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When the Bluebells were blooming

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As if angels were whispering in her ears singing soft melodies to carrasse her tired soul - woking up in the morning felt like that. Her head was heavy from the amount of alcohol she had drank, but the hungover that made every other day a sacrifice never really hit in. Chaerin just sat up on her futon a little confused and listened to the faraway song in awe. It was echoing through the apartment. The voice was silky and faint embracing her ears like a warm blanket.

It was nostalgic. She felt this way the first time in her life when she heard Bom’s voice on the day she entered the agency. It was a really slow, a bit gloomy ballad just like the one someone sung now.

And then her mind clicked. Someone was indeed singing. It didn’t came from some sort a device, it came from an actual person. From her actual home. And probably from her actual bathroom.

It was Sandara. She sang freely and her voice was really pretty. Chaerin was so lost in the quiet lullaby for a minute she didn’t even notice that the language was completely unknown for her. It wasn’t korean nor chinese or japanese. She would recognize those, but not this one.

The streaming of the shower stopped. She rubbed at her face trying to get the sleep out of her eyes when the brunette opened the door wearing her waitress uniform. She glanced at the blonde in surprize and neither of them spoke for a minute. The girl looked shocked like a sinner who got caught while Chaerin was still wrapped up in her thoughts. She couldn’t believe she finally could hear Sandara’s voice so strong and free. Even if it was only a sad lubally. 

"Do you have a headache?" asked the girl finally breaking the silence between them not knowing what else could she say.

Ignoring the question Chaerin said. "Your voice is beautiful."

Sandara’s cheeks turned red instantly creating a great contrast with her light blue shirt. She averted her gaze.

"So you indeed heard me." The brunette stated in defeat. It was embarrassing, really. She loved to sing, but a lot of people said that her voice was bad thus she lost her confidence showing it to anyone. The only reason she dared to do that now was Chaerin’s habit to sleep like a rock. She didn't even woke up at Sandara moving around in the house. The girl hoped she will sleep deeply for a little more so that she won’t hear her. 

"What was this song? I don’t know it."

Sandara wasn't planning to answer this question, but Chaerin got up from the futon wincing in pain. The girl handed a glass of water and painkillers to her and when she finished it the blonde looked her in the eyes so deeply it was hard to face her. Her lips parted without hesitation forming quiet words.

"Well… it’s kind of uh… old. I’m sure you wouldn't know it if I tell you the title."

"And what language was that?"

Sandara sighed. It was so careless of her, but her emotions took over her mind. The love for the song and for her home made her sing this piece.

"Tagalog" She admitted with a sad smile. There was no point on denying it. Chaerin wasn't stupid. She would find out eventually.

"You speak Tagalog?!" Chaerin exclaimed forgetting her hungover for a moment. It was such a surprize. "So you are from the Philippines?"

Sandara never planned to share this information about her life with her, but there was no turning back in that conversation. If she wouldn't say anything, that would mean she agreed with Chaerin’s questions but it would mean lying. And somehow the thought of lying to this precious person made her heart ache. She already hated herself for being such a burden to her.

"No, I… I just lived there. But I’m from Busan."

Chaerin just stared at her for moments. Her look was so deep and strong, it was hard for Sandara not to avert her gaze, but the blonde didn't noticed her struggles. She was lost in thoughts. Were these actual informations about Sandra’s life? It felt too much. Two weeks went by without getting out of the brunette anything more than her favourite food and drink, the books and films she likes… She would not share anything serious. Chaerin thought it must be due to some kind of fear the girl have felt. She even suspected that her silence was connected to the fact that those two men were chasing the girl when they first met. But Sandara finally spoke up and Chaerin found out small pieces of her life. Why now? Though she still felt curious, she was satisfied with this much things at all. Knowing these somehow made her happy.

Chaerin didn't have the chance to ask more because it was time for the girl to head for work if she didn't want to arrive late. Chaerin just watched as Sandara left the apartment hurriedly never saying anything more on the matter.


