“We have to tell them.”

“We can’t tell them.”

“We have to tell them.”

“We're not telling them.”

D.O rubbed his face for the nth time. His hair had gotten slightly messy where he passed his hands, but the hairspray had done a great job in keeping it styled.

He was feeling frustrated. After their initial shock and crying craze of denial, they fell into deep silence as the truth settled in. Still shaken, they tried to find a different explanation to the damn number. But no one could refute Lay’s theory. It made sense. It explained everything.

Those clones they found weren’t just possible replacements, nor were they meant to be an army of super soldiers. Those clones were them; their bodies as they progressed through the dangerous trials. It explained how they managed to survive this far and why they all have the same damn memories. It didn't matter what their past was like because it was all a fabricated lie. The reason they had memories was for them to have an origin, a default childhood implanted into their minds, so they could believe they had some humanity –to believe they weren’t completely artificial.

Their lives were illusory. They couldn't remember when the trials started or how old they were –even if they had no age they could’ve tried to estimate comparing how young they must’ve been at the beginning of the trials to what they were like now. They just knew they were down there, in that underground dome to be experimented on, but no one could remember how it started. It was comparable to realizing you're dreaming, without having an idea of how the dream started or how you got to the point you're at. There's a vague feeling that there must have been a beginning, but no matter how much you try to remember you can’t ever find the start. That was what the fabricated memories made them feel like –as if they had an origin.

And the memories all circled around Mama. She was the main figure of their fictitious childhood, she was meant to be the mother figure –their guardian. Her presence is what kept them grounded into the reality they lived. She gave them a sense of security and belonging. The trials were their home and they obeyed and went through the tests, wanting nothing more than to make their ‘mother’ proud. Wanting Mama’s approval was all they long for, under the belief that she used to love and care for them as a mother did –in those fabricated memories.

It was strange how D.O had always had the feeling that Mama wasn't his real mother. And when she tricked him with the stories, he was certain he had a family out there –a real family. But even if he was the first, even if there was a possibility that he had come from the outside, he was still a 2. He had died once, his first body perished some time before and now he was the first follow up. His body was new and his mind had been manipulated, they must've implanted the default memories that the group shared. So, even if he came from the outside, he had the same memories as the group; which meant he was just another creation from Mama’s laboratory, like the rest of them.

D.O vaguely remembered having many scars across his legs and scattered throughout his body from his first trials. But now he had none other than the scratches from the fight and escape from the second dome. His renewed skin was an eerie confirmation that his body was new –just like Kai’s.

D.O’s mind wandering stopped when he saw that Lay scooted towards the sleeping boys. He held Baekhyun’s head carefully and rubbed the back of his neck.

“What are you doing?” Kai asked with a soft hoarse voice.

“I can’t stand seeing it,” he answered, brows knitted as he made the effort to reach over and touch Jongdae’s nape.

Kai stayed silent as he observed the healer cover up the codes. D.O watched as well when Lay sat back down and rubbed his own neck. His back was towards D.O so he was able to see the strands of hair grow out and cover the ink -the newly grown hair being darker than his dyed hair.

“Did I get it all?” he asked turning to him.

D.O answered with a silent nod.

Luhan got up and walked across the room to sit in front of the healer. “Cover mine,” he requested.

D.O noticed Kai’s longing eye's as the teleporter stared at the other two. He felt a pang in his chest as he understood that Kai wanted to cover his code too, and that made him feel guilt. He was the one who insisted in uncovering the codes and finding out their meaning. He didn’t think the truth would be so horrible and now none of his friends wanted to deal with their discovery. Why did Mama give him the hint? Why did she want him to find out the truth? Why did she play these games?

D.O settled with hiding his code by lifting his sweater's hood, while Lay forced Kai’s hair to grow back.

“Luhan, I’ve been wondering,” D.O started slowly, his voice was still hoarse from crying. “What did you see? I mean, what did you hear in Mama’s mind?”

“Does it matter?” Luhan said uninterested. “It didn’t make sense anyway.”

“I…” he retracted his intention.

“You’ve got to stop keeping things to yourself D.O,” Kai said annoyed. But he didn’t seem angry, he just looked tired.

“It’s not that I’m keeping them to myself just because. I, I’m not sure of what to say yet,” he defended himself.

“Well, just talk. We might figure it out together,” Kai sounded more considerate this time.

“Okay,” D.O said and sorted his thoughts. “Where do I even start?” he mumbled as he rubbed his face. The others remained silent, waiting for him to speak. “Why? Just, why did she give us the hint?”

“What?” Lay asked.

“I was the only one who got it, maybe she hoped you guys would’ve figured it out too, but it was me who understood,” he began to explain.

“I wasn’t awake,” Luhan mumbled, resting his chin against his hand.

D.O shook his head and continued, ignoring his comment. “I don’t understand why? She wanted to ing kill me, but at the same time she gave me the answer.”

“I never understood that crazy ,” Luhan muttered annoyed.

Lay shook his head, as if saying ‘I don’t either’.

“Me neither,” Kai sighed.

“I feel like there’s more to her, but she’s so, so… abstruse,” D.O opined. “I can’t figure her out either.” He paused as he remembered something. “Future Kai had visited me that morning. He told me that we had to confront the trial in order to learn the truth. I thought it was about the third trial, but maybe… Maybe it was this.” He frowned, “Why did he just warn me? He should’ve told someone else.”

Lay furrowed his brows as he thought about it. “He must’ve known you would survive,” he opined.

“Okay, yeah. He could’ve known,” he agreed. “But Mama? She couldn’t possibly have known you would save me.”

“If you think about,” Lay hummed as he looked up. “If she hadn’t provoked you, if you two hadn’t argued and brought it up, then maybe she wouldn’t have given us the hint.”

