When Jongdae returned it was far past midnight, but Minseok was still up. He was sitting on his bed, reading a book and he looked up when the other entered the room as if he had been waiting for him.

“How did it go?”, Minseok asked and eyed him shortly. Jongdae smiled brightly and walked over to his bed while pulling his shirt over his head.

“Good… really good”, he said. “Did you stay awake in case I’d return and tell you it was a complete disaster?”, he added and turned around.

Minseok raised one eyebrow. “Haha, don’t think too high of yourself. I was actually reading”, he said and held up his book. Jongdae gave him a look that was hard to read, but Minseok just looked back.

“Alright. I’ll take a shower, I’m so tired”, Jongdae finally said.

“What? That’s it? You’re not going to tell me all the juicy details?”, Minseok asked and closed his book. Jongdae opened his mouth and stared at him, then he burst into laughter.

“Idiot”, he laughed and left for the bathroom. Minseok heard how he locked the door, which was very unusual for Jongdae. He never locked the door and Minseok had run into Jongdae showering multiple times. But maybe that was the reason?

Minseok shook his head. He turned the book in his hand while listening to the sound of the water rushing in the shower. When Jongdae returned from the shower, he was already dressed and Minseok couldn’t push away the thought anymore that Jongdae was trying so hard not to give Minseok even the slightest chance or idea to sleep with him again.

Minseok put the book away and grabbed his mobile, while he pretended to type something, he watched Jongdae out of the corner of his eyes. Jongdae was texting obviously with the girl he had met and he was smiling; this special Jongdae-smile, where his lips curled up in a sweet way and somehow had always reminded Minseok of a cat.

“Good night”, Jongdae said as he put away his mobile and slid under his blanket. Minseok didn’t look up. “Uh-huh”, he made while he actually read a text message by Zitao:

“Do you still have that reflex camera?”

Minseok frowned. Why would Zitao need that camera?

“Yeah, I do. Why?”, he typed back.

“Looks like you found someone as well, but you don’t tell me because I keep the juicy details to myself?”, Jongdae said.

Minseok blinked and looked up. “What?”, he asked.

“You’re texting someone… you’ve found someone as well? But you don’t want to tell me because you feel offended since I keep all the juicy details to myself?”, Jongdae repeated.

Minseok laughed. “Oh I’m not offended”, he said and shrugged. Jongdae frowned. “So there’s someone?”, he asked. Minseok smiled.

“No… not at all. I’m texting Zitao”, he said honestly.

Jongdae opened his mouth. “Oh”.

“Good night then”, he added and lay down with his back turned to Minseok. Minseok watched Jongdae’s body’s outline rising and falling until his mobile vibrated and brought his attention back to another text message by Zitao.

“Can I borrow it?”, Zitao wrote.

Minseok hesitated.

“Have you found a new hobby of taking pictures?”, he wrote back.

“Sort of”, Zitao wrote back.

“I don’t have it with me…”, Minseok finally wrote back and put his mobile down.

He threw one last glance towards Jongdae and then pulled the sheets over his shoulders. He wondered what Zitao was up to now and why it bothered him so much that Jongdae had put him onto such a distance.

***

When Luhan woke up the next day, his face was nuzzled into someone’s chest and an arm was wrapped around him. Luhan shifted carefully not to wake up the other one and rubbed his eyes. It took a while until he remembered why Sehun was lying next to him. He sat up and wanted to suppress a scream, but a tortured whimper had escaped his mouth. A sudden pain had twitched through his lower back and his legs felt heavy.

Sehun stirred and finally opened his eyes. Luhan groaned and lay back down.

“What the hell?”, he whined and bit his lip. Sehun gently touched his shoulder. “It’ll go away in a few hours… just stay in bed. I’ll make you breakfast”, he said.

Luhan turned his head and as he didn’t know what to say, he just looked into Sehun’s eyes. Sehun chuckled.

“Good morning”, he added as he got up.

But Luhan grabbed Sehun’s arm and pulled him back. “Hey… uh, I know that’s really… uhm…”, Luhan stuttered. Sehun smiled.

“No need to feel awkward”, Sehun said and Luhan’s cheek. Luhan felt horrible as he looked away.

“No actually… I don’t… want the others to know”, he said slowly. “What don’t you want them to know?”, Sehun asked carefully.

Luhan bit his lip. “What happened yesterday… basically everything”, Luhan said with a heavy voice. Sehun didn’t say anything and when Luhan quickly dared a glance at him, Sehun sighed.

“That basically means you tried it with me, but you don’t want it… or you don’t like it and we end it here?”, Sehun said. His voice was calm, but Luhan could see that he was hurt.

Luhan quickly shook his head. “No, that’s not what I meant. It was beautiful and I-I really liked it… uh.. It’s just… I’m not ready for this…”, Luhan said hesitant. Sehun got up, he breathed out slowly.