So she is a Busan girl? – thought the blonde. It would explain her accent. Though it was hard to notice, she really did not spoke the way herself did.


And she even lived in the Philippines? That’s why she doesn't have papers? – Though this thought seemed silly. The Philippines has real government and administrations too, of course they could give papers to their people.

For a while she just stood in the middle of her kitchen area trying to think things thought. It was hard with a massive headache throbbing against her skull though. After ten minutes she realized they had a day off. Their CEO gave everybody in the agency a day for resting after that hard party they had. Without thinking she dialed Bom’s phone number.

 

~*~


Looked like that day had more surprises for her. The slight hungover was still lingering over her head, she still felt like crap, but at least the headache was not too strong anymore thanks to the painkillers Sandara gave her. Though when she met her friends in the café and told them what happened in the morning, she realized that there was something off about their reaction. Bom and Minji glanced at eachother without any astonishment in their eyes, but they looked a bit nervous. Chaerin didn't really understand this until Bom started to speak…

Her headache came back in an instant hitting her skull forcefully, and she just massaged her temples with both elbows on the table. The blonde looked up at her friends and gasped her gaze between them.

"Is that true?" she asked Bom, and the redhead just nodded.

"At least that’s what she had told me."

Though basically Bom was a really nice person, Chaerin knew she had her moments as well. If she really was demanding with the girl last night, it’s understandable that Sandara would eventually tell her this. It’s not easy to resist Bom. But this somehow hurt her. Bom knew something about Sandara before her, this drove her nuts. It even occured to her that Sandara told her about her origins this morning because the redhead already got out of her this much information. Nonetheless, she would like to think that today was different. That Sandara told her these of her own will, because she wanted to. Because she wasn't afraid to.


"She’s living illegally in the country. That’s why she has no papers and probably this is also the reason why she doesn't want to tell you anything." Bom’s words echoed through her head unstoppably, again and again.

Illegal, illegal, illegal… It sounded so wrong. She couldn’t belive that anything bad in this world could take place in the same sentence with Sandara’s name. She was so kind, so gentle, and too modest and naive for these harsh and ugly words.

But it explained a few things, though. She didn’t tell Bom about the Phillipines part, but she finally started to understand the bigger picture, the reasons behind the brunette’s actions.

Sandara was born in Busan, later moved to the Philippines. She could lived there for quite a long time if she even learned songs in perfect tagalog. But the way she came back to the country wasn’t right. She didn’t have even an identity card with herself. And those men… People were chasing her thus she was jumpy in the beginning. She may be afraid that they want to deport her back? This girl was still a mystery. Every new information she learned about her raised new questions as well.

But why did she came to Korea? Not for working as a waitress, that’s for sure. Though she didn't want to tell this the girls, but a few days earlier she got a phone call from her former boss. The owner of the Blue fish asked wether Sandara had previously jobs as a waitress before, because she worked as a total beginner. Though the old man didn't mind it, Sandara was a good employee regardless filling in the gaps of inexperience with diligence. But Chaerin could no longer knew what to think. If she wasn't a waitress in that club she run away from… then what?

"Guys, I’m not sure about this, but…" Upon hearing Minji’s voice Chaerin snapped her head up "the name Sandara is kind of uncommon, isn’t it?"

"Yeah, and?" asked Bom sipping her tea.

"What was her surname again?" inquired the maknae, and Chaerin readily answered.

"Park."

"And she said she was born in Busan. Or at least she grew up there. What do you think how many Park Sandara could have born in Busan around the time she did?"
"Sandara Park" interrupted Chaerin, then the two female just looked at her surprised. "She puts her family name at the back." And she finally knew why. Previously the girl didn't dare to tell her and Chaerin didn't ask either, but it was clear now. In the Philippines they must have use surnames differently. 

