Chapter 32
“This is nice,” Jin Ri sighed contentedly, leaning her head on Shin Jae’s shoulder.

They were by the Han River, sitting on the grass, relaxing after a mini picnic. Shin Jae smiled then grabbed the blanket he had brought with them. He proceeded to cover Jin Ri with it. She had been getting more and more stressed with finalizing the wedding preparations as the day drew nearer so he wanted to help her forget it for a while and just relax. Although, he suspected that she was more stressed about the wedding itself more than the preparations for it.

“This is nice,” he agreed. He leaned his head on her head. Softly, he asked, “Jinnie, are you happy?”

She lifted her head and looked at him curiously. “Of course I am. Why do you ask?”

He shrugged and sighed, looking at the river. “You know I just want you to be happy, right?” He breathed deeply once more and met her eyes.

“Don’t worry so much about me,” she told him. “We all make decisions and this is mine to make.” She gave him a smile. “I’m stronger than you think.”

He smiled in return, a bit sadly and leaned to kiss her on the side of her head. “Hey, Siwon hyung called yesterday and told me that they’re having a get-together in their dorms,” he relayed, changing the subject.

“I know,” she replied, leaning her head on his shoulder once more. “Kibum oppa told me about it. But I told him I couldn’t go because we’re spending the day together.”

“I just remembered that I have to do some work today,” he stated with a small sigh. She lifted her head and looked at him with a frown on her face. “Sorry,” he said, reaching for her hand and squeezing it. “You should go, though.”

“I don’t know,” she hesitated. She knew that Shin Jae was trying his hardest to incorporate her friendship with the Super Junior members in their life. She knew it must hurt him somehow and she didn’t want him getting hurt because of that. “I think I’ll just go edit the photos from the shoot I did yesterday, while you’re off at work.”

“Don’t you want to hang out with them?” he asked her. “You’ve been away for a while. I’m sure they miss you.”

“That’s the thing,” she countered. “I’ve been away in a time when we should be spending time with each other. We’re getting married soon.”

He looked at her for a couple of seconds, as if he was studying her. “That we are,” he finally said. “That’s why I’m sharing you now, because once we get married, I get to have you all to myself.” He moved to stand up. “C’mon, I’ll drive you there.”

“Already? Isn’t it too early?” she asked, standing up and looking at her watch. It was only 3:30 in the afternoon.

~ * ~

“Are you sure you’re going to be okay going through that?” Shin Jae asked worriedly as he stopped the car a couple of meters away from the Super Junior dorm. He watched as the fans camped out chanted Super Junior songs.

“Don’t worry about it,” Jin Ri assured him, turning to him and giving him a kiss on the cheek. “I’ll see you later.”

As she walked towards the building, she took a deep breath and pulled her hood up to hopefully cover her face. She had a couple of not-so-pleasant run-ins with the Super Junior fans in the past. It was around the time when the fans caught Kyuhyun crying during a performance. Then the fans somehow managed to connect it to the rumors going around that she and Kyuhyun had broken up. It was then that the fans escalated their hate of her, going as far as rallying outside her apartment building and even their company building. She had gotten into a few scuffles with them, one where she sprained her wrist and another one where she sported a bleeding lip. But those weren’t the things that hurt the most. Somehow, the fans had found out all about her past. They splashed her pregnancy, engagement and miscarriage on the Internet and newspapers as if it was entertainment. It all stopped when she moved to Japan. Or at least she stopped reading and hearing about it.

Slowly moving through the crowd, she bit her lip, hoping no one would notice her and recognize her. But luck wasn’t on her side that day. Someone did notice and recognize her. In a flash, her hood was pulled down and everyone just seemed to close in on her. There was a lot of scratching and clawing. A lot of vicious words got thrown into the fray, words that cut deeply more than any other bruise could. It was a good thing that two security guards arrived and hurriedly pulled her out of there.

“Miss, are you okay?” one of the guards asked her, looking very concerned. They had brought her inside the building. He recognized her as one of the Super Junior members’ special lady friends.

“I’m fine,” she guaranteed, smiling. “Thank you.” She wiped her cheek with the sleeve of her sweater and winced when she felt pain. She turned towards the glass doors and watched as he girls outside yelled vulgar things with her name connected to it. “I guess I can’t leave even if I’m such a mess.” Turning towards the guards, she asked, “I don’t look too bad, right?”