“That’s just a nicer way to express what I said”, he murmured. “Sehun”, Luhan begged.

Sehun put on a smile, but Luhan knew that Sehun wasn’t okay and it made it worse that Sehun was good at concealing his real feelings, because he had to hide them so often before.

 “I’m sorry”, Luhan whispered. Sehun nodded and turned around. “I’ll bring you your breakfast”, he said quietly and closed the door behind him.

Luhan lay back and buried his face in the pillow as he couldn’t hold back the tears anymore. When Sehun returned, his tears had dried and he was lying on his side staring at the wall.

All long he had been denying his feelings for Sehun and when he had finally given in, it had felt so good… so right. But once he had had time to think about it, he again had pushed Sehun away and he felt like he had made a mistake that he was going to regret. It sounded so stupid; he wasn’t into boys, whenever he gave it a serious thought, he definitely preferred girls… however when Sehun sat down next to him and placed a full tray onto the bed, something inside him burned up.

Luhan sat up and took the tray. “Thanks”, he murmured. His back wasn’t hurting that much anymore and he could sit. Sehun got up. “Well then… enjoy your meal”, he murmured.

Luhan shoved the tray onto the bedside table and pulled Sehun back to the bed. Sehun looked confused when Luhan took Sehun’s arms and wrapped them around himself.

“I wished I could have been born into a world not as messed up as this one and maybe then I could have given you something….”, Luhan started, but was cut off when Sehun kissed him.

“What are you even talking about?”, Sehun whispered against his lips. Luhan tilted his head and kissed Sehun back instead of telling him how much he actually wanted him.

Sehun cupped his face, Luhan felt how his long slim fingers through his hair and they shifted into a more comfortable position. Sehun’s other hand searched for Luhan’s and he interlocked their fingers just as he carefully pulled away. He rested their foreheads against each other and both sat there in silence with closed eyes. Sehun prayed that this morning would never end, because then he didn’t know where to go and what to do. Luhan wished he hadn’t said what he had said, but he didn’t have the courage to take back his words and hoped that Sehun would just stay one more second, just one more. When Sehun let go of Luhan, he opened his eyes and got lost in the calm brown eyes. Calm and unreadable.

There were 2 days left of their vacation and then everything that had happened here would be nothing than a bittersweet memory, because that’s what happens with summer holiday romances.

Sehun held Luhan’s face, his thumb his cheeks gently and just looked him in the eyes for a moment. Then he kissed him and got up, he was already out of the room, when Luhan jumped to his feet and ran after him.

He caught up to Sehun in the hallway close to the stairs and grabbed his arm to turn him around. They didn’t kiss, but there was a slight smile on Sehun’s lips… “Don’t go”.

They spent the afternoon in the living room as it started raining. Chanyeol had brought the girl he had gone out for dinner and Junmyeon was definitely now dating the girl that had been stuck with him as if she had been glued to him.

The friends and couples were all snuggled up on the large sofa in the living room. Luhan was leaning a bit insecure against Sehun’s broad shoulders and no one commented on Sehun’s arm that was put around Luhan’s shoulder. The TV was on with a music sender that played soft and calm – probably very romantic – music.

Zitao and Baekhyun had gone out to a shopping trip, Jongdae had left around noon to meet that girl again.  But Zitao and Baekhyun were back rather quickly, because of the rain or because they had found what they had been looking for – they didn’t tell. They greeted everyone when they returned, but immediately went upstairs.

“Have you thought about what I told you?”, Zitao asked as he closed the door behind them. Baekhyun pulled up his shoulders. “Hm?”, he murmured as he watched how Zitao pulled out a box from the shopping bag.

“About dating boys instead of girls to… distract yourself from Chanyeol”, Zitao said quietly and sat down next to Baekhyun.

Baekhyun shook his head. “There is no one in my interest…”, he murmured and rubbed his temples. “Let’s open it”, he added and pointed at the box. Zitao looked at the box in his hands.

“Are you going to tell me what you need it for?”, Baekhyun asked finally. Zitao looked up and raised one eyebrow. “What do you think?”

There was a slight smile on Baekhyun’s face.

“How about Yixing?”, Zitao said as he started opening the box. Baekhyun frowned. “Yixing’s not gay”, he murmured. Zitao shook his head.

“No, rather panual”, he murmured then he looked up. And Baekhyun laughed. “But he’s too nice”, Baekhyun said and sighed. Zitao bit his lip.

“What’s the problem with that? It appears we all only fall for s, so why is it wrong to date a nice guy once in a while?”, Zitao asked. Baekhyun looked tired as he shook his head.

“Thanks for trying to help me”, he said and put a hand on Zitao’s leg. They were quiet for a while, then Baekhyun turned his head.

