Jiyong hummed all the way home. He had had a very frustrating day at the studio, nothing had gone as he had wanted, but still he was in good spirits. He was on his way home, to Seunghyun and Soonie. He was desperate for a cozy night in with his resident pabos. If there was anyone that could make him feel better after a horrible day, it was them. 

He keyed in the passcode in such a rush that he made a mistake and had to begin again, he couldn't wait to get inside. A good Soonie-cuddle was just what the doctor had prescribed. She was slowly warming up to him, he could feel their bond growing stronger with every day. He smiled to himself as he recalled all the little moments they had shared together, his brain bent on including Seunghyun too, throwing in some epic fails and funny out-takes. He had the world's most funniest videos right here in his head. 

He hadn't gotten further than one foot on the welcome mat when his dream night was thrown off a cliff, breaking into a million little pieces as it landed on the rocks below, with no hope of gluing it back together. The place was beyond trashed and Soonie was in one of her moods, screaming at the top of her lungs, spraying tears in every direction, like a human sprinkler watering the living room floor. Seunghyun was desperately trying to bribe her with everything and anything between the Earth and the sky, both the possible and the impossible, if only, if only she would stop crying. That was his one and only condition, and if met, he was ready to give her the world. 

Jiyong shook his head in frustration, took off his jacket and absentmindedly threw it on a nearby chair in one swift motion as the rest of his body entered the house. Without a word, he stormed inside, scooped Soonie up and took her into one of the guestrooms. She shrieked like a banshee the whole way, struggling to escape his clutches, but he didn't waver. He hated playing the bad cop, especially since this was such a difficult period in her short, little life. She regularly woke up crying out for her mom, inconsolable, crying herself back to sleep. He could hardly imagine how hard it was for an adult to go though this kind of loss, but for this tender, little soul that couldn't understand why her mom just up and left one day, his heart ached at the thought of it. He wished he could do something more for her, he wished he didn't have to punish her, but he could feel she needed discipline, that she craved boundaries and structure, none of which Seunghyun offered her. She couldn't feel safe in a world that she herself controlled, she needed to feel that someone had her back, that her world was in good hands, that it too wouldn't be swept from under her feet while she was sleeping.

That being said, he couldn't fathom doing something as drastic as spanking her or locking her alone in an empty room. So he did the only thing he could think of, he took her into one of the most basic guestrooms, where there were no toys and no distractions, put her down in one of the corners and sat down right in front of her, blocking her escape. He thought it best to let her vent her pent up feelings of frustration, sadness, loss, loneliness, all of it. The most dangerous thing in this world were unattended feelings imprisoned inside the heart, cooped up for too long, either growing into an uncontrollable demon of wrath that would end up poisoning the soul, or turning the heart into a truly impenetrable prison from which they couldn't escape, and as a side effect, nothing could enter it either, locking all the good outside. 

She screamed and tried to claw her way out, but he was patient and just put her back up against the wall, every single time. And every time she screamed louder, cried harder, and every time he told her that in order to be released from her confinement she would have to calm down. That was the sole condition, but it was not a condition she was prepared to meet, or perhaps she couldn't. It was often hard for grown ups to control their feelings, so he couldn't imagine it being easy for a little rug rat like her, who didn't quite understand yet that she was not the center of the universe, though she was quickly becoming his.

Watching her like this was torture, he wanted nothing more than to take her into his arms and tell her that everything was going to be alright, but he had to be strong. He was so tired, both physically and mentally, every tear bringing him closer to the end of his rope. 

After the tears dried up, the brooding started. She turned around to face the wall, dramatically crossing her arms and letting out a breath of discontent. Without moving an inch, that stubborn nugget ignored him for what felt like at least half an hour. He was amazed at her tenacity. 

The quiet gave him time to think, and the more he thought, the more frustrated he became with Seunghyun. He left all the hard chores up to him. It had always been like that, both with Big Bang and in their personal lives. He ducked responsibilities like they were bullets, leaving others to take the hits for him. Jiyong had been hit once too many, the pain from the bruises under his bullet proof vest was approaching the unbearable. It was only a matter of time before he would collapse. 

Soonie sneaked a peek at him, holding her hands partially over her eyes, thinking she was being subtle but couldn't have been more obvious about it. Jiyong fought a chuckle and won. This would all have been for nothing if he backed down now, so no matter how cute she was, he had to maintain his poker face. 

When he didn't react, she turned around and with teary eyes and a remorseful expression, she reached out to him with both arms. The moment he picked her up, her pudgy, little arms locked themselves around his neck as if they were never going to let go again, hugging him as tight as a baby monkey would its mother. A weary smile made its way to his lips. He was so thankful that she had come to her senses, and hoped she had learned something from this ordeal. 

