"Soo, you're crazy"


Chanyeol had just entered Kyungsoo's house an hour after the incident of missing the milkman, to find an ecstatic Kyungsoo jumping up and down and pulling him inside abruptly.
"Think of it Chan! I devise a way to get him to fall for me, and then we'll both get what we want!" Kyungsoo excitedly motioned with his hands, accidently hitting Chanyeol's arm. Chanyeol made a clicking noise with his tongue in annoyance and rubbed his hurt arm.
"Tch. How will that benefit both of you?" He sighed and picked up his bag of crisps. He opened it loudly and popped one into his mouth. Crunch.
Only when he looked up did he realise that Kyungsoo was looking at him with an expression of exasperation.
"Don't you see Chanyeol? I can get Kai to fall for me, which obviously is my top priority. And then Kai will fall in love with me!" Kyungsoo clasped his hands together and stared dreamily into the distance.
"Hello?" Chanyeol waved his hand in front of Kyungsoo's face. "Earth to Soo. Isn't it a bit big headed to think that Kai's benefit is to be in love with you? And what if he's not even gay?" Chanyeol rolled his eyes. Way back, when he knew Kyungsoo as a teenager, he was still as clueless and gullible as he was now.
Kyungsoo's dreamy expression quickly morphed into a face of panic. He hit Chanyeol on the arm again, this time deliberately.
"Don't say that Chan! Plus, this is exactly why I thought of this project! I'll get him to fall head over heels with me, regardless of if he's gay or not." Kyungsoo hit his open palm with his fist, brows furrowed in determination.
"Hah. You're cute." Chanyeol popped another crisp into his mouth. He leaned back on the sofa that he was relaxing on and grabbed the tv remote. Turning on the television, he began flicking through channels aimlessly. Kyungsoo stood up abruptly without notice and turned around, dashing into another room.
"Kyungsoo?" Chanyeol turned his head round to stare at the spot Kyungsoo used to be in.
Kyungsoo darted back into the room, as quickly as he'd left, a notepad and pen grasped in his small hands.
"We need to brainstorm ideas." He said shortly, a faint blush spreading across his cheeks.
"Oh jesus christ." Chanyeol leaned his head back, so it was dangling over the back of the sofa and closed his eyes.
There was a pause in the silence.
"Fine. If it's what you want." He replied airily, eye's still closed.
Kyungsoo bit his lips in an attempt to stifle a grin and quickly placed the materials down on the coffee table in front of Chanyeol. He slid onto the sofa, next to Chanyeol.
"Hey." Kyungsoo poked Chanyeol's stomach playfully, causing him to jerk his head up from his previous position.
"C'mon. Ideas?" He professionally smoothed out the paper on the notepad, which now rested on his lap and thoughtfully chewed on his pen.
"Isn't this your idea? Why should I help?" Chanyeol snickered and leaned his head back, closing his eyes once again.
"Yah! Park Chanyeol, you are my best friend and you are entitled to help me through hard times!"
"Hard times?" Chanyeol sniggered again and drunkenly raised his head to look at Kyungsoo. "Yeah, not dating a milkman is going through 'hard times'"
Kyungsoo turned his head away in a huff. He crossed his arms and sat in silence for a few minutes. Noticing that he wasn't receiving a response, he slightly tilted his head around to sneak a peek at Chanyeol's slumped figure. To his dismay, Chanyeol had dozed off on his sofa.

"CHAN FRICKIN YEOL. WAKE YOUR LAZY UP RIGHT NOW!"

Chanyeol jerked awake from his previously pleasant nap to awaken in front of a red faced fuming Kyungsoo. He instantly froze. Never get on Kyungsoo's bad side, was Chanyeol's number one rule of being Kyungsoo's Best Friend.
"He-Hey..." Chanyeol laughed lamely. "No need to get mad...let's all calm down..."
Kyungsoo stood in front of Chanyeol's body, a cocky satisfied smirk on his face.
"You won't think of dozing off next time will you, Chanyeeeoool​?" Kyungsoo smiled evilly, dragging out the last parts of Chanyeol's name. "You know what it's like to get on my bad side..." He let out a manic laugh.
"Yeah, yeah I know." Chanyeol muttered. "Satansoo."
"What did you say?" Kyungsoo held up his finger accusingly.
"Nothing! Nothing." Chanyeol disguised his laugh with a cough.


"So let's get down to business." Kyungsoo cleared his throat. He was kneeling on the floor opposite Chanyeol, who was lounging on the sofa. The coffee table was in between them. Kyungsoo placed his notebook horizontally onto the table in between them and wrote in small letters "Project Win Kai's Heart:Ideas" and circled around it.
"So let's see..." He hummed thoughtfully. "Ah ha!"
He drew a smooth line extending from the circled writing in the middle and wrote "Shower scene." on the end of the line.
"I was inspired by what happened this morning." Kyungsoo grinned. 
Chanyeol narrowed his eyes. "What exactly are you thinking?"
"Let me explain!" Kyungsoo exclaimed, flustered. "So it goes like this..."