“If I asked Yixing, he would probably make out with me immediately, just because he didn’t want to hurt me… but that’s not what I want. I would only feel guilty afterwards as if I had betrayed Chanyeol. How stupid, huh? I want to be faithful to someone who doesn’t want me and… besides it’s never good to date within a group of friends. I told you, I wanted to keep it a secret”, Baekhyun said.

Zitao nodded. “Right…”

Zitao hesitated. “Can you send Sehun upstairs to me?”, he asked.

Baekhyun pouted. “You’ll entrust him with your plans?”, he asked. Zitao smiled faintly. “Sorry, Baek. I’ll tell you when… it’s finished”, he said.

Baekhyun sighed and got up.

Everyone was so lazy that most of them were half asleep and Sehun was just wondering if he could quickly steal a kiss from Luhan, when Baekhyun came into the living room.

“Sehun…”, he called quietly. “Tao needs you”. Sehun and Luhan both tensed up and exchanged a worried gaze, but Baekhyun quickly shook his head.

“Everything’s fine, he just wanted to show you something, I think…”, Baekhyun said. Sehun held back the urge to kiss Luhan and got up to check on Zitao.

Sehun had just left the living room, when the living room door was pushed open suddenly. There was the sound of clicking high heels and someone said:

“Oh my god”.

Everyone stared at the stunning young woman entering the living room, she wore tight jeans that flattered her long lean legs. Her light brown hair fell down over her shoulders and glowed in the dim light. “Isn’t that the model who won the latest newcomer award?”, Jia whispered.

“Xin”, Luhan said. His face was as white as the wall behind him.

“I thought I would find you here, you still come here every summer then”, she said and laughed.

She threw her hair over her shoulder and walked over to the sofa. She then grabbed Luhan by the arm and pulled him onto his feet. Before anyone say something, Xin pulled Luhan closer and kissed him fully on the lips. Jia’s mouth fell open, Minseok said something like: “Good gracious”

Luhan shoved Xin back. “What are you doing here?”, he called.

“Oh you see, I have a little break and I thought I might visit my boyfriend”, she laughed and pinched his cheek. “How about a walk at the beach? We have to tell each other lots, right?”, she said.

She linked her arm with Luhan’s and turned around to drag Luhan towards the terrace door. But when they turned around Luhan only saw Sehun standing in the door with an unbelieving expression in his eyes. Before Luhan could say something Xin had pulled him outside.

“Her boyfriend? HER BOYFRIEND?”, Jia screeched and jumped onto her feet.

“Luhan is in a relationship with this… that model?”, Jia called and pointed at the door Xin had just closed behind them. The boys exchanged uncomfortable gazes.

Sehun bit his lip and turned around, he quickly made his way back upstairs before someone could see his tears.

“No, she’s his ex-girlfriend”, Junmyeon finally explained. “They broke up a few months ago, because she was too busy and got quite famous”.

Jia was boiling with indignation. “Yeah, but… but what is the meaning of this then?”, she called.

“Looks like she wants him back?”, Minseok carefully suggested. Jia growled and crossed her arms, her entire body was shaking. Minji patted her shoulders sympathetically.

 And Minseok seemed to be right, because Xin stayed for the night and didn’t seem like she intended to leave soon. Wherever Luhan was, Xin was there too and made everyone feel extremely superfluous and unwanted.

“Why is he letting her stay if he actually doesn’t even want to be with her anymore?”, Jia asked when Xin and Luhan disappeared into the kitchen.

She had her arms crossed and was chewing on her lips. Chanyeol shrugged. “He was devastated when they broke up, one of the reasons why the thing with Tao… you know”, Chanyeol stopped and looked at the others.

Minseok raised his eyebrows. Zitao knew Xin as well and avoided coming downstairs if not absolutely necessary and so did Sehun.

“It was around the same time when they broke up and the thing with Zitao happened, that’s why probably no one really noticed what was going on with Zitao”, Jongdae explained. The girl he was dating since a few days now was sitting next to him with big eyes.

He turned around and smiled at her. “That’s not the nicest stuff to talk about… nothing for your ears”, he said and gently touched her cheek.

“How about a walk then?”, Baekhyun suggested. “It’s very romantic on the beach”, he added. Jongdae frowned at Baekhyun’s cool tone, but nodded and grabbed the girl’s hand.

“Yeah, let’s do that, all right?”, he said and the shy girl smiled and agreed.

As soon as Jongdae and the girl had left, Baekhyun took the spot they had occupied. He stretched his legs and leaned onto Minseok’s shoulder.

“What? I felt like vomiting just by watching them”, Baekhyun said and shrugged. Chanyeol laughed, but his new girlfriend furrowed her eyebrows.

“What are you guys laughing about?”

The entire atmosphere tensed up when Xin and Luhan came back into the living room.