To lift up her spirit, he put his lips on her neck and blew, making a funny sound that tickled her as well. She screeched happily, pinching his head between her shoulder and her head, laughing loudly when he pretended he was stuck. 

Ready for bed, the two of them crawled under the covers. Soonie reached over and gave him a kiss, as if nothing was more natural. A simple little gesture that turned his world upside down. He could feel warmth traveling from the spot where she kissed him, spreading everywhere. He felt like they were connected by an invisible line, that Soonie was becoming a part of him. So if Soonie hurt, he would hurt too. He had never felt anything as disconcerting. His head repeatedly told him it was a bad idea, but his heart had already attached the line deep within itself, refusing to let go.

He watched her sleep for a short while. She reminded him of a peaceful angel. Seeing her now, one couldn't have guessed what had gone on earlier that same night, the demon hiding somewhere deep within her. 

He quietly exited the room, closing the door extra carefully while holding his breath. He did not fancy waking her up and having to start the fight all over again. When he turned around, his face fell off. The living room looked like a bomb test site, nothing was in its right place. And in the middle of the pile of crap was Seunghyun, sitting leisurely on the couch, having a sip of red wine, acting as if he was at a posh wine lounge and not in his recently demolished house. Seunghyun hadn't done one single thing while he had been battling Soonie, not one. They couldn't just leave it like this, for tomorrow was just around the corner and they needed a clear battlefield to have a chance of winning the war. His rope had reached its end, leaving him nothing on to which to hold, free falling into a vortex of desperation.

“Seriously? You didn't do anything all night?!” he sent him a death stare, the exhausted version. Seunghyun looked at him like he was completely innocent in all this, offering him some wine. He couldn't do this anymore, he felt like he was alone in the world. It couldn't go on like this any longer, he was too tired, too frustrated. It was as if a switch inside him had been flipped, from 'suppression' to 'release all hell', and release he did.

“I've had it!! You only ever do the fun things, and I get stuck with the rest!” he shouted.

“Oh, come on, I'm soooo tired, you won't believe the day I've had...” Seunghyun pouted like he had the hardest job in the whole world while everyone else's life was like a vacation. How self-centered could one person get? 

“The day you've had?!? How do you think my day was, huh? Do you think I spent it dancing in a field of roses, do you?” he growled.

“We're supposed to be working together, but I feel like I'm all alone in this.” he added, his voice starting to waver. He paused in an attempt to gather himself, this was not the time to break down, he needed to present a strong front since he wanted to resolve this right here, right now. 

Seunghyun stood up, folding his arms resolutely. Judging by his expression, he felt wronged. Normally he was too lazy to be bothered to stand up for himself, but when pushed into a corner, his claws came out. And they were razor sharp. 

“Let's switch! I'm never alone and it's driving me nuts!! I'm not kidding. I'm this close to checking myself into a mental institution.” Seunghyun held up his thumb and index finger so that the space between them was barely discernable, his eyes on fire. 

“If I don't have some alone time to get my mind off things, I get trapped in my own world, and I start feeling like it's going to come crashing down on me at any second. I can't breathe.” he added, his voice growing louder and more hysterical with every word. He looked like he was preparing for a fight, his whole body on alert, but suddenly he did a 180°, deflating like a leaky balloon.

“You know, you're doing great. You're a hero in my books. Everything doesn't have to be perfect. Life just happens, you can't force it to bend at your will, you just have to ride the waves.” he sighed, his eyes turning soft as he opened his arms. “Come on.”.

“What? Where to?” Jiyong said, confused. He hadn't expected this at all, Seunghyun's kind words slowly sinking in. 

“Just come.” Seunghyun reiterated, walking over to him instead. He took him into his arms, hugging him so tight he could feel him everywhere. Jiyong finally felt like he wasn't falling through space without a safety harness, he felt safe for the first time in a long time. The exhaustion was making it impossible to keep holding everything in, the dam was about to burst. Leaning on Seunghyun's shoulder, he let go. 

Jiyong opened his laptop, careful not to make a sound. Seunghyun was asleep on the sofa beside him. It had been a tough night for the both of them. Not knowing where to start, he googled rare discontinued cereal brands. Surprisingly, there was a whole underground society of collectors, actively sharing information and swapping merchandise. After getting lost in this strange world for a bit, he found the perfect box of cereal. Excited at the thought of how elated Seunghyun would be when he received his present, he pressed 'purchase'.