched. The sweet spring gust rolled from the west and simply took the smell of oak, flowers and fresh water with it. It gave the warm air a little chill that turned all of one’s senses on.

He sat there, in the same spot he once sat at. His hands buried in his black bomber jacket as he simply looked out into the river that glistened every time the wind and the sun grazed its surface. It was a wonderful day full of spring sweetness.

He took in the fresh and clean air, remembering that day vividly. His memory has been great, he had been able to recall things from before that his own mind hid away. He remembered sitting here, looking out into the river. He had a fight with his step brother and he angrily ran out, he got into a random cab and just told the drive to drive anywhere.

He ended up here only to witness a terrible rejection. Today, oddly enough, and as if it was a sign from the universe, he peered at the same spot where that girl once rejected a good guy for money. That same spot full of rejection and negativity was full of laughter and love as a guy bend to one knee and offered to spend the rest of his life to his girlfriend before him. She accepted, embracing the man before him and nothing but love could be written in their eyes.

Today was a good day, he told himself. His hands grazing over his thighs, remembering the times he just wanted to be in control of his pain and taking it out on himself. The pain was a sweet high for him once, but now, he can’t even bare to think about it without feeling like he was defeated.

The peak of noon arrived, and he sat there, waiting, observing. He loved sitting here, looking at the people before him and wondered if they are struggling like he once was. He wouldn’t be surprised if they were, after all, mental distress and disorders are hard to pin point just by looking at someone’s outward appearance.

It was hard, waking up every morning, having to put on a mask to make sure the world doesn’t see what you are struggling with, those inner thoughts that keep screaming for nothing, but darkness never disappear. Even for him, there have been some days where he just wakes up, sit at his balcony and the thought of darkness screamed loud and clear.

But it was drowned by the barking of his precious dog, the voice of Yein telling him it was time to eat breakfast, the sound of Junhong’s alarm that yelled at him to wake his lazy up. The older had insisted that a normal morning alarm was useless, so he made one of his voice. It didn’t work well to wake him up in the mornings, but it worked well to remind Jungkook every day that he has friends who love him and care for him.

He looked over at the open spot next to him, the black charcoal colored mask sitting there. A smile tugging at his lips, it was a challenge that it presented, a challenge he felt he overcame. She was right, there were days where therapy was frustrating, the medicine was too much, and he just wanted to scream. Those were the days he resented her for leaving.

When depression overtook him out of the blue and he just felt numb and empty, he hated her for not being able to take his calls and help him. He hated her, and he wanted to just forget her but Yein didn’t let him. When Jungkook felt vulnerable, he had told Yein about his meetings with the hostess and everything dealing with Jiwoo, everything he could remember, and she didn’t hate him, she didn’t say anything.

The only thing she did was dig up the mask Jungkook threw away in his closet, and simply displayed it in their living room. She told him that every time he comes home, he must look at it and remember the friend that will be back, the friend who helped him, the friend that pulled him out of the darkness when everyone was just sitting around watching him destroy his life.

Two years, a rough and never-ending process of just fighting.

The thought in his head, the single thought that screamed for life, was shouting the loudest. He started feeling a significant change. Everyday turned into a game, a game that all his friends will infringe upon him. The game was simple, think of one good thing you have this instant, one thing that makes you smile or what is one thing that can make him happy at that instant.

Yein always asked him over breakfast, he would always respond with the food she made. Junhong would ask at work, he always responded in a sarcastic jab at the other that simply made them both laugh. Moonbin would ask during lunch, and Jungkook would always respond with a complement on how amazing Moonbin was doing as a project manager. And Jin, he would always ask at the end of the day, when the battle was over, and he needed to be reminded the most about the good things in his life. Jungkook would look at him and respond with the thing that made him smile the most that day, or sometimes by just saying he has an amazing older brother that takes care of him.

Some days were easier than others. Some days where his anger was rushing in too fast to control at will, where the chemical imbalance in his brain was out of reach and the day would turn sour. But those were the days they all showed up at his house to watch a movie, they never talked about how he was feeling, they simply made him feel like he wasn’t alone, and it was their presence and constant talking that made him feel like he had someone.