"Nevermind" waved Minji with her hand. "If she was born in Korea she was registered with her family name in the front. And I think we could ask someone about it, you know. If she is telling the truth we can find out."

Chaerin somehow didn't like the idea. Searching for answers about the girl’s life behind her back seemed wrong, but she also knew that she won’t have any other chance to find out things about her unless the brunette will told her, which sounded unlikely. Today could be an exception. If she wanted to help her, she needed to know a few things. As much as she adored Sandara, the fact that she stayed in the country illegally raised some doubts.

Bom and Minji in the meanwhile were in the middle of a discussion on how to find out the truth, but the blonde did not hear their words. She was still under the influence of the excitement from the party last night, and the information flood that morning. The slow pace, she thought would be better for the girl and she would eventually speak up, was gone. 

 

~*~


They did it. They really did it!

Minji’s father had connections in Busan, and through an old friend who was a police officer now a government employee had a peek at Sandara’s file. She indeed was born and raised in Busan. Minji told her this during a phone call and Chaerin was so nervous she almost crashed her phone. Finally… They had to wait for days until they found someone who had access to official files but now a few things came to light.

Until the age of twelve she lived and attended schools in Busan and then moved to the Philippines with her family. Her blood type is A. Her last address is also an apartment in Busan, but after the moving to the other country they lost connection with them. If she really left to live in the Philippines by that age, she couldn’t spent there too many years. She didn't look older than a high school student. She must be smart if she could master another language during this time. 

"When is her birthday?" asked Chaerin with a smile. How strange that she never asked this, though it’s a basic information. The thought that she would finally know this made her happy, even if she knew that it’s not right to rummage in other’s past without their approval. But she was delightful. Sandara was a good girl after all. She didn’t tell her much, but it was all true.

"On the 12th of November" answered Minji in a quiet tone. There was a sudden change in her voice that did not escaped her attention.

"Minji? What is it?"

"She was born in the year of the Rabbit"

Something was weird about it. Chaerin tried to remember what year is that counting back from her own birth year, but the result was somehow off. Sandara can’t be this young. The blonde thought she might be a teenager, but this way she would be only thirteen. They left the country when she was twelve, it can’t be right.

"In 1987" Minji finished her report.

Hm? What… 

In ’87? But that means…

That’s impossible! She almost yelled out loud in her surprise. Sandara was older than her! And not only with a year or two, but four! Oh my god, and she thought all along that the brunette was the younger one. She even spoke to her informally from the beginning. Oh god, oh, this… this can’t be true…

"Chaerin?" came Minji’s voice from the other end of the line.

But she has such a youthful appearance. Her face looks so young! Even Bom thought Sandara was younger than her.

"Are you there, Chaerin?"

The ’girl’ was in reality a woman now. Probably more mature than her, yet she behaved and looked like a high school student. How can be this real?
"Yes" She finally managed to mumble. "I’m here."

Chaerin heard key clanging. She turned her head towards the front door, then at the clock hanging on the wall. It was almost eleven pm. It was probably Sandara, it was time for her to came back from her night shift. She almost forget it. Since it was her first day working till this late, Chaerin told her they would celebrate after work. But now she didn't even know if she was able to do it.

The door opened and a surprisingly tired-looking Sandara stepped in. She smiled kindly at the blonde and greeted her as she did every day, but when she saw the shock written all over Chaerin’s face, her smile disappeared. Sandara dropped her bag on the floor and hurried to the blonde.
"Is everything alright, Chaerin-ah? Something happened?"

She just watched the worry illuminating from the dark irises, then said her goodbyes to Minji in a quiet tone. Chaerin put down her phone onto the table, then glanced at the girl… no, the woman in front of her. She was a woman. Older than her. Older by four years. She still couldn't believe it. Looking at her flawless, shiny skin and big, curios eyes… like a young teenager. She was beautiful as always even in her tired state.