D.O knitted his brows as he analyzed it. Lay was right. If she hadn’t angered him, if he hadn’t talked back, then maybe she wouldn’t have even mentioned it. She certainly wouldn’t tell them out of whim, that wasn’t like her. She’d rather take an indirect route, by manipulating and steering their path, giving them hints and influencing them to figure things out on their own.

“Brought up what?” Luhan asked, his eyes scanning them to see whose mind he should read. Lay caught his gaze and D.O didn’t mind him telling Luhan.

 

“I’m worried about you,” Kai said to him, taking advantaged that the other two weren’t paying attention. “She said she has your clone.”

That was something D.O didn’t want to deal with yet.

“She could’ve been lying,” D.O brushed off.

“What if she wasn’t?” Kai asked concerned. “D.O-”

“It doesn’t matter right now,” he cut off irritated.

Kai was stunned at being silenced, the worry never leaving his eyes. Lay cleared out his throat, making them aware that the other two had rejoined the conversation.

“So,” Luhan began, continuing the previous conversation, “if it weren’t for you, we wouldn’t have figured this, this…” Luhan pointed at the back of his head, “this .”

D.O nodded. “But I could’ve died,” D.O said remarked. “Why did she show me the answer if she was going to kill me?”

“She expected us to save you,” Lay guessed, looking uncertain.

“How?” D.O exasperated.

“No one ing knows how,” Luhan said annoyed. “She has the wickedest mind. None of us will ever understand her.”

“Right, then what did you hear in her mind?” D.O insisted.

Luhan glared at him, knowing that D.O managed to stir the conversation where he’d have to reveal the truth.

“What did you hear Luhan?” Kai asked, completely immersed in wanting to know as well.

Lay looked intensely towards Luhan, a curious look in his gaze.

Luhan sighed, giving up. “Don’t kill me yet. You won’t be satisfied. I must save you first. Kill me then,” he said monotonously.

Kai snorted. “She wanted to save us?” he said sardonically. “ing madness.”

“Wait a minute,” D.O frowned. “Don’t kill me yet, you won’t be satisfied?”

“Yeah,” Luhan confirm dully.

Lay raised his head and looked at him intently. D.O felt like they had the same idea.

“She was a clone,” they said at the same time.

“Ah, no,” Luhan mumbled as he let his back fall to the floor, letting a small grunt as he lay on the ground. “I can’t deal with this . As if one clone wasn’t enough.”

“Are you sure?” Kai asked.

“It makes sense,” D.O said and Lay nodded. “When you attacked her, the Colonel did nothing to help her,” he said indicating to Luhan, who was still staring at the ceiling. “I thought that was strange, because, well she could’ve died and that doesn’t make sense. Why would he let her die? Unless-”

“Unless she was replaceable,” Kai finished his phrase. Lay nodded.

“We have to inform the others,” D.O said. “And we must tell them about the codes.”

“Again with the codes,” Luhan said annoyed as he sat up. “Don’t you get it? We were better off without knowing this .”

“We have to tell them,” D.O insisted again.

“We’re not telling them,” Luhan stubbornly retorted again.

“We can’t keep this to ourselves. They have the right to know,” D.O demanded.

Lay nodded silently but he looked awfully distracted, as if he wasn’t really paying attention to what he was agreeing on.

Luhan huffed annoyed and moved to sit next to Kai, resting his back against the wall. “Fine. But I’m not doing it,” he declared. “I can’t stand knowing I, that I…” he clenched his jaw. “I don’t want to see their numbers,” he said with difficulty.

“Okay,” D.O calmly agreed. “We won’t look at their codes. We’ll just tell them what we know.”

“But...” Kai faltered.

“What?” Luhan asked.

“It’s not like we've… like we've been replaced many times while being together,” Kai struggled to say. “Right Lay?”

Lay blinked and looked up curiously.

“I mean, while being out in the... during the second part of the trials. It was just me, right?” Kai asked with a weak voice as he rubbed his legs with his hands. D.O hated seeing him like that.

Lay reached for Kai’s hand and rubbed it soothingly. He tried to smile, but he couldn’t keep it.

“I’m sorry,” Lay looked at him, deep sorrow clouding his eyes. “I’m so sorry, I…,” he struggled to speak as he was on the verge of crying again. “That I couldn’t, I couldn’t-”

“It’s not your fault,” Kai said hurriedly as he pulled Lay closer so he could hug the other. “It’s not your fault, don’t you dare blame yourself,” he spoke by the other’s ear. Lay nodded silently against his shoulder.

D.O watched the scene in front. Luhan, looking uncomfortable, was fiddling with his fingers as Kai and Lay dramatically calmed down. Within instants they both looked pacified instead of the verge of breaking down again. Lay pushed away from the embrace so he could look at Kai’s face.

“It was just me, right?” Kai asked calmly, staring at the healer.

Lay pressed his lips together to refrain from speaking. Instead he quietly nodded in response.

“That’s good,” Kai smiled softly. “It's good,” he said nodding to himself in self-assurance.

“Why?” Luhan sounded angered. Kai looked at him, clearly unable to speak without struggle. Luhan’s eyes roamed his face as he read into his thoughts. “How can you be so damn positive?” Luhan mumbled as he brought his knees up to his chest and wrapped his arms around them, so he could rest his chin on his bent knees.

“What did he say?” D.O couldn’t help but feel curious and jealous from being left out.

“That our numbers rose during the first part of the trials, when we were alone,” Luhan disclosed, still looking at Kai who was drying his face. “This means that, other than Kai, every member of the group has been the same during the second trials. It’s like we haven’t… changed. The members we know have always been the same and haven’t been… replaced,” he sounded reluctant of voicing Kai’s thoughts, but D.O was grateful nonetheless.