“Is this seat taken?” The voice ran in his ear, the familiar sweet and bright voice that has been lost for two years was there.

He turned and saw her standing tall and proud, wearing her signature sunlight smile that just illuminated the day better than the sun. He didn’t know what to say, he wasn’t expecting her just yet, he wasn’t expecting her at all, and he was beyond unprepared.

He didn’t know why, maybe it was the thing that he hadn’t overcome just yet, but he expected her to never show up. She didn’t contact him when she came back, its been a week since she landed and the only reason why he found out she had returned was because of the club.

The Kingdom Club is still as prestigious as ever, but one of the things they do is keep their costumers updated to the return and addition of new host and hostesses. Jungkook received a voice mail message telling him that the hostess he was seeing, The Ice Princess, had come back and will begin working that weekend.

He tried not to hold a grudge on Junhong, who he was certain was the first to know when Jiwoo had returned. But due to therapy, he was able to stay patient, knowing there is a reason why Junhong didn’t say anything and why she hasn’t reached out. He kept hoping she would, but days went by and nothing happened.

It was only this morning that Junhong told him that an old friend was going to be at the river, in this particular park, and he just knew it had to be her.

“No, it’s a seat for you,” he spoke, his words dry as he was still not entirely sure how he was supposed to handle this conversation.

It is odd, talking casually with someone he hasn’t seen in two years. He wanted to jump up, hug her and simply ask he so many questions about where she was, and what she was doing, and if she was finally going to stay. But the moment she smiled and took the mask off the seat, his mind went blank.  

“Sorry it took a week to meet up. I am finally done with my practice, so I had a lot of job interviews this week, I’ve just been trying to settle down. I didn’t want to meet with you all stressed and worried about my life,” she spoke, her words soft and bright.

She looked at him, her eyes creasing due to her smile as she simply chuckled in an apologetic manner. She had a mint green backpack with her, complementing her light peach colored blouse and torn jeans that hugged her legs. She was casual, she looked like she was there to stay for a while and he hoped he was right.

“Have you settled? Where are you working? Do you need me to write a letter of recommendation? What about a place to stay? We can find you a good and cheap place? And about-”

“Yah!” She screamed, a laugh trailing behind her interruption as Jungkook simple chuckled, not realizing he was just firing nothing but questions.

“I found a good apartment. I’m working in the hospital near here, the pay is good, and the people are great. I’m still doing some hours at the club, they plan on throwing a welcome back party. I’m sure you know of that by now,” she spoke, her voice light and her words floating in the air like feathers.

She had a way of speaking, it was as if her words carried the sweet delicacy that was the peak of spring and her voice was as soft as the flowers that bloomed.

“Yeah, we all plan on going,” he spoke, his voice amused as he did in fact know about the welcome back party, it was mentioned in the voice mail.

“As long as you don’t acknowledge me, we should be fine,” she spoke, sarcasm tinging her words as she tugged a laugh out of him.

The laughter ran with the air, being carried away by the refreshing spring wind. Jungkook saw the way she looked at that mask, the way she creased it and smiled at it. It holds many memories, it must have. She wore is to keep herself safe at the club, she wore it when she was hearing the many stories of everyone that landed in her room to talk about their lives.

It was like her battle uniform. It made him wonder how many people she stopped seeing, how many clients went to her to talk about their day and she just vanished after one incident. It made him wonder more an more why she chose to leave, when she could have staid and finished her profession here.

“Why did you leave?” The question sneaking its way out of his lips as she simply looked at him and smiled, her lips pressed together.

“Wasn’t it clear? Have you not connected the dots?” She asked, her voice thin as she chose the words that made him think.

Dr. Kwon told him she left to finish her profession. She needed some more training in the actual field, to be taught by an actual neurosurgeon and she got a good deal from the states. But she made it clear she was also leaving because she grew too attached to him. He always thought that her profession as a phycologist had rules that she can’t be friends with her clients, but it always felt like it was more than just that.