Scenario #1
Kai knocked on the door. No reply. He sighed. He'd been waiting for over 5 minutes, and he need to deliver to other customer's houses as well. He tapped his foot impatiently and glanced at the watch on his wrist. Damn. He was late. He thought "Ah well, it. I have a job to do." and was about to turn around briskly on his heel and walk away. However, just as he started to twist around, the door flew open abruptly.
"I'm so sorry" A smooth voice came out of the doorway. "I was just in the shower.  I didn't mean to make you wait. Will you forgive me?"
Kai raised his eye's to look at the voice. His jaw dropped to the ground when he was faced with Kyungsoo clothed in only a small towel, wrapped loosely around his waist. There were still beads of water rolling down his milky white chest and one hand was casually drying his hair with another small towel. Kai's eyes bulged as wide as saucers as they traveled up and down Kyungsoo's body. He could almost feel himself drooling at the sight.
"N-no you're o-okay." What was wrong with himself? Stuttering like that? He tried to swallow but his throat had suddenly closed up, He started choking because his swallow was stuck halfway.
"Oh my! Are you alright?" There was that smooth voice again. Suddenly he felt a warmth on his back. The man at the door was patting him on the back, trying to calm down his cough. Kai quickly straightened up and stepped backwards. He felt his face redden with embarrassment and cleared his throat. His eyes flickered everywhere except towards the man standing in front of him.
"U-um...I need to collect your milk bottle." His words felt dry in his mouth. Suddenly, everything he said sounded like an innuendo.
"Oh, you want my milk bottle?" The man questioned. "Oh right! My empty one. So...do you ahem want it now?" The man smirked. Kai choked again. He felt himself sweating, even in the cool weather.
"Well, I'll go get it." The man said abruptly and turned around. Kai heard him rustling around some objects and then heard him walking back to the door.
"Here it is. Are you...alright? You seem awfully red. Got a fever?" The man mused. 'A fever from you.' Kai thought. He blushed even more than possible at his own thought. His heart was pounding right out of his chest. He needed to leave, now.
"I'll s-see you..." Kai quickly turned around and began walking back to his car.
"Oh! Wait!" The man called out. Kai turned around. For some reason, he walked back to the doorstep.
"I need to ask if- agh!" The man stumbled and fell forward against Kai, pressing him to the door frame. Kai was now trapped underneath the man, who had managed to balance himself and prop his body back up. However, the man had both his hands planted on either side of Kai's head against the wall, to break his fall.
Kai squeaked and turned his face to the side, desperately staring at his car, off in the distance. He felt the man's arm brushing against his cheek and felt his breath fanning across his face. Kai turned his head to look at the man's face and almost fainted when he realised the close proximity that they were in. The man was staring at Kai's lips, an almost hungry look in his eyes. He leaned in and-


"Stop! okay okay okay okay....WHAT? When did you turn so dirty?" Chanyeol sat up and exclaimed with a look of horror on his face.
"Jeez, Soo! I think I'm scarred...ugh. This isn't even realistic! Why would he suddenly be attracted to you?! He might not even be gay! And when did you turn into some sort of macho model guy?" Chanyeol gaped at Kyungsoo, questions pouring out of his mouth.
"Hey!" Kyungsoo defended. "I came up with this pretty quick! so lay off! As for the macho model...aren't I pretty much like one any way? I don't see why this won't work." He glowered.
Chanyeol sighed inwardly. Kyungsoo was ...too innocent. He didn't understand how relationships and romance worked. Chanyeol cursed himself for letting Kyungsoo watch anime and read Manga all day. He had these unrealistic ideas about love.
He loved his best friend. It saddened him to think that Kyungsoo was obsessing over this one guy that didn't even notice him. Heck, he isn't even supposed to notice him. He's his milkman for god's sake. Chanyeol shook his head to gather his thoughts and turned back to Kyungsoo.

"Okay...so I'm not sure that'll work. Lets try some different ideas okay? We can discuss the... shower scene later. Kay, Soo?" Chanyeol smiled hopefully at his friend.
"Yeah, I guess" Kyungsoo replied with a sullen face.
"Cheer up Kyungie! Haha" Chanyeol grinned, ruffling his hair.
Kyungsoo smiled. "You haven't called me Kyungie for a long time. It's nostalgic."
"Oh really?" Chanyeol beamed.
"Yup." Kyungsoo looked down, absent mindedly twisting his pen around in his hand. "I still hate it."
"Oh." Chanyeol stared at his clasped hands. That turned quiet way too quickly.

Chanyeol stood up. "I'm going to get a glass of water." Chanyeol had been to Kyungsoo's apartment countless times, so he knew where everything was. It was basically his second home. He couldn't recall how many times he had stayed over at Kyungsoo's for a sleepover and pulled an all nighter instead, both of them giggling in fits of laughter over the jokes they shared until they had abs in the morning.
Chanyeol thought back to last weekend. They had both gone to the cinema and watched an action packed disaster movie. It was pretty rubbish, if you were talking about plot and development. Weren't all teenager action movies like that nowadays? But the cgi was pretty cool.
Hmm. Chanyeol had an idea. Forgetting about his glass of water, he quickly walked back to the living room.

"Hey Soo, I've got an idea. Pass me the pen." Chanyeol caught the pen that was tossed to him and bent over the notebook. He drew another line extending from the center and scribbled something next to it. He stood up triumphantly after. Kyungsoo bent over the notebook, eyes squinting at Chanyeol's scrawly handwriting.
"Robbery defence Hero: Kyungie" Kyungsoo slowly read out. "What does that mean?" He questioned.
"Well" Chanyeol triumphantly pushed his chest out. "You will attract Kai by your pure awesomeness. Let me explain! So here's how it goes..."