Yuri POV

We arrived at the studio in an hour because of Seo drove fast. As soon as I entered the studio I froze on the spot and turned back to them trying to walk out.  But I felt someone took my hand and stopped me. She is facing our members and whispered in my ear.

“Not now Yuri. You have to be strong. I am here. Remember?”

“B.. but seo” Tears fall down on my face and I felt my voice crack in the end.

“I know what you see and how you feel. But they are just standing next to each other. Not even talking or holding hands. Yuri, how can you think of performing if you can’t even look at them?”

Come on Yuri-ah! This is for the sake of members

I took a deep breath

I can do this.

“Remember my promise? I am here with you” Seohyun squeezed my hand and intertwined our fingers. I can feel the warmth in her hand and it gave me the sense of security and love. I put on my poker face and walked toward them smiling.

“Ya! Where the hell were you? I was calling you for past 3 hours you, idiot” Sooyoung came rushing to me and smacked my head.

Oh! They didn’t tell them what happened huh?

I wonder how they are going to announce that they are dating

“Aw! Soo. That hurts. I .. just went out with our maknea. We just wanted to relax a bit” I pout at her trying to show that nothing happened.

Other members gave me Are-you-crazy and what- the-hell-happened look and I pretended not to notice that. I still didn’t look at the “TaengSic couple” because I know the moment I look at them all the walls I build will crumble down.

“You went out with maknea? Since when you two got close?” Hyo-yeon asked raising an eyebrow and walked to the Seohyun.

Hyo-yeon is very protective of Seo since we were trainees. Mostly Soo and Hyo hang out and took care of her.

 “Since today. Why? Got a problem with that?” I asked matching her glare. She rolled her eyes at me and whispered something to Seo. She nodded her head and smiled at Hyo-yeon. But the moment I said that all members turned to look at someone. I followed their gaze and saw Jessica looking at us. I can tell she is close to crying because her eyes filled with tears and her lips tremble. But what happened next made my blood boil. I clenched my fingers and tighten my jaws trying to hold back the anger and the hurt I felt.

Taeyeon put her right arm around Sica’s shoulder and whispered something to her ear. I can tell whatever she is saying seems to work because she wiped her tears away and slowly smirked at me.

I was still staring at Sica when I heard when someone shouts at me.

“Now you visit here few times and know few roads you think you can go on your own. Do you know how worried I was? At least maknea had sense to send me a text message. You are not a kid anymore Kwon Yuri, so act like a one”

That was our manager Oppa. The tension within the room broke because of this sudden interruption. I sighed and turn to manager oppa who is practically fuming.

“If Seo sent you a message why you were worried? I just wanted fresh air”

“Smart ” he muttered.

“I…mmm still you are the older one. You should have more responsibility” He argued back loudly for me to hear.

“Are you….”

“We don’t have time to argue, Oppa. We need to get ready” I was going to give him a piece of my mind when Sunny cut off me. I know what he says is correct. But that moment I was too angry and sad to care.

“Let’s go Unni, stylist Unni asked to come now”

Yoona grabbed my hand and dragged me toward the waiting room to get ready. Seohyun let go of my hand and when I looked at her she smiled encouraging me to follow Yoona. I smiled back and mouthed a “thank you”. She shrugged her shoulders but I can tell she is happy because her eyes sparkle like it used to. She slowly followed us to the waiting room with other members.

I was sitting on a chair in the waiting room until stylist Unni does make up. I thought back to what happened few hours ago.

Flashback

“Yuri-ah, wake up” I felt someone caressed my hair and whisper near my ear.

Hmm Sica? I almost snuggle to her when I felt something is not right. Even her smell of perfume is different.  I leaned back and opened my eyes.

“Seo? Where are we? What happened” Memories of today events came rushing back to me.

“Mmmm You fell asleep while crying, Yuri. I didn’t know where to go so I just drive around and park near a secluded place”

“I… what’s the time now?” I asked while wiping my face with a towel Seo gave me.

“It’s almost 5.00pm now”

 We stayed silent for few minutes, both of us thinking about what to do.

I never thought she’ll do that to me you know. I am a ing idiot for trusting her and loving her

“I can’t do this anymore Seo” I whispered after few minutes.

“What? What do you mean…” she stopped in the middle and her eyes widen realizing what I am talking about.

“Please don’t tell me you are thinking of quitting snsd” she grabbed my hand and shouted.

“There is nothing for me there anymore, Seo. Besides I don’t think I have courage to see them together again” I looked down because I couldn’t look at her eyes anymore.

“So you are planning to waste all years of effort and runaway just because of her? Do you know how stupid that it?” Seohyun raised her voice and tighten her grip on my arm. This is the first time I see her like that.