“What… What do you mean by ‘other than Kai’?” D.O dared to ask. He knew he was missing out on something.

Both Luhan and Lay gave a cautious look towards Kai. The tan boy seemed uncomfortable but gave a knowing nod to them. Lay stood up and asked Luhan to help him carry the sleeping boys out of the room, which was quite easy using his telekinesis. They left the other two inside the room. D.O gulped hard –this was the first time he was alone with Kai after his confession. He had no idea what to expect. He stayed silent and waited for Kai to make the first move. The teleporter patted the floor next to him, where Luhan had previously sat. Without a word D.O moved to the spot and sat a little further, giving them space between them. He kept his silence as he achingly waited for Kai to gather the courage to speak.

“I…” Kai let out a deep and long sigh as he looked down at his hands. “I died during a trial.”

D.O breathed in sharply as he closed his eyes. He hated himself for asking.

“It was Lay’s first trial with the boggers.”

“Kai, you don't ha-”

“We literally just met him and Chanyeol, and they imposed a trial on us,” Kai ignored him as he continued telling his story. “His skills weren’t as developed and his energy was limited. The elixir is the main reason we became so strong,” he commented. “It’s hard for me to remember the trial, but I know it went horribly wrong. I remember a fire. Lay being exhausted. Water, a lot of ing water. And Sehun,” he paused as he breathed deeply to keep his composure. “I put my life at risk to save him, D.O. That's the kind of person I am,” Kai said with a sad smile, “I died to save him.”

“Why are you telling me this?” D.O asked holding in his tears.

“Because that's what honest people do, D.O,” Kai said dead serious as he looked at him straight in the eyes. “We tell the truth no matter how much it hurts.”

D.O felt it again; that agonizing stab to the chest. He bit his lip to stop himself from crying. He couldn’t cry now, he had no right after all he put Kai through. But his words hurt him so much, because he was right. The truth hurts and admitting you did wrong was difficult and emotionally painful, especially when you’ve hurt someone you dearly cared about.

“I'm sorry.”

Kai chuckled lowly. “I was reckless, that's not new.”

“No,” D.O held onto Kai’s arm to gain his attention. “I'm sorry,” he said again, putting all his soul into his apology. He kept his gazed fixed onto Kai, trying his best to convey his emotions through his eyes. He refrained from blinking as much as he could handle to avoid the tears from falling.

Kai was silent as he stared back at him, eyes with a glint of curiosity as he pressed his lips together to stop himself from speaking. At some point they both had turned to be able to look at each other, instead of sitting side by side.

“I owe you many apologies for what I put you through,” he struggled to keep his voice calm, “For lying and deceiving you. I, I'm sorry Kai. I wish I hadn't ever done that to you.” He didn’t feel relief by apologizing, he felt sorrowful remorse and the fact that he was silently crying made him feel worse.

Kai’s hands hovered over D.O’s face so he could carefully wipe the tears away. The touch was so caring it made him melt inside with mix feelings. He couldn’t understand how Kai could care for him again.

“Stop crying D.O,” he said warmly, “you’ve already cried enough.”

“I'm sorry,” D.O said once more as he held onto Kai’s wrists, without forcing him to stop.

“I believe you,” Kai smiled softly, brown eyes filled with kindness.

“I’m sorry,” he sniffled.

Kai hushed him as he enveloped his arms around his small frame. “It’s okay,” he said as he caressed D.O’s back. “It’s okay, don’t cry D.O. I’m not mad at you.”

D.O gulped in his sobs as he forced himself to regain composure. He held onto Kai tightly, not wanting his warmth to leave him.

“I was hurt, but I don’t hate you, D.O,” he spoke softly. “I don’t feel like I have to forgive you for what happened. I never hated you.”

“Why?”

“Because she warned me.”

“Wha-what?” he said startled, pushing Kai away far enough to look at his face.

“When I went to her office, she said don't let him break you. He'll break the others, but you must stay strong and believe in him,” Kai explained, never letting go of D.O’s hands. “I didn’t understand until yesterday. She meant you were going to break our trust.”

“I… I don’t understand,” D.O said confused.

“She even made me promise,” Kai gave a small smile. “It's like, despite all the she puts us through, she still cares for us in a wickedly twisted way.”

“Why would she care?” he asked astounded.

Kai shrugged his shoulders in response. That was a mystery neither could ever decipher.

“I… I can’t believe this,” D.O said, pulling his hands away so he could rub his tired eyes. “This morning, I swore you hated me.”

“No,” Kai chuckled. “I didn’t leave because I was mad at you. I…” His eyes slightly saddened “I left to look for something, a book I have in mind that might cheer you up.” He scratched the back of his neck sheepishly, “But I haven’t found it yet.”

“How can you be this way?”

“What?” Kai’s eyebrows raised high.

“How can you be so nice? You’re too kind,” D.O said feeling a little annoyed. Kai’s kindness made him feel bad about himself. He never thought forgiveness could feel uncomfortable.

“You never looked at me D.O.”

“What?”

“I thought about it, a lot. And I finally noticed the small details,” Kai said as he brushed his hair back.

“What do you mean?”

“Whenever you had to lie to me, you would look away first,” he said. “You’d look to the sky, the ground, to the side, anywhere but me. And if you tried to lie at my face, you’d look away again” Kai explained with a warm smile, as if he found some comfort in figuring out D.O’s lying habits. “And then there was that time we were out in the dark. We couldn’t even see our faces,” he added. “You never looked at me this way,” Kai looked at D.O. Eyes gazing into the other, trying to evoke reciprocate feelings. “You never looked at me the way you are looking at me now.”

