Sehun got in his car and drove. He ploughed through the deep snow and made it onto the cleared country road through the forest. He pulled the crumpled address from his pocket and peered at it. He knew where Xiumin was.

Thoughts flew through his mind as drove. He should have given the letter sooner – Luhan must hate him for keeping it from him. What must Xiumin think of him? He must hate him too for being so horrible. What if Xiumin shuts the door in his face and doesn’t want to see him? He couldn’t let that happen. For Luhan’s sake he had to talk to him and get him to return.

Luhan.

He had really let him down this time. There was nothing he could do to undo what he had done. Even if he brought Xiumin back and Luhan didn’t hate him for his mistakes, he still knew that he would never have Luhan’s heart. That belonged to Xiumin – he knew that now. He was in agony, as he knew he couldn’t win. However, getting Xiumin back was the right thing to do so he put his foot to the floor and sped on down the road.

~~~~~~~~

The flat in which Xiumin was staying was easy to find. He parked his car nearby and went inside. He looked at the address again. Number 5. Number 5 was on the second floor, so he went up the stairs and stood in front of the door. He paused before knocking and waited patiently until the door was answered.

The man who opened it was not Xiumin – he asked, ‘Can I help you?’

‘Oh hi, is Xiumin here?’ Sehun replied.

The man looked surprised and said, ‘Are you Luhan?’

‘No, my name is Sehun – I really need to speak to Xiumin, it is about Luhan.’

‘Okay,’ the stranger said, ‘My name is Chen.’

Chen stuck out his hand, which Sehun took and shook gently.

‘Come in,’ Chen said and he stepped back to let Sehun in.

~~~~~~~

Xiumin looked at his watch, it showed the date – it had been a week since he left the forest. He sighed and looked out of the window again. He had spent the day sitting in front of it again – like he did every day. Jenny kindly brought him regular cups of tea when she was in the house but that was the only time he spoke to anyone. Unless Chen asked him to do something, he didn’t move. He didn’t cry, he didn’t speak; he just stared out of the window onto the street below. It was a quiet street, cars hardly ever drove down it and he enjoyed its silence. The occasional rustle of the leaves or the rush of a car that went past was calming and meant that he didn’t have to think about all of the things on his mind. He was able to put Luhan to one side and clear his head. It was never long before another memory of Luhan rushed in and stole his heart again. But, as if the thoughts were balloons, he let them go and watched them fly off out of the window and into the sky above the street.

He had found a way to cope. It wasn’t perfect but he could get by. He let the balloons of his memories fly into the air and his thoughts of Luhan were no longer painful. Movement in the street caught his attention and he glanced down at a car that arrived. A figure got out and walked towards the door of the flat. He couldn’t make out whom it was, but his first guess was enough to pop all of the balloons floating into the sky. As if they were the plastics remains of burst balloons falling back to earth, the thoughts rushed back into his head, like he had never let them go.

Luhan? It couldn’t be. Had he come to see him? He couldn’t have.

He heard Chen go to the door and listened intently to the muffled voices. He could then hear footsteps and Chen opened his door, ‘Xiumin,’ he said, ‘there is someone here to see you – he says his name is Sehun.’

 ~~~~~~~~~~~

Xiumin walked into the kitchen to see Sehun sat at the table and Jenny who was making tea. He went over to the empty chair opposite Sehun and sat in it. Jenny could sense the tension in the room and was therefore cautious as she brought two cups to the table. She smiled at Xiumin nevertheless and he thanked her. She then went, leaving them alone to talk together. Xiumin looked up at Sehun’s face. He seemed tired and looked even moodier than usual – if that was even possible. However, this time his moodiness seemed to have a purpose.

Sehun was the first to speak, ‘Xiumin,’ he began, ‘before I tell you what is needed to be told, I want you to know that I am sorry. I know that you must despise me for how horrible I was to you and I know that no amount of apologies will ever be enough but I am sorry nevertheless. I was purposely ignoring you but…’ He paused, clearly pained by what he had to say, ‘But I was doing it out of jealousy. It is a pathetic excuse, I know, but it is the honest truth. Luhan would not stop talking about how amazing you are and I am simply bitterly jealous of you.’

Sehun paused, and looked up at Xiumin, meeting his eyes. He continued, ‘so, that morning when you dropped your letter round before leaving, I took it. I didn’t read it, I can promise you that, but I kept it from Luhan in the hope that he wouldn’t see it and run after you. It is the biggest mistake of my life – I should have taken it to him straight away but I guess it is done now. It wasn’t until this morning, when he said something to change my mind, that I gave it to him.’

Xiumin sat in complete silence, engrossed in Sehun’s story. Sehun broke their eye contact and stared morbidly into his tea, ‘He, he told me that he loves you.’

Xiumin’s eyes widened and began to water. He remained in total silence as he absorbed the shock and Sehun still continued, ‘I knew then that no matter what I did, Luhan would never look at me the same way he looks at you and that was why I gave him the letter. I tore off the address and came straight here to find you and bring you home, because Luhan needs you. I had to put things right and fix what I had done because I can’t bear to see Luhan upset any longer, it is worse than seeing him with you. I would rather let him be happy than see him suffer.’

Sehun looked at Xiumin again and waited. Xiumin stared back at him, still wide-eyed. Sehun spoke again, ‘For God’s sake Xiumin, say something! I can’t bear your silence anymore!’ Sehun frowned at him desperately.

Xiumin’s face relaxed and he took a breath, ‘I don’t hate you, Sehun.’

Sehun blinked at him, ‘you don’t?’

‘No, I could never hate you because I know how it feels. I know what it is like to love Luhan and to see him slip through your fingers into the hands of someone else – or at least that was what it seemed like at the time. My way of dealing with my problems is to run away from them, so I did.’

He sighed, completely calm, ‘Luhan will forgive you, and you cannot continue to blame yourself either. You did the right thing coming to find me, you fixed your mistakes.’

‘I did?’ Sehun said, his voice barely a whisper.

‘Yes! You are not a bad person, so do not blame yourself anymore.’

‘I’m not?’ A tear glided silently down Sehun’s cheek, ‘Thank you Xiumin – it means a lot to hear you say that.’

Xiumin smiled.

Sehun wiped his face, ‘Let’s get you to Luhan, yeah?’

~~~~~~~~

Xiumin thanked Chen for the millionth time as he swung his backpack over his shoulder and followed Sehun out the door. Chen put a hand on his arm just as he went through the doorway, stopping him.

‘Promise me that you will write to us more.’ Chen said softly.

‘I promise!’ Xiumin replied.

Chen pulled him into a hug before letting him go. Xiumin nodded politely to Jenny, ‘Thank you Jenny, for the teas and the dinners and your hospitality.’

Jenny smiled at him, ‘It is no problem at all; you know you are welcome anytime! I hope you manage to sort everything, you must remember to write to us – let us know how it turns out!’

‘Of course.’ Xiumin smiled.

Sehun started the engine and Xiumin got into the car, waving as they drove off.

He was going back to Luhan. He was going home.