“So, you did like me,” he spoke, his mind already choosing the words.

His voice was soft and released in a hushed tone. He looked slightly ashamed and disappointed when she nodded, because he never even noticed that is what she felt. He knew that he grew a little too attached to her too, the way her leave affected him.

She shouldn’t have made an impact on him, but she did. And when his mind was clear a few weeks ago, he realized that he too had a strong attachment to her that surpassed that label of friend.

“I developed a crush on you over the summer we meet. It didn’t really go far, but it was there. When I meet you again, I thought it was all in the past. But the more time we spent talking, the more I grew attached to you, and the more I realized what I felt. I couldn’t do it Jungkook, it’s against the ethics of my profession, I had to leave,” she spoke, her voice gentle as it was thick with nostalgia.

“What about now?” He asked, his eyes meetings hers, the question being pulled out of his lips by that honest smile she showed.

“You have recovered, you are not my client. But now, my feelings changed, and yours did too. You already found someone, isn’t that right?” She spoke, the bright smile returning as she simply looked out into the river and spoke as if she was talking to no one.

He wondered how she knew his feelings, and how she knew he already has someone that he likes. But the more he stared at that bright smile, the more he wondered how it was possible for her to smile through everything. It was like she was born with it, it came so natural and easy to her.

But his mind wondered off again to how she knew that he already has someone. He wanted to tell her himself, he wanted to talk to her about his feelings because his ego made him think it was important for him to say it.

“Junhong,” he whispered, realizing that although he couldn’t contact her over the past two years, the older sure kept contact with her.

“So, Junhong and you finally made your relationship public,” she spoke, her voice full of amazement as she simply gasped.

“No!” He shouted, his voice full of shock as he didn’t know that joke was still between them.

He shook his head, laughing as she wouldn’t stop teasing him. She pulled her legs up the bench and turned to him, her voice high pitch and mocking as she begun to point her figure at his flushed cheeks.

“Yeah, it official. About time,” she kept on teasing, her voice simply full of laughter and amusement.

“That’s not what I meant. I should have known he told you,” he spoke, finally able to get the words out as he was simply laughing, getting interrupted and flustered to get much out.

She nodded, pulling away her haze as she simply crossed her legs and looked at him like a child waiting. Seconds rolled by, the laughter settled, and she looked at him as if she was proud of him. It was a look he’s never seen anyone show him, and it made his entire mind go blank.

“He told me when I came back. I have been refusing to ask questions about your personal life. It came at no surprise when he told me that you love Yein,” she spoke, her smile shining brighter as she was overwhelmed with glee at the thought.

“How come?” He asked, not knowing why it was not surprising to her in the least bit.

She shrugged, looking out to the river and seeing the people walk by. The laughter of children echoed down the path and the smell of the cherry blossoms was thick in the air.

“Yein was there for you from the start, she was always supportive of you, trying to take care of you and always tried to do the best for you. You didn’t want to hurt her, you thought she deserved better, those feelings of affection for each other grew into more. It’s quite sweet,” she said, her voice was sweet and content.

“And you? I always thought you and Junhong were going to be a thing.” She blew a raspberry, pulling he head back as if she was shocked hearing him say that.

He chuckled, not knowing quite well why she was so shocked by it and looked offended. It was amusing, but he did think it since the very beginning. Especially when Junhong would get overly protective of her and her reputation.

“Everyone does, I’m not particularly Junhong’s type though.” She sounded like she was hinting at something, as if there was a deep hidden meaning behind that. “Besides, I just started my career, a boyfriend isn’t at the top of my list. How are things at the company?” She asked, moving the conversation to the question that still needed to be asked.

He took a deep breath, letting the sweet air rolling from the west ingulf his senses. It has been a long journey, two years was a short time, but it was filled with many obstacles, many mountains to climb and many tumbles down the hills.