D.O couldn’t hear his heartbeat. All he could focus on was in Kai’s dark chocolate eyes. When had he let himself fall into their affectionate gaze? He felt something akin to when he met future Kai. He was completely and irrevocably captivated by his presence; immersed into his warm gaze and unable to turn away.

Had this been caused by what he did to him? The same boy he had in front of him but much more mature.

D.O remembered it perfectly. Chocolate brown hair with highlights swept backwards, jaw squared and defined, sharpening his features with a confident aura. Same eyes, but with a more empowered and tantalizing gaze. His shoulders more prominent, body more built and muscular –yet still lean and smooth, moving elegant and lithe in such way D.O couldn’t keep his eyes off him. He remembered his hand felt rougher as he held onto the side of D.O’s face. Like the pull of a magnet, he drew their bodies closer. He remembered the smoothness of the touch of his lips, pressing onto his own. The fluttering warmth in D.O’s chest that made him lose all defenses and entrust himself into the other’s experienced movements.

Those feelings resurfaced as he observed Kai’s face. But when he looked down to those full lips, he noticed the lack of faint stubble around them –a striking reminder that the one who faced him now was not the same Kai he had kissed.

He forced himself to look away –guilt settled in his gut. He couldn’t give into his feelings now, not after all he put Kai through. Not after he kissed his older self without him knowing. Not after what future Kai told him.

D.O stood up to walk away, but in a glimpse he felt Kai’s presence shift. Once fraction of a second he was still sitting on the floor, the next he stood before him. All his senses were hyper-aware of him, that he couldn’t perceive the rest of the group in the house.

D.O looked away as Kai held onto his shoulder. He grabbed the taller boy’s wrist to shove him away, but the other didn’t budge. D.O didn’t have a chance to register how weak his muscles felt as Kai held onto his chin to force him to look at him. No words were needed between them as Kai’s gaze held more meaning. His dark eyes dared D.O to deny he was feeling the same way; the same thrill, the same nervousness, the same attraction. D.O couldn’t look away, he couldn’t deny his feelings anymore –he couldn’t even muster the strength to try pushing him away.

The spark in Kai’s eyes made him understand that he had lost the silent battle. He became aware that all his defenses had faltered. Every effort had been in vain, Kai’s presence was just too captivating. No matter how much he tried to avoid it, Kai had slowly crept into his heart.

Kai moved first but he leaned up to meet him halfway. He tilted his head when he felt their noses brush together and then closed his eyes as his lips were captured by incredible warmth. His inside sparked with thrill, his heart beating furiously against his chest as he focused on the touch of Kai’s lips upon his own.

It didn’t matter that neither knew what to do, the pressure against their lips was all they needed to feel to melt into each other’s warmth.

D.O slightly broke away so he could pucker his lips and press onto Kai’s, pushing forward to feel more of Kai against him. Kai’s hand moved from his chin to his nape, holding him closer to keep them together -his breath tickling against his skin. D.O gripped onto Kai’s shirt, as he breathed through his mouth before pressing against Kai’s lips again. Kai moved his lips, capturing D.O’s plump bottom between his full ones and pulled. D.O felt his head swoon at the feeling and began to move his lips against Kai’s, opening his mouth so he could capture more of Kai’s skin. He savored his taste, he breathed in his scent and he melted into the pleasurable pressure between their lips.

He held onto Kai’s slim waist as he pulled him closer. Kai’s warm hands held onto the sides of his face as he kept moving his lips against D.O’s; not wanting to let go of this feeling. D.O complied by daring to move his lips more vigorously and making Kai follow his lead. The taller boy was eager to match his pace. D.O never faltered as he felt himself smile; the wave of emotions he felt during the day finally drowning under the pleasure of their kiss.

They were so drawn into each other that neither heard the knock on the door nor the knob turning.

“Hey guys, lunch is…” Chanyeol loudly said as he opened the door. “Ready,” he barely said as his voice hitch up his throat.

Kai pushed D.O far enough to stand beside him. Both their faces flushed with embarrassment of being caught. Chanyeol’s eye were wide, jaw slacked as shock was evident in his face. No one spoke. The atmosphere in the room grew tense and awkward. D.O gulped nervously, as he watched Chanyeol force himself to gain some composure.

“Kai,” the redhead said with a raspy voice, making him cough to clear it out. “Kris needs your help with, umm, stealing some cars,” his voice more composed but the awkwardness still palpable.

Kai nodded before looking at D.O, his tan skin slightly flushed around the cheeks and his full lips were a brighter shade of pink. He bid a small goodbye before teleporting away –D.O felt him take Kris and Xiumin with him.

Now it was just him and Chanyeol, who stood awkwardly stiff at the door. He was looking at the floor. D.O made sure his hoodie was still covering him, before making his way to leave the room.

“Can you… Can you not tell the others?” he asked nervously. He was afraid that the others might not take this news too well, seeing how stunned Chanyeol was. Chanyeol silently nodded as he kept his gaze down. “Chanyeol?” he asked as the other still didn’t move away from blocking the entrance.

“Why him?” Chanyeol whispered.

“What?” D.O asked as he wasn’t sure he heard him correctly.

“Nothing, just…” he shook his head and finally moved away from the door. “Go eat,” he said before going into the bathroom.

D.O knew something wasn’t right but he didn’t dare find out why.

At the kitchen, Sehun was slicing a pear as he sat on Luhan’s lap. Luhan was silently resting his head on Sehun’s shoulder as he hugged him from behind. When Luhan’s eyes met his, he gave a knowing smirk and arched his brow smugly. D.O glared at him, knowing the telepathic had eavesdropped on his and Kai’s privacy.