They both shook their head then one of them handed her a piece of tissue paper. “Just hold this to your cheek,” he kindly instructed.

She smiled and thanked them then proceeded to go to the 11th floor, where the get-together was going to take place. As she rang the buzzer, she wondered what kind of get-together it was and what kind of food she should cook for them. She didn’t have much time to mull it over because the door opened and her breath got caught in .

“Jin Ri?” Kyuhyun said, a surprised look on his face. His hair was wet and he had a towel in one hand, like he was just drying his hair just moments ago.

They stood there for a while, just looking at each other, both unsure as to how to proceed. Both really didn’t expect to see each other so soon and without warning. Once Kyuhyun realized that he was keeping a guest outside, he immediately let her in.

“I didn’t know you guys were back,” Jin Ri conversationally commented, looking around the dorm. Not much seemed to have changed.

“We just got back this morning,” he told her, gesturing to the sofa so she could have a seat and hanging his towel on one of the chairs.

“Where are the others?” she then asked, not sitting down. She noticed that the dorm was quiet, a sure sign that no one was home. That, or they’re all asleep, which was quite impossible in their dorms at this time of the day.

He merely shrugged. “Do you want anything to eat or drink?” He did a double take when she shook her head and brought her hand down from her cheek. “What happened?” he demanded, moving in front of her and touching her chin to lift her face up.

“What?” she asked, a bit confused. “It’s not that bad. The guards said so.” She walked towards the mirror on the other side of the room. She gasped with what she saw. There was a pretty big gash on her cheek, which was bleeding. “Oh my.”

“Oh my is right,” he said, sounding irritated. He grabbed her wrist and brought her to the kitchen. As she sat down and as he rummaged around for some bandages and medicine, he began to ask questions. “What happened? What did you do?”

“I went here is what I did,” she replied, rolling her eyes. She didn’t see what the big deal was. It was just a cut and it would heal.

He stopped what he was doing and turned to face her. “Did the fans do this?”

“It’s not a big deal,” she answered with a shrug, not meeting his eyes.

“How is it not a big deal when you get hurt like this?” he demanded, standing in front of her. He shouldn’t be upset, but he was because he wasn’t able to protect her when he had always promised he would. He put medicine on a cotton ball and started dabbing it on the gash. She winced. “You know how crazy fans are.”

“Well you told me not to worry about the fans so I didn’t,” she retorted. She only realized what she said when he stopped putting medicine on her cheek and started looking at her in surprise.

“You still remember that?” he asked curiously. That conversation of theirs seemed so long ago. She merely shrugged and winced as she did so.

Kyuhyun noticed this. He immediately asked her to remove her sweater. His suspicions were right he saw her right shoulder starting to bruise. He swore under his breath and started treating the bruise as well, crouching down.

“You should have told me,” he said after a long silence. He concentrated his attention on her arm.

“We weren’t exactly on speaking terms,” she commented quietly, staring at a spot on the wall. She hissed when he pressed her arm too hard.

“Sorry,” he quickly apologized. Then he looked at her. “You made it impossible for us to be on speaking terms. You changed your number and you left. You didn’t have to do that. I promised you I’d leave you alone.”

“You were only able to leave me alone because I changed my number,” she pointed out.

He stared at her for a moment then shook his head. “It was Eunhyuk hyung, wasn’t it?” He shook his head again. “I’m really going to have to stop talking to him about things.”

After having put bandages on her cheek and shoulder, they settled down on the sofa in the living room and watched TV just like they used to. Kyuhyun was flipping channels when Jin Ri yawned. She covered with her left hand just as he turned to look at her, his eyes flicking to her fourth finger.

“Aren’t you supposed to be engaged?” he asked straightforwardly.

She frowned at this. She had been wondering when they would start talking about the wedding. It seemed like the most awkward subject for the both of them. “I am engaged,” she simply replied.

“You mean he didn’t give you a ring?” he asked, turning in his seat to get a better look at her. He looked very surprised.

“What are you talking about?” she asked, confused. “Of course I have a ring. It’s right—.” She held out her left hand and saw her fourth finger. There was no ring.

She hurriedly stood up in panic, looking around the sofa and on the floor, thinking that she had dropped it. She hurried over to her bag and looked through it, spilling the contents on the kitchen table.

“You weren’t wearing one when you got here,” he told her with a shrug.