No. Nothing was alright. She finally started understand the facts she tried to ignore before. But now she knew she was right. Reality hit her hard, and she felt her body grew weak. The puzzle of Sandra’s life was almost finished, only a few pieces were missing, but Chaerin could see what was this all mess about.

Though sometimes she felt hurt that Sandara don't share too much things with her, moreover she was even suspicious whether she has ulterior motives, but right now she just wanted to kick herself for assuming anything bad about the girl. She understood it now. She knew why the brunette didn't wanted to speak about her past. If she guessed the truth right, even Chaerin herself wouldn’t wanted to tell anybody about it. Hence she even never really shared everything about her own past. Sandara must have suffered a lot… She can’t let this happen to her again. 

"It's good you are here" Chaerin whispered quietly, then she cautiously pulled the brunette to a loose embrace. Sandara just stared straight ahead a bit surprised placing her chin on the blonde’s shoulder, but soon she returned the gesture by hugging the blonde back.

"Chaerin-ah?"

Her heart was aching for the brunette. Sandara can never find out that she now knew almost everything, that would ruin their relationship. She hoped Sandara would tell her these herself if she was comfortable enough to. And Chaerin will wait till then. 

"Yes. Everything’s fine." She said after all, than pulled away holding Sandara’s shoulders. „But I promised we would have a party, right?” The blonde grinned at her. "How was the night shift? Are you tired? I made you dinner in case you are hungry…"

Sandara looked puzzled listening to the flood of words, but she let Chaerin with a smile to grab her arm and pull her towards the dining table. It was unbelivable that the blonde wanted to celebrate even a small thing she completed her first night shift, like it was a big achivment. It was as if Chaerin would encourage her to work, to never give up even if it’s hard. She was incredibly grateful in every minute that she met her, that she took her in, that she helped her get this job with such nice people, but she felt more grateful on days like this. She never felt more at home in years than in her apartment. The fierce blonde who was never afraid to step onto stage wearing extreme but fashionable clothes, the cool rapper who wrote harsh songs, and who was bold enough to put stupid people in their place, was a surprizingly caring person in their everyday life. Sandara felt that she could never return her kindness, but she tried to. She wanted to give something to Chaerin as well. Never in her life such warmth flooded her heart because of anybody, and she wanted Chaerin to feel the same what she is doing to her. Someday maybe she will sucseed despite the fact that she wasn’t as loveable as Chaerin. It was such easy to like this blonde. Sandara wanted to show her how much she changed her life for good.

 



Hiii~ long time no see. University is a bit hectic right now but I hope I can update at least in every month.

About today’s chapter: yeah, Sandara in this fanfic a bit younger than in real life. I just wanted them to have a bit smaller .

What do you think about the update? I finally wrote something about Sandara as well :3 I will reveal the full truth about her when time comes but I’m afraid you won’t thank me that, because the bad things will be about the start then. Please wait for it regardless. 

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Comments

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Juralen26 #1
Chapter 18: Hello author. I really do hope you can continue this story and hope also you can finish it.. Your story is so good.. Pls. Update
Frozen2big
#2
Chapter 18: Hello author. I hope you continue with the story and finish it. You are doing so well. Thanks!
WonderWoman799 #3
Chapter 18: I know I’m really late but I do hope you can update this story soon please it’s so good and heartbreaking at the same time what great job author-nim. :)
fckinglovechaera #4
Chapter 18: I hove chaerin able meet dara soon. I mean soooonnnn.....haha
fourever2ne1 #5
Chapter 18: Oh you are finally back!!! I would like to read the story until the end as well... Fighting author!!!
ahille #6
Chapter 18: Finally!! I hope that chae wil save dara ^^
2addicted2ne1 #7
Chapter 18: Welcome back! I really hope u can finish this story too... it is really good
tessaymeg #8
Chapter 17: Waaaaaa update please
real_als #9
Chapter 17: Pls updateeeeee
hoelang #10
Chapter 17: i love it!