Suho and Baekhyun sat together, mindlessly chatting as they enjoyed their meal.

“I had such a great nap,” Jongdae said as he walked up beside him towards the table.

D.O didn’t say anything as he served Jongdae and himself a bowl of, unsurprisingly, ramen. This time they added eggs and vegetables for a change.

“Thank you,” Jongdae said cheerfully and gulped down his food in seconds, without bothering to sit down. “Ah, that was good.”

“Don’t just shove it down your throat. You might get sick,” Suho nagged.

“Nah, I’m fine,” he said as he served his second bowl.

“Seriously?” Baekhyun looked baffled.

Jongdae slurped down some noodles. “I have a fast metabolism,” he excused.

“You’re going to leave us without any, you insatiable freak,” Baekhyun sarcastically joked, earning a smack on the back of his head by Suho.

D.O chuckled as Baekhyun whined, rubbing the soreness away. Jongdae resulted into mocking the other, claiming he deserved such punishment. D.O didn’t stay to watch their bickering; instead he went to check on Lay.

Lay looked dull and numbed out at the couch; he didn’t even want to eat. D.O sat next to him and offered to share his bowl but Lay shook his head.

“D.O,” he said softly. D.O looked up at him, feeling worried about Lay’s state. “I think you’re right.”

“About what?”

“We should tell them,” Lay nodded as he said those words. “I’ll help you explain it to them.”

“Are you alright?” D.O set his bowl aside and turned to face the other.

Lay looked around; making sure the rest weren’t listening. “I’m fine, it’s just…” he let out a sad smile and looked at D.O, his eyes not as dull as before, but with a hint of sadness in them. “I know Kai doesn’t blame me, but I hate knowing I failed him.”

D.O didn’t understand how he managed to smile, but he did. He smiled caringly and accepting, the way Baekhyun did earlier. He remembered the way Kai looked at him with those forgiving eyes and hoped he was looking at Lay the same way. He reached forward and held onto Lay’s hand, causing the healer to look curiously at him.

“Don’t torture yourself Lay, there’s nothing to feel remorseful of. He’s never blamed you and won’t start doing it now,” he said, remembering what Kai had said to him. “You don’t need to be forgiven because I don’t believe he ever resented you for what happened. Right?”

D.O swore he a saw a spark in Lay’s eyes, but he couldn’t observe further as he suddenly was pulled into a hug. Lay said nothing but his actions spoke for him. D.O could literally feel Lay’s thankfulness and appreciation as he shared his feelings with him. He relished on those feelings as he knew that soon, soon things would get complicated again.

“Am I interrupting something?” Tao asked as he sat next to them, by Lay’s side.

“Want a hug?” Lay offered, smiling goofily.

Tao blinked surprised. He looked around to check if they were the only ones in the living room.

“Yeah, sure,” Tao agreed with a slight shrug and wrapped his long arms around the healer.

 

They gathered at the living room an hour or more after lunch. They waited for Kris, Xiumin and Kai to return. There wasn’t much space for all of them, they moved the coffee table aside so Baekhyun and Jongdae could sit on the floor. Kai stood against the armrest of the left couch, his arms crossed in front of his chest. He was close to him for moral support. Their eyes met a few times, but neither dared to speak to each other after their kiss –there was no time for that.

Next to Kai was Sehun sitting on the couch with Suho and Xiumin. Chanyeol stood next to the coach on the right, where the rest sat. Luhan sat closest to them, he didn’t want to speak but he sat close just in case he decided to intervene. Tao sat between him and Kris, his gaze was not only as curious as the rest, but he had a hint of expectation.

Lay patted his shoulder, as if saying it’s time. He stood next to him and asked for the group to be silent. He felt the grey walls made the room feel gloomier than before. Concrete was a cold hearted bastard.

“So?” Suho asked as he looked at them.

“Is this something you didn’t mention from yesterday?” Kris asked, sounding suspicious.

“No,” he quickly replied. “No, this is something new we figured out,” he said indicating to the four of them.

Luhan glared at him.

“You too?” Sehun asked surprised.

Luhan tsked his teeth and crossed his arms, but didn’t deny it.

“It’s… It’s quite shocking and hard, but it’s something we all should know,” D.O said nervously.

“It’s not easy to talk about it,” Lay added, sounding much more tranquil than D.O. “But we’ll try our best to explain.”

“Very well,” Suho said, with an understanding gaze. “Take your time.”

D.O took a deep breath and settled his emotions. This wasn’t the first he felt exposed before the group, but this time he would have to see them and observe their reactions. He was nervous, but determined.

‘You should tell them that we’ve got to leave after this. Remember the news?’ Luhan suggested.

“Why don’t you tell them that?” he challenged.

“Tell us what Luhan?” Kris asked with eyebrows angled into suspicion.

Luhan glared at him. ‘Jerk,’ he said.

Luhan looked at the group’s curious gaze before letting out a reluctant sigh. “Whatever they have to tell you, you guys have to remember that we’ve got to leave this place today,” he told them. “When we were at the hair salon, they broadcasted the news and showed the collapsed dome. They’re investigating the place, so we’ve got to leave before they find us.”

“We almost have everything ready to leave,” Xiumin said. “I wouldn’t worry much about it, it’s a given that we’re leaving.”

“Great,” Luhan said with a hint of sarcasm, “Just wait until they tell you guys what they have to say.”

“What’s so damn important?” Kris asked, slowly losing his patience.

“Thanks for making things easier,” D.O frowned at Luhan. The telepathic shrugged casually.

“Well, what do you have to tell us?” Suho asked curious.

“We figured that Mama cloned herself,” Lay bluntly stated. The members had different reactions to his statement. “The Mama we confronted in the third trial was significantly older than the one underground and she said that we buried-”

“A newer version of herself,” Chanyeol interrupted, eyes surprised as he puzzled things together as well.