“Seo”

“No! I listen to you all the time. Now you listen to me. Do you even know how many people love you, Yuri? Do you even think of your parents? They sacrificed a lot to bring you to who you are now. Don’t you remember how your dad followed you to SM every day for years until you stayed in the dorm? Don’t you remember how our fans cheered for you every time we go on stage? How the hell you forgot our members who love you and live with you all those years. So you are just going to forget all those things just because of a girl? Seriously Yuri? ” I can tell how angry and sad Seohyun because she is shouting but she is holding back her tears. Because she never lose her control like that.

“I know. But what can I do if I can’t forget her. I love her so much, Seo”

“So running away like a coward is the solution? Why you think I stayed in the group even after you reject me huh? Do you think I didn’t feel sad when I see you with Jessica Unni? I feel like dying every time I see you two. But I can’t just run away, because I owe my group, parents and fans who love me and made sacrifices for me.  Even if that’s not the case I owe myself for all the pain I went through to achieve my goal”

I knew our maknea acts like a matured person all the time but I never expected her to take it so well. I didn’t respond to her and thought about what she said. We fell silent again but it’s not awkward anymore. I realized what she said is true, but I wanted to talk about something else.

“Seo. I know I never got to say this after… mmm you know. But I want to apologize for what happened that day. I am not saying what you said is right. But I shouldn’t have play with your feelings. I am sorry about that. But I really think you’ll find someone that love you truly”

She didn’t say anything and just hugged me tightly. I was confused for a moment until she whispered “Thank you” in my ear and kissed the side of my head. Then she leaned back in her seat.

“Let’ make a deal. You won’t cry like that again and will tell me anything that bother you”

“But what do you get in return?”

“Let me stay with you.. as… as a friend” she paused for a moment and finished.

Am I doing the right thing?

“Are you sure, Seo. I don’t want to hurt you more than I already did. I...I can’t give what you expect. I am not ready to let her go” I said looking down. But what surprised me was her reply. She chuckled.  When I looked at her she looked amused by what I said. But I saw pain flash through her eyes for a moment.

“Do you think I’ll stoop that low to make you love fall for me? I already accepted it’s a lost course the moment you walked out that day. I just want to see you smile again Yuri even when I know it’s not for me”

“I.. don’t know what to say anymore, Seo. Thank you”

I wiped away the tears on my cheeks and smiled at her.

“As long as you are happy, Yuri. I got lots of messages from members. Let’s go back. It’s time for the show”

End of flashback

“OK you are done” Stylist Unni said walking toward Seohyun who is sitting to my right. I looked around through mirror and I found myself staing at the sleeping girl in the sofa. It’s a natural for me to seek for Sica every time we are in the same place, because we both did that even when we were trainees. She must have done make up earlier when were out. I hate myself because I couldn’t control my feeling when it comes to Sica. Suddenly she opened her eyes and looked directly at me like she knew I was looking at her. We stared at each other’s’ eyes trying to find the answers to thousands questions run through my mind. Her gaze hold me in place that I felt helpless and I knew I couldn't even look away even if I want to. 

“Staring won’t help to get what you want you know. I hope you realize what you are going to lose just because you are too stubborn to hear what she has to say” I was startled and turn to looked at the person beside me. I raised my eyebrows silently asking “what did you mean?”

How come she knows what happened when other members didn’t?

Sunny must have heard us when we shout

She just shrugged her shoulders and closed her eyes acting like she didn’t know what I am talking about.

I know exactly what I am going to lose when I continue to acts like this. But the real question is do I have enough courage to listen to what Sica has to say?  Should I take that risk of hurting myself by giving a chance to Sica?

---------------------------------------------------

Hey guys,

I took time to update, didn't I? It's because I was wondering how to continue this story. I don't want it have the same story like another fanfic. I want this to be unique. I still didn't make my decision. So let's see what will happen..

Looks like TaengSic is going to be a real couple? o.O Hmmm and what if Yul fall for Seo...  ha ha I want to know what  you think. So please leave a comment on your ideas. I hope you are not dissapointed with lack of YulSic... It will come .. maybe :P *evil laugh*

ha ha I want to say "HAPPY NEW YEAR" for you! yes. you my friends that upvote, comment and even silent readers.... I am glad you still follow this story. Even it can be boring and full of errors... I seriously love you guys!!! and please take care of yourself and stay healthy. I wish all your dreams may come true.. Next year will be the BEST year in your life because you can achieve your dreams! :) 

See you guys with next chapter ok? Maybe I'll upload a one on or before January 1st... IF I get time and idea :) see you and take care guys *wave*