“Great, Jin’s plan succeeded. He, Yein and I are at the top of the chain. My father is still working at the company, its still hard for him to understand what my mother and he did to me. I don’t blame him for it,” he spoke, a sadden tone lingering in his words as he spoke of his father.

The plan to take over the company worked well in their favor. Moonbin and Junhong were both pushed in as investors. Junhong was able to join the board through a huge backing from Jungkook’s funds. Some investors made a bad move with a primal company and needed to sell their shares, making Moonbin and Junhong the head of the board and backed up all the decision the three CEO’s were making.

Yet, his father didn’t put much of a fight. It looked like the man was tired of fighting, he simply had a huge discourse with his son and was told by Dr. Kwon all the things his son went through. The man still finds it hard to believe everything, who wouldn’t? When someone just randomly came to call out all the things he did that made his son suffer, all the things that could have been different but were ignored, it was hard to suggest. When all the blame is placed to one person’s actions, it was hard to come to terms with it.

His father doesn’t talk much, he doesn’t disturb work. He is just going through every day, and Jungkook has grown to realize his father was also going through a lot. Therefore, he doesn’t hold much of a grudge towards the man anymore. It was all due to his growth as a person that he came to realize how easy and sweet the power of forgiveness can have.

“One day he will see, and you can finally have a normal relationship with your father.” She looked at him with hope, she sounded so sure that it will happen one day.

Her confidence, her assurance was refreshing. It made him truly believe that at the end of it all, through all his suffering and recovery, he can finally have a normal relationship with his father.

“I can finally answer your question,” he spoke, his mind wondering off to the questions that stumped him the most during their meetings.

“What question? I asked a lot in case you don’t remember,” she spoke, laughter lingering in her voice as she looked at him in a confused manner, not knowing what exactly he meant.

“What I want to do with my company, and who I want to be. I can answer them now.” The questions that had stopped his mind and created a storm inside his head, had become easier to answer over time.

“What is your answer?” She asked, leaning in towards him as she wondered many things.

His mental disorder messed with his identity and his view of life. He accepted that it had control over him, but he was able to come and take control of his own views. He has been able to view the world his own way and look at himself in his own eyes that weren’t clouded by anger and self-hatred.

“My company, I want to create a team that will focus on technology for the disabled and for natural disasters. Someone once told me I had the power to change the world, to take research that can make a difference and execute solutions. I want to make J.S. Corporation a company that can help people, even if it is only a small thing to do,” he spoke, his words falling into the air and floating there with no weight to them.

It felt great to say that out loud. It felt free to let the person who inspired him to make a change, know that he was actually going to take action. She smiled brighter, if that was even possible, and simply let her head fall a bit as a blush overtook her skin.

“The attempt is all that matters. Even if it is a small group, you will inspire many to reach out and help,” she spoke, a warmth tinting her cheeks as he knew she wasn’t expecting him to take her words literally.

She inspired him, showed that he could leave a mark. He had more money and power than he knew what to do with, the world was filled with walking banks that were hungry for more. They took everything and left nothing, and he wasn’t going to be the same. He was going to use his money, his power, the things he hated and make a positive mark on his country.

“Who I am, it's still a complex question. I am someone who recovered form a mental disorder, who loves to joke with his friends and loved the smell of spring. I love to dance and is a perfectionist when it comes to work, because many can be affected from a job badly done. I love silence and listening to music at late hours of the night. I’m not a walking bank nor a head strong boss, nor a weakling, I am just me.” He smiled in satisfactory as the question that never seemed to be answered correctly, finally had a true response.

He figured out the many version of himself he’s live through. The stingy boss that abused his power to put his workers bellow him. The walking bank who should care for nothing more than self-gain to earn more money. And the whiny son who just wanted attention that his parents infringed upon him.

He was none of that, he was just himself. He had control of his own actions, of his own life, of his own future.

“That is the answer we all wanted to hear. You are who you want to be, nothing defines you apart from you. Nice to meet the true Jungkook,” she spoke, her hand stretching out, resembling their first meeting.

“Are we starting with stupid cheesee now Jiwoo?” He whined, his hand grabbing hers in a sloppy and unmotivated manner.