“Right,” Lay nodded. “The one underground was a younger version of herself, a new clone. And the older one was a clone as well, Luhan found out by reading her mind.”

“So we’ve never met the real one?” Kris asked baffled. They all were surprised.

“Only clones,” he confirmed. “And we…” he looked at D.O uncertain of how to continue. “We know it’s possible for her to have a clone.”

Xiumin and Kris shared a look.

“Does this have to do with, with what she said to you Luhan?” Xiumin cautiously asked.

Luhan blinked at the unexpected questioned. “It’s related,” he simply said.

“How?” Kris asked.

Luhan looked up at D.O. “You explain it.”

D.O nodded as he bit his lip. “When we escaped the facility,” D.O said seriously and everyone’s attention focused on him, “I, Mama had warned me to not wander off in the subterranean levels. I said that before.”

“Yeah,” Baekhyun spoke up. “You said you found Mama’s lab and destroyed it.”

“Right. Well,” he nervously his lips. “Her laboratory made… things,” he frowned at how bad he expressed himself. He looked over to Kai, who looked like he was cringing.

Damn this is so hard to explain.

“Well, no. Not things. Umm…” he paused to recollect his thoughts. “The boggers weren’t the only living creatures the company created,” he scratched his brow. He looked at Lay, who nodded for him to continue. “I… well, umm, the laboratory was a type of advanced incubator. There were rows with cylinder tanks and inside them were, there were humans; fully grown but young and had cables and tubes connected to their vital parts,” he depicted what he remembered. “They weren’t infants, they were our size,” he paused as his eyes roamed the group, “They were us.”

Everyone had their own way of expressing their surprise. So D.O decided to continue before the room turned into an uncontrollable ruckus.

“I didn’t want to ever tell you guys about that, but we’ve discovered something. Well, actually, Mama told me –us this.” He felt embarrassed from stammering so much. “When I argued with her, she said… when she wanted to ki- get rid of me,” he quickly rephrased his words. D.O took a deep breath and calmed himself down; he needed to be completely serious. “She said we were all replaceable while doing this,” D.O patted the back of his covered neck. “I didn’t understand why until my hair got cut a bit too much,” he looked at them, feeling their attention on him. “I have a code tattooed on the back of my head. We all have one and it’s hidden under our hairline.”

“Codes?” Tao frowned.

“Yes,” D.O confirmed. “We uncovered our codes and found a pattern to them, that umm… explains…” He looked at Kai, he was silently staring at the floor. “Our order and…” he looked at Lay for help

“The codes have the order of, of when we were… created, maybe,” Lay frowned as he struggled to explain as well. “It has the order of when we, we started the trails or at least it makes sense with the second part of the trials.”

“Yeah,” D.O affirmed.

“But they also indicate our…” Lay looked back at D.O.

Damn this part is so hard to explain.

“Kai’s code starts with a low number, which means he’s been around longer,” Lay smoothly began. “Um, and we also have an ending number that, umm… means,” Lay looked at D.O again. None seemed capable of saying it.

“Damn it! If you wanted to tell them so badly, just ing say it,” Luhan said annoyed.

“It’s not easy,” D.O gritted his teeth.

“I told you it was a bad idea,” Luhan argued.

“ing , just tell us already,” Kris angrily exasperated.

“It shows how many times we’ve died,” Kai forced out as he kept his gaze on the floor, not daring to see the group’s reaction.

“What?” Suho asked taken aback.

D.O looked at Kai, feeling between thankful and sad. “The codes have an end,” he explained as he kept his gaze on Kai. The other seemed to notice as he looked up at him with teary eyes. “And it got higher for the ones who’ve been around the longest,” he forced himself to say despite the ache in his chest.

“Since Jongdae and Baekhyun were still on the first part of the trials when we found them,” Lay continued to explain, “we thought that they could have the lowest ending code. We confirmed our theory by checking their codes and they turned out to be number ones. Which means they are the first of… their kind, I don’t know how else to say it,” Lay looked back at him.

Jongdae and Baekhyun looked surprised and checked each other’s necks, only to find newly grown hair.

“In the incubating laboratory they had the follow up lot, replacements waiting to be used once one of us…” D.O lost his words as he looked at Kai –now D.O was the one to start tearing up. Kai nodded at him, as if he wanted him to continue but D.O shook his head.

Kai stood and wrapped an arm around his waist, pulling him close to his face. “It’s alright, you can tell them about mine,” Kai whispered at his ear. But he shook his head, he couldn’t do that. “It will help them understand. I trust you.”

D.O bit his lip not wanting to concede, but the determined look in Kai’s eyes made him oblige. He nodded and looked back at the group. “We all have a number,” he said as clear as possible, “I’m a two which means I’m not the first me, but the second. I died during my first trials and got replaced once,” he struggled to say as tears began to fall. “While Kai, Kai… he is a five,” his voice broke at the end. He breathed deeply and felt Kai’s arms hold him securely.

Everyone in the room stared shocked, eyes wide and jaws would either fall open or shut tight. They all reacted differently, but they were mostly silent. Sehun bit his lower lip, his eyes were teary. Suho looked like he was going to be sick. Xiumin face was tense as tears slowly fell. Chanyeol looked angered rather than sad. Kris eyebrows furrowed deeply as he tried to comfort Tao, who was crying in Kris’s arms. Luhan was serious. Jongdae’s jaw clenched and unclenched as he visibly gulped. Baekhyun hid his face with his hands and dark purple hair.

“This is a ing déjà vu,” Tao cried out, “This is what I couldn’t figure out. This ! This… I can’t,” he cupped his mouth as he began to sob. Kris held him tighter trying his best to console him.