She stopped what she was doing and turned to him. “I… wasn’t?” She had just begun to think about the possibility that she had actually forgotten to wear it that day when the other members arrived.

“Look who’s here!!!” a new voice yelled.

She turned around and smiled widely. “Mimi!”

Zhoumi gave her a big hug and didn’t let her go until the protesting from the other members became violent. “I missed you,” he sincerely imparted, pouting. “I can’t believe you cut contact.”

“Sorry,” she immediately apologized. “It was something I had to do. I hope you understand.” She stood on tiptoe and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

“Just don’t do it again,” he ordered. She nodded eagerly. Before he could ask her about her cheek, he was pushed aside by the EunHae kids.

There was a couple of happy cheers and a bit of a scuffle after Zhoumi released her. She was then engulfed in a tangle of arms. She smiled and hugged them all back one by one, especially those who had just come back from China.

“How are you, Jin?” Donghae asked, affectionately giving her a kiss on the forehead. He then frowned when he saw her bandaged cheek. He looked over her head at Kyuhyun, who merely nodded towards her as if to say ask her. “Jin?” he then asked, looking at her once more.

“The fans were just a bit overexcited,” she summarized, starting to put her stuff back in her bag. The fact that she wasn’t wearing her engagement ring bothered her. She’d never forgotten to wear it before.

“What?” a couple of the members chorused in concern.

“The fans hurt you?” Leeteuk repeated, looking upset and apologetic at the same time.

“It’s not that bad,” she assured them.

“It’s bad,” Kyuhyun insisted, speaking for the first time from the time the members had arrived. He was leaning against the back of the couch, his arms crossed on his chest. “She has a bruise on her shoulder as well.”

She shook her head and smiled. “It’s not as bad as what they’ve been saying about me,” she mumbled under her breath, fixing the contents of her bag.

“Excuse me, what?” Heechul demanded, leaning closer to her. When she didn’t say anything and just turned red, he frowned.

“What have people been saying?” Sungmin wanted to know, looking worried.

“Nothing you guys haven’t heard before,” she answered then smiled brightly. “How about I cook for you guys? It’s been a while, hasn’t it?” Without waiting for an answer from anyone, she moved towards the kitchen and started working.

The boys stood there, stunned. All were asking the same questions, whether she was referring to her past. Kyuhyun uncrossed his arms expectantly as Heechul moved across the room and turned the computer on. The second eldest slapped Donghae’s hand when he offered to help. Eunhyuk snickered at this and commented that Donghae would probably shut the whole computer down just by touching it, to which the fish responded rather violently and tackled him to the floor.

The headlines were horrible and, being a person who wasn’t used to all the limelight and harshness of the fans and the press alike, Heechul knew it must have hurt Jin Ri a lot. He straightened up and made a beeline for her in the kitchen. The members watched as he turned the girl around to face him and hugged her tightly, muttering his sincerest apologies. Ryeowook made a move to go through the headlines and gasped, glancing up at the girl he had so unfairly condemned. Despite everything that had happened, despite all the hurt that they felt she caused, they never wanted any of this for her. She was probably hurting more than all of them combined and none of them was ever there for her.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Shindong asked as Jin Ri began serving them the food.

She smiled and patted his cheek. “Yes, oppa, I’m fine. I promise. I’m stronger than you think. Besides, I knew fully well what I signed up for when Kyuhyun and I—.” She stopped mid-sentence and bit her lip. Kyuhyun, who was in the kitchen, stilled his movements as well.

Jin Ri and Kyuhyun both wondered if it was always going to be this awkward from now on. Both secretly and sadly agreed that it probably was going to be. So much had changed over the past months. 

Kyuhyun still wondered if she still loved him, even in the tiniest sense of the world. But he was beginning to accept the fact that, even if she did, she had made her choice. It wasn’t something that he could persuade her from doing otherwise. He felt like he had done his part. It was her move this time and if she chose Shin Jae already, he was just going to have to learn to live with that.

Jin Ri wondered about Kyuhyun and his seeming indifference to her. It wasn’t that she wanted him to continue pining over her—she didn’t, but she was surprised that he was able to move on so quickly when he had continued to promise over and over again that he would always go after her. Then she remembered that he had also promised that he would stop bothering her. She should start living with that.

“Okay!!!” Leeteuk proclaimed, clapping his hands to ease the tension. “LET’S EAT!”

Everything will be fine. Both convincing themselves, they glanced at each other and smiled.