“As if, Junhong told me you became rather grease over the year.” She asked, slapping his hand away as she pouted and acted with feign sadness.

They laughed a bit more, teasing each other as he complained that Junhong found anything cheese. But at one point the laughter was subduing, and they were left in the calm silence of spring. The birds sang their song as the people come and went, their laughter and joy filling up the scene that once held so many negative memories for him.

He looked over, looking at her calm aura and just feeling the warmth reach his heart again. Yein had showed him how to love, how to care for someone and take notice of all the little things he can do to show he cares. And with that, he can appreciate all the things everyone around him did.

“Thank you, for everything you did for me. For being my friend,” he said, feeling the words cling to his heart tightly as he couldn’t go one more day without saying how grateful he was.

She helped him, tried to be the light for his dark days. She offered a solution for him and look where it ended him. Healthy, in love with someone he never thought he deserved, and having a group of friends that pick him up when he falls down.

“Don’t thank me, it’s what being a friend is about. Besides, helping is what I do, it’s what I chose to do,” she spoke, her voice so sincere he truly believed she thought she had nothing to be thankful for.

“Is that why you are going back to the club?” He asked, the question lingering in his mind as the seconds went by.

She made a profession, she was a neurosurgeon who was also working to become a phycologist. She didn’t need to go back to the club to help people, she just needed to work. It seemed like that wasn’t enough for her though, it was clear she wanted to do more.

“There are people like you, people who don’t understand how important mental health is. Until this country figures out we should mend our minds as much as our bodies, you will always find me at The Kingdom Club,” she smiled, gripping the mask tighter before she placed it in her backpack and looked out into the river before them.

The world needs people like her, a friend like Jiwoo. He smiled brightly, the brightest he has in a while, knowing that there is someone out there that needs a friend, that needs to understand this crazy mad world. Someone who will get to meet her and have the sun shine their dark day.

 So, there you have it, the end of the story.

Thank you so much for reading, for sticking around through my mediocre writing, English is not my first language so I took up the hobby of writing to try and improve it. Hopefully you enjoyed.

Some last-minute closing things, Yein and Jungkook were always supposed to get together at the end, it was planned form the very beginning.

It was clear that Jungkook and Jiwoo both developed something for each other, but due to her work ethics, she couldn’t play off them.

Jiwoo is not Junhong’s type, when I developed this story, I made Junhong gay but since he isn’t just a gay character, I didn’t think it should have been mentioned in the story. That is why he made that one joke about going on a raw beef date with Jungkook, that was a hint.

I kept saying I wasn’t done with Yein, I really wasn’t. I was trying to make he a soft and lovable character that was there through thick and thin. She was always someone precious to Jungkook, enough that when he hurt her, it broke right through his impulses and anger that his disorder caused.

She cared for him, just as Jungkook and Jin cared for her when she was little. And since the wedding did happen, they just grew closer and closer, especially since she was the only one who was always there when Jungkook was going through therapy. Once he begun to recover, he saw her at a different light, and they fell in love.

Love isn’t the most important thing it this story, that is why I didn’t go off on it. The most important thing I was trying to convey is support. You don’t know what someone is dealing with mentally, what someone has gone through. It is important to pay attention to signs, and show support to friends that are struggling, because in the darkest time, a friend is the one thing than can save someone.

The last lesson is, no matter how much someone could be in the dark and wants to chose death, like Jungkook, there was always this part of him that yelled for live. There is a saying that people who want to die, are truly just screaming to start living. That is what inspired this story.

Mental health is still a taboo in society, in many countries, it is important we start looking at it as the problem it is. Rather than romanticizing it and hoping someone comes to save us, we have to take action.

Jungkook, until the very end was shouting for death. Until he opened his eyes, he saw what life was and realized that in order to start living for himself, he needed to do what everyone was pushing him towards, which was recovery.

The first step in solving any problem, is identifying there is one.

With that said, I hope you have an amazing day you amazing human. Thanks for reading, and have a good one!!