“But you wrecked the lab,” Suho reasoned. “What happened to the… clones?” his face contorted in an unhandsome way, worry overpowering his gaze.

D.O forcefully gulped, his throat felt dry and hoarse. “I, umm…,” he paused as he furiously wiped his tears away. “I lost control when I found the others, when I saw many of you guys sleeping in incubators,” his eyes stung. His voice wasn’t helping either. “I went berserk. I couldn’t let them ever replace us. There could only be one of us. And I, I…” he smiled weakly a mournful smile. It was clear to the rest what he had done. “If it wasn’t for Kai and Lay that day, I think I would’ve never been able to get back to my senses,” he said looking at them. Lay just gave him a knowing look, while Kai smiled softly.

“When…” Xiumin began but fell quite. He looked troubled as he wiped the few tears left. Suho nudged him and made him ask. “When Kai…” he looked directly at Lay with red eyes. “During that trial, he died didn’t he? That’s why they wouldn’t let us near him, right?”

“I…” Lay looked distraught as lowered his gaze –giving away the answer with his reaction. He gulped hard and looked back up to give a proper response. “I was able to help Kai, but I knew his state was too… critical,” he looked back to the floor. “I couldn’t save him,” he said solemnly. “I had my suspicions too. When he came back I felt he wasn’t the same,” he looked at Kai with repentant eyes, “We all felt his personality changed a bit, but I felt his body wasn’t the same.” He breathed deep, “I noticed during the night trial that he didn’t have any previous scars. The first time we met, I didn’t heal a small cut on his right arm so I knew there was supposed to be a scar there. Then I used my ability to look through his body and he didn’t have the scars from the trial were we lost him. He still doesn’t have them,” he sighed and looked back at Kai. Kai had his head down, while he bit his lip. They already discussed this with Kai, but it was still a hard truth to hear. “I chose to believe the company had methods to rejuvenate a person’s body or to erase scars, because I never let myself believe that he wasn’t the same Kai,” Lay admitted calmly.

Sehun began to cry. Wind gusted around him, pushing away Suho, Xiumin and Baekhyun. He harshly stood and walked towards the kitchen. Kai left D.O’s side to catch the other boy and calm him. Kai hugged Sehun right at the entrance of the living room, stopping him from running away. Sehun gripped Kai’s back and broke into loud sobs.

Luhan stood looking towards them, but didn’t move.

“It’s all my fault! It’s all my fault,” Sehun cried out.

“No, Sehun stop,” Kai held onto him tighter as the wind kept hitting his face. “Don’t ing blame yourself. Sehun stop!”

He did. The wind died down but he couldn’t stop crying. He fell to his knees, dragging Kai down with him. Kai never stopped holding him as Sehun sobbed against his chest.

 

“I don’t understand something,” Baekhyun began to speak, “I get that she knew you guys had seen her lab and found out about the clones, but… How… I mean,” he scratched his head as he tried to make sense. “Why the hell did she tell you?” he said pointing at D.O. “She wanted you dead. It doesn’t make sense,” he furrowed his brows.

Instead of replying immediately, he was impressed that Baekhyun turned out to be so clever and asked the same thing he has thought before.

“I know it doesn’t make sense,” D.O admitted, his voice much more stable. “I think she expected Kai or Lay to figure it out.”

“But she was speaking to you. You guys were arguing and that’s when she said it,” Baekhyun pointed out. “You worked with her, kind of. She must’ve known you’d pick up the hint. We were all there, but I never thought twice about it.”

“She wanted me dead,” D.O flatly said. “I’m sure she must have expected Lay or Kai to figure it out. Maybe no one would, but she wouldn’t just tell us. She would only give the hint. It’s up to us to figure out the truth,” he explained what he believed.

“Yeah,” Baekhyun agreed. “She’s cryptic as .”

“But D.O, she said she could replace you,” Xiumin reminded. “Doesn’t that mean that she, that she has…”

“I don’t know if she was lying or not, but Xiumin please I don’t want to think about it,” D.O countered. Xiumin nodded understanding.

“She has what?” Jongdae asked curious, Baekhyun nudged him to shut up. “Ouch!” he complained as he rubbed his side. “Sorry I asked. I just was curious to know if he meant a clone -oh ,” he covered his mouth.

Baekhyun rolled his eyes at him. “Idiot,” he muttered. Jongdae glared at him.

“Guys don’t start a stupid fight,” Xiumin coldly warned.

“This explains why we have the same memories,” Kris thought out, still cradling Tao in his arms. The time controller was calm, but still stricken. “They probably planted the memories during the… creation process,” he said acridly.

“We think so too,” Lay answered. “If we weren’t born normally, and we are in fact just… clones. Even if we had a normal life before, but then, at some point during the trials, we were… replaced. Then they probably implanted these fake memories to give us a sense of a past,” Lay tried to explain.

“A fabricated childhood linked to Mama,” Suho reasoned. “That’s why we all felt like we belonged down there at first.”

“Yeah,” Lay agreed.

“I think, when future Kai talked to me, he said that we had to confront the trial to learn the truth,” D.O added. “I think he meant this. That we’d find out that we were never normal and why we all have the same memories.”

“Don’t forget that Mama’s a freaking clone as well,” Luhan added resentfully.

“Wait a minute,” Xiumin said and looked horrified for a second. “Luhan, when you woke up at the ICU and you couldn’t remember anything like Kai. Did they… you don’t think they could’ve…”

Luhan visibly stiffened. His eyes widened in shock as he realized what Xiumin meant.

“Oh ,” Xiumin gasped as he cupped his mouth to shut up.