“Nothing, nothing”, Minseok murmured.

“Anyways”, Xin said and she beamed at them. “Great news”, she continued and pulled Luhan closer, who didn’t look like there was any good news.

“Since you have a hard year coming up, you’re going to graduate, right, what do you think about staying on week longer? Luhan just asked his parents and they agreed on letting us stay one week longer! Isn’t that fantastic? I think I know most of you, but it’s been a while and it would be wonderful to get to know you all better”, she said and laughed throaty.

“Uh”, Minseok murmured. “Well, actually I-I got stuff to do”, he started and looked at the others who had blank expression on their faces.

Luhan’s eyes were speaking volumes, begging them to not let him alone with her.

“One week longer? What a… uh… nice idea”, Chanyeol finally said and cleared his throat. Baekhyun had dived into the pillows to suppress his laughter and Jia was fuming while she tried to smile which resulted in a very odd grimace.

Minseok boxed Baekhyun in the sides, when Sehun and Tao suddenly hurried through the living room.

“Hey, where are you going?”, Baekhyun called as he sat up.

Zitao shortly turned around. “No, worries we’ve got something to do… we’ll be back for dinner”, he said and grabbed Sehun’s arm to pull him along. Sehun shortly looked at Luhan and then turned back around.

And this time the two were indeed back for dinner, they sat together in the corner of the living room, talking quietly and stopped as soon as someone approached them.

“What are you staring at, Luhan?”, Xin chirped and patted his arm. “I’m talking to you”, she added.

Minseok noticed how Luhan’s eyes constantly moved back to Tao and Sehun sitting in the corner and how his eyebrows slightly furrowed while he tried to smile at Xin.

“That’s not important, Sehun. I just need something to show them and as soon as I’m in there, I can-“, Zitao whispered but quickly interrupted himself when Baekhyun came toward them.

“You still won’t let me in on your plan?”, Baekhyun asked and shoved his chin forward. Zitao shook his head. “I told you I would show you the results”, Zitao said with a short smile.

Baekhyun eyed Sehun. “Are you doing this also for the purpose of making Luhan jealous?”, Baekhyun asked. Sehun frowned.

“As if he cared… He’s back together with Xin, the girl he loves. End of story”, Sehun said simply. Baekhyun raised his eyebrows.

“I don’t think they’re really back together, Luhan doesn’t look all too happy that she’s here”, Baekhyun said. Sehun shrugged.

“Zitao told me about them. It must have been painful to see his ex and it must be painful to his ears to hear her voice all day long as well. Maybe that’s the reason for his face”, Sehun said and shoved a big portion of meat into his mouth. Baekhyun had to sit down because he laughed so hard.

“Her voice is really a bit unpleasant...”, Zitao commented. “A bit unpleasant?”, Baekhyun repeated. Zitao rolled his eyes. Baekhyun shook his head.

“We all don’t know why Luhan let’s her stay, but you see, your plan works perfectly fine”, Baekhyun said and got up.

“What plan?”, Sehun asked and put his bowl down.

“Luhan is going crazy with jealousy and you just spend one day together without telling him what you’re doing. Maybe you should hold hands and kiss and he’ll explode”, Baekhyun said.

Zitao puckered up his lips. “Maybe you should make out with Sehun, you were looking for a boyfriend, weren’t you?”, he said sharply.

Baekhyun flinched and opened his mouth, but Sehun shook his head and put his hand on Baekhyun’s arm. “Tao told me and… uhm no offense but I’m really not interested in you or Tao. I’m only helping Tao with something and… I don’t think Luhan is jealous. He’s too busy snogging with his girlfriend”, he said and got up. When Baekhyun turned around, Xin was indeed all over Luhan’s face.

“What a mess”, Baekhyun murmured and sat down at Sehun’s place. Zitao’s face was emotionless. “Sehun really loves Luhan, quit making jokes about that”, he said coolly.

Baekhyun was picking at his food and didn’t say a word, but when Zitao turned his head, he saw that Baekhyun was fighting with his tears.

“Today is a day I can survive and I will laugh so much that everyone thinks I’m fine. But tomorrow is going to be horrible and I’m scared and I hope that everyone will think my tears are the result of my laughter”, Baekhyun whispered. Zitao looked down.

“I didn’t tell Sehun about Chanyeol and what you did… I only told him that you… you are on our side, you know”, Zitao murmured and put his hand on Baekhyun’s.

Baekhyun looked up with a forced smile, but Zitao could see tears sparkling in his eyes.

“I would never tell anyone”, Zitao said calmly. Baekhyun nodded.

“Sehun and I found a cave… it’s a bit farther outside and you can only reach it with a boat”, Zitao started. Baekhyun opened his mouth.

“Your plan?”, Baekhyun said quietly. Zitao nodded and started explaining.