Xiumin walked up to him but couldn’t get close as Luhan began to have a fit. He kneeled to the floor and held his head between his hands. Tao and Kris were pushed off the couch as Jongdae and Baekhyun shoved away towards the opposite side.

“Luhan, please calm down,” Xiumin pleaded. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.”

‘Xiumin, I’m a two,’ D.O heard Luhan in his mind.

“Oh no,” Xiumin looked perplexed.

The couches began to levitate. The chandelier above began to shake. Lay held onto D.O as they cornered away with Baekhyun and Jongdae. Luhan was losing it.

“Sehun!” Suho called out.

Sehun reappeared with Kai in the living room. He wiped his tear stained face as he created an air armor and effortlessly fought against Luhan’s force field. He knelt in front of Luhan and pulled him into a hug. Luhan relaxed and desperately hugged him back, the psychic field disappeared and the couches fell back into place. Luhan was crying silent chokes as he hid his head against Sehun’s chest. Xiumin looked devastated and regretful for speaking out his thoughts.

D.O felt guilt as well. It was him who caused all of this mess. He insisted in finding out the truth, he insisted on telling everyone else. Luhan was right, they were better off without knowing all this . His friends wouldn’t have gone through all this emotional pain if it weren’t for him.

Ignoring the scene Chanyeol suddenly walked up to D.O, his angered expression frightened the smaller boy. He grabbed D.O’s shoulders and roughly spun him around, and pulled his hood down. D.O felt a strong hold on his nape.

“D0.K500-2,” he read loud enough for only them to hear.

D.O endured the uncomfortable hold on his neck. He suspected that Chanyeol hadn’t realized how hard he was gripping him, but he waited for the other to let go instead of trying to push him away.

“Why do you have a D-zero instead of a number?” he questioned.

“I don’t know,” he said clenching his jaw. His code was yet another mystery. “It’s supposed to be one-zero. I’m supposed to be the tenth.”

“What’s mine?” Chanyeol asked as he finally let go. “I want to know mine.”

“No, no please don’t.” D.O looked at him and then at the rest, who were still startled by Luhan’s outburst. “I think it’s best if you guys don’t ask to know your codes.”

“Bull,” D.O looked shocked towards Suho, he was the last person he expected to say that. “I want to know, it’s my right to know.”

“But...”

“Damn it D.O! I was the first one out,” he said frustrated. “I want to know, I need to know how many times those bastards made me.”

“Okay,” Lay agreed.

“No, Lay don’t,” D.O said catching him by the elbow, stopping him from walking to the other. “We said we wouldn’t look at their codes,” he reminded.

“I know,” Lay said looking back at him in the eyes. “But he has the right to know,” he said serious and shrugged his arm away.

D.O stood shocked –not only because of Lay’s defiance, but because of that spur of fear he felt before rekindled inside as Lay effortlessly broke away from his hold. He wasn’t strong enough to keep him from leaving.

Lay rubbed the back of Suho’s nape, above the hairline and hair began to fall. He did the reverse procedure to making hair grow out. Lay’s eyes widened as he looked at Suho’s code. Then he looked away sadden, quickly forcing hair to grow back.

“Well? What does it say?” Suho asked, voice faltered a little at the end

“1.5UH0,” Lay recited. “It spells out your name, Suho.”

“Damn it Lay, tell me the whole code,” Suho looked between a mixture of irritation, worry and fear.

Lay bit his lower lip as he looked at Suho’s eyes. “1.5UH0-6,” he said.

“6,” Suho repeated, “I’m a six.” He breathing hitched and he plopped down on the couch, eyes focused on the floor. Everyone’s attention was on him now; even Luhan and Sehun were looking at him, sniffling every now and then. “That means I, I’ve died five… five times,” he struggled to believe.

Lay and Xiumin brought it upon themselves to try to comfort him. Kai soon joined them as well.

“You won’t reveal any other code, understood?” Xiumin coldly reprimanded Lay.

The healer silently nodded in agreement as he kept rubbing Suho’s back. D.O was amazed that he wasn’t crying, but he worried about his state of mind. He really hated himself at this moment. But what he hated most was that she told him this. If it wasn’t because of her tricks and games he wouldn’t ever insisted in figuring out the damn truth.

D.O felt a hot pressure against his shoulder. He looked up knowing who it was, but still felt surprised as Chanyeol’s hard gaze showed anger and hurt.

“Is this want you wanted?” Chanyeol asked displeased. His tone achingly jabbed his chest –he couldn’t bear with the guilt anymore. Just with looking at Chanyeol’s disappointed face D.O began to cry.

“I’m sorry. I just keep ing up, don’t I?” he asked through tears.

Chanyeol never replied.

 

 

---

A/N: 10.  It's kind of an angsty open ending, but whatever, I felt it was enough.

You guys should be making the same questions the boys ask. There are still things to figure out, and you shouldn’t rule out Mama yet –there’s still more to her complex self.

And yes, I changed the forward and added a new cover, because Lucky One feels okay. the tree, I'd rather see them locked up in a laboratory, jk.

Thanks to justhanafiction, allybabe747, chainedearth, dreamer94, kpop_trash_, JaniceHan, os_yehet, Anis_cmn, VitaminFangirl, Dotsssss, milt-tv, kawaii_natt, kpopandanimelover, appelpie and Toyoto for subscribing. I can’t believe there’s more than 150.  

Anyway, have a great weekend guys and sorry for any grammar mistakes. I’ve looked through some older chapters and found that there are still mistakes I haven’t spotted. It’s kind of hard to edit this on my own, because I’m too eager to update and I keep skipping details. But, when I’m done with updating I’ll try to edit it all. Maybe, haha.

Annyeong!

